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    • ruesia's Avatar
      03-20-2017, 01:48 PM
      night of March 19 I was visiting a family. They were either distant relatives or family friends. I knew them but not well. I stayed for a night....
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    Recent Entries

    Those aren't fireworks

    by ruesia on 03-20-2017 at 01:48 PM
    night of March 19

    I was visiting a family. They were either distant relatives or family friends. I knew them but not well. I stayed for a night. The home was out in a desert basin. Flat as far as the eye could see with a range of mountains in th distance. Their own little oasis. They had a large home for a large family. A few children or maybe grandchildren were there. At one point they showed me their basement downstairs. It was their play area-- for reading or board games and other fun. The kids would take their iPads and laptops down there to play as well.

    The next morning I was getting ready to leave. I was sad about going. They asked if I wanted to eat some ice cream before I left. Then joked it was hours to the closest ice cream shop and they didn't have any there. They also seemed reluctant to have me go. We were standing out by my rental car. The mother said something about a realtor or someone coming to look at the house. Someone of authority. Not exactly welcome.

    About that time we heard an engine whining in the distance. Really being pushed. Sound carried across the flat land. We all looked at each other a bit puzzled. It was around that time we heard what sounded like a canon going off. We saw 10-15 trails go in to the sky. It was early morning or dusk-- the sky was relatively dark. These red trails like fireworks streaked up in to th sky. And then in the distance-- hundreds of miles, we saw a bright orange cloud lift from the ground. It was mushroom shaped. And the mood changed dramatically. And the whine of that engine in the distance was more ominous.

    About that time one of the red dots in the sky impacted near the mountain range and we saw the cloud racing acrossed the desert. "Get inside!" Screeched the father and we all ran toward the door. I don't remember how, but next thing I knew we were inside holding lanterns and climbing down in to the basement. In case the lights went out.

    I was with the young kids and ushering them in, cooing and promising it would be alright. And then we waited. The kids realized first that the internet was down. We hadn't even heard anything.

    We sat down in the basement and wondered what it was like upstairs. Eventually we opened the door and looked out. The house was dark. With nightfall. But there was an orange glow coming from outside. Several windows were broken and there were holes in the curtains covering them. It was like glowing embers lit the night sky. We then wondered what happened to the person in the vehicle coming and heard a voice from the couch say "I'm right here".

    Everything was covered in soot and ash and outside the world was orange and burned.
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    Shadow people?

    by ruesia on 02-10-2017 at 03:38 PM
    this wasn't a dream but it also was--- I kept seeing my dream after waking or feeling like I was awake

    I heard this voice whisper "Hhhheeeyyyyyy". A younger mans voice. Low tone. Not a whisper but low. And I opened my eyes and saw someone sitting at the foot of my bed. Just a shadow- a silhouette. And my own gasp is what scared me most, it made it feel real. I remember feeling the air coming in to my lungs. And then I ducked below my covers for about 5 seconds before I turned on my lamp. But no one was there.

    My heart rate was over 110. Definitely gave me a scare. Never had that happen-- seeing things when awake.
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    Tide pools

    by ruesia on 12-03-2016 at 01:30 PM
    Night of 12/2/16. One of several dreams

    I'm walking out toward the ocean. Somewhere unfamiliar. I have to cross a narrow swinging bridge to get to the beach. It is sunny out with a few lazy clouds. When I reach the other side to descend I realize the stairs have no railing. A young man on the other side is coming up with his friend and staring uncertainly at the bridge swaying. I say something like "If you made it up those stairs behind you this bridge is nothing". He still seemed skeptical. I realize I am wearing a dress and consider how I'm going to make it down the stairs. Several steps have crumbled away over time so it will require much balance and some jumping. Beneath the stairs are several young men. Beach goers. Regulars. They have a stereo and are painting. Or building with sand. Some artistic folley. I realize I can actually climb down from the top step and land in the sand so I do that more gracefully than leaping down the whole stair case.

    When I land I realize the young men are putting on a performance of sorts. I duck and hide behind them for a second then skirt around toward the sea and the pier. And there are the tide pools. For which this area is famous. And there are many people in the pools. They are in a cavern of sorts. Just dim light flowing through here and there. And more one enormous pool that is shallow and full of strange flora and fauna. I start across the pool. I have no shoes. I step on a sea urchin but it doesn't phase me. I'm running now and loving it. People look up at me but don't stop what they're doing.

    I play in the pools. Seeing the animals and looking at the plants. It is around this time I realize it has started to get dark. And the rule is not to be in the pools at night. Not because of the tide but because of the animals. I'm quickly making my way back toward the staircase and a group of small prey animals run by. They skitter in to the brush as a light shines from behind me. I follow suit and leap in the brush. Hunters brace the night. Poachers rather. I am lying in the grass when I see a big cat-- perhaps a lion? Coming up from behind us. It is looking at one of the prey animals and I am scared but also not willing to distract it so it kills me. It pounces and as it does I jerk and it turns its attention to me.
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    I can't lose him

    by ruesia on 10-19-2016 at 07:10 PM
    Had this dream last week and didn't document. only remember fragments.

    I am with copper and his coworkers and we are walking in a desert. it is hot. and we have been walking for awhile. there are about 4-5 of us. Im not quite sure why I am with him. he seems to be on duty. they are working. in their uniforms. and we get to this cage of sorts. it is surrounded by chainlink and there are vines everywhere (almost like grape vines) and there is a wooden structure. the roof is sagging. and we have to go through. get past this. because there is no other way than through. and so I seem to be the smallest-- maybe that is why I am there. the shortest, that is. and so they think I can fit over the roof and climb over and open the door. because it is blocked from them going through. so they hoist me up and I break through the vines and through the rafters and I am walking up above them all. and then -- I don't know. is it a bomb? is it just the structure? but it all explodes. it caves in. implodes, may be a better word. and I am knocked out. I guess. because when I wake up and I am next to what was the structure and hear a helicopter and I see people going through the rubble and somehow I know its copper theyre pulling out. and I see them pull him in to the cage they have under the helicopter and start hoisting it up and I run over and see the paramedic or fireman or whoever he is and he has tears in his eyes and I just stare at him and he screams above the noise and the dust "we don't know...we don't know if he is going to make it". and I feel my stomach drop. and the paramedic jumps on the cage. I don't know what to do or say. I see the helicopter reel him in and then it speeds off.

    and then I am at an abandoned mall of sorts. its quiet. no one there. maybe its just closed. the marble-style floors and benches. very white. walls are white. floors are white. its very clean. plants. fancy. maybe even a hotel style lobby.

    and we are all waiting. and I see one of coppers coworkers. he was fine. and ask him if he knows anything. and he says they're still working. still trying. and I just don't know what to say or do. I don't know why im not there. but I get the feeling its because of the nature of that mission. and I just rock back and forth and think how im going to live without copper. how I am going to cope with losing him. how I cant fathom this. how I have no way to handle this. my mind is full and my mouth is cotton and I am rocking and trying to act like im ok. like ive got this. but inside I am lost. I am absolutely crushed. I didn't get to say goodbye. I cant lose him.
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    The Death Chambers

    by ruesia on 10-19-2016 at 06:59 PM
    night of 10/18/16

    I waited to long to log so now there are just wisps of information....

    ----

    I am in a neutral colored room. Tans and creams and browns. There is a flat, cushioned table in the middle. like you might see at a doctors office or massage parlor. there are a group of people here. official looking individuals in professional attire. and then others-- in brown suits. almost like scrubs?

    and they lead a woman up to the table and have her lay down and shes talking rapidly and I am standing there and watch as they take out a needle and she continues to talk quickly and they inject her and she just stops and flops back. and then some other people walk in and pick her up and haul her out. and so it continues. they lead people to the table and they inject them and then they carry them away.

    and then I guess my--client? my person. my friend? im not sure-- but he is up next. I don't recognize him. we are friendly but we don't know each other very well. and I step up to the table and he is nervous. and I can see it in his eyes. and he reaches his hand out and I just instinctually grab it. and he is tense. like a coiled snake. ready to leap. but they all have shackles on. and so they can't leap. and I feel the moment is drawing near. no one is really talking. we are communicating with eye contact alone and through the tense nature of his fingers digging in to my hand. and I try to soothe him. somehow this is my role. to soothe him.

    and inside I know he is going to die. for something. perhaps this is a new form of lethal injection. but my role is to be the soother. and so I am soothing him. but inside my heart feels like it is breaking. I cant do this. I feel lost. I feel sick. I don't want him to die. and they walk up and he tries to pull away. and I want to intervene but I know I cant. and his eyes are boring in to my soul.

    and he mouths "I love you...." and I mouthe "I love you too". Soothing? Or do I truly care for this person? Part of me feels like we are friendly. like he means something to me. like I don't want him to die.

    and then the men in the professional dress walk up with their needle and I am pushed back and I don't want to watch but I have to watch and they start injecting but instead of immediately flapping back, the man just starts to convulse. and scream. and the man in the business attire doesn't know what to do and glances at his colleague. and I ask whats going on and no one can answer and my friend/client is flopping around and screaming. and I ask if this has happened before. and the professionals just say "we do about 6 a day and this hasn't happened".

    and somehow time passes. and my 'friend'/client survived and no one knows what to do with him because he was sentenced or committed to death. and there is a second attempt but this time there are so many people there. everyone wants to see the man that cheated death. and I am angry because I can't get to my friend. and I think "where were you all the first time? you didn't even care!'

    and I am running from room to room trying to find my friend and so alarmed I won't be there for him and worrying that he'll be alone-- even though he is surrounded by all these hundreds of people. that he'll die and think I forgot him.

    ---

    and then I am going to school. I am a student? I guess. and I am trying to unload my car but I forgot something. and I am running late. and when I walk inside to check in, they ask me if I am here to check in and I know I am in trouble and think I should have just not come at all if I was going to be late. and the lady at the reception desk has a very small man on her lap and I notice he has a really ornate, colorful tattoo on his left arm and I think 'wow how neat'.

    and then the alarm went off.
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