I have the same problems. My dreams will fade until I can't see anything. Although, it's more of a symbolic fade... I can feel it happening, but I don't really see the effects until I wake up.

Anyways, I find that, by far, the most effective means for my stabilization is to focus on an object. Pick one object and stare at it. More often than not, this will have the effect of the object becoming sharper, changing colors, etc. But it will keep you ground in the dream world. A disembodied voice in one of my lucids gave me some great advice, too (no, I'm not kidding).

I wasn't really thinking right, and I heard some incredibly loud noise. I found it that it was coming from a vacuum cleaner. I tried to unplug it, but it was stuck in the wall. Then the voice came in my head, and I saw writing (it looked like a forum post.). The voice read aloud the writing. It said "Don't worry about trying to stop the noise. Use it. Focus on it, and it will help you stay lucid". And then some incredibly random fact. But that sentence was pure gold for me.