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    maboroshi

    talk about lucid fail; friend and park; brother and drawing; attack helmet; floating with family

    by , 01-13-2012 at 03:46 PM (448 Views)
    Good morning, everybody.

    Dream #1

    A tall, white man, bald on top, with white hair around the sides of his head, and wearing a grey suit with a white shirt and, probably, a maroon tie, was sitting at a table with me in a drably fluorescent-lit room, talking about lucid dreaming.

    I don't remember what the man said now, although I could hear it pretty well. One word in particular really struck me, although when I woke up I seemed to think that that word could have applied to any subject.

    Dream #2

    I was standing at the edge of a city park. The park felt small near me, though I had the idea that it was actually a rather large park. I stood on the inside of a black-painted iron fence. A sidewalk ran just outside the park. It was a nice, sunny day. There were a lot of people on the sidewalk.

    Somehow I saw, off to my left, my old friend R walking around the corner. He was walking under the shade of some trees. I didn't really want to see him again. But if he was here, and if he saw me, I supposed I should be happy to talk to him.

    The entrance to the park was on my side. And R was rounding the corner to reach my side. But for some reason, I started walking over to the side of the park where R was. It was like I wanted to meet him before he got to my side.

    But, only a few steps away from where I'd been, I realized that I'd just left my backpack (??? -- don't wear one IWL) behind. I turned around to grab it. It might have been leaning against a tall headstone, like for a grave.

    I grabbed my backpack. But by this time, R had already rounded the corner. He was now walking past where I stood. He may have said something to me. We may even have been talking to each other -- in my head. R was already about to reach the next corner.

    Somehow I came to understand that I would be meeting R at some other place, like we'd arranged to meet each other for dinner or at R's house or something. I now walked away from the park gates and down toward the opposite end of the park.

    The park, I'm pretty sure, had a lot of gravestones in it. It might actually have been a cemetery. I walked across a lawn full of gravestones, under the thick shade of trees.

    At some point I saw -- as if I were walking there, but not quite -- the street on the other side of the park. It was an empty street, with a big, residential apartment building. The building was kind of old and run down. It was made of stone or concrete, and it was painted white. It glared in the sunlight.

    I was thinking something to myself. But I can't remember what. I was probably still continuing my in-head conversation with R.

    Dream #3

    I was sitting on a couch with my brother. My brother sat to my right. To my left was another couch, on which sat two or three women. The women weren't my family members, though maybe they were supposed to have been.

    I was either drawing or looking at drawings and humming or singing a tune to myself. I remember sensing the tune -- hearing it and feeling it in my throat. But I don't remember the tune at all.

    The first drawing I was looking at was kind of tall and narrow. It was of some human-like figure. The figure was all green, with a masculine, slender, but muscular body, and a featureless face. The figure had smallish wings, kind of butterfly-shaped, but clear, like fly-wings.

    The figure stood before a background, like a sky fading upward, from the horizon, from yellowish to greenish-yellow, to olive-green.

    The second drawing was of a sky and a landscape below. The landscape was very small as I remember, and the sky was very vast. A whole lot of demon-like entities were being released from the sky. They may have come from some ship, but I can't remember.

    The demons were little, black, scraggly shadows. In the center of these scraggly shadows there were single, pink orbs, almost like eyes.

    The sky faded very quickly from a dark band of blue at the top, to a paler blue, and finally to a white, which took up most of the vast sky. For some reason, the whole thing reminded me of something out of Neon Genesis Evangelion, and I might even have started making up a story about Shinji Ikari attacking these demons.

    I was still humming or singing. At some point the women started singing or humming along with my tune. Finally my brother made some smart-ass comment to me about how stupid my song was. He also asked me something like, couldn't I quit making so much noise while he was around?

    I stopped. I was really offended and angry. The women stopped as well. But they took more of an attitude of being scared by the sudden change in tone in the environment.

    I turned to my brother and said a lot of really bad stuff to him. I remember sensing each thing I said to him -- but I can't remember what I said. All I know is that I was calculating everything I said to hurt him and make him feel as terrible and worthless as possible.

    Finally I said that I only tolerated being around him, and nothing more -- that I didn't like being around him.

    I then did some strange move where I lifted my hands, bent my arms, grabbed onto the back of the couch, and flipped myself over to the backside of the couch. When I did this, I was in another room.

    As soon as I had said everything I felt really terrible. I could tell that my brother had taken everything I'd said to heart. I knew that he'd probably lose faith in himself and go off and get into some kind of trouble. It really upset me that I'd started off that whole chain of events -- even though, while I'd said everything, it was exactly what I'd meant to do.

    I didn't seriously mean anything I'd said, though, and now I wanted to apologize to my brother for everything.

    My brother was standing right next to me. I figured this would be the best time for me to apologize to him and get things back in order between us.

    We were staring at a table full of arts and crafts supplies. The main thing I remember is yellow, plastic canisters of powdered paint. The canisters looked like label-less Crayola products. We had to pour the powdered paint into white, styrofome bowls and add water. I may have called this paint "tempera."

    I was looking at the table and apologizing to my brother. My brother was telling me something like, It's okay, it's okay, I'm okay, don't worry about it. But I still felt awful, and I wanted my brother to know I was sorry.

    Dream #4

    A girl, probably an Asian girl, maybe in her early or mid teens, was wearing a strange helmet. The helmet was made out of brightly polished chrome.

    The skull of the helmet held pretty close to the woman's head. But the jaw of the helmet extended straight forward, on both sides, forming something like two stylized, trapezoidal tusks. There may -- possibly, I'm not sure -- also have been ear-like or wing-like shapes coming off the top of the head.

    I wondered why the woman would need to wear something like this. It didn't make sense, for daily life.

    But somehow I got the understanding that the woman had been attacked, either physically or spiritually, in her life. She was still healing from the attack. And she was still vulnerable to future attacks. So, to protect the healing areas, the woman had to wear this helmet. The helmet may also have helped her fight, in the case of any future attacks.

    Dream #5

    I was at my old friend R's apartment. But, for some reason, it was now my family's house. My mom and my mom's best friend were at the house. My sister was also there. Other people may also have been there. But I'm not sure who they were.

    We were in somebody's bedroom, which was at one end of the apartment. I was sitting on the edge of a big, fluffy bed.

    My mom and my mom's friend were secretly worrying over me. They didn't say anything to me. But they were discussing the fact that I was seeing demons, and that I might, therefore, be suffering from schizophrenia. My sister may also have been involved in the conversation.

    I got up, not quite feeling like myself, but still trying to prove that I was sane. I'm pretty sure the fact was that I was seeing demons. But I think I was trying to prove to somebody that they were real. But if I couldn't prove they were real, I could, at least, in the meantime, prove that I had a decent grip on the rest of reality.

    I walked into the next room, adjacent to the bedroom. I'm not sure what it was. For some reason, I saw the door on the left wall of the room. I wanted to jump from where I was, through the doorway, into the hallway.

    I jumped, and I made it. But instead of landing, I decided I just wanted to keep flying. I knew that one could hover 12cm or so above the ground if one had jumped, and that one could move about a bit more quickly than walking by floating around at this height.

    I floated off to my left, up the hallway, into the kitchen, where my mom and her friend were. They may still have been talking about how crazy I was. I thought they'd especially think I was crazy, now that I was flying around. I think they'd even think I was crazy for thinking I could fly.

    But I wanted to keep flying, and I wanted to prove to somebody that I was flying. So I turned around and headed down the hallway. My sister was walking up the hallway. I figured if she saw me flying she'd know I was flying and that I wasn't crazy.

    But as I passed the front door of the apartment, right before I saw my sister, I passed a pair of high heels. The high heels were very strange. The toes and sides of them were covered in a red fabric with white designs. The heels were covered with something like blue denim and white designs. The shoes were then -- somehow -- fringed with white lace.

    For some reason, these monstrosities really caught my fancy. I said, "Ooh!" And even turned back to look at them as I passed them. My sister saw how I paid attention to the shoes. I thought, Oh great. Now she'll think I like the shoes because I like wearing women's shoes. And she'll think that since I "like wearing women's shoes," I'm crazy.

    My sister was already heading back up the hallway, toward the bathroom, which was near the kitchen. I turned around to follow her, hoping I could say something to her which would make her think I wasn't crazy.

    But my sister was talking to me about some kind of fashion show, which the shoes had been a part of. My sister was talking about one dress in particular from the show. My sister either liked the dress or the model for the dress.

    The model may have looked like an ultra-thin version of Scarlet Johanssen (I probably spelled that wrong). She had pale skin, and her hair was in a very 1930s-style, triangular kind of cut, not quite shoulder length, full of tight, blonde curls.

    The model wore a red dress with white designs. The fabric of the dress was kind of thick and practical, not thin, sheer, or soft. The collar-line of the dress was very low and had a wide v-cut. The sleeves were kind off poofy, in an angular way.

    The model also wore a blue hat, the fabric seemed to be like denim. The had basically just sat, tiltled kind of rakishly, atop the curls of the model's hair. It didn't really fit over the whole skull.
    JesterKK likes this.

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    Comments

    1. JesterKK's Avatar
      Neon Genesis Evangelion featured in your dream too huh? The last dream was really funny. XD
      maboroshi likes this.
    2. TheForgotten 's Avatar
      My mom and my mom's friend were secretly worrying over me. They didn't say anything to me. But they were discussing the fact that I was seeing demons, and that I might, therefore, be suffering from schizophrenia. My sister may also have been involved in the conversation.

      I got up, not quite feeling like myself, but still trying to prove that I was sane. I'm pretty sure the fact was that I was seeing demons. But I think I was trying to prove to somebody that they were real. But if I couldn't prove they were real, I could, at least, in the meantime, prove that I had a decent grip on the rest of reality.
      Haha, demons finally! Just kidding. But when it comes to psychotic disorders, just keep in mind it's all about whether or not you're able to cope with the issues. There are many successful people who 'hear voices' and stuff like that. Think of pastors, psychics, etc.... the difference is they've found a way to make it work for them where it doesn't wreck havok in their lives.

      So... it's perfectly healthy to hear voices

      Dream #3 is interestion. There were demons there too when you decided to go off on your brother. Maybe everything is great between you and him IWL but if it's not, it might be good to figure out a way to voice yourself tactfully. Dreams allow us to view situations from various perspectives so hopefully this was helpful to you in some way. I also wonder what role demons act in your dreams here... they didn't act directly with you but they seem to be drawing attention to specific areas.
      maboroshi likes this.
    3. maboroshi's Avatar
      Hi Kaomea. Thank you, as always, for your insights.

      I also wonder what role demons act in your dreams here... they didn't act directly with you but they seem to be drawing attention to specific areas.
      I like this idea in particular. I'll have to think it over a bit. Thanks again.