ErraticHopper

I'm travelling through the Underground with my boyfriend (?). We cross a metallic grey, wide passage, leading from a tunnel to the escalators. White lights beam down from the ceiling and reflect off the walls. I walk behind him as we step onto the escalator. His broad back in front of me makes me feel safe.

Later, I am with some friends, still in the same Underground station. We step off an escalator and walk through a short tunnel towards the platform entrance. I get a shock as we enter - almost the whole platform has crumbled away, leaving narrow irregular ledges that cling to the wall, bricks sticking out here and there below. We hold close to the wall as we inch along the platform, finding our footing with difficulty. I'm terrified of falling onto the tracks.

Then I am in class, but not in a classroom. There's another, similarly dilapidated platform that we are inching along, murky water lapping almost up to the edge. I reach an unstable part with nowhere to place my feet - the next ledge is too far of a leap, and I know that the nearest foothold won't hold me. It's too small. I can't bear the thought of touching that water, so I crouch down against the wall in despair and refuse to move.

A fruitful night.

1.

I'm at school, wandering around, up and down stairs, through empty corridors. No-one is around. All the stairways and passages seem much longer than usual.

I stop on a huge landing at the bottom of the stairs, at ground floor level. The wall to outside is a large expanse of glass, shimmering panes from floor to ceiling. Outside is a raised platform paved with gravel, walled in to the left by another glassy extension to the building while the other two sides face into the open air.

A girl comes up the stairs from the basement and pauses when she sees me on the landing. She is in uniform - a younger girl - and has a ponytail of bushy, light brown hair. We talk although I can't remember what about. Then she turns to the windows and says, boldly, "I'm going to go out on to the balcony!". I gasp. The balcony is off-limits to students because it gives a clear view into the staff room (the other room on the left) and we are not supposed to see in there. She pushes open a door in the glass and purposefully walks out. I feel terrified that she'll be caught. Suddenly, my perspective shifts: I'm on the other side of the staff room, where there is no balcony, standing slightly below the ground floor level and looking in. I see, through blue glass, rows of desks with computers and chairs. I am shocked to see that the room is completely empty.

Later, I am in a brightly lit hallway on the top floor. Although there are no windows I feel very high up. I walk with another girl, who says she wants to find a bathroom - I know her, she is somewhat tall and has long blonde hair. The bathrooms are along this hallway. She says she doesn't like those tiny narrow cubicles, and prefers the wide ones, so I direct her towards one bathroom which has a few larger cubicles. She ignores me and enters the one next door, only to find every cubicle occupied. Annoyed, she returns, and we go in. It is a very bright and spacious room with white tile up the walls. We pass the sinks and turn the corner to see a row of five large cubicles, and several smaller ones opposite. A few are occupied - I see curly hair over the top of a door - but some are open, and she enters one. I hang about outside, waiting, leaning against the wall.

2.

The sun beams down on us as I cycle, with a group of others, around a gorgeous flower field. Just as I become aware of myself, I see I am crossing a broad flat wooden bridge - though no water in sight - and I look up. We are cycling over a 'path' of slightly flattened and crushed grass, which runs all round at the edge of the huge oval-shaped field. Long grasses are waving and among them crowd pink, purple, blue, red and yellow wildflowers, small, tall, pretty. The air has a sweet grassy smell and the sun shines down warmly, making the whole field glimmer. I think how it's been so long since I last cycled, but it's true that you really don't forget - it feels so free and easy, flying over the grass on my bike. Another girl passes me, lightning-fast and scarily close, causing me to lose my balance and veer over to the fence around the wide edge of the path.

I stop right by the fence and put one foot on the ground. Here is dark green, cool and shady, with climbing and overhanging foliage winding around and above the fence and the trees outside it. The fence is white and curvy, two running rails with periodic posts sticking into the ground. Ivy clambers over it and obscures much of the metalwork from view. I lean over and see a deep, muddy ditch on the other side. I'm taking a moment to rest when another cyclist - a boy this time - comes barreling up the path and almost crashes into me. He stops himself at the last minute and proceeds to angrily yell at me: "Stop by the fence, idiot!" I cry back indignantly, "This is the fence! Can't you see?". He flushes red and rapidly takes off again.

I resume cycling, though stop regularly by the fence. At one point, I look over it and see rushing water. Its calming sound washes over me as I pan my gaze across the field.

3.

School again. I am in French class, in our little room at the top of the main building. We are all chatting and gossiping with the French teacher as we often do. I start telling her about when I saw into the staff room and it was empty - and I see her expression growing almost murderous...

4.

Leaving my house, on a rather grey day, I turn to see one of the neighborhood cats sitting in the street a little further up. He's a friendly black cat (and very fluffy) so I head over to say hello. I crouch down to stroke him, and he stands, turning his head towards me while raising his fluffy tail in the air - exactly like a picture of him my dad sent me last week.

Really happy with these dreams - it's rare that I remember so many. And cat! I love dreaming about cats.

It's starting to get really quiet around here so I hope all the people who haven't been online recently will be back soon. I'm missing having everyone's DJs to read

Lucid! at last...

I'm wandering around the school, I phase through some doors and walls and do some reality checks. Seems like it's lunch break.

I am trying to follow someone, maybe he is a teacher? He has short brown hair and a stubbly beard. He's gone outside and I, in an empty classroom, decide to follow. I jump up onto the sill of the round window and hesitate, then remind myself I'm dreaming. I do a reality check (which fails) and then purposefully leap through the window glass and float down to the street.

There's a building in front of me, an abandoned-looking office building made of beige stone/concrete with dark brown windows. I wonder how to get in - I know I want to explore the right side of the building which I am standing in front of now. I try to fly up, but it takes me a minute to get the hang of flying. I take a jump and at first flutter my fingers by my sides, imagining where I want to go. It doesn't really work so I flap my arms instead, slowly, powerfully wheeling them down on the wind like a bird's wings. I propel myself upwards - too far upwards. I don't want to be above the roof of the building so I stop moving my arms. Then I fall rapidly. I start to flap once more but I can't control my direction - I am careening towards the ground and the wall. I collapse to the ground and quickly get up.

I look for another entry point to the building. There are no doors but a big window above me - from the right distance, I could take a big leap and get right through the window onto the first floor. But now, somehow, I'm worried about people in the school seeing me do that. I walk around a ways and stop in a sheltered area (maybe for parking cars?) under the building, there is a stretch of rough stone wall to the side. I could just walk through it. But, I think, this a bit far from where I want to enter, and once I'm inside I might not be able to find the right room. I pace around the building pondering my dilemma when I turn to see the man I was after returning up the road towards the school. I know it's time for class to start again so I follow him up the exterior stairs (these are new) into the school building. Alas, next time.

Fragment: some kind of superman action, leaping between office buildings in the city and stopping on a windowsill to talk to people inside.

Maybe this was just semi-lucid? I was lucid enough to know I was dreaming, I knew I could do some superhuman things and did a few RCs, but was also dragged into the plot of the dream. I never asked myself why I had to explore that building. I wish I had gone in though! Also, 4th LD, yay!

What do you think? I know lots of you have many more lucid experiences than me. What's your usual level of awareness and self-control?

I'm climbing a staircase - I quickly realise that I'm in my primary school. The steps are smooth, angular concrete, and so are the walls - I remember that in reality, they were brick walls painted white. There is no artwork on the walls as I climb; the stairwell is cold and empty and my footsteps echo off the walls. It rises up a great shaft through the square school building.

I step onto a landing and turn to a set of grey double doors with small windows, to the nursery. They have no frame and are flush with the wall. I push open the doors and enter the nursery. Straight inside the door is a narrow hallway, the staff bend over tables on both sides of the wall. The space feels narrow, crowded and chaotic. I make my way through them and the hall opens into a much wider, clearer room, lit up brilliantly from all over. Half-height bookshelves double as partitions between different areas of the room, coloured beanbags are scattered about and children mill throughout the room. I'm not sure if I'm one of the children or not.

At the back of the room is a wall of narrow cubbyholes. I search for mine; I know whereabouts it is, but someone has let their coat hang out of their cubby so that it covers mine. I fumble around for a bit before finding my cubbyhole, only to discover someone else's stuff inside. I pull it out: it's a black drawstring bag, almost empty so that the fabric sags when I pick it up. I'm wondering what to do with this when I feel a tap on my shoulder.

I turn around. The girl standing behind me is someone who went to my school, but left before Sixth Form. We used to chat from time to time. "Sorry," she says, "that's mine - I'll take it. I just left it there for a moment." I hand her the bag and notice that her hair is darker and shorter than I remember it. "Did you get a haircut?" I ask. When she fully turns to face me I'm stunned to see that there's nothing left of her hair but sparse, thin and wispy curled strands; I can see clearly her near-bald scalp. I know she sees the shock in my eyes as she looks away with a regretful smile. She tells me that she was diagnosed with lymphoma ("lymphomatic") recently and is being treated. I don't know what to say. A crowd throngs around us of girls trying to collect their belongings.

I leave the nursery. As the doors fall closed behind me, something compels me to open them and look inside once more. Every teacher in the hallway snaps their head towards me, terror in their eyes. Each wears a plain dress, a crisp white apron and a cloth bonnet, and they bend over to tend to babies wriggling and squirming on the tables. Left speechless by their reaction, I slowly close the doors again and leave.

Then I am on the train, going home. It's cramped and I am squished against the wall of the carriage, arms clutched to my chest. The light down here is cold and dim, occasionally flickering. The train rattles as it rushes through the tunnel. I feel tired of the monotony, my eyelids flutter.

Soon I am walking down the high street away from my station. I compulsively check my belongings; touch my backpack strap, check. Feel my coat over my arm, check. Then I feel around under the coat and on my shoulder, but I can't find the tote bag that I always carry. At the realisation adrenaline bolts through my body and I almost feel sick. Where is it? At school? Then I have to go back. My wallet, phone and keys are in there, not to mention library books. What a pain... I'm already dreading the thought of getting back on that train.

As I'm figuring out what to do I clench my left hand and feel the resistance of something hard. It's my phone. That should be in my other bag, and it's here - but the bag isn't. All these different trains of thought and lines of reason swirl into a whirlwind of confusion. I stand stock-still in the middle of the pavement, mind racing as I begin to feel worse and worse.

Ugh I am not having a great time on the site recently... Every time I visit I get to spend much more than a few seconds 'verifying you are human' which then repeats itself after a few minutes and in the process logs me out and deletes the DJ I am editing. Drives me mad!

Long dream this time!

SPRING COMPETITION NIGHT 7

I'm at home, in my room. It's the holidays and I'm not doing much - just lazing around on the floor, in a T-shirt and shorts and looking out of the window. It's sunny outside.

I receive a delivery of a big box of pastries, from school, for the prefects. There's a note from a teacher explaining that, since we're not at school, she sent them here instead (FYI I'm the head of the prefects). I guess she wanted me to distribute them, but it's the holidays after all, and I don't know where everyone lives. Also I really can't be bothered. I'm in a lazy mood. I eat some - probably more than my fair share - close the box and lay back down.

The next day I wake up to a message in the prefect group chat (from someone who's not even a prefect IRL). She mentions the pastries and that everyone's looking forward to them. I start to feel guilty for not handing them out and remember some other things I forgot to do. I hope everyone won't notice how scatterbrained I've been.

I go into school. There aren't many people, but in the school hall are some younger year girls in the centre of the room. They've built a rather wobbly (I tried to climb it) staircase out of some big plastic boxes and a desk chair, up to a high table. One of the steps is a block of something white and strange - I think they said it was squid - and a blonde girl refuses to go up it. The girl who placed it there complains that her friend doesn't understand the true usefulness of squid. I laugh at the girls and ask what they think they're doing.

I go up to a whitewashed classroom on the second floor, which seems to be our room in this dream. There's no-one in there but plenty of sunlight coming in through the windows. I think that I'd better get the pastries - and then I remember that I threw them out! I have a vision of the box left on top of a broken desk chair and a heap of cardboard boxes in an alley. I panic. What should I do? I know everyone else will arrive soon. I leave the room and run down the hall. In another room, bizarrely, I find the box. Although I don't understand how they could be there, I'm relieved and bring them back to the classroom.

Such a strange dream... At least things worked out in the end. Actually this is the first time I've eaten food in a dream! A milestone - though I don't think it counts for points if the dream isn't lucid. I can't remember how they tasted, alas.

P.S. I like to dress smartly and I would never wear a t-shirt and shorts, even on holiday!

I enter my school's sixth form building late at night. As I head down the hall towards the dining area I can't see anything around. The hall is black carpeted and so is the larger room. The usual round tables are nowhere to be found and the serving counter is lower and farther forward than it is in real life. It's made of smooth white marble. The fridge is also shifted to the left. Though not quite real, the room is easily recognisable.

Nobody is around, but I get the impression a big gathering has just ended. Everyone else has probably gone upstairs already. (Seems like this is a dormitory in the dream - IRL there are only classrooms upstairs). There are lots of desserts left over.

On the counter are two large slate trays, each piled with jelly cut into cubes and stacked. One tray holds red jelly and the other, yellow. In the fridge is another tray of orange jelly and a cake liberally piped with cream on the top and around the sides. A few slices have already been cut out. Pitchers of clear juice or squash are on the shelf, one cherry-pink and one orange. I love desserts. I'm thrilled and head over to fill a plate.

I am really annoyed that I don't remember anything more! I've yet to taste food in a dream, still.

A room in the school with a large oval-shaped wooden table in the centre. Books and folders are around, stacked and leaning inside the filing cabinets which line the walls. I am there, another student (who I recognise) and a teacher. We are in discussion, then we leave to head to assembly, shutting the door behind us.

She and I enter assembly in the hall. There is a stage at the front of the room with floor-to-ceiling red curtains hanging open at the back. Everyone sits facing the stage on blue mats on the floor, shaped like those foam pool floats (kickboards?) that I learnt to swim with when I was a kid. There are three mats on a thick blue runner which are set aside for us two to sit on. I sit in front of her, but there's not enough space so I end up leaning on her legs a little. I look to my right and see that all the blue mats on the floor around seem minuscule, smaller than my fingernail, like scales.

As the assembly goes on, I'm relaxing more against her legs when she puts her arms around me from behind. I feel her hair brush my neck. I'm surprised - but it feels really warm, and I take it as affection between friends. Soon she starts lightly kissing my head and neck. I feel my whole face heat up and I'm not sure if this is still just friendly. I can't believe no-one is noticing.

This actually feels nice, but I don't know how to react, so I pull away from her a little. She loosens her arms and says, "Sorry. I just need this right now." I lean back into her hug again and she kisses my hair some more. After a short while I end up pushing her away with a brief apology. I distinctly remember thinking, 'I better remember this when I wake up...'

Well.

Fragment: I am inside a certain (named) church with some family, looking at some old coloured maps of it. The interior reminds me of a regency building from a period drama, the walls are freshly painted white and I can see in the corner of my eye an antique-style sofa with green upholstery. The exterior is like a Greek temple with columns (the front at least) - which actually looks a lot like said church in real life. Which is surprising since I have never been there. I look back at my sister and it seems we are both wearing regency dresses. Looking out from the entrance at the side of the porch, the church is surrounded by green fields as far as the eye can see. They look like they've never been weeded or mown, the grass is growing up tall and I see many clovers popping up amid the grass. The field is dewy and a light mist obscures the view further out. The weather is fresh and chill, and we are leaving.
Maybe this is because I watched Sense and Sensibility recently?

Dream (this is also quite vague and fragmented):
I am inside the school common room. The space feels much more enclosed and cosy than it is in real life. It feels warm and welcoming. I am sitting working on something when I get up and go outside. Outside the school is a wide grassy field, much like the one described above - except there are trees here, too.

There is a high wooden table standing on the grass where two of my friends sit on tall chairs. One is a real friend of mine but the other I don't know - a dark-skinned boy with dark straight hair. They are talking over (I think) her current sewing project, and I mention that I do some sewing, too. We show each other some photos of our work and talk for a while longer.

After some time I begin to feel like I'm being called - there's somewhere else I need to be. Then I remember - I've got to go now. I take my phone and rush away from my friends but leave my bag behind on my seat.

Next thing I remember, I'm boarding a plane, though I only remember seeing it from the inside. The plane is very long. The low light level compounded with the grey-black carpet, upholstery and even walls make the interior extremely dim. I hurry past rows of seats (all facing to the front of the plane) until I reach in the middle of the plane two rows of fold-up seats facing one another. All the rows behind are also facing the front of the plane - only these two are strange.

A music teacher is standing in the aisle telling some other students where to sit. She mentions my stranger friend (who is not with me) and says there is room for him, too, pointing to where I am standing in the backwards row. Then she tells me to sit down. I hurriedly fold down the seat nearest the aisle and sit, clutching the edges of the seat for balance - since there are neither armrests nor seatbelt. I feel uneasy. My friend hasn't arrived yet and the plane is about to take off. Then a real-life memory comes through: I remember that my phone has only 30%, it won't last long and I've forgotten my bag and portable charger. Frantically I tell the teacher about my bag, but she turns away and ignores me. I jump up and am about to turn and run out of the plane to get my things. But...

I glance to the side and am shocked to see trees rushing past the window, blurred. The plane is already racing through the field and I didn't feel a thing. It tilts up, about to take off.

Went to bed at 11:14 PM; began lucid attempt at 11:37 PM. Lucid FAILED and woke at 6:20 AM.

It's a blue, sunny morning and I am following my school librarian through the city. I don't think she knows I'm behind her. She's wearing low heels and a flared below-the-knee dress with a book pattern on it, a bag on one shoulder and no jacket to cover her wavy brown hair. Cars are driving past while the sun glints on the glass exteriors of office buildings, cafés and small shops are opening up.

We turn away from the main road and down a smaller street. I recognise it; I took a photograph of it once. The street is perhaps poured concrete and is uneven, with imperfections here and there as though it's been pierced with a fork or blown up by a big bubble. Looking down it the buildings shine and seem to merge with the sky beyond, reflecting the blue and the white clouds. At the top is a stop sign: EXCEPT CYCLES.

Some ways down the street she turns and enters through the double doors of a green-blue glass building. Inside the lobby there's a glass reception office, empty, containing a shiny black desk and a window to allow visitors to speak to the receptionist. The floor is that kind of carpet with metal ridges in it. She enters the office and sits at the desk - looks like she works here. But I realise this isn't where I'm meant to be. A crowd of girls in a dark-coloured uniform different to mine spill into the lobby from within to greet her.

I feel confused and register that she should be working at my school. I ask her about this and receive some explanation in return. The thought vaguely enters my mind that I am late to school.

Lately I haven't remembered many dreams because I've lost control of my sleep schedule a bit. Tonight's New Years but I do intend to start going to sleep at the right time again. I've begun studying some lucid techniques and will update my workbook very soon!