Thread: Gene Pool (A Competition!)

Okay, I just now finished off the first match. I have written up the match report, and I am now uploading pictures.

I can just feel the suspense.

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING POST IS PICTURE HEAVY, BECAUSE PICTURES ARE RAD, YO. IF YOU HAVE SHIT INTERNET THAT CAN'T LOAD LOTS OF PICTURES, WATCH OUT.

Match Number One

Okay, our competitors today are Grunkie's Flippy (which he was kind enough to name), guitarboy's creature, Licity's creature, and Hazel's creature. I have named the final three myself; guitarboy's Smooth Bastard because they move like smooth motherfuckers, Licity's Pink Shit because it is pink, and Hazel's Angry Epileptic, because that perfectly describes how it progresses.

Here is Flippy:


Here is Smooth Bastard:



Here is Pink Shit:



And here is Angry Epileptic:



And we start off the first round!



As you can see, Grunkie's Flippy is the first to lay down some sweet loving and produce children. Licity's creature has made some sweet loving also. But the extremely fast moving and fast mating Flippy seems to be swimming away from each other, which might be a bit of a problem.



Guitarboy's creature has got in the game early too, and his creatures seem to have major Oedipus Complex's going on.



Hazel's creature has still failed to mate, which may be due to the fact that it moves like an angry epileptic.



As we continue in the game, Flippy continues being mildly retarded. Right now it's main tactics seem to be: swim away from food, as fast as possible.




Pink Shit is going along slowly but surely, and has seemed to have formed quite a family dynamic, as opposed to Flippy, who seems to hate every member of it's own species.



Guitarboy's creature moves smoothly and sexily along, forming quite a nice orgy.



But Hazel's Angry Epileptic seems to be the winner right now, in an explosion of population. Well done, you angry freak!

But what's this? A Flippy has invaded guitarboy's Smooth Bastards and mated, producing this abomination:



God-speed, you freaky pink thing.



Here, a few other Flippy's are continuing with their tactics of “be retarded”, but a nice Flippy group has formed next to Licity's Pink Shit. I can see some more abominations up coming with them, because Flippy doesn't really seem to care what he fucks, as long as it has weird tentacles.



Pink Shit itself is going well, forming a nice colony.



Flippy continues in it's mission of raping other creatures, waltzing into Smooth Bastard's territory and mating with everything in sight.



The Flippy group near Pink Shit has once again disbanded. It seems that Flippy will mate with everything in sight but itself.



The Pink Shit colony itself continues to grow slowly. It seems that Pink Shit is winning, unless Angry Epileptic has produced something good--



OH SWEET MOTHER OF GOD

It looks like Angry Epileptic will consume everything in sight. It is the clear favourite here, people. Pink Shit is going well, but the sheer brute force of Angry Epileptic does not look like it can be stopped.



Smooth Bastard is having troubles of it's own, having to fight off a Flippy invasion, and Flippy does not seem interested in winning the game at all, but mating with as many possible species in the shortest amount of time.

Once again, Flippy has mated with another species: Pink Shit this time, producing this retard:





This zoomed right out picture of the competition shows the situation right now: Flippy spread across the map, fucking everywhere; Pink Shit slowly and surely forming a colony down the bottom, and Angry Epileptic pushing forward like the plague into Smooth Bastard territory. Smooth Bastard is being attacked by both Flippy AND Angry Epileptic. Will this be the end for Smooth Bastard?

Unless Smooth Bastard pulls out something big, it will be overrun.



It is chaos up in the north, ladies and gentleman. Angry Epileptic and Flippy wage a war of mating and eating, and Smooth Bastard is stuck in the middle, repeatedly raped by both sides of the war, like a wartime nurse. It is NOT looking good for Smooth Bastard.



Pink Shit in the south is just ignoring the above war, fucking peacefully.



Flippy seems to be taking control of the game now. Angry Epileptic is dwindling, Smooth Bastard is as good as dead, and Pink Shit is sitting down south, minding it's own business, but Flippy is expanding down there too, like a gigantic rape machine.



Flippy keeps on eating and eating, and he will not stop. Angry Epileptic has been stranded in the middle without food, Pink Shit is being overrun, and Smooth Bastard . . . well, this is what's left of Smooth Bastard:



But what's this?



This is a CRISIS, ladies and gentleman. Food is running out. That voracious fucker Flippy has eaten too much, and he has left more than half his own population stranded without food. Right now, it's the fastest who wins, as the game is now just a big race for food.



The future is not certain anymore, with all species in danger of dying out. Flippy's “fuck, fuck, fuck, eat, eat, eat” behaviour may have doomed everyone.

So who will win this final competition?



Flippy will, ladies and gentleman. Flippy will.

Flippy wins, barely. The field is littered with the results of interbreeding between the four species, like Mexicans in a racist simile, but no original example of Smooth Bastard, Pink Shit, or Angry Epileptic are present. Only a few Flippy's are alive, but a few is enough. Flippy has won.

* * *

So, Grunkie7 wins the first match. I'm going to PM you the final DNA of the winning Flippy's, in case it has changed or anything. I don't know, you can battle Flippy 1.0 against Flippy 2.0 and see which one wins, I guess, or if Flippy actually evolved at all.

There will be more matches, if there are competitors willing.

I'm fucking willing.

I haven't lold this hard in quite a while. Well done.

Will join if it doesn't require a retarded install or something retardedly retarded.

It doesn't. It works on Windows easily with just a download, On Linux with WINE easily, and I assume it works on Mac, but I haven't tried.

More people should join, yo.

Oh man. That had to have been the funniest thing I have seen in a long, long time. Looks like I need to refine Pink Shit... maybe some genetic engineering.

Congrats Grunkie!

My suggestion for improving creatures is making a new pool, finding a new dominant species, and pitting your creature (Pink Shit, in this case) against the new dominant one. That way, it will have to evolve to overcome the new dominant species.

Or even just stick a breeding pair of Pink Shit in an empty pool and let them go. They'll evolve to become faster, sleeker and I dunno, sexier.

That was brilliant! I'd like to have another go at this; time to pit my Angry Epileptic against the winner of my next pool.

Especially since I somehow sent the wrong version of Angry Epilleptic. I must have overwritten the file somehow.

Haha, I'm in

Originally Posted by Kiza

It doesn't. It works on Windows easily with just a download, On Linux with WINE easily, and I assume it works on Mac, but I haven't tried.

More people should join, yo.

I did mine on my mac.

That was pretty epic, Kiza. Poor smooth bastard, the wartime nurse :<

This game is addictive.

I like starting with a small population and watch them evolve. A large population is harder to keep track of.

Anyway! I love this.

I'm definitely in. Now begins the breeding of an elite competitor, starting from a selection of blobs that shake and run away from food.

Gosh this is hard.

My creatures have no sense of direction.

Just you wait... by tomorrow I'll have a depraved master of eating and fucking.

Argh, now these things are swimming around under my eyelids! Stupid tetris effect!

A dominant species is emerging!

Wow I wasn't expecting that much commentary, well done


I'm glad I will be remembered as the best gluttonous rape machine of the petri dish.

I am doing the last breeding of my freaky gene.

Starting off with 4 of my good genes in each corner of the pool, I see over time who grows faster.

It looks like that my first one breed, the one in the south is the best.

So far I have two winners of the "Totally Random" pool. Once I have four, I'm going to pit them against each other to find the ultimate competitor >: )

EDIT: IT'S A DRAGON

Ooookay!

We have 2 competitors for the next match! Hazel with Angry Epileptic 2.0, and Specialis with his own creature. Mrdeano sent me one, but then he withdrew it for some reason. So we still have 2 spots left. You can't go in this match, by the way, Grunkie, because you're in the Grand Final.

Send your little retarded swimming bastards in!

Ooh, you're ready for another match? Give me about 10 minutes and I'll PM you my top competitor

EDIT: Made my decision, Purple Swarmer is now in the competition.

EDIT 2: Whoops, forgot to include the name in the PM, but it's here, so...

Also, beware: since I have more experience and time, my next creatures will be nigh unstoppable

I am always ready for another match. PM your little critters any time, everyone.

The new match shall be played in about 10 hours, if we have four competitors by then.

Fuuuuuuuck.

I just tested out pojmaster's Purple Swarmer (one more spot in the next match by the way, people) and holy shit, do not fuck with this thing. ALSO, I tested out Angry Epileptic 2.0 and holy shit do not fuck with that dude either. And Specialis' monster also went very well in an empty pool, so we've got a competition on our hands, once we get our final competitor.

HOLD ON TO YOUR BALLS PEOPLE

I see what they mean about amusing mini-dramas. One of my creatures keeps taking the food that, let's call him creature 2 is about to eat. Then creature rapes creature 2 and steals his food again, repeating the process over and over again. Poor creature 2. They're not even the same species

Hmm, I can't seem to hone my creature at all now. They just multiply, make retarded babies, eat all the food, and then die of starvation over and over.
That and dozens would all try and attack the lone food pellet against the wall that none of them can reach and all die out .


Guess I'll have to count on flippy V.1 in the future.