Devilish Dreams

[Reticus0102]

Finally, I've found a forum to which I can discuss these very realistic and disturbing nightmares that I plague me most of my life. I've had the same recurring, slow progression dream since I was a kid, I grew up in the country side on a farm with cows and chickens I remember when laying my head down at night the dread I felt when I knew I had to fall asleep. So with that being said, I remember watching what I thought was the devil leaping from tree limb to tree limb getting closer and closer to me, I slept in the furthest room in the back of the house which also happened to be the room that allowed attic access, I would be what I thought was wide awake hearing the lumbering creaks which I then thought were footsteps in the attic, soon afterwards I remember trying to escape through my bedroom door and making it into the hallway before some sort of beast would latch onto the back of my foot and drag me up in the attic. I remember the feeling of when I was being dragged up to that attic, it was terrifying, one of the worst feelings that I've ever had. So lets fast forward a bit to my early teen years. As you recall I was saying these dreams progressed, or maybe it's that I see them as a progression, I'm not entirely sure. However, the once repetitive dream of being dragged into the attic had almost left me, however it had mutated into something weird and in an odd sense, a lot less terrifying. So, as I would call this the second portion of my dream, the only thing I can remember about this one is swimming in what I thought was lava, I remember walking down steps while embers from a fire fell around me, as well as remembering how warm my skin felt, and how when I walked into the lava my skin started to slowly peel away and as I said earlier, as odd as it may sound, it felt so comforting and warm. I had this dream along with a combination of meeting one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen in my life which just so happened to be red headed. Make fun if you want, but it wasn't long after this I started to draw, for whatever reason I wasn't satisfied with the length of this dream and the time I spent with my redheaded dream girlfriend, and we all know we can't exactly snap photo's in dreams, so that being said, I felt really close to this dream girl. After having this dream for years it progressed into something else. Both of those dreams were just that, they were dreams, however, I'm now almost 33 years old and the dream I'm having now literally shocks and horrifies me to the point of I feel like I should just accept this as who I am and give into what I feel like is darkness calling to me. I literally have dreams now that I am the devil, I can't remember to many details as I do in the other two, however I remember the feeling of being powerful like nothing can stop me, a hatred so strong that it takes every last ounce of energy that I have to fight it off and hold onto the person I really am. I wake up talking about crazy things, my girlfriend has called and woke me up before and I've actually answer the phone in a very disturbing tone of "I am the devil" so I can only assume I must have been having this dream again and I just had no recall of it at the time, I'm so comfortable with this that I'm scared, or perhaps I'm only comfortable with it because I've dealt with this my entire life. Thank you all for taking the time to read, I hope to receive some positive feedback on what these dreams could possibly mean, or how I could make them go away, if that's even possible. I've also had lots of other experiences, but I figured this being a dream forum, I would only post the dreams that I have, but if your interested I can go into as much details as I can about those.

[ParanoidLlama]

First off, I'd like to reassure you that you are not turning evil. It only seems to me that you're being influenced by your dreams, and that influence is changing your dreams, and it just snowballs. Sure, this might sound spiritual, but we all have darkness somewhere in our minds. But that's really just human nature; we all have our bad sides. It's those who let themselves be influenced by it that become bad. It seems those negative emotions of anxiety and anger have manifested itself through your attention and into turning into the "devil". You have to put in your mind that those dreams are meaningless. Yes, there are some rather dark parts in your subconscious, but that doesn't mean it should take over for you. I'm sure if you just change your mindset, it could have a great affect on how you're feeling. I know it'll be tough, but better start now, eh? As for the dreams, they're pretty much meaningless. I'm guessing they appeared because of the anxiety you're having. These are just my ideas.

[Reticus0102]

First off, I'd like to reassure you that you are not turning evil. It only seems to me that you're being influenced by your dreams, and that influence is changing your dreams, and it just snowballs. Sure, this might sound spiritual, but we all have darkness somewhere in our minds. But that's really just human nature; we all have our bad sides. It's those who let themselves be influenced by it that become bad. It seems those negative emotions of anxiety and anger have manifested itself through your attention and into turning into the "devil". You have to put in your mind that those dreams are meaningless. Yes, there are some rather dark parts in your subconscious, but that doesn't mean it should take over for you. I'm sure if you just change your mindset, it could have a great affect on how you're feeling. I know it'll be tough, but better start now, eh? As for the dreams, they're pretty much meaningless. I'm guessing they appeared because of the anxiety you're having. These are just my ideas. Thanks for taking the time to reply ParanoidLlama, you advance & input is appreciated. Today I was diagnosed to PTSD, so I guess I have that going for me, and it also explains why these dreams have started back up so frequently. I don't know man, it's really frustrating, I've not slept in 2 days.

[ParanoidLlama]

That's rough. I'm truly sorry for you. I'm sure you might have already thought about it, but I believe lucid dreaming can really help you with your sleeping problem. If you can associate the devil as being in a dream, you could make your nights a little less frightening.

[Eonnn]

I've had a similar dream before where I was a dark overlord of hell, flying on a black dragon feeling extremely powerful. I've since learnt to embrace the dark side in me and have fun with it in my dreams. I've had other dreams where I just become completely evil and destroy everything and everyone. There's nothing dangerous about it because your dreams are a safe place to experiment and do whatever you wish. So long as you can separate the two and keep waking life normal why not have a little fun? It feels really good to embrace that dark side.

[xFallenKnight53]

When I was a little kid I had a dream where Michael Myers was in my house and the only safe place I could go was on my mothers bed however I was too small to jump up there and i was begging my mom to let me on the bed and she refused and then Michael came through the door. Another dream I had where I was sitting on mothers bed messing with a baseball (my legs where hanging over the edge) something grabbed me and dragged me under the bed and held my mouth so I couldn't scream. I had one dream about 2 or so years ago that I walked into my old room from a duplex I lived in and the door was slammed shut behind me and the room was completely black and there was a demon that was sucking my life force away and I managed to leave before he could take all my strength away. After that one whenever I was in a dark room I started to feel all my strength being sucked out of me. When I was little and I would move onto my side, every time I would go to sleep listening to my heart beat I would dream I walked up the stairs in my old apartment and when I would go back down the whole bottom floor and entrance were gone and I would walk outside, it was autumn and leaves were on the ground there was this chain length fence with an opening that led to a road I would go to the opening and turn back seeing the stairs and I would see a shadow up top, next vines that were hanging on the fence would grab my arms and hold me still while I could hear my heartbeat and I thought it was this monster coming down the stairs each beat was his footsteps. Besides all that, when I was little I would also have many night terrors and have been caught sleep walking.