lucid dream about EX-GF

[helpmoi]

i fell in love with this girl who had a boyfriend she didnt love who fell in love with me in aug 2009-oct 2009. stuff happened and our romance ended. It's been a long time and I can count the times shes been in my dream on one hand. I don't even remember the last time she spawned in my dream world, it must of been years, but last night she did. In my dream I remember telling her how much I still love her and miss her. And she was deciding between me and another guy she may of fell in love with after we ended. I don't know.. I just feel somewhere deep down that maybe shes not very happy in her marriage right now and she might of legitimately thought of me or even had somewht the same dream but from her point of view. Thoughts?

[Sunfire]

I feel you are interpreting this dream quite wrong. Without trying to be harsh, it sounds more hopeful than anything to be honest. Psycologically it sounds to me like your bringing her into your lucid dreams by subconsiously thinking of her in this way - 'i just feel deep down that maybe shes not very happy.' Stuff you think about, even in the back of your mind can and will make an apperance in lucid dreams, dont forget all dream characters actions and dialogue are controlled by your own mind. Hope this helped.

[RavenOfShadow]

I agree with Sunfire in this case. One of the hardest things we Lucid dreamers have to deal with is the context of our dreams. Some people think lucid dreaming will be all fun and dandy, with dream sex and explosions and adventure. However, with raised dream recall and vividness, dreams have a thousand times more impact on us compared to "normal" sleepers. A love interest may pop up for "normals", but more often than not the emotions are dulled, the pictures swim, and they have forgotten the dream in time for breakfast. We, as advanced dreamers, feel powerful raw emotions, and we no longer have the gift of forgetting a dream so easily - we can now brood on it and twist it in our heads all day, just as you are doing now. The hardest thing to do is to still take dreams with a grain of salt, unless in the rare case that they are introspective dreams - I say this because your subconscious knows everything about you (introspective), but you can't possibly learn facts about other people (like if they are somewhat unhappy in their current marriage). As Sunfire said, this wasn't your ex, but rather your subconscious's interpretation of your ex. Just a guess here; In waking life you regret your breakup, and are wishing and hoping that she is unhappy too - if she's unhappy, there may be a chance you two talk again and work things out. Your dreams have picked up on this, and are projecting it like a hellish mirage. It is our hardest burden as advanced dreamers and lucid dreamers to remember that a beautiful woman that says she loves us in a dream, is still just a dream. Worse than any nightmare is when you fall madly in love in a dream, only to wake up. Its the price we pay.