Congrats on having some great dreams. Sounds like you should definitely use sex as a dream sign
It sounds like your first lucid dream was a spontaneous DILD (Dream Initiated Lucid). It is fairly common for people to have these, even if they don't know what lucid dreaming is. Knowing what lucid dreaming is, and actively trying should score you a few of these. If you are remembering your dreams, you should notice these happening from time to time.
The other dreams sound like a WILD (Wake Initiated Lucid). In WILD, you don't really ever have the sudden, surprising realization you are dreaming. You just transition from waking directly into dreaming without ever losing track of yourself.
I think the difference between the two is the shock and surprise at realizing you are dreaming. In a DILD, you blatantly tell yourself that you are dreaming, sometimes even performing a reality check to be sure. In WILD, it is more of an obvious understanding, since you watch yourself enter the dream.
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