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    Thread: Please share your bad experiences with LD here

    1. #1
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      Thumbs down Please share your bad experiences with LD here

      This morning I had an awful LD, but first, some background. If you don’t wanna read the background, skip to [THE DREAM].

      [BACKGROUND]

      tl;dr: I’m an experienced oneironaut.

      After the LD of today, I just realized today is my first day after 3 months of LD practice for real. I finished reading the book “A Field Guide to Lucid Dreaming” on October 18th and, on that same night, I had a LD and even achieved a complex pre-set goal with therapeutic purposes. So, it’s been officially 3 months now. Since then, I’ve logged 299 dreams, which 53 were lucid (counting with the 3 of today). I have LD’s since 8 and used them to counter nightmares, by waking me up. They were very sporadic, but after I read that book my mind blew and I’m having them frequently. I think this makes me a natural lucid-dreamer, since it looks like my development is off the charts for the amount of time invested when I compare it to other people trying to LD. I don’t even do RCs while awake anymore (I still always do them while dreaming though, just to make 100% sure before, you know, I jump off a window and stuff).

      I’ve read 4 other books in the meanwhile about the subject and I’ve successfully achieved lucidity through many techniques. Even though DILD is my main source of LDs (85%), I’ve done them through WILD, FILD, WBTB and DEILD as well (I don’t count MILD cuz it can’t be accurately measured, but I normally use mantras before sleep so I’m sure they influence my DILD). I’m also developing my own techniques now, click my name and check out another post of mine here about DEILD if you’re interested (it’s the post “Today I rejoined the same LD 4 times, this is how”).

      I’m also well experienced with hypnagogia, hypnagogic hallucinations and sleep paralysis (it’s been years since I last had a SP). I don’t do drugs, have an above-average intelligence and I’m mentally healthy, even though I’ve dealt with depression a few years back (I’m 27 by the way).

      I’ve been using LD’s to learn new skills like surfing, self-healing from a relationship that ended badly and for fun of course, like flying. Everything was going fine.

      This morning I had to wake up early for some calls and went back to sleep after an hour, so it was a WBTB. I was sure I’d have a LD today because I went back to bed.

      [THE DREAM]

      tl;dr: a freaking human-size shadow scared the shit out of my life while lucid.


      I was in the underground garage of my building when I saw a kitty. It was tiny and very angry and agitated. I had to hold its neck in a way he wouldn’t turn around and bite my hand, it was like handling a poisonous snake. Looking closer, it was creepy: one of his eyes were missing and he had a big open wound behind his ear all the way to the missing eye. I was taking it to my apartment when he suddenly escaped the elevator and ran back to the garage.

      When I approached him, he said “help me” looking down to the metal grid of the sewer on the ground. That surprised me and was a bit scary, but I immediately gained lucidity, because I knew cats don’t talk. I looked at my hand for the usual extra-fingers RC but it was a perfectly normal hand. Sometimes the hand RC does that to me, but since I was pretty sure I was dreaming, I tried pinching my nose. I could breath normally, which led me to the conclusion I was really dreaming after all, thus going lucid as usual.

      Usually when I get lucid in a dream while interacting with a dream figure, they get a blank stare and leave the scenario completely ignoring me, as if they were robots. The cat actually did that for a second, but then he returned standing on the metal grid on the floor. I thought to myself “maybe he wants me to help him grab a mouse stuck there or something, let’s see where this dream takes me if I help him”, but I barely finished that sentence in my mind when A FREAKING BLACK CLOUD LEAKED FROM THE KITTEN’S WOUND AND BECAME A BLACK HUMAN FIGURE WITH #@¨!& RED GLOWING EYES AND A TERRIBLE, THREATENING PRESENCE. Completely unexpected.

      We were immediately teleported to my bedroom, which I hate because whenever I’m in my bedroom in a dream, it’s dark (as if it’s in the middle of the night). This is also the reason I stopped using the DEILD technique explored in the book “The Phase”, it feels like what people believe to be an “OBE”, Astral Projection and all that bs talk that goes beyond the science field which I despise, otherwise I wouldn’t be posting here but in the Paranormal section (definitely not my style).

      Anyway, the whole thing gets weirder. The shadow starts trying to touch me and teleporting all over my room really fast, crossing from one invisible portal to another in zigzag patterns. Another reason I don’t like dreaming in my room is because of false awakenings. To make really sure I was still dreaming and maintaining lucidity, I kept my right hand pinching my nose and breathing and with the left hand, I was trying to keep the creature away from me while praying and trying to banish it. It was scary and vivid as shit. I know the drill here and while fighting that thing I even remembered Morley saying in his book about “accepting the shadow aspects” of ourselves, giving them a hug and absorbing them to us. I’ve done it before with different dream characters, but nothing like this. I promptly dismissed the idea, as if I KNEW deep inside I shouldn’t touch that thing. My body was all screaming at me that it wasn’t right, I was in a super-state of alertness and euphoria, as if my life was threatened. It was AN INTRUDER, something really bad and indescribable. I know the stuff my dreams are made of and I’ve even ben through some deep crazy daddy issue traumas for healing while in a LD, but this… thing, it wasn’t something mundane.

      After I got tired of fighting it, I went through my wall and started flying in the sky, turning the night into day. I made a beautiful golden sky and was finally having fun in that LD. After a while, I woke up, but DEILD’d my way back into the dream thinking I would be safe now. Nope, I was right back in my bedroom, all dark and the damn thing was still there with those freaking red eyes, man just imagine if it were you looking at that right in front of you, vivid. I went through the wall again and flew far away. Woke up again, stayed still in bed with eyes closed, DEILD’d my way back and same thing happened for the third time. When I couldn’t DEILD my way back again I stayed in bed for another hour, all sweat and terrorized by the experience.

      [CONCLUSION]

      When I was 8, the first time I got sleep paralysis I saw a shadow figure on the corner looking at me and when I understood hypnagogia a while back I stopped fearing it and was sure everything could be explained. I was also relieved many people around the world went through the same experience. “It’s just a hallucination”. That’s what I’ve told people many times whenever they had a scary experience while lying in bed. Plus I never saw that shadow again until today, didn’t think nor remember it, so I thought everything was cool. The first thing I thought when I woke up for real was “I’m never doing LD again”, but now I’m calmer. But it was a hell of an unexpected experience. And even though I couldn’t see it’s mouth, I felt as if the damn thing was smiling at me the entire time, as if it was having lots of fun while I was terrified. This is messed up.

      On a regular dream this would just be a scary nightmare, and on SP there’s the hallucination explanation of hypnagogia. I still don’t rationally understand how things turned out that bad. My advice: don't try the Morley technique of hugging this thing if you ever come across it in a LD.

      I'll try to engage it in a different manner next time, like talking from a distance or holding it captive in a dome or something I don't know, but don't "absorb" it into you! That was my gut feeling back then.

      Anyone ever had a similar encounter while lucid?
      Last edited by sujiro; 01-20-2016 at 12:19 AM.

    2. #2
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      This sort of stuff comes with the territory of LDing as it does with regular dreams. It is scary when something seems so disturbingly real. Maybe it is sometimes, who knows.

      But in a dream, whatever it is, your waking self is always physically safe from it. And if your waking self is mentally harmed by something in a dream, the damage can be reversed.
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    3. #3
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      Quote Originally Posted by dolphin View Post
      This sort of stuff comes with the territory of LDing as it does with regular dreams. It is scary when something seems so disturbingly real. Maybe it is sometimes, who knows.

      But in a dream, whatever it is, your waking self is always physically safe from it. And if your waking self is mentally harmed by something in a dream, the damage can be reversed.
      Thanks for the reply. I'm just trying to rationalize the experience. At first I thought it could be that I lost lucidity somewhere in the middle of the mess but that wasn't the case, I remembered Morley's technique while engaging the thing.

      I've also read that some dream figures just don't obey you or can be controlled properly. I just got unlucky that this time, it was something so grotesque as this Noob Saibot psycho on pot.

    4. #4
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      Actually, you did lose a bit of lucidity. Lucidity is knowledge that you're dreaming, so thinking that something in the dream might be a real intruder from waking life shows a loss of this knowledge.

      As for rationalizing the experience, your unconscious mind is still at work when you're dreaming, which can sometimes defy your conscious expectations. For example, your mind can incorporate things that are happening around your sleeping body into your dreams, so given that the dream character only appeared in your room, maybe there was something in your room that was subconsciously disturbing you while you were dreaming.

      You did wake up sweating, so the dream character could have very well represented the heat of the room you were sleeping in.
      Last edited by dolphin; 01-20-2016 at 04:25 AM.

    5. #5
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      Quote Originally Posted by dolphin View Post
      Actually, you did lose a bit of lucidity. Lucidity is knowledge that you're dreaming, so thinking that something in the dream might be a real intruder from waking life shows a loss of this knowledge.

      As for rationalizing the experience, your unconscious mind is still at work when you're dreaming, which can sometimes defy your conscious expectations. For example, your mind can incorporate things that are happening around your sleeping body into your dreams, so given that the dream character only appeared in your room, maybe there was something in your room that was subconsciously disturbing you while you were dreaming.

      You did wake up sweating, so the dream character could have very well represented the heat of the room you were sleeping in.
      Thanks, your explanation makes sense and satisfies me.
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    6. #6
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      At first I wanted to write something like: "a LD can't be a bad experience, because you can change it, blah blah blah, at least I don't remember any bad LDs...", but then I remembered one pretty bad one... Well, to be fair, I had it when I was like 10. Back then I didn't think to try to induce lucids, much less practice IRL ways to help me control them... So I'll just sum up the dream:

      1. Me going through my day casually, talking to my grandma, mom, sister and dad, eating, playing, etc. Suddenly I notice that grandma acts very strange, tends to "zone out" and aggressive when I confront her. I "observe" her and decide something thing isn't right. I tell my sister, who promised to confront grandma. However the next I see her, she's just like her (weird, paranoid, aggressive). I tell dad about it, and he agrees with my observations, confronts them while I watch. They kill him, revealing themselves to be human-sized cockroach body-snatchers (WTF brain?!?). They drag away his body, probably to harvest the skin, and then notice me. I run, they're after me. Mom just comes back home, I tell her everything but they deny it and she thinks I'm crazy. I tell her to find dad if she doesn't believe me. Then she suddenly reveals that she was the first one to be turned. And the three of them kill me by tearing my body parts off...
      2. I wake up covered in sweat, thinking WTFing sort of nightmare it was... I go through the hall way, having an intense déjà vu when I look at the door frame (that has a mark on it). Then, part one basically repeats itself apart from the order of deaths and other details. I'm still not lucid... This time they kill me by stubbing to the chest...
      3. I wake up covered in sweat, thinking 'wow, some intense nightmares'... Going through the same hallway I again notice the mark. I was like 'what, that can't be, can it?' I suspect it's a dream and this time expect my family members to be body-snatchers, but can't really be sure I'm right about the dreaming thing... Well, I hide when they kill my dad (grandma and mom),
      and realize it's a dream, and in this version my sister wasn't turned yet... So I sneak out, intercept her on the way home and tell her everything. She just makes fun of me for being an imaginative child, and comes home and is like "can you believe your son thinks you are giant body-snatchers. They attack us, kill her, I injure one of them, but eventually they bash my head with something (and I guess I died).
      4. I wake up covered in sweat, realizing I'm dreaming. I'm like 'I'm not going to play this game any more... I'll just hide in my room and try to wake up for real before they come to kill me...' Well, I tried everything to wake up but couldn't... They were calling me, I was just keep replying "just a minute! Be right there"... They eventually come into my room, and I was like "I know that you're body-snatchers, and that this is a dream... Just please don't kill me again" (since that was one of the few dreams in which I felt actual pain! And every time they killed me differently...). They replied "It's ain't no dream." And then talk among themselves that they'll have to torture me to discover how I know about them. They reveal their (cockroach) form and chase after me, scratching me (with their "tenticle" things), but not being able to grab me. I'm surrounded on the balcony and decided that maybe suicide will wake me up, and just jump off... Bad idea since didn't die immediately...
      5. I wake up covered in sweat, realizing I'm still dreaming. I decide to fight them off and kill them all, or at least to save my dad / sister (the ones that are turned during the dream, not already turned). Well I successfully kill "grandma", and "dad" who was already turned. But my "mom" (in the cockroach form) captures me... The creature tells me what a nuisance I'm to their race, and is interrupted by my sister entering the house, but it just kills her... I just request one thing "kill me quickly" - to not feel pain, so the creature agreed. It held my head, and I guess snapped it since everything went black.
      6. I wake up covered in sweat, realizing I'm STILL dreaming. I again decide that I must beat them all to wake up, since nothing else works... This time I'm much smarter since I remembered the exact events from the rest of the dreams, and took them out one by one and in surprise... Got injured towards the end, and was fighting the creature (that was wearing my dad before), when my sister came in. She was shocked, and I yelled, "help me kill it!". She bashed it's head and distracted it for enough milliseconds for me to gut it with a kitchen knife. It died... I told her everything (but she didn't believe the dream part). The dream was still not fading... Eventually I convinced her to kill me
      - and I finally woke up for real !

      Throughout the dream, especially reps 2-4, I observed the dream scenery in much disbelief - everything was completely life like, and there were very few changes from my actual RL house. These changes however stayed consistent between the reps, down to the mark on the door frame, and a light in the bathroom that was broke (won't turn on).
      You can imagine how intense that was if I recorded it (in my "DJ") approximately 10 years later with all that detail (and much more). Heck, to write this I didn't even need to listen to that several year old recording...

    7. #7
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      Hey there,

      I'll add one from my experiences too.

      A few years ago, I become lucid in a house I used to live in. Excited and with a clear dream goal in mind, I ran outside and declared myself 'god of the dreamworld', hoping to give myself absolute dream control. Instead, the next thing I knew the dream seemed to implode on me, and I literally felt it like some huge crushing weight that completely trapped me and pinned me down. I couldn't do anything anymore. With some effort I managed to wake myself up, but it was like dragging myself through a claustrophobic, much too tight space.

      Needless to say, I decided to be a bit more humble in my next lucid dreams

      -Redrivertears-
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    8. #8
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      Wow, that sucks Spock. I've got shot in the head in a few non-lucid dreams and was still alive in the ground, it was terrible. Being killed over and over by cockroaches is tough for a 10 yo. Have you watched MIB at some point before that dream? Maybe that's what instilled this theme.

      And that's crazy, Red! The subconscious is one tricky pony...
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    9. #9
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      I decided to touch an anglerfish looking dcs teeth and felt extreme pain. As painful as getting a shot.

      One time, angry DCs surrounded me before one killed me by hitting me over the head with a golf club.

      Many a DC has attacked me: ghosts, dogs, cats, lions, bears, alligators, sharks. Even dolphins bite me sometimes. It hurts, too.

      Not being able to move freely in a lucid dream is like drinking diluted root beer.

      Still though, a bad dream is better than none at all! I'll take what I can get.
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    10. #10
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      I totally agree with dolphin - having these experiences is worth it since ya know, eventually you wake up, and think how awesome it is that even dying can be simulated! Also, these nightmares teach us lessons - in the case of my cockroach dream it's about fighting your fears, and is also about knowledge (I think that with my current LD experience I would be able to make myself wake up, but there I couldn't since I didn't know that dream control is possible, and that it's all about the intention, not the move you do in the dream. With my current experience I would do the same moves, e.g. falling asleep, but I'll have the right intention and won't doubt my ability - which would probably mean I'll be able to exit the nightmare)

      sujiro, I watched MIB but later... I think maybe the Mimic movie had a lot to do with it, but not sure if I watched it before or after. I do remember having a major fear of cockroaches as a child (IRL) - especially the flying type that was in that dream in human size...
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    11. #11
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      Mirrors. They can be pretty disturbing when lucid. If I ever get the slightest doubt there's a danger in looking into one I'm instantly pulled by " a force" right in front of it. Then I'm kept stilland forced to look at the disfigured and scary reflection. I need to start carrying a sledge hammer around in lucids

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