Thread: I'm back... I think

Okay, I'm back.
This time I'm going to try my best to stay here.

I've tried SP for the past few nights and I'm always able to get up to my hips before the feeling goes away. I did wake up in SP this morning though and it scared the living crap out of me.

I've really been thinking about LDing because of the nightmares I've been having every night. I keep dreaming about people dying. I killed some guy with a bat that was trying to kill me in one of them, and the feeling of dread after he died was horrible.
I dreamed a few nights ago that someone broke a guys neck and I saw, so he was trying to kill me and my girlfriend. I dreamed about robbing this guys house and knocking out the wife in the house.

I want all of these dreams to be over. I want to be able to control these dreams so I don't wake up every morning upset. It's been two weeks of bad dreams every single night, and I'm tired of it. I want to be able to have good dreams.

Any suggestions would be lovely. I can't remember much from when I studied this, so act like I'm a moron.

Originally Posted by shadownet

I've really been thinking about LDing because of the nightmares I've been having every night. I keep dreaming about people dying. I killed some guy with a bat that was trying to kill me in one of them, and the feeling of dread after he died was horrible.
I dreamed a few nights ago that someone broke a guys neck and I saw, so he was trying to kill me and my girlfriend. I dreamed about robbing this guys house and knocking out the wife in the house.

I want all of these dreams to be over. I want to be able to control these dreams so I don't wake up every morning upset. It's been two weeks of bad dreams every single night, and I'm tired of it. I want to be able to have good dreams.

Shadownet, welcome back! I hope things are better at home now.

Since your dreams have a recurring theme, I looked up what some of them could mean.. as it might help to know what your subconscious may be trying to work through.

Death
Dreams about death are not necessarily bad omens, but they usually represent anxious or angry feelings. To dream of your own death is actually positive - it means renewal and letting go of an old stage of life. This is also a common dream when you are getting over an illness - and it's a good sign that you are getting better. However, if you dream that you are dying slowly, you need to drastically change your routine and reenergize your life. To dream about the death of a loved one, suggests that you are lacking a certain quality that the loved one represents. Ask yourself what makes this person special or what do you like about him. It is that very quality that you are lacking in your own relationship or circumstances. To dream of a death frequently signifies news of a birth. To be aware of a dead person you cannot identify foretells an inheritance which may not be personal, but could be indirectly beneficial to you.

Kill
To dream about killing is not necessarily negative. It often means the dreamer is letting go of old habits and attitudes in order to go on to a new stage of life. However, a dream of being a hitman (a hired killer) is negative - see "Killer", below

Killer
To see a killer commit murder in your dream, foretells sadness caused by the misdeeds of others. If you are a hired killer in your dream, this means you will be involved in some dishonorable adventure which will damage your reputation. To dream that you are killed or being chased by a killer, foretells that enemies are working against you.

Murder
To dream that you have committed a murder suggests that you are involved in a bad situation which will ruin your reputation. You may also have some repressed anger at yourself or at others. If you dream of witnessing a murder in your dream, it forewarns that someone will do something that upsets or saddens you. Dreaming that you are murdered by someone means you have rivals who are secretly conspiring against you. Also see "Murderer", below

Murderer
To see a murderer kill someone in your dream foretells sadness caused by the misdeeds of others. If you are a murderer in your dream, this means you will be involved in some dishonorable adventure which will damage your reputation. To dream that you are killed or being pursued by a murderer, foretells that enemies are working against you.

Shadownet, I wish you luck in understanding your dreams and lucidity to help stop them.

.

Well, since the only relatively new thing in my life is my girlfriend, I hope she's not going to ruin my reputation. Not that I really have one.

School is very stressful for me, and I always feel like I'm failing or behind.
My girlfriend and I have also been having a lot of minor problems recently that
make me angry to the point of wanting to put my fist in a wall. I am going through
a lot at this point of my life, so maybe I'm just stressed and everything.

I have to say that the dream about killing that man with a bat was one of the most horrible dreams I have ever had in my life, if not the most horrifying.
It was very weird and vivid.

I think what made it feel the way it did is because he was looking at me while I was hitting him, and not just looking, he was [I]staring[I] at me. His eyes were filling with blood and the cracking sound of the bat hitting him was awful. Also, I thought about my girlfriend in the dream and how we would never get married because of me doing that, and that I we would never be able to make love. I knew there was no way to cover it up, and even if there was there would be no way I could live with it. I honestly think the worst part of the whole dream was realizing that I would never be able to marry my girlfriend. It was a horrible feeling that I hope I never feel while I'm awake.

I've also been very paranoid recently. I jump at everything and I have to sleep with lights on most nights. I haven't been afraid of the dark in a long time, so I'm not sure what's happening. I can't remember if it started after the bad dreams started or not, so I'm not sure if they're because of them. I can't really do anything anymore unless someone's with me without being afraid. It's really embarrassing, but I'm nearly paralyzed with fear when it comes to anything in the dark now.

shadownet, that sounds like an awful lot to deal with.

Is there anyone you can talk to about all this (a relative, counselor, etc).. someone who can help you make sense of all that you're experiencing and why.

Wow, you have a lot on your mind. Makes my problems look like happy town. Don't ask why I said that, It's 1:31am where I am.
By the way, thanks for the hug Clairity.

Originally Posted by Clairity

shadownet, that sounds like an awful lot to deal with.

Is there anyone you can talk to about all this (a relative, counselor, etc).. someone who can help you make sense of all that you're experiencing and why.

Unfortunately, no.
I don't have any friends, and as horrible as it may seem, I honestly don't care if I ever see most of my relatives every again. I did have a psychologist a while ago, and he said I'm have a little bit of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and extreme social anxiety, but I tried for a year to get rid of him and the medication, so I'm not going back.

But, lets go back to the LDing. My issues are exhausting and we all know I have a lot of them.

I would love to be able to get back into this. I have only had two, but I want to have them more often. Is there a way that I could get them to happen quicker? I'm already starting the dream journal, and I keep trying the Sleep Paralysis to WILD thing. Any suggestions?

P.S.
I do appreciate the concern over my life problems, and I'm not just shrugging anyone off about them. I'm having a lot of trouble recently and I don't have much of a release, which is what I'm hoping LDing will do for me. It would be a release and it would get rid of my bad dreams, so it would help a lot.

i nearly cried because you said all those things. i hope everything gets better for you.

I'm not sure if you're being sarcastic or not...

I'm not asking for sympathy or anything, just explaining the situation.