ThreeCat Gave a really good reply, the general issue seems to be a lack of awareness in a dream.

As you've said:

" My assumption is I’m not dreaming."

One trick I've learned is to do reality checks with the assumption that you are dreaming. This challenges the basic human assumption that all experiences are waking experiences.

It shifts the burden of proof on your mind to prove that you are NOT dreaming.

Another thing I've found helpful is meditation. Some people are thrown off by meditation or see it as mysticism or new-age non-sense. However, meditation has been proven to improve mental clarity and concentration.

In my personal experience I've found meditation very helpful for increasing both my waking state and dream state awareness.