Ok. First of all, I dont know if it is college or high school paper. I dont know the age and attitude of audience.

I dont like the first paragraph. It introduces concept way too quickly and

it may not catch attention of the class. Unless you are a very good speaker.


I also dont see concrete structure of your speech. Its somewhat all over

the place.

You may want to mention some history (LD were used by eastern, african and south american cultures)

You may mention an ongoing scientific research by several independent researchers. Including Dr. Stephen LaBerge.

You may add that LD is a part of unused human potential, and most

children experience their first lucid dream at the age of 5-7, but without guidance, they dont practice this ability.

Lucid dreaming is a very, *very* sensitive topic, I dont know how the

audience will react. If you expect questions, try to have a LD within next

3 days or else borrow someone's description.