non-lucid

Jan 10, 2013

Dream:

It's in the middle of the night, I'm standing in the kitchin and it's dark outside while the light is on inside so I can pretty much just see the reflection of myself when I look out the window. I think I'm on my way to the bathroom or going to grab some food from the fridge (I've walked this exact route so many times I can actually walk it with closed eyes, tried and tested).
As I'm walking I get this feeling, like someone is watching me, so I look out the windows and I see a dark silhuet standing just outside, but I can't see it properly so I switch off the lights and look out the window again. As I look into two tiny black demon like eyes my heart starts beating faster and I'm having a hard time breathing. I'm struck by a loud high pitched noice. It's so loud that I'm deafened by it and I'm literally paralyzed for what feels like an eternity but in reality was more like seconds. My eyes are locked with the eyes of this creature. It feels like I'm getting drawn into the bottomless void that is it's eyes and I'm filled with stress and anxiety. It's as if I'm about to burst.
But then with a snap of the fingers I'm freed from it's grasp as it turns away from me and start walking. My angst is instantly relieved to some extent and I can move again though with great effort as my body is still weary and I have to lean against the kitchen table to remain on my feet.
The entety has seems to have grown smaller only about a few feet high and it seems confused or panicy like it is just as afraid of me as I am of it. It doesn't move in a straight line and it moves weird. It seems as if it can't bend his legs and it's arms are stiff down the sides. The way it moves actually resemble the way a penguin would move. A vicious demon penguin of evil anyway.
It's dressed like Chapin so i guess 'it' must be a 'he' and his head is completely unproportionate. It's huge compared to the body. The head alone makes it for atleast one third of his height. His face looks as if it where painted on, he looks very old with long wrinkles like the rings on a tree stub. He has a blank expression on his face and pale skin.
I'm still having trouble breathing properly, the pitched noice is still there and my hearth is still pulsing through the roof.
I'm trying to yell out to this demonic midget or whatever it is, but I can't. I'm yelling so hard that my chest is getting sore but no sound escapes my mouth. My efforts are brought to a halt as the noice increases in volume, louder than ever. My hearth is pounding away faster and faster for every second and I seem to lack the ability to breath. My legs are tremblind beneath me and i seem to be on the verge of a collapse as the creature turns around slowly. I stare helplessly at it as I'm paralyzed once more. At the moment where our eyes are locked the noice, my breathing, my hearth, everything just explodes everything becomes a dark blur as I in my bed.


Notes:

As I woke up I was breathing really fast and my pulse was definelty faster than usual. Though I realized pretty much instantly that it had just been a dream so i closed my eyes quickly and relazed all my muscles to try and recollect the dream. I seemed to remember some fragments of an earlier dream that night aswell. Namely it seemed like Charles 'the Demon Midget' Chaplin had been haunting me in an earlier dream aswell. All I could see though was a flashing image of 'Chaplin' on a brighter background. Could have been my imagination i guess.

I haven't had a nightmare since i was a kid, and much less have I actually woke up from one. (as far as i can remember)
I used to have nightmares somewhat often and i was scared of the dark and everything. I can't honeslty say that I don't feel weird about darkness anymore though I'm easely supressing any weird feelings with logic. I have often experienced my fantasy making me imagine there would be someone watching me at exactly the spot Chaplin 'the Demon Midget' was standing at (just about a yard from the kitchen window). But again I've had no problems brushing it off as mere fantasy.

I have never had very good dream recall as far as I can remember, but then again i don't remember much from when i was a kid. I never remember more than maybe 1 dream each month.

That is why I was and am focusing on gaining a good dream recall before trying seriously for lucidity.

This dream occured after about 2 hours of sleep on the very first night that i attempted to do anything about my dreams.
I had been researching a lot on lucid dreaming and I was very intent to at the very least recall a dream that night. I also tried to perform a WILD, knowing I would probably fail. And sure i did fail but I had some very interesting hypnogogia before i fell asleep. Furthermore i had set my phones alarm to 4:30 am to attempt the WBTB tecknique.

I suppose it the sum of all this preperation and my state of mind that caused me to have this extremely vivid dream.
By far the most vivid dream I remember. The fact that I hardly ever recall my dreams (even when I do recall dreams they are more like fragments and certainly not very vivid) and the fact that it caused me to wake up (a thing no dream has done to me for several years) all made me truly believe that lucidity is very much possible for me.

This made me sign up here on dreamviews, cause now I'm officially working towards my first lucid dream!

ps. I've uploaded a web cam photo of the drawning I made of Chaplin. ( keep in mind it was drawn at about 1:30 am )

pps. Sorry if there are any spelling or grammar errors. The text is too long for me to look through at the moment. Maybe I'll revisit it later to correct errors.

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