Hello,
I've been searching on this site and sites like this for some help with my nightmares. And finally decided to seek out the specific help I am after. Here's a little backstory of my dreams: at the age of 4, I started to have night terrors where I would wake up thinking I seen little red dots. I only vaguely remember this but my parents took me to a therapist to try and get to the bottom of it. At this point, nothing traumatic had ever happened to me so my family was stumped. The therapist thought I was seeing red dots from 7up cans or how photographs used to give everyone red dots in their eyes, and turning that into something scary. I have a psychology degree, and his analysis was and is ridiculous. Interesting correlation but the nightmares/night terrors kept up throughout my childhood, into my adolescence. The content changing a bit.
I was always tired in school because I felt like I was active in my sleep. The same way I feel now. I never felt/feel rested. Yet, it was and is now, very easy for me to fall asleep. I don't dread sleep. In fact, I love it; getting sometimes 12 solid hours.
Nightmares are a part of my life. I don't know if I can remember ever having a good dream. And that's the thing- I would remember. I remember all these dreams like they are memories. I often say that my dreams feel like memories. When I am in them, they are so intense, I can't lucid dream. I've been trying for over 5 years nightly.
Here's some other things I've tried: gemstones, meditation, herbs, yoga, Holy water, affirmations, sage, dream journal, viewed them from every psychological standpoint, changed diet and lifestyle over all, worked through my past issues as an adult and childhood issues. I am at a loss for what else to do. I am sure I am forgetting a few things in all these years of searching for a solution but I feel like I have tried everything there is.
My nightmares are about murder, death, safety, protecting myself, losing the ones I care about, trying to protect others, natural disasters, in detailed houses and places I've never been, fire and I always feel scared, unsure. Still, I push through these dreams like they are a secondary reality. They are. They have become so commonplace, I can't tell that they are happening, as they are happening. I cannot tell it's a dream.
I meditate, have had astral projection just a few times and can easily access a place of calm in my mind; no success with lucid dreaming. I know this is super long. I tried to include all the details. Can anyone please help me with this?