Thread: This is getting out of control...

I've been broken up with my ex boyfriend for almost 10 months now, after a horrible break up. We were together for almost 2 years and broke up a few days before our 2nd year anniversary. After he broke up with me, we had no contact whatsoever and it's been that way for the past 10 months. A month after we broke up, I found out that he had been cheating on me for the last 2 months of our relationship and had started dating that girl a couple weeks after he broke up with me. Right after our break up, I had dreams about him every night. We'd either get back together in my dreams or we'd be fighting. Then, the dreams stopped because I started to hate him after I found out abotu the other girl. Now, I feel like I'm a little more at peace with everything and I don't hate him anymorea nd I'm not even angry. But for the past 2 weeks, these dreams have come back. Every night, I'll either have a dream of him and I being back together. Everything that's happened between us has still happened in my dreams, but we've moved past it all and are back to how thingsu sed to be.
Or
I'll have dreams of his step mother and I (who used to love me, but now hates me for no apparent reason. Keep in mind, the rest of the family still loves me because they know what he did to me) are the best of friends and hanging out .... and he's in the backgroubd of my dreams fighting with his girlfriend or just watching me.
I need to find a way to get him out of my head. It's just hurting me more.

And last night was the weirdest dream of all.
I'm at his house, wearing a red silky dress, red head bank (i know it's a headband because I keep moving it around and stop it from falling off during the entire dream), red shoes, and carrying a red purse. He is nowhehre in my dream, but my mother (who passed away almost 2 years ago) is in it at his house with me...and so are all of his family who still have a really close relationship with me. They're all helping me get ready for a dance at the high school. I remember grabbing my black jacket and then my ex's cousin, who is my best friend, walked out with me to the car. But for some reason she's just in a t-shirt and jeans . In my dream, she is already graduated even though her and I are in the same grade. Anyways, I'm driving the car and she is in the pasenger seat and once we're on the road, we're driving through my hometown in Nebraska (keep in mind that my ex lives in Colorado and that's where I graduated high school) and I miss the turn to go to my old high school and I end up driving us completely out of town, but then I realize what I'm doing and I turn back. Once I'm at the dance, I'm by myself in the middle of the dance floor and our song, "My best friend" by Tim McGraw comes on and I start to cry and suddenly I am sitting in a park in the snow by myself and I feel frozen and then I wake up.

The song part is weird because I haven't listend to that song since we broke up. I just can't and won't even try because I know I'll start crying if I hear it. But I could hear it plain as day in my dream, word for word.


Please help me understand this. These dreams have been going on for a little over 2 weeks now. And each day when I wake up, I feel really sad over him, which I haven't really felt in months. And it makes me really miss our relationship and who he used to be.