Thread: Your deconversion story?

you just generalized non atheists by saying we don't think for ourselves and are blind. spiritual seekers are truth seekers and think for themselves, thank you.

I didn't specifically comment on non-atheists. I know how it's easy to twist people's words and how you read in to it what you want. Fool.

So yeah, don't call me a hypocrite and learn to read what people actually write, not what you want to read.

seriously so many atheists here pop a blood vessel or two if you even suggest text book science doesn't have all the answers

WHO?

Let's have some examples and links to posts.

so you guys can thank yourselves for projecting this close minded view of atheists to me. Like I said, most people in my life have a religion or a spiritual view of reality. Most atheists I know, ARE YOU GUYS.

go on, give yourself a big round of applause

you don't like this point of view? look at yourselves and change the attitude you present to others on this forum with a different point of view.

Until you give me a link that backs up your point that "many" - not one or two, but many - atheists here blindly believe in science, I'm calling you on your bullshit.

I don't like the fact that you parade around a viewpoint and get defensive when anyone has the audacity to ask you to back it up with any actual evidence.

All the atheists in this topic have denied blind belief in anything, and that science can provide absolute answers. Try reading next time.

I've had pretty much the same story as all of you that grew up in the Bible belt. I think I've finally come to grips with the fact that I'm never going to tell my parents though. Last week at youth group we spent a half fucking hour as "prayer warriors" praying for my best friend who recently told everyone he was an atheist (lucky bastard), and he wasn't even that involved there with the group. Me on the other hand, I've been going there since I moved to North Carolina (encroaching upon 9 years), and have been way too damn active with them. I'm seriously afraid that if I ever came (lol) out then the entire youth group would come to my house, stuff me in the van, and lock me in the broom closet in the church until I accepted Christ again.

What sucks the most is I could have averted this whole situation. Nine years ago when we came here it was my idea to go to that damn church because some of my newer friends went there. Then once I deconverted (when I was 13) I think part of me knew that I wouldn't get out until I moved out for college, but I still held hope that I wouldn't have to stay that long.

Jesus, I'm so tired of this, and I've still got a good two years before I move out for college. If anyone is going through this same situation how do you deal with it? It's driving me fucking mad.

I suggest you tell them that you have a tiny explosive device implanted in your skull with the power to blow up 8 square blocks at the moment you desire...if they try to shuv you in the broom closet you will explode them.

Originally Posted by CatBus

I've had pretty much the same story as all of you that grew up in the Bible belt. I think I've finally come to grips with the fact that I'm never going to tell my parents though. Last week at youth group we spent a half fucking hour as "prayer warriors" praying for my best friend who recently told everyone he was an atheist (lucky bastard), and he wasn't even that involved there with the group. Me on the other hand, I've been going there since I moved to North Carolina (encroaching upon 9 years), and have been way too damn active with them. I'm seriously afraid that if I ever came (lol) out then the entire youth group would come to my house, stuff me in the van, and lock me in the broom closet in the church until I accepted Christ again.

What sucks the most is I could have averted this whole situation. Nine years ago when we came here it was my idea to go to that damn church because some of my newer friends went there. Then once I deconverted (when I was 13) I think part of me knew that I wouldn't get out until I moved out for college, but I still held hope that I wouldn't have to stay that long.

Jesus, I'm so tired of this, and I've still got a good two years before I move out for college. If anyone is going through this same situation how do you deal with it? It's driving me fucking mad.

Not as unlikely as you think, but others in your group might be in the exact same predicament you are, and are just as afraid to out themselves. The raging anti-theist in me wants you to be proud of who you are, but people have been beaten/killed for less so just be safe, whatever you decide.

Find different people to hang out when you would be with your prayer group, slowly see them less and less making excuses to avoid it at first like your sick or your cat died... let the excuses get more and more ridiculous until finally you tell them you converted to Islam.

My "deconversion" story, if you will, began long ago when I was just 5 years old. For as long as I can remember, I have been curious and inquisitive about things. But one of the most intriguing things I liked to think about was religion. I used to read my little bible for hours, just pouring through it and trying to learn as much as I could. This led me to the ten commandments, which in turn made me question my mother about why we went to church on Sunday, instead of the original Jewish Saturday. I actually convinced my mother that we should start going on Saturday instead, and we pretty much went to a different sect of Christianity. I slowly learned more about religion, and was dissatisfied with traditional Christianity. I wanted to know it all, and be able to know everything there ever was to know. I entered the world of comparative religion, and began to study different faiths and religious systems.

I delved into other philosophies, and compared to them Christianity, which was perceived in my mind to be the original religion, and that all other faiths branched out from it after the Flood. Then, I realized I knew little about the Flood itself. Actually, I knew relatively little about how Christianity connected with actual history. So I picked up a history book and started to learn. My mother got me video tapes of a man named Kent Hovind, and I took in whatever he spat out and tried to see where it fit in my little worldview. I started to form a pseudo-scientific hodgepodge of religion, and tried to fit the Creation, Garden of Eden, Flood, and other mythical events inside of actual history. I started to think about the Grigori and Nephilim mentioned in the non-canonical texts.

I began to blur the lines between the traditional and unorthodox, and tried to see what was the truth out of the lies. But whatever I was presented with I scrutinized with a careful eye, and even compared it with my new-found knowledge in science and history. I was skeptical of everything and anything I learned, especially concepts that went against fundamentalist Christianity (big bang theory, plate tectonics, evolution, etc.) I then started to turn full circle, and then found myself scrutinizing the traditional stories and concepts in the Bible. The Flood was the first to go, and then it was Lucifer's Rebellion, then it was the Garden of Eden, and then...I collapsed entirely. I felt like I was both liberated from the shackles of deception, but I also felt like I had been thrown into a cold and empty room with no escape. I argued against the existence of God Himself, and even found myself creating the logical arguments of the philosophers of old in my mind on my spare time! I questioned His power, wisdom, love for humanity, etc etc. I tried to break God and His stories and fit them into a little box that I would lock up and mark with "childhood lies".

I had come out of my delusion, only to see that reality was more horrifying than I could ever imagine. Atheists didn't believe in an afterlife...did they? I felt like killing myself, and felt there was no purpose to anything, because after I'm gone nothing I did would matter. But a little glimmer of light inside of me told me to give something a purpose. The desire to keep going. I forgot about suicide and even told my relatives that I had become an atheist. Of course, they became negative towards me, and even tried to convert me back to theism. Their efforts were futile, because I had formed dozens of arguments that would shatter whatever cliche propaganda techniques they were given in Sunday School to keep onto their faith. But then, my dad gave me a long and thorough talk that made me wonder...maybe I was wrong? In that moment I felt like I wanted...no, I NEEDED religion.

But then I stepped back and saw what the problem was: I was being too critical. I started to rethink my position on certain things. I wondered about other religions again, and then started to see the same pattern in them that Christianity oh so popularly displayed. So I gave everything a think-over, and then became an agnostic. I realized there could be something beyond, but till then I'll choose to not think about it. After all, the universe is infinite, and if something loving and caring towards humanity is out there, I'd be happy to get a call from it. I left the ball in God's court long ago, and I know that if He really is real, I get a free ticket to Heaven because it would be irrational for me to go to hell without evidence FOR His existence. So, the ball is still in the Divine's Court.

Pretty much, I came here.
Rents grew me up in a Southern Baptist church, and I believed all the misconceptions about evolution that godly people KNOW to be true.
Started coming to this site, tried to keep an open mind, and did my own research. Slowly started to come to the agnostic/atheist side.

Originally Posted by Sandform

I suggest you tell them that you have a tiny explosive device implanted in your skull with the power to blow up 8 square blocks at the moment you desire...if they try to shuv you in the broom closet you will explode them.

It's possible, but I have no sadly I have no Ammonium Nitrate at my disposal.

Originally Posted by Omnius Deus

Find different people to hang out when you would be with your prayer group, slowly see them less and less making excuses to avoid it at first like your sick or your cat died... let the excuses get more and more ridiculous until finally you tell them you converted to Islam.

I've slowly been doing this, recently I've stopped going to the prayer circle and started hanging out with some way cooler people. Luckily my schedule makes it almost impossible to make it to the prayer circle, so I got off easy on that one. As for Wednesday and Sunday services, I've been sick for the last couple, so I'll probably have to go for the next few weeks. I'm liking the Islam angle though, with how ignorant most of the people I know are, they'll probably think I'll try to blow them up if they say anything that contradicts my beliefs

Originally Posted by CatBus

I'm liking the Islam angle though, with how ignorant most of the people I know are, they'll probably think I'll try to blow them up if they say anything that contradicts my beliefs

Yes the concept of Muslimism has great teachings to give us all.

I stopped believing when I starting smoking pot. Naturally my thoughts became 'freeer' I became more open, and more gullible (in the right way). That is, I like to reject old ideas, and I am attracted to the unorthodox ones.

Stories in this thread are exactly why I am so against 7-day fundamentalism, crazy dogmatic statements condemning everything that isn't viewed as totally normal, (D&D, LDing, etc.) and general hypocracy.

So many people turn away from a religion because it is limiting on parts of people's lives that is nowhere in the religous texts, but loose inferences that they think are fact because they were smart enough to 'find it.'

And of course, the people that say you can't be a Christian and believe in evolution or the big bang.

It's like the Catholic church back in the day... advocating that the world is flat because thier accepted translation said 'the four corners of the Earth.'

Anyway, if I didn't know that evolution and Christianity could be compatible and that alot of Christian's didn't impose pointless rules 'not' in the Bible on people for either a power trip or dogma, I may be sharing a 'deconversion' story as it has been called and argued about.

(As far as I've known, Atheism is saying 'don't know, but lean more towards no God' whilst agnosticism says 'don't know, but lean more towards some higher power/diety(ies.))

Originally Posted by spockman

Anyway, if I didn't know that evolution and Christianity could be compatible and that alot of Christian's didn't impose pointless rules 'not' in the Bible on people for either a power trip or dogma, I may be sharing a 'deconversion' story as it has been called and argued about.

(As far as I've known, Atheism is saying 'don't know, but lean more towards no God' whilst agnosticism says 'don't know, but lean more towards some higher power/diety(ies.))

Well if you choose to look at the bible in a more metaphoric way, or just ignore the old testament (claiming that animals were made in days/the world is about 1 million times younger then scientists say(besides all the awful things in Leviticus)). But for all you know the whole bible and god could just be one big metaphor, and if you ignore the old testament you've got to give reason to it, and I haven't heard many convincing arguments, only such as this book was only speaking to the Jewish people.

Atheist is leaning toward no god, agnosticism is the belief that there is not enough clues in the universe to say one way or the other really, you can be both, I am.

Originally Posted by spockman

(As far as I've known, Atheism is saying 'don't know, but lean more towards no God' whilst agnosticism says 'don't know, but lean more towards some higher power/diety(ies.))

Originally Posted by LucidDreamGod

Atheist is leaning toward no god, agnosticism is the belief that there is not enough clues in the universe to say one way or the other really, you can be both, I am.

I would like to clear up what the words atheist and agnostic mean.

Agnostic means you make no claims about the existence or non-existence of a diety. An agnostic does not necessarily "lean more towards a higher power/diety."

An Atheist is an agnostic, BUT it gives one extra definition. An atheist can take the position that a diety does not exist, and agnostic can not. An agnostic can make claims as to what they believe, as in they do not believe that it is true, but only an Atheist can make the claim that they believe the claim is, in fact, false.

Agnostic - can't claim yes, and can't claim no, on whatever it is they are claiming agnosticism towards. (Ex: I am an agnostic on whether SOME sort of diety exists, I am an ATHEIST when it comes to the claims of the specified dieties that have been presented to me.)

Atheist - Can not claim yes, CAN claim no.

Okay, thanks for clearing that up Sandform. As for this statement...

Well if you choose to look at the bible in a more metaphoric way, or just ignore the old testament (claiming that animals were made in days/the world is about 1 million times younger then scientists say(besides all the awful things in Leviticus)). But for all you know the whole bible and god could just be one big metaphor, and if you ignore the old testament you've got to give reason to it, and I haven't heard many convincing arguments, only such as this book was only speaking to the Jewish people.

I disagree since I'm not looking at the Bible as a metaphor, I'm looking at the Bible in Hebrew where the word Yom is used and not day. Meaning day or age or undefined time period.

As far as I know, I'm probably more non-religious. My mum however, is a Christian, and dislikes the idea of me not believing in God and all that crap. I only believe in certain aspects of religion. Such as the concept of heaven, and that we are all mortals, bound to the earth as a test, to see if we are worthy to enter the immortality of the afterlife, where we shall spend eternity. My mum also dislikes the fact that I like to study other religions, like Judaism, Islam, Buddhism etc, because she thinks I may be turning to a different religion. But to be direct, I have enough problems in my life to have to obey whatever some enormous book tells me to do, or a god, philosopher or prophet.

I did, when I was younger, was raised as a Christian in a Baptist Church. My life turned sour eventually, after the break-up of my parents, and my plummet down in social status at my school, and I turned independant, making my own decisions.

Originally Posted by spockman

Okay, thanks for clearing that up Sandform. As for this statement...



I disagree since I'm not looking at the Bible as a metaphor, I'm looking at the Bible in Hebrew where the word Yom is used and not day. Meaning day or age or undefined time period.

If it did not take place over days then why seven ages? Seems like it would just be one, since they're undefined to start with...

Christmas Eve. Stood at the back of a church.

Watching a drunk man singing a Christmas carol with tears running down his face just made me depressed. Also logical reasons.

But mostly because drunk man.

Originally Posted by Siиdяed

Christmas Eve. Stood at the back of a church.

Watching a drunk man singing a Christmas carol with tears running down his face just made me depressed. Also logical reasons.

But mostly because drunk man.

She said my name is christmas Carol I was born on christmas eve.
I don't know where my daddy is and mommy had to leave.
The song sontinues from there.

Originally Posted by Sandform

She said my name is christmas Carol I was born on christmas eve.
I don't know where my daddy is and mommy had to leave.
The song sontinues from there.

Wat.

The song sontinues from there.

Oh. Thanks, Grod. ;]

Originally Posted by Siиdяed

Christmas Eve. Stood at the back of a church.

Watching a drunk man singing a Christmas carol with tears running down his face just made me depressed. Also logical reasons.

But mostly because drunk man.

Don't know why, but that kinda made me feel depressed slightly, just reading it.

Originally Posted by Everlong

Don't know why, but that kinda made me feel depressed slightly, just reading it.

Do you know anyone who might like a christmas Carol to take home?