exdreamer's Dream Journal

This is a dream that is important to me because it reminds me of how much of a jerk I was and maybe still am and how much remorse and regret I feel for past mistakes.

I was my old school playing field. It was different; there was a large gate where there was not one before. I was walking through the gate and B was there. I was eager to talk to her but she strangled me with a bicycle chain. It was cutting in to my neck slightly.

B is a girl I used to be friends with and had a massive crush on. I haven’t seen her in years and we parted on bad terms because I was a complete asshole. Anyway...

I was then sitting at a large table, still sore from the chain. My neck was red and bleeding slightly. I was really upset but I still wanted to go and find B and apologise to her for what happened in the past. Also at the table were some old school friends. I looked around and saw that we were in a big hall and that there were lots of tables with people sitting around them. It was loud; people were chatting and joking around with each other.

I noticed that I recognised pretty much everyone in the room. There were people that I knew well and people that I barely knew. It was sort of like everyone I had ever met was in one big room for some kind of event.

I mentioned to my friends that I wanted to go and find B. For some reason they didn’t want to let me go. They dared me to make out with a girl sitting at a table nearby us. I recognised her, but she was someone I barely even knew. She was pretty ugly and I had no desire to make out with her, but I got the feeling that it was the only way my friends were going to let me go off and find B which I really felt I needed to do. They called the girl over and she came and sat on my lap. We made out but she was a bad kisser, although for some reason I had a hard-on.

Finally I was free to look for B. The next thing I knew I was sitting at a table across from her. She was wearing a black suit jacket and a red low cut top. She was just staring at me sternly. I felt really bad about what I had done in the past and felt so desperate for her to forgive me. I was struggling to explain to her how sorry I was about everything. She just kept staring at me. I continued to apologise but she didn’t react.