Twoshadows

1-26-09

Lucid fragment:

I was laying in bed and looking over at my nightstand and watching this very large black widow spider. It was about 6 inches long. I remember knowing that it was a dream and looking at it closely and thinking something like, "Wow...look at that detail. It's amazing that my mind can come up with that kind of detail. I couldn't draw that in real life--I wouldn't know exactly where to draw in the legs and the cephalothorax --so how can my mind create it so perfectly.

Then I saw two beetles walk across my nightstand. I wondered if the spider would try to catch them. As soon as I thought this the black widow pounced on one of them and started to suck it dry.

I must have been quite lucid or else I would have felt quite creeped out by all of this.

3-20-08


A Lucid Dream.

I don't remember where the dream started, but I was walking across the street toward my mom's house. I looked on the ground and saw a scorpion. My first thought was to go grab my camera. Then I saw a second scorpion.

I looked and saw that they were coming from this box. I looked in the box and then saw a fat Black Widow crawl out. I continued to watch with a mixture of fascination and horror, as dozens of scorpions and BWs slowly climbed out of the box and onto the dirt driveway where I was standing.

Something about this scene made me question my state. At first I dismissed the idea that I was dreaming because this was real. I know what dreams feel like and what reality feels like. This was simply too real to be a dream.

But at the same time, I remembered how frustrated I had been at myself lately for missing so many obvious dream signs. And that if I later found out that this was a dream, and that I missed the perfect opportunity to become lucid, I would really be mad at myself.

So as I walked again twoard my mom's house, I jumped into the air to see if I could fly. I went up and came right back down. I felt silly for trying. This was reality. But I decided to give it one more try. I jumped out and kicked myself forward....and I totally surprised myself when I continued to glide ahead in the air.

I was thrilled that I was actually dreaming when I was so sure that I wasn't. I hadn't been expecting the chance to have this experience. I was extremely thankful that I hadn't given up.

I started to fly. The land behind my mom's house dropped off and I was flying high over a valley far below.

All of a sudden the dream began to fade. I had the attitude of, "Don't you dare..."

I reached out and rubbed my hands on my arms like I did in the last LD. I noticed the same way of how my hands left like they were part of my physical body, but yet I could move them around my body whith out bumping into my sleeping body on the bed.

The hand rubbing did the trick.

There is a fuzzy place here that I don't remember what I did. I think I might have flown in a store.

But at some point I remembered that I needed to try some tasks, I remembered that I told Nothin7 that I would try some of his experiments. I tried to remember what they were.

I decided that the first one was to write a sentence. I was outside of a house. I decided to fly inside. I landed by a table and looked until I found a pen. I then found a paper. It was written on, but had spaces around the edges. I knew I didn't need much room to write a sentence, so this paper would work good enough for me. I carefully wrote, "I NEED TO WRITE A SENTENCE FOR NOTHING7." I was actually a little surprised that it was easy to do and that I had no trouble at all doing it. It wasn't until later in retrospect that I realized I used all caps to write it, and I never wirte in caps these days (I went through a stage as a teenager when I did. Maybe this is significant because I often go back to being a teen in my dreams.)


I then tried to remember the next thin I was supposed to do. I then remembered something about humming a song that I made up. I tried coming up with a little tune. I didn't do as well on this one becasue I often couldn't quite get the notes I was trying for, so then whole thing sounded off and out of tune. But I feel that I was able to do it somewhat. As I went outside again I continued to hum and ended up humming a melody that I thought I knew from real life. But now, in retrospect, I think it is something I was continuing to make up.

I then remembered that I needed to find a painting to look at. I was a little shed nearby that I knew was actually a shop. I supposedly knew the lady that ran the shop. I felt sure that I could find a picture inside the shop.

I went in. The walls were covered with items for sale--things like dream catchers and other ornaments and trinkets. But I did see a picture. It was actually a sand painting. It was several shades of earth tones. I saw that it was a desert scene with hills and cliffs. I felt that I was able to understand the picture was of.

I continued to look. I saw more pictures. The next two were water colors. They were a still life of a chemistry set...flasks and beakers...all stacked into a tower. There were two pictures in this set, obviously done by the same artist.

I then looked up and saw a large picture. It was actually made out of a sheet of metal and pounded into a 3D picture. It was a snow scene with a barn. I reached out to touch it. I felt the shiny cold surface of silver.

Mrs. Moore was now standing beside me. I understood that this was her store. She made a comment that that picture was her favorite too.

Seeing Mrs. moore, I decided that I would have her try the experiment. I asked her if she would be willing to write out a sentence for me.

But before she could I was suddenly awake.

Old LD from 10-22-07

I forgot to add this one from a few weeks ago. It wasn't a long one, but it had a lucid moment. I think I'll add it here because I think every moment of lucidity should be accounted for.


Dreams:

I had an interesting stretch of dreams this morning after a WBTB. I even had a lucid moment.


In the dream I was back with my sister that has cancer. [Ususally when I dream about "my sister" I'm talking about my younger sister. My older sister doesn't show up as often.] We were in a little room that was supposed to be in her new-ish house.

We were looking through all these pictures and reminiscing. Then my sister pulled out a large picture and say, "Hey, you've never seen this one yet , have you?" The picture was of myself with her 14 year old son. In the picture he looked more grown up. It was a very flattering picture of us. We both look like we could be models.

I then pulled out a box that not only had pictures but a pair of my sister's socks. The socks were a pinkish tan color with chocolate brown stripes. I told her how cute they were. Then I remembered that they were similar to a pair of socks that she had supposed gotten me for Christmas last year. I figured she had gotten them at the same place.

Then my mom and other sister were there too looking through these boxes with us.

The next thing that I remember is walking through her kitchen and seeing the little black boy there. He was about 3 years old . At first I can't figure out why he is there. But then I remembered that she babysat for a few kids.

I reached out and try to hug this little boy, but he wanted nothing to do with me. I then looked over and see two little black girls. I also try to talk with them and be friendly, but they both walked away from me. I felt bad.


There seems to be a transition here. I think this is still part of the same dream, though.

I was walking though a college campus with a preschool group. One of the little girls was Japanese. She seemed to like me and let me pick her up. We somehow got a little behind the others, so I finally had to run to try to catch up. At one point I tripped and we rolled on the grass. Neither of us were hurt at all. I got up and felt like something was missing, but couldn't figure out what.

I looked a ways ahead and saw the last of the preschool goup head into the store/restaurant. I finally caught up and walked in. The group was now gone. I didn't have the little girl anymore. The lady inside asked me if I wanted any of the free lunch they had been serving to the preschool group. I said, "Sure".

It was then I realized that my purse was missing. I started to panic. I had lost it on the college campus. I knew that it was very unlikely that I would ever see it again. I started telling the lady I was with how I had lost it. She was sympathizing with me.

Then I remember saying, "You know, I think it's going to be okay. When I wake up my purse will be there. It's not really gone. This has happened to me before, and when I woke up the purse was there. I just need to try and stop worrying about it now."

Then I have no idea what happened next. I do know lucidity ended (if it was ever really there to begin with. Even though I was saying that, I never had that "Ah ha, I'm dreaming" moment. This is the first time I can think of there I made reference to myself dreaming with out truly becoming lucid. )


I then remember being in my basement. There was a crack in the wall and my cat was watching some silverfish bugs come out of the crack. She was swatting her paw at them.

I really think something is missing from my memory here. But the next thing I remember is being attacked by these large metal bugs. They were black and about a foot across. one looked like a spider and the other a scorpion.

I was upstairs at this point and I ran down into the basement. I frantically started looking for a hammer or something to smash them with. All I could find were a pair of roller blades. I picked one one of them and when the bugs came down the stairs I started smashing them with the roller blade.

Amazingly they both just fell apart like they were cheap toys. I then ran my hands through the pile of pieces. I suddenly thought about movies that I had seen. I figured it was a very good idea to put the pieces in separate bags to dispose of them, just in case they all came together and came to life again.

Then my alarm went off...

At this moment I'm only remembering two dream fragments.

1. I am being chased by a wolf into a river.

2. I see Clair (who I used to work with) eating little maggot-like bugs. It was super gross.

I don't remember what I was doing in the dream, but I had this feeling "Well, this is just a dream, anyway, so I might as well try something interesting."

I was thinking about doing a Task of the Month, but for some reason I thought the Task was to "Eat a Bug".

I started to fly low to the ground and very slow. I saw some rocks. I picked a medium sized one up and looked under it to see what bugs I could find. Under this rock I saw several large long legged ants. I thought about picking one up. But suddenly the thought of those long hairy-ish legs moving on my tongue have me the heebie jeebies. So I moved on.

I wondered what kind of bug would be less creepy to eat. I thought about trying to find a ladybug. They didn't have long legs. They bodies were small and compact. As soon as I thought that I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. It was a ladybug. What luck. But as I looked at it scurrying along I just couldn't bring myself to eat it.

I then looked over to some grass to the left of where I was still hovering. I saw a large sow bug crawling up a long blade of grass. I reached to grab it, but again, the thought of actually putting that thing in my mouth just made me shudder. I decided that I just couldn't do it.

And that is all I remember from that dream. I am a little surprised at how squimish I was in the dream about eating bugs. I mean, I knew it was just a dream. It should have been easy. Heck, I've even done it in real life from being dared. I know it's in me. Oh well. It wasn't really a Task anyway.