Thread: "Don't strangle the serpent"

I've seen this guy before. I'm pretty sure he's not serious.

Wow you're right. I just realized that upon watching more of his videos. There goes the thread :O

Nonetheless, this satirical video does illustrate quite well (almost too well) how many religious people feel toward this subject.

EDIT: Watching more of his videos, he does a good job of pointing out the silliness of all religion.

I'm subscribed to EdwardCurrent, he's not serious.

Look at the tags for that video...

masturbation abstinence bible christianity atheist jesus christ god religion prayer satire parody spoof edward current

Go on his page...

My religion videos are comedies. I am not a Christian.

Originally Posted by Elis D.

I'm subscribed to EdwardCurrent, he's not serious.

Look at the tags for that video...


Go on his page...

Originally Posted by Black_Eagle

Wow you're right. I just realized that upon watching more of his videos. There goes the thread :O

Nonetheless, this satirical video does illustrate quite well (almost too well) how many religious people feel toward this subject.

EDIT: Watching more of his videos, he does a good job of pointing out the silliness of all religion.

.

Edwardcurrent is hilarious! Check out one of his videos called "I built a prayer amplifier" - it had me laughing out loud until I cried.

I love his depiction of the disturbing man in denial

Do you think it's okay if you masturbate to thoughts of Jesus?

!!!!!!!!!!!

haha...

The masturbation thing-- the reason why a lot of religions promote abstinence is because there is a lot of energy in semen, and when it's released your energy flows downwards rather than upwards towards heaven (upper chakras). Plus masturbation gives you acne and makes you unsymmetrical!

Sperm in daoist sexual practice is pure jing. Jing is cultivated into chi, and chi is cultivated into shen.

Masturbation drains your batteries!

Originally Posted by Needcatscan

Do you think it's okay if you masturbate to thoughts of Jesus?

I would assume so yes. No greater way to show your love to him.

Originally Posted by sephiroth clock

haha...

The masturbation thing-- the reason why a lot of religions promote abstinence is because there is a lot of energy in semen, and when it's released your energy flows downwards rather than upwards towards heaven (upper chakras). Plus masturbation gives you acne and makes you unsymmetrical!

Sperm in daoist sexual practice is pure jing. Jing is cultivated into chi, and chi is cultivated into shen.

Masturbation drains your batteries!

No, they discourage masturbation because of a misinterpreted passage in the bible.

It does not 'cause acne http://acne.about.com/od/acnefaqs/f/sexualityacne.htm.

It does not cause asymmetry, all human faces and bodies are asymmetric. We are not designed to be symmetric, our genes dictate how symmetric we are. How do I know this? Because I just looked up all those theories of masturbation causing asymmetry. They said the side that you masturbate on shrinks. That's funny, considering I masturbate with my right and also considering the right side of my body is bigger than my left. Not by all that much, but still. Does this mean I'm saving my beauty by masturbating as it would have been much larger? Not only that, but pretty much all males masturbate regularly, both highly asymmetric and very lowly asymmetric.

Note: Also, if these myths were real, then sex would be just as bad if not worse for your health.

Originally Posted by Black_Eagle

No, they discourage masturbation because of a misinterpreted passage in the bible.

It does not 'cause acne http://acne.about.com/od/acnefaqs/f/sexualityacne.htm.

It does not cause asymmetry, all human faces and bodies are asymmetric. We are not designed to be symmetric, our genes dictate how symmetric we are. How do I know this? Because I just looked up all those theories of masturbation causing asymmetry. They said the side that you masturbate on shrinks. That's funny, considering I masturbate with my right and also considering the right side of my body is bigger than my left. Not by all that much, but still. Does this mean I'm saving my beauty by masturbating as it would have been much larger? Not only that, but pretty much all males masturbate regularly, both highly asymmetric and very lowly asymmetric.

Note: Also, if these myths were real, then sex would be just as bad if not worse for your health.

Originally Posted by Black_Eagle

No, they discourage masturbation because of a misinterpreted passage in the bible.

It does not 'cause acne http://acne.about.com/od/acnefaqs/f/sexualityacne.htm.

It does not cause asymmetry, all human faces and bodies are asymmetric. We are not designed to be symmetric, our genes dictate how symmetric we are. How do I know this? Because I just looked up all those theories of masturbation causing asymmetry. They said the side that you masturbate on shrinks. That's funny, considering I masturbate with my right and also considering the right side of my body is bigger than my left. Not by all that much, but still. Does this mean I'm saving my beauty by masturbating as it would have been much larger? Not only that, but pretty much all males masturbate regularly, both highly asymmetric and very lowly asymmetric.

Note: Also, if these myths were real, then sex would be just as bad if not worse for your health.

hmm, I would just recommend being celibate for any length of time (a month would be good) and see if you notice any benefits--there are definitely physical effects is what I have noticed. I started noticing that I was gaining weight again--I've been underweight a lot--and gaining muscle mass. Then I looked up and read that body builders generally agree they gain more muscle when they don't masturbate.

It's also common practice for coaches to tell their athletes to be celibate for at least three days before a competition.

There is just more energy, more intensity for other things, the energy has to be released.

About the unsymmetrical thing, I was kinda joking, I'm not really sure what I think about that. But I do think it can cause acne. There have been too many anecdotal reports of this, and we've now learned that it is because masturbation releases histamines (swelling).

And celibacy is not just a christian thing, all major religions impose some kind of celibacy so I would not just attribute it misinterpretation of the bible. The bible is pretty explicit. I think the misinterpretation comes from not understanding the real reasons why certain rules are imposed or suggested.

Anyways I'm not against masturbation, but I do think it drains you.

Originally Posted by sephiroth clock

Anyways I'm not against masturbation, but I do think it drains you.

It doesn't drain you, it just alters levels of certain neurotransmitters in the hypothalamus that affect motivation. When you're horny, the body burns through sugar and fat faster because cavemen who hadn't "spread their seed" in a few days needed to get on it if they wanted to make offspring. How did Shakespeare put it? The starving hawk hunts better, or something.

Originally Posted by drewmandan

It doesn't drain you, it just alters levels of certain neurotransmitters in the hypothalamus that affect motivation. When you're horny, the body burns through sugar and fat faster because cavemen who hadn't "spread their seed" in a few days needed to get on it if they wanted to make offspring. How did Shakespeare put it? The starving hawk hunts better, or something.

that's really interesting, I hadn't heard that before. I do think it points to the fact that there are more physical affects than we realize.

Starving hawk hunts better. I think the benefit of celibacy is redirecting that extra intensity for "spreading your seed" into other places.

But anyways, I think the best way to find out is to try it for yourself and see if you notice any benefits.

What if you're inverted while masturbating? Does your energy still flow in the wrong direction?

Boy, he got you! Seriously? You couldn't tell that was a joke?

Originally Posted by Xaqaria

Boy, he got you! Seriously? You couldn't tell that was a joke?

Well, like I said, I have encountered many Christians who say things very similar to him. As ridiculous as it sounded, when I saw the titles of his other videos, I thought he was serious.