So I've been pretty "obsessed" lately with lucid dreaming. I've done my reading up on every possible way to induce and I know exactly the methods to getting lucid and staying there. I've read into all of the spiritual aspects of Lucid Dreaming and read a lot of Stephen LaBerge's and Edgar Cayce's books. I draw on my hands every day to remind me to RC and stay aware. But... I got a little impatient-

I listened to a random "Lucid Dream" binaural beat that I found doing a quick search... just before falling asleep.

That morning, I had a nightmare. I haven't had a "true" nightmare in years. Yet, this was a semi-lucid hellish nightmare that made me fear sleep. The worst I've Ever had.

My entry is here: [All Alone]

I woke up crying for 10 minutes- I performed reality checks while praying that I was out of my dream and called my girlfriend, Alex, immediately.

Now I'm even more pressured to lucid dream- not only for personal development... or for spiritual, creative, and fun reasons... but to avoid me being stuck in this zombie-like, catatonic state, unAWARE, ever again. Not even in waking life. I mean for GOD'S SAKE- I didn't even realize there was anything menacing around me until that FREAK took a knife to my throat.

I've been practicing full-time awareness- where I would always be AWARE of my awareness. Fully conscious- 24/7. None of those moments of "What have I been doing for 20 minutes!?" and no more zoning out. I slip up constantly... most of the time even. But I feel I've improved a bit. I have a marking of an L and a D on each hand... and a spiral to make it more noticeable. Every time I see my hand, I think, "BECOME CONSCIOUS. STAY AWARE OF MY AWARENESS. IS THIS A DREAM?"

It so far has NOT carried over into any lucid dreams... but this doubled with the binaural beat again- I think I might stand a chance. In about an hour, I'll go to sleep listening to the SAME beat as before, while trying to maintain that constant awareness. Wish me luck. I'll post again as soon as I have the chance.