Krista's Dream Journal

Dream - Lucid

I dreamed a little more than this last night, but I really felt the need to record these, as they were quite vivid, the second one also being very intense.

I was teaching at a summer school/camp with my friend Rachel, who is also pregnant. Her baby had a rare birth defect where its heart was developing outside the body (this is a real thing btw for those who aren't aware). She and I were sitting together and she started crying. I closed my eyes and felt so sad for her. I put my hand on her leg. I believe I may have even shed a tear. I asked her about the operations they would have to do on the baby. The sadness I felt for her was very intense.

We were all assigned one child for the program. They would actually live with us (and apparently I lived at my parents' old house with them). Mine was a little blonde girl in the 5th grade.

The program's classes were divided into grade levels. Both Rachel and I's kids were in the 5th grade level. The classes were held outside in these station/kiosk type things. I saw my child playing there. I then had to pee so I went to the bathroom. The stall was like a port-o-john but only had a small, narrow place to sit and a narrow hole to go in. It was built for kids, and I "remembered" this from when I was at this same school as a child. I started to go but was peeing on the floor. I adjusted and peed on my underwear. They were soaked by the time I was done so I took them off and threw them in the garbage. I then heard people outside. A young female teacher saw the pee on the floor coming out from underneath the stall. She assumed the toilet had been backed up and overflowed and I let her think that, as I didn't want to tell her that I peed everywhere. She got a plunger-type thing and started to plunge it. Dirty, poopy water came out and splashed me in the face; I guess it was backed up.

I then was walking back to the play areas outside with the teacher; it looked to be evening outside. I was telling her that I had never planned on becoming a teacher, but I was excited to start my real teaching job in the fall.

~

I was in what was my mom's car in a parking lot at night with my brother. We were parked but I'm not sure why. Both of our parents were dead; they had died not long ago in the dream, maybe days or weeks prior. We now were using their car.

These two college-aged white guys came up to the car and started trying to harass us into letting them in. They wanted to rob us. We locked the doors and wouldn't let them in. They started to laugh and got an ax and baseball bat and took them to our tires. Whatever, we were still safe. I saw and heard glass breaking as they did this, but I wasn't sure what it was coming from. We watched these douche canoes fuck up our car. I kept thinking about our parents, and how empty it felt without them.

I then decided to call 911. My brother was just going to call the police, but I felt we needed urgent help. I misdialed it at first, dialing 912 or something instead, and then redialed and was given hold music. I didn't care, I'd wait if I had to.

My brother then had to get out of the car for some reason; I think the cops were there. The guys saw the opportunity and tried to get in the unlocked door, but I locked it and the back door (which was also unlocked for some reason) quickly, before they could get in. They were mad, and I gave them two birdies, one with each hand. This infuriated them, and one pulled a gun on me and started to shoot. He hit me in the neck multiple times. I saw the hole in the barrel light up with each shot, and felt the shock of being hit. I was in shock, surprised that he had actually opened fire. He seemed surprised as well that he had actually shot me. I was holding my neck and saw a cop in the back window. I held my hand out to him and he reached back to me.

I then was out of the car, I think with my brother, walking to an ambulance. I was getting dizzy and woozy from loss of blood. We walked by the guys who tormented us; they were sitting on a curb smoking (at least one was smoking) while police searched their car. I hoped they were going to get arrested. I was then laid on a gurney on the back to the ambulance, which was actually on an open trailer being pulled behind it. I heard them say they could see my bone and my heart, which is how bad the wound was. I was then being driven with my neck wrapped up tight in a scarf. No one was back there with me.

Dream - Lucid

I was at this restaurant that had just opened. The inside was wood, and it was small. I was with a group of other people. We were going to work there. It was a small business. I wondered how they would do, if they would get any business or if they'd end up having to close, as so many small businesses do.

I then was with my old roommate, Katie. We were about to take pregnancy tests. I went into a bathroom stall and sat on the toilet to pee on the stick. Before I could pee on it, I noticed that it was already a little wet from something. I hoped that didn't affect the results. I then put the stick underneath me and peed on it. I waited for the little test area to turn blue. After waiting a bit, I looked at the stick. There were two red lines. I thought it meant a positive result, but one of the lines was crooked, which meant an inconclusive result. I started feeling panicked about the inconclusive result, and wanted to take another one right away. I remember telling someone it was inconclusive.

I went back to the restaurant thing again. I can't recall what happened.

I then somehow got a hold of another test. I went to pee on that one, making sure nothing got on the stick before then as to not screw up the results. I peed, and the lines were blue, meaning not pregnant. At least now I knew for sure. I was kind of disappointed though.

~

I was watching either a video or I was in third person watching Dallas and I play music together on a stage. I was seeing us from a top view. We had 3 or 4 songs that we did. I sang and he played the electric violin (like he does IWL). My voice sounded airy, but clear and pretty. I had the lyrics to at least one of the songs in my head after I woke up in the middle of the night, but I can't remember them now at all.

I asked Dallas if there was such a thing as an electric cello. I wanted to learn to play it. I then saw his violin, and even though it was a violin, it was big and upright like a cello. I wondered if the electric violin was this big, how big is the electric cello? I figured the electric violin was so big so it would have a bigger range.

~

The beginning of this dream is kind of jumbled. It had something to do with computer viruses.

Then, I was walking in one of my old houses, though it didn't look anything like any of my IWL old houses. I was walking up some stairs into my old room, which had all of my old toys and furniture still in it. I entered the room and saw an orange fluffy cat with slightly elongated, pointy ears. She was running around the perimeter of the room. I immediately knew I wanted to keep her. I decided that, since she looked like a fox, I'd name her Fox. I thought about calling her Foxy, but I had already known an animal named Foxy (IWL, an old man who lived in our neighborhood had a corgi named Foxy Roxy). I called out to the cat:
"Fox!"
Then, a beagle walked out of somewhere in the room.
"My name is Fox," she said in a soft female voice, though I think she said it telepathically.
I went up to her and knelt down in front of her. I put my arms out in front of me to hug her. She smelled of dog, but it was ok. I wasn't sure if she'd hug me back, but she did. She put her paws on my shoulders. I was delighted. Telepathically again, she said
"I'm sorry if I smell like dog."
I don't remember my response, or even if I had one. We hugged for a bit. It was such a perfect hug.

I decided to keep both her and the cat, but I was way more excited for the dog (IWL I've never owned a dog, and would consider myself to be a cat person more than a dog person). My parents were with me now, and we were outside. I had Fox on a leash, though I kept calling her Foxy. I was telling Fox that I could now have a guard dog to protect me. Either she or my dad said something about opening the windows when I leave her in the car. Of course I would. I imagined her in the car with the windows open. I was so, so excited for this new companion! I felt very close to her.

~

I was sitting in a restaurant with my old boss from the coffee shop, Teresa. She was asking me if I'd take over the jewelry counter for Emily, because I knew better what I was doing. I looked over to the right and saw Emily's back. She was setting the jewelry cases. I told Teresa I would do it, but I had only set jewelry once. Emily was now Ashley, and she was close to us. She said something to me that was sarcastic as she walked away.

~

I was playing some Mario game that wasn't very fun that you had a time limit on before you had to pay a fee to keep playing. That would happen constantly. I decided to stop playing, and this little girl started to play instead. Sherry, my old boss from Kohl's, was there as well. The girl seemed to be doing things on the game that I didn't figure out, like talking to characters in certain ways. A pop-up menu would come up when she interacted with another character, asking who she wanted to respond like. I remember she chose Tingle (from The Legend of Zelda) for one of the responses. I started to walk away as it played. I read a little bit of the text, but I don't remember what it said.

Now, the girl was a kitten, a black kitten with pink stripes and purple color blocks. I stared at her for awhile. I knew it was very unnatural, but it just made me think about cats breeding with each other that had unnatural colored fur in their blood lines.

The kitten was then the girl again, and she got into some food on the kitchen counter. I thought that she probably shouldn't eat that since she was a cat. Then, I heard Sherry's voice say
"She eats angry mashed potatoes. ____ women shouldn't eat angry mashed potatoes!"
By angry mashed potatoes, I understood her to mean she pouted or was angry when she ate them. Sherry then started to tell me a story about the girl eating angry mashed potatoes in a restaurant.

Dream - Lucid

I was back in time, sometime in my past, though I was still the age I am now. I was at an elementary school. I feel like I was in a group in a classroom.

Then, I was outside the school on a sunny day with this girl of about 9 or 10. She was my friend, but I knew that she would soon just stop talking to me with no explanation as to why (this happened IWL a few years ago with a guy I had become good friends with). We were wearing two-piece bathing suits, or at least I was. I was peeing into the stream of water from this garden hose, and it was turning my pee rainbow. It smelled like piss. I feel like the pissing in the hose stream had something to do with why the girl would eventually stop talking to me.

~

I was with my old friend Bret. He had gotten me this really long, white pipe that had like 4 huge bowls on it that stuck out from the sides. I had it stored away somewhere. It was full of weed in each bowl, but the weed looked like salad with chopped up tomatoes or red bell peppers in it. I saw it in the hiding place we had for it in my apartment.

I was then somewhere else, not sure where though. I want to say I was at the grocery store. I was afraid Bret was going to go smoke all the weed and not save any for me. I had heard him talking about smoking out of that pipe to someone. I was upset, because I wanted to smoke all the weed. I remember saying something to him about it at some point. I was thinking to myself also that I did not have any weed other than the weed in the giant bowls in that pipe, and I didn't know where I could get more; I always hated trying to find weed. I was anxious to get back home to protect and smoke my weed.

I was walking up the stairs to my apartment at some point. It was during the daytime.

~

I was at my old job talking to my friend Kristin who still works there. I figured out she was no longer dating David, but was together with one of my exes, Austin. Interesting.

I then saw Kristin carrying a baby. I knew it was her and David's. It was a girl, barely older than a newborn; she was quite tiny, even for being a baby. Maybe she was a premature baby. I kept looking at her, trying to see if she looked mixed, since David is black and Kristin is white, but she just looked white to me. She was wearing a light blue headband with a bow on it. I saw her looking at Kristin, and she winked. I knew that both of her parents winked, so she probably picked it up from them. The wink looked very intentional, and did not match her baby face, however; it looked so adult-like. She then looked at me and winked. Again, it didn't fit the child's face. She then winked again, this time with her other eye, and then again with another eye around where her nose would usually be. That's when I noticed that she had three eyes.

I was then with Austin and Kristin inside somewhere. I feel like it had something to do with cars. They seemed happy. I remembered Kristin telling me how happy she had been with David, how she had told me once that she was "on cloud nine" (she did say this to me IWL). I wondered what had happened in the short amount of time I had been gone. Either Kristin or Austin then had to leave, I think Austin. I said something to someone else, Cherie' maybe, about Kristin and Austin fucking.
"Of course they've fucked," she said back to me.
I wondered how much she liked his big dick.

~

Tried to do some MILD mantras last night as I was falling asleep ("I will become lucid"). Fell asleep doing them. No dice. Up quite early today for work, earlier than usual. I am glad to see last night's dreams weren't totally uninteresting. Hoping for lucidity again soon. Maybe on a morning when I can sleep in a little. Just gotta keep trying.

Dream - Lucid

My grandpa was still alive, but he knew he didn't have much time left. I was with him, my mom, and my aunt Marge, though I feel as if there were more people there too. They were all very sad about him dying, but he was at peace with it, and was trying to make the most of his last moments.

I was then somewhere else, though the situation had not changed. I opened a door, and saw my grandpa sitting in a chair at the head of a table. His hair appeared different than it ever was IWL, with streaks of red, some blonde and maybe brown as well, though the red is what I really remember. I then caught a quick glimpse of my mom and aunt, who were sad and not wanting him to go. I feel like they were asking him, pleading with him not to die. He looked at peace.

My aunt Marge closed to door. I wasn't supposed to be there for some reason.

~

I was at my old job, which was a department store. It was nighttime. I was in the building with a few other associates.

I was over by the women's fitting rooms, when I saw some lava leaking from a crack that it had caused in the wall. I remember going back to it a little later, and more was coming out. I started trying to cover it with clothing, but, of course, the clothing just caught fire and burned up. I felt as if we were trapped.

I then had another idea. I went to another fitting room with another associate, and we started looking for fire retardant clothing. We looked through lots of packaged pajama sets that normally the store receives around Christmas. I went through lots of red ones. Then, a supervisor, Charles, came up to us.
"Those aren't going to work," he said.
I imagined the fitting rooms slowly filling with lava.

Someone went back in the fitting rooms a little later to get something, and I was surprised when they came back out, because some time had passed, and I figured it was filled with lava by now.

Then, I was close to the front of the store by the doors, when Ashley, another associate and my IWL friend, came back in. I asked her if there was a way out, and she said no, there wasn't. I imagined it outside, us surrounded by lava or erupting volcanoes. I knew we were doomed to die in the building. We all knew.

I then approached Jaime, a manager, and asked her if she had anything strong we could take. If we were gonna die slowly, may as well not be able to feel anything. She took a silver package of these big pills out of her purse. They were Percoset, a strong pain killer (never taken them IWL). She gave one to me, one to Ashley, and took one for herself. The pill was wrapped in another piece of plastic besides the silver packaging, but it was supposed to dissolve when you took it. I put it in my mouth to swallow it. It immediately tasted very bitter. I tried to swallow it, but it was such a big pill, it was proving to be difficult. I really wanted the bitter taste out of my mouth. Before I swallowed it, I already started to feel the effects of the pill. I figured it was a fast-acting pill for those who were in major pain. I remember Jaime chewing her pill. I didn't understand how she could stand the bitter taste.

I woke up for a little bit, then went back to sleep, entering the same dream.

The pill was in full effect now, and I went to the bathroom to pee. I looked down at the tiled floor, and the designs on the white floor tiles appeared to be oscillating. Yeah, definitely feeling the pill. I stood up, and then, even though I did not feel the need to pee, I kept peeing. I peed a lot.

~

I was at the department store I used to work at again, setting up some display on the endcap of a register. It was almost Christmastime. I thought to myself that it seemed so soon for Christmas; it felt as if we had just had it. I remembered the year prior with my husband, who was then my fiance. It seemed like just yesterday.

Then, Ashley walked by. She was wearing a black maxi skirt that was slightly sheer, but only at the legs, and a black top. She said
"It's been a year, and I'm going to be possessive of you, _____, and _____." I can't remember what else she said besides me.
Apparently, Ashley was my wife. She had some issues about Christmas; something about the holiday made her feel insecure. I understood this, and was not upset by it. I just wanted her to be happy. I "remembered" kissing her, and thought about how I never thought I would marry a woman, and how my family never saw it coming either. But I loved Ashley; she was my wife.

I then "remembered" driving to see her the prior year on Christmas, and taking pictures of the road on my way and sending them to her. I remember one in particular of the interstate in front of me. I was in the far left lane, and there was a metal chain-link fence on the divider. I think a semi-truck was also in the picture.

~

I was walking through a city in the daytime. It was sunny out. It reminded me of a video game. I was with my husband, Dallas. The objective of the real-life game was to kill the governor. I had a shotgun on me.

Dallas and I split up at some point. I was walking the streets alone, searching for the governor. I feel like I encountered some people and talked to them, but I can't quite recall. I noticed my husband's absence, and wondered where he was.

I then approached a building and entered it. It was a library. I was standing in the huge foyer. There was a service desk in front of me, and behind it, glass windows looking into a room with computers and books. The floors were dark wood, and the lighting was sort of a "mood" lighting, not too dim but just right. Immediately, I recognized this library as one from a dream I had years ago, and knew I was dreaming. The dream quality instantly started to suffer, so I concentrated on my hands so as not to lose lucidity. My hands were changing as I looked at them, turning into baby hands and sprouting extra fingers. I walked as I kept focus on them, and the dream seemed to stabalize.

I approached a young, tall, skinny girl standing at a podium. She looked to be in her early teens, and had dark hair pulled back into a ponytail.
"What's your name?" I inquired.
"Jaime," she responded.
"Jaime, are you a real person, or are you part of my mind?"
"Part of your mind," she responded with a smile. As she said this, she stepped out from behind the podium.

I then went somewhere else, up some stairs I believe, and into a very crowded hallway with a balcony overlooking the foyer. It was circular and stretched around the edges of the room. I approached a blonde boy, probably about the same age as Jaime, and found out his name was Josh. He didn't really seem happy. He reminded me of someone I met IWL at my old job. He had the same name as well. He looked similar too, though much younger. I was having trouble getting him to look at me in the eye. I took his shoulders in my hands and said something to him, though I can't remember what. I was trying to get him to see something.

I then was not sure what else to do with my lucidity. I didn't feel like I had much more time. I could not remember any goals I had prior to falling asleep. So I decided to do something I actually haven't done in a long time in my dreams: Fly. I took a running start, and people started to look, telling their friends to look because I was going to fly. I ran up and down the hallway a few times before I decided a running start wasn't the best way for me to do this. I leaned over the balcony. I saw all the people across from me on the other side of the hallway, and everyone below me in the foyer. I wasn't sure about this, since I had not done it in so long, but I let myself fall from the balcony. I then flew. Everyone was cheering me on. I was going very fast, however, and felt out of control of my speed, though I could rise and fall when I pleased; when I thought about going higher, I would, and when I thought about going lower, I would. I was just going so fast...

The cheers then started to slow way down, like when a record is slowed down. I had an FA in my bed. I kept my eyes closed for awhile, but finally decided to get up out of bed, because I was hearing what sounded like someone peeing, or water trickling into water. When I went to get up, however, I noticed that my feet were already touching the floor, as if I was half standing, and half laying down in my sleep. I got all the way up and walked down the hallway. I noticed my husband standing in the guest bathroom doorway. The lights were off in there. That's odd, I thought he went to work. I got closer and noticed his shorts were pulled down, and he was peeing. Is he sleep peeing?

Upon getting closer, I noticed he was peeing in my cat's water dish! My cat, Belle, was just standing there too, watching. I started getting really pissed at him (no pun intended), and yelled at him for doing that. I know that he and my cat don't really get along, but seriously?? I started yelling at him to stop, and asking him how he would feel if someone peed in his water. He said something smart-assy back to me. As I was raging, he started to walk away into the kitchen, which was much, much bigger than our IWL kitchen, which actually brought me to lucidity for a second, but I was so angry that I lost the lucidity in my rage. I noticed that the kitchen had chopped up potatoes all over it; the counters and every surface were covered. I knew he had done this just to spite me. I asked him if he was going to clean it up, and he shook his head no. I was so fucking angry. I went into the guest room, which also looked much different, and tried to slam the door, but the coat rack on the top prevented me from doing so (this does happen IWL). Ugh, I was so angry!

Then I woke up for real.

~

Ugh, I can't believe I couldn't remember what I wanted to do with my lucidity. Maybe another night. I'll just keep incubating my ideas, and hope that they come through into my dreams. Glad for the lucidity though! Woot woot!!