Thread: Really struggling

If you are very sleepy you will not dream, you only dream when you are sleeping but don't really need it, if that makes sense. Thats why REM sleep happens after about 4 hours of NREM sleep, because your body is doing the serious rehealing. Maybe it is because you have a young child that this is not possible, once you can sleep a healthy amount it will be easier.

Originally Posted by Jet

I'm really struggling here.

I've been trying for about 3 weeks now and if anything my dream recal is getting worse and I've never got to any point of lucidity

Also, I have a young child so am woken at least once a night and also nap with her in the day but will nothing.

I do RC all the time etc but and either so tired at the end of the day I just fall straight asleep or just wake in the morning totally blank

Need serious help here I am starting to give up hope

Welcome to the forum Jet, PM me. I will do my best to guide you to Lucidity.

Also another factor may be stress: stress makes dream recall and lucid dreaming less likely. Part of it may be that you are trying too hard to achieve lucidity. You may want to try to relax for a while, spend some time not trying to push yourself to do this, and lucid dreams may happen if you do not try to achieve them. Another option would be to reduce your efforts to just something simple like doing a regular reality check, but without stress, and take on more of an attitude that if lucid dreaming happens great but it is ok if it does not for now.

While your child is not sleeping through the night may not be a good time to attempt lucid dreaming. I remember it well when my boys were not sleep trained yet, and all of us were barely functioning on not enough sleep and too much stress. I remember how cranky and impatient I was, and what a huge improvement in our life styles it was when my sons learned to sleep through the night. I do not know whether your child is old enough yet to teach him or her to sleep without waking at night? Also I do not know which techniques for teaching your child to do this you are willing to try or not - lots of controversy there among parents whether crying it out is appropriate or not (although even those who are proponents say that one should not do it when child is too young, and even those who initially are against it may wind up doing it in desperation ultimately when other techniques just do not work). What I can tell you is: it does get better, and once your child masters sleeping through the night, you may find that a lot of issues go away, including your trouble achieving lucid dreaming.

If your child is not a baby / toddler any more, and yet is waking up in the middle of the night, have you talked with the pediatrician about it? If not, I would encourage you to do so, and hopefully with help you will figure out how to resolve it.

This is the part I would focus on first, if I were you, the sleeping through the night.

Thanks for the replies

She wakes once a night and goes back to sleep fine so I'm not interested in any sort of sleep training thank you.

I just seem to be making no progress, if anything my dream recal seems to be getting worse

I have another idea that may or may not help. I still think stress may be a key issue with your not attaining lucidity and also with the dream recall getting worse. So to reduce stress about dreaming and dream recall issues, perhaps you can try something to engage your funny bone in your efforts to attain lucidity: perhaps putting up some sort of funny decoration around your room to help remind you of dreaming, perhaps coming up with a sillier mantra (there are so many boring ones out there like "Next time I am dreaming I will remember to realize that I am dreaming." - while that is good in helping one fall asleep with dreaming on one's mind, but it's not fun): how about making a mantra about dreaming that rhymes, or coming up with alternate lyrics to one of your child's favorite songs and making those alternate lyrics be about lucid dreaming? Sometimes if we remember to not take something seriously, it helps our mind think outside the box, relax, and achieve the goal we are aiming for.

You seem to be really bothered about your dream recall getting worse, and that may be hindering you. Dream recall isn't really about how much you remember; it's more like the conscious effort to remember something, and once you've trained your brain to do this it'll become natural to remember a dream in the morning, even if you aren't concentrating on it. When you wake up in the morning, try laying back down for a few minutes and just thinking about anything you dreamed during the night. If you can't remember anything, write that down; it's better to say that you at least tried than nothing at all. And if you do remember something, concentrate on it for a few minutes and see if you can add anything to it, then write that down. If you remember to do this, your dream recall is sure to get better eventually.

Drink melatonin supplements. your vividness increases with the counterpart of nightmares(had one today around 3:30) but I bear them well as I am strong.

another factor is marijuana, smoke it and sleep becomes deep and rem-less I have smoked weed for 6 days in a row and stoped yesterday, getting a masive REM rebound with many lucids.

This will be my second night with rem rebound+melatonin but not anybody can handle the nightmares that follow as a consequence but in my opinion everything comes at a price, a horrible nightmare followed by three or four lucids is a fair bargain.

moral: experiment with rem and rem rebound because once you get a feeling of dreams and lucidity its easy to replicate it, also rem rebound is one of the most amazing things on top of my head even if not lucid.

Ps: there is legal weed called spice that doesnt show in urine(if it doesnt break your moral code id say GO FOR IT RIGHT NOW!)

Edit: Do NOT masturbate before bed! Think how important your dreams are if you get urges. if your dreams are as important to you as you make it seem you should have no problem with that. **I dont know why this is but I assume(Assuming is bad) its because the excitement causes natural melatonin to decrease**

Originally Posted by Jet

I'm really struggling here.

I've been trying for about 3 weeks now and if anything my dream recal is getting worse and I've never got to any point of lucidity

Also, I have a young child so am woken at least once a night and also nap with her in the day but will nothing.

I do RC all the time etc but and either so tired at the end of the day I just fall straight asleep or just wake in the morning totally blank

Need serious help here I am starting to give up hope

What method/methods are you currently using to try and improve your recall?

Are you getting enough sleep?
You mention you have a young child so I'm guessing probably not. If you're not sleeping enough then your REM is going to be limited, but then again I know that's something you probably can't fix too easily. Try your best to wake up calmly if possible, I always find the days i'm rushed I have zero dream recall. Also relax! remember you're doing this for fun, no one is judging you, just take it all in your own time and it'll work out.

Don't give up!!! I work 3rd shift and don't get much sleep during the week (2 young kids also). Anyway, it took me just over a month for my first, 3 seconds long, LD. Then another month for another 5 second tease. It has now been over a month but I'm stuck during the week with poor sleep so accept that it could take longer. With just the 8 seconds I've been lucid, it's well worth it.