Was I lucid or did I just dream about it?

[UndefaulteD]

In my sleep, I was at my local supermarket--you know just walking--then suddenly I circle around an isle and I realize I'm dreaming. I don't know the details of how that came to pass; before that "movement" everything seems blurry. So I turn around and the day has turned to night and the place seems empty. And suddenly I realize I'm dreaming. Oh shit, I tell myself, I'm finally astral projecting, and I quickly look at my hands. They seem fine to me. Then I remember I should stare around me in glimpses and that's what I do, constantly looking at my hands every now and then to remain lucid. Then I say, yeah, I always wanted to mess around in a supermarket when no one is there, so I start eating some pastrami or something. Then I tell myself, screw that let's fly and I plow my body right into the air, but I fall down, which perplexes me because the last time I had a lucid dream I had flown like it was nothing. And suddenly I don't know if I'm astral projecting or lucid dreaming, then I look at my hands again and move to another isle where there are some weird things like a plate where cereals should be, then I find a wallet in a refrigerator with money, a credit card, and a lot of photos, and I can actually see a woman, a little girl, and her husband, all in separate photographs, except for the man, who looks like my dad. Then the dream gets weirder and I suddenly start looking for money inside the wallet, and I feel guilty about it and worried and I start planning if I should just max out the credit card or I should return it and then I remember I should look at my hands. And my eyes open and I'm in my room. And I realize that every time I looked at my hands I didn't actually stare at them, didn't even count fingers. It was more like a glance. This happened yesterday and I didn't actually intend to lucid dream or anything of that sort, so I don't know if I actually managed to be a little lucid or what. Can someone dream that he is lucid dreaming when he isn't actually lucid dreaming? I remember when I tried to fly and fell I sort of expected to fall, which indicates that I didn't really believe I could do it. But why not be able to do it if I was lucid dreaming? I feel like I was half-asleep-half-awake in that dream and the notion of astral projection kinda confused my consciousness and lost the chance to fully lucid dream. What do you think?

[ThreeCat]

I think your mind understood enough that your current experience was irregular, and it did feel that it was "astral projecting," so I would count this as a lucid dream. You did get trapped in a kind of unfortunate "mind web" of logic. Your logical mind will normally try to convince you that somehow, the experience you are having just isn't good enough. In LD this is especially problematic, bc it can convince you that you "really aren't dreaming" or that something "really isn't working" and so forth. So in LD just relax and let it be. You'll have more fun.

[UndefaulteD]

Yeah, I guess that makes sense. I also felt that the more I thought about thinks the less lucid I became. I should also mention that a mosquito bit me between jaw and neck. It's probably irrelevant but I kept thinking about Castaneda and that gnat he had mentioned. Not really looking for a reply on that; I just thought I should mentioned it. Our world is way too crazier than we dare to admit!