Sehnsucht

Now, with no university stuff to do for a while, I'll try to get into this a bit more seriously again.
This time, it's only a fragment I keep thinking about.

I am in a cave, but on my way outside.
A weird dog with a human face comes from behind, and tells me to not leave the cave, to come back inside.
I don't feel the need to respond, and get to the exit.

There is another dog with a human face this time, looking at me with evil intent.
The dog from earlier shouts that I needn't talk to him.
I look at the dog in front of me, he says something weird.
I get this nightmarish feeling, and am suddenly lifted on top of the cave by a weird force.

I immediately realize I am dreaming, though I wake up after this.

Those two dogs were scary as fuck, I woke up all sweaty.
Maybe I'll try to look for them again.

I arrive at school by bike, and first thing in the morning I see, someone is getting bullied by two bigger guys. Without thinking, I grab one of the guys' arm, and tell him to stop. He looks at me as if I was the weird one, bu I insist on them stopping. I throw hard words around and act selfconfident, finally tell them to piss off. They retreat; the bullied person doesn't seem to mind me, he is chatting with some friend now. I think that a thanks would be appropiate, but on the other hand a weakling annoying me the whole day would be bothersome.
As I proceed to the school building, a girl I know starts talking to me about how amazing I handled the situation just now. She asks if my next test will be about psychology or something similar. At first I wonder why maths or physics aren't my main tests, but then remember I had to take a test on something unrelated to that too. The girl introduces me to a teacher which appears to be an expert on the subject. We ask her if she could help me on my subject "human relationships", but she isn't knowlegdeable in that.
I am sunbathing in the garden, when I hear ABs voice from above. She yells that beside me is someone who knows alot about psychology. I look around, but there are quite a few girls sunbathing in bikinis around me. I ask her using hand signs which one it would be, And she thinks a while and shouts "BOOM BOOM BOOM". First, I think about a car advertisement, but then remember that there was a popsicle add like that. The popsicle was red, I look around and the girl in front of me has a red bikini. I get up and talk to her about my situation. She is perplexed and wants to know why I am talking to her about that. I got the wrong one, AB comes down with another girl in a red bikini.

I am in my hometown, on the local market square. DS and J and his dog are with me. We wander around, J somehow manages to lose his dog. I think I saw a while ago, and proceed to that spot. It's an ice cream parlor. Inside, there are a few guys I know from way back, having a meeting. I go to their corner and interrupt their conversation with banging on the table. They look surprised and confused, looks like they don't remember me. I start to look them in the eyes and tell them their names one after the another. Astounded, one of the girls recognizes me. They act all happy about it, but I ruin the mood by asking "Why wasn't I invited to this?". They try to dodge around the question and want me to sit with them, but I say I have company. It started pouring really hard, but I get back to J and DS, J looks like he cried a bit. I say We have two choices, call the police or go to the nearest animal shelter." But it looks like the police already arrived with 2 big birds to search for the dog. The birds seem to search by smell, and find an old lady with a dog running around; but not J's dog. I ask her about J's dog and she pulls him out of a big shopping bag, he looks a bit weak. I give the dog to J.

Had a semilucid today, with weird symbolism.

I am riding on a trainlike wagon, without fences or a ceiling. A few guys are with me. I look at the scenery, we are riding nearby a cliff. I notice some weird buldings on top of it. They are shaped like heads, completely black, with dark-blue ice growing on it. I ask who lives in there, they say "wizards".

Later, I am at a gas station, buying ice pops. They are blue, black and yellow.

Black and blue ice...makes me think of reality.

The headhouses with wizards living in it make me think of banjo Kazooie. Mumbo was one crazy fellow.

It is night in my old neighborhood. I look at the sky, and the moon is so big. I am surprised, but it is beautiful too. I decide to get my bike and get out of town, to see the moon and the stars better. So beautiful. The moon has mathematical structures on it. I wonder how the stars are visible when the moon shines so bright...

I am a little child, and my father, my brother and me are climbing a mountain. My father looks like Doug from King of Queens, and my brother looks like Stewie from Malcom in the middle. So we are climbing the mountain, racing who will be first. It is evening, the sun is getting red. The mountain only has green grassland. We arrive at the top, it gets harder and harder to climb. Now, the grass is rainbow-colored, and on top of the mountain is a rainbow colored tree. I get up there first, and touch the tree. "Look at this coloring, there has to be gold under this tree!" But my father says "Leave it alone, let's go down again." I and my brother run down, my brother seems to really have fun.

Fuck this, my most common dream sign, and I don't get it. If I want to climb heights, or get into something really bad, a mysterious force stop me, and it gets harder and harder. I wonder if this is common.

I am at an elementary school at night. I look at the door from one class, and the teacher's names are written on it. Somehow I think that those are my old elementary teachers, and get away from that class. There are some delinquents around, throwing fireworks around. I spot a little child which looks like someone I know, and try to talk to him.

"Hey little one, do you happen to have a big brother called ML?"

"Yea, how do you know?"

"I know your brother from military, but sadly, after we dropped out, we didn't have contact with eacah other. Can you tell me where you live?"

"...No, you are a stranger."

"Ah, that's right. Then how about this, I will give you my telephone number, and when you get home, you tell your brother to call me, ok?2

"Alright!"

He takes out a gameboy, and tells me to dictate the number. We fail a quite a number of times, but in the end, it worked out.


I am surprised I got the number right in the end, and am mad that such a common dreamsign didn't strike me as odd.

I am at my old neighborhood, with my brother, a friend from military, and two guys I know from highschool. They are practicing boxing, and encourage me to do it too. I try it, first against a big guy from high school. I shake my fist around, and he laughs. He shows me the place on the head which I should aim for, at the side of the head behind the eye. I try it out, and strike him exactly there. He gets pissed, but is dizzy now, and can't win anymore. I fight the other highschool guy too, and the one from the military doesn't even want to, because he is scared of me. Then I am up against my brother. He is practicing boxing (in real life), so he should be strong. I can see it in his face and stance; the other ones were nervous and irritated, but my brother stands firm and is focused. I get to hit him a few times, but his endurance is far higher than mine. I rub my eyes, and suddenly my vision drops to the ground. I stagger around, my eyes are fixed to the ground and not under my control. I drop down, stand up again, wondering what'S going on. I remember that I had this before, my eyes in real life are opened. I try to close them, and spin around, but nothing helps, I wake up.

Me and my friends are getting in line for a movie. Even though the line i very long, we somehow manage to get in first. CM is getting his Laptop ready and trying to connect it to the big screen. I ask my friends what is going on, and they say that CM has programmed a cool game which features multiplayer. The game is pretty much the same as "The day of Sagittarius 3" (a game featured in a certain anime), but you don't play in teams, it's free for all. All my friends get their Laptops ready and start to fight each other on the movie screen. I wonder if we get in trouble for this, but CM says that the manager agreed to it the moment he saw it, he apparently is programmer too.

I am watching a movie with my family. It was about a couple in Bonn. They have fun more or less throughout the day, and in the end, the guy (which looks like Wilson from Dr. House) did rent a boat for the night. They watch the stars, and spend the night in its luxurious interiors. Next morning, the guy is not feeling well, he probably drunk too much. He is wearing a military Uniform, but it looks like a russian one. It is winter, everyone is walking through town in coats. On a big square, the military is holding something like a ceremony. The couple walks by, the guy is leaning on the woman. What's more, right in front of the ceremony, he starts throwing up. The military can't overlook such disgraceful behavior, and surrounds them. "Get away from him!" The woman has no choice gut to obey, they are pointing with guns at them. As punishment, his arms get stabbed with bayonetts. The woman cries and asks people to bring him to a hospital.

my recall isn't good this morning.

Ash is fighting a big Pokemon fight in a tournament, many people are watching. His opponent is very strong. Ash uses Pikachu and some earth Pokemon to defeat the opponent's tentacool (which is kinda huge). The earth pokemon uses a very strong attack; everything gets black, and plates of stone appear out of the blue to crash down on the enemy. The ground crumbles too. The opponent is driven into a corner, and says: "Guess I'll have to use that". He summons a Pokemon which belongs to Ash. I can't believe it, and run into the forest behind the opponent to reveal the truth. There I see past versions of Ash and his friends, feeling down. I don't even need to think about what's going on, someone is definitely messing around with timetravel.
I soon find out that the culprit is a teacher at my school, and me and another woman are interrogating her now. She realizes she has been found out, and tries to persuade us with all the things she could do to improve our life. The teacher begins to waver, but I am firm in my resolve.

I woku up pretty often tonight, so I can remember pretty much every dream I had. In addition, yesterday I reread some entries of Hyu's adventures, which probably caused me to have a few of the following dreams.

I am facing Hyu in a dream match. The game goes like this: We both have small items with us, and place them alternately on a plate. Whoever has more items on the plate at the end of the game wins. Of course, it is not that simple. You can't touch the items directly or use physical force to kick the other items out, you have to entchant your items with magical power, so they do it on their own. People on the internet are cheering us on. I can't remember most of the tricks used, however, Hyu was using items with enforced gravity, so they won't tumble down easily. In the end, I use a hair which cuts everything it touches on Hyu's tower of items, they fall apart und tumbledown, more than half of it goes off the plate. I win.

It is night, I am in the deep swamps at some church. With me are Hyu, a woman (Yuya?) and an old small man. We go to the second floor and await an enemy attack. The old man decides to go first, and casts a trap. A big, floating octopus made of water appears. The enemies appear, they are about 10 people. The octopus gets them by surprise, grabbing most of them and throwing them around. Only 3 or 4 persons remain, now Hyu, the woman and I charge in. I shoot fire balls out of my fists, and cut though the wind to avois enemy magic.

Still night, the three of us and another woman which looks kinda like Zelda are at a hot spring. Hyu and the woman go somewhere else, I don't really care because the other woman is too beautiful. I try to talk to her, but she is just standing in the moonlight and looking at me.

I wake up, it is 6 o'clock now. I do a few WILD attempts, but they fail for the usual reasons. I have to make a thread about it sometime.

I wake up in a room I don't know, but I think I am on vacation somewhere. A tiny black cat is with me, I decide to tease her a bit. She plays with me, getting annoyed and lightly biting my fingers. It doesn't hurt, so I continue a bit. From the side my hamster appears, and the cat goes after it. I quickly catch it, being afraid that the cat might eat it. I go downstairs, holding it in my hands. My father and grandma are there, I ask them what to do with the hamster. They don't know either, but then I notice that the hamster and the cat are about the same size. I conclude that the cat is a very young one, so if I let them play together, maybe the cat will grow up to like the hamster.

I am in the living room with 5 other people; PR, J, J, LB, and another guy I don't know. I have to play a duel monsters match at 12 o'clock, but it is still time, so I decide to play against PR. A few turns in, I notice that PR has no clue about the game, so I wonder where he has the good cards from. They belong to the person I don't know, so I challenge him. While we are playing, I notice that J has sneaked away some cards from my graveyard, and I get nervous (J,J and LB used to try to bully me in early highschool). My fears come true, J rips the cards apart. I get furious, and punch J in the face without warning. He falls to the ground, I jump at him, punching him in the head until he doesn't fight back anymore. I get up, J and LB are ready to fight me, they drive me onto the balkony. LB comes first, I simply throw him over the rail (I think we are on the first or second floor). J gets scared and runs away. I look at the clock, and notice it is too late to make it for my match in town.

I am not a violent person, but I might do something like this for real if someone rips apart my cards in front of me.

I am guts from Berserk, traveling through the woods with Puck. Puck is a pig right now, though. We avoid main roads because the authorities and monsters are after us. After a while, we arrive at a weird place. From far away, it looks very empty and liveless, the trees are broken down and rotting, the earth is grey. But after we approach further, a red light engulfs the whole place, and an old town appears. The trees are back to normal, and the town looks ancient. Still, many people are running around. Puck says that time forgot this place. Looking closer, the people are ghosts and the buildings aren't real too. Everything has to perish, but the meaning did remain.

I am at vacation again, this time outside the house. There are too big swimming pools. Some girls on a bench call out "Hey, you!" I turn around, but they say "Not you, sorry." I decide to hit on them anyway, engaging conversation. I notice that two of the girls are wet, while two are not. I say "So some of you were already swimming?" "More like we were forced" Turns out the other two girls have thrown them in. The two girls quickly try to get away after they see me grinning at them, I run after them and throw them into the water. While still at the edge, I get pushed too, but I can still hold my balance barely. I get pushed again, but while falling I grab the hand behind me and draw the culprit with me. We both get out of the water, and he yells at me for dragging him with me. He claims not to have pushed me in, but knows who did it. He shows me the person, but it is a really big guy, so I leave it at that. Another guy asks me if I am good at swimming, I deny it, but he wants to see me taking a header. I somehow manage do do it without stretching my arms in front of me, and dive to the ground. I quickly try to get up again.

I keep dreaming about World of Warcraft, even though I stopped playing a long time ago. Maybe I should start again?

I am at the military, playing Poker against my old superiors. But it isn't a serious game, more like a means to celebrate that my highest superior has arrived safely from war. We play, drink, have fun. The mood is so good, we even drop the honorifics and stuff.

I am walking around with a friend, he says that his other friends keep avoiding him. I spot them on a parking lot, and ask if he remembers the car of his friends. He nods, and we quickly run to their car, before they can get away. They spot us, but it is too late. We hang out a bit, someone mentions that I am wearing a green basecap. I think about what I am wearing, a green basecap, white long t-shirt, white shorts. I remember that I was playing poker some time ago, and think that this clothes fit.

I am in my brother's room, he is playing WoW. He keeps winning pointless battles with his rogue, and thinks he was good at this. I think about making a new character too, and start the game. There is a new race availiable, something like a big, blue, hairy troll, without eyes and with sharp teeth (kinda like the one from Lord of the rings). I decide to check it out, it has weird attributes, and a special ability which involves crashing enemies down with a pushcart.

I am sitting at a big table, and we are playing Go. There are 2 people I don't know, and Hitler, resurrected from the dead. We play a bit, I wonder if I can call Hitler by his first name, as it is common to do so between Go-players. Later, Hitler and some other resurrected guy are playing another game. They have to throw tennis balls into a hole in the wall. The wall around the hole is a big mirror, and inside the whole you can see a big, almost infinite space. Its intersior walls are composed of big black rectangles. Anyway, the person I do not know seems to win, it is Hitler's last chance. He takes the tnnis ball, and enlarges the distance between him and the hole. He throws the ball, making a pose like a baseball pitcher, but misses. The ball rolls back, and he tries again, this time with a normal pose. But he still hits the mirror. I wonder if Hitler will freak out any moment, but he looks very composed. The mirror wall disappeared, now there is a woman fused to a tree, it looks like a human-sized figurehead. She says "Your time is up." Hitler and the other guy get ready to leave again, I think that the woman is something like a supervisor from the afterworld, allowing them to spend a limited time on earth. I have a little chat with Hitler, he seems like a normal person to me. He says that the picture of him in history books is wrong. But I don't care about that, I say that right now he is a likeable person, and anyway I am happy to exchange words with a person most important to recent world history. Then, he leaves with the other person.

I am surprised at my tolerance in dreams. But warped common sense in dreams happens rather often, I think.

My recall is bad right now, but here goes.

I am participating in a kind of game. The setup is: 8 Persons, one dead person, someone is the murderer. Everyone has to deduce who the murderer is. A person who looks like Kaiba from YuGiOh is the gamemaster, explaining the backgroundstories to each character and what they did the past few hours. Oddly enough, everyone has an alibi. My guess is that Kaiba himself is the murderer, so while he is asking the others for ideas, I come up with a scheme. I look at Kaiba, start to laugh, and say "I got it." When I want to state my theory, Kaibe quickly leads the conversation somewhere else. Later, he asks me to state my point, but I feel like letting the game continue, so I say I made a mistake.
Now, we are somewhere outside, the sun is shining. Kaiba anounced, that soon another murder will happen, and one of us will be the victim. The tension is high, everyone in monitoring the other persons movements. I feel like Kaiba has seen through me and came up with this developement, because it is hard for me to watch Kaiba's moves without acting unnatural.

I am playing world of warcraft, riding through the field with my undead horse. I am a rogue, and currently distributing my talent points. In the end, I can't decide between 2% dodge or 1% stamina, and just then I get attacked. I get off my horse, and notice that a mage is casting his big shots at me. I panic, use vanish and sprint to get close to him. I kill him with 2 blows. I notice that he was only around level 15. I see a hunter not far from me, so I get stealthed and approach him. He is a draenei. I think that is pretty weird, because this should still be a 60 level cap server. I let him go, because he is also only level 13. I come up with the reasoning that this server upgraded to a 70 cap server, and everyone is starting anew with the draenei class, hence they flock around me. I head for their starting point.

After a while, I had a really hard time to get to sleep again, so I had a dream where I tried to sleep.

It's been so long since my last entry. I need to get my lazy ass started again, if anyone has tips on forcing myself to do this more frequently, then please do tell me.

I am in front of my house, going down the street. The usual buildings have disappeared, instead, there is only desert. I look to my left, several military jets are performing some weird show, whirling up the sand below them. I walk further down the street, and look to my right. There are big castles made of sand, they look like a child has made them, but just as big as normal castles. I look on the left side again. There is a huge construct made of white construction bars and joints, it looks very geometrical. It is really huge. I ponder about how awesome this dream is, without me doing anything. Being lucid is a blessing. I wake up.

Even though I am lazy as hell right now, lucids still need to be recorded.

I am in a dessert with 3 friends. I see a picture of us taken from a satellite, we are standing next to a really big drawn circle. Haruhi starts speaking to me with telepathy, and says something like "Nice work, don't you agree?" I say "I'll be right there" and start flying to her location. While flying, I pass a town, it looks very vivid. I embrace Haruhi from behind, and say something like this: "You can create worlds, right? Would you be able to create a world with a girl I would be able to love?" She nods. "Would you be able to create a world, where the girl would actually love me back?" She nods. "Would you be able to create a world, where the girl really would love me back, where it isn't just an illusion to me?" I don't get an answer.

Had a weird and quite amusing dream today.

I am in a building with many people, they are from my school. Everyone is calm at first, but soon it looks like the builing is going to crash down. We try to get out, but now we notice that we are in a labyrinth. I am halfway out of it, but I decide to walk back to place which looks suspicious. There are 3 hidden secrets about that place, I find two of them easily, but the third one is quite hard. I feel like I knew the secret once, and I try to remember. Suddenly I notice a rope hanging from the ceiling, and a weird hexagon-shaped ring was attached to it. I pull it down, and a wall next to me drops down. I get out of the building.
I am walking home now, but with eyes closed. I have a violin with me, and I play it while walking. While walking through a city, I barge against someone, and lose my bearings, so I open my eyes and continue. Still playing the violin, I walk past a few other students returning home. First the make fun of me, but soon they like my music and cheer me on. We are in a dark forest now, it has an odd feeling and looks green and violett, venomous. I stop playing, but the others say I should play a new song. I say "this fits for the situation" and play a tune with an evil feel to it. Before us appears a grim reaper, and takes the other students down.
I wake up in a room with other people, we are sitting in chairs arranged in a circle. A teacher is standing next to me, and saying "you have to believe in the unnatural, it is more natural than the naturality you know". He looks at me, takes out a violin and plays the song I was playing in my dream (not the evil tune). It had a few mistakes, so he tries again and plays it right this time. "That was the song from my dream! Were you with me?"

When I woke up, I could recall what the song was like, certainly nothing I knew. But after a while, familiar songs overlapped my memory, so now I don't know anymore. Remembering melodies is even harder than remembering conversations...

I had a few dreams today, but one was so awesome that I forgot the rest.

I am flying around in some city, it is nighttime. The buildings are pretty high. Someone is flying with me, it seems like we are angels. A demon appears, it looks like a gargoyle. We fight it, but we lose and die. Now I am a person inside a building. Monsters are coming from the lower floors, so everyone is heading for the roof.I see many people dying, as I run and climb to the upper floors. On one floor, it is very hard to get to the next one, and I fail hard at climbing at first. I waste much time, and can see the monsters already. Not only that, with the monsters, the is a dark slime coming too, swallowing all life on its way. I get to the roof, with a few other people. They are in fear, and an old man tells me to give his last message to his family if I survive. The monsters are coming, the others decide to fight. I run to the edge and climb down.it is surprisingly easy to climb down, there are many spots to grab, and a big pipe which goes to the ground, I can slide down. Gravity is not bothering me.I get lucid and look around me, the building is really huge, I can't see the ground. I wonder if I should just fly to the ground, but I decide to slide on the pipe, because I do not want to drop the plot of the dream, and soon I lose lucidity again.On the ground, the first thing I do is look for the family the old man was mentioning. I sneak into the house, and somehow get to the children room. I try to not get caught by the mother, and tell the message to one of the boys in the room. After this, I begin to warn people about the monsters and that the end of the world is coming. I am not lucid, but somehow I think that I have lucid powers and therefore have to save the world. My vision switches to third person view, I am now watching myself, and a narrator is telling what happens. A meteor is on its way to crash with the earth, but with technology and science, humanity manages to prevent the disaster. But the sun is getting bigger and bigger after a while, so the humans manage to evacuate to another planet named "Urs". 12 billion years pass while I am protecting the world, and finally, I can die. At the same time, the old earth crashes into the sun.

This dream feels really important, but I do not know what it means.

I can remember 5 dreams today, and in one of them I was lucid.

I am in my old home with my family, and we are waiting for guests. DS and FH arrive, and take a seat in the living room. AS comes by too. Me, my mother and her are talknig in the kitchen about something. Another guest is arriving, it is the big sister of AS, LS. I say "did you bring your whole family?" We let her in, and soon after this her parents arrive too, with two pets. It was a big black dog, and a big brown bear. Everyone goes to the living room, but I stay with the pets wondering what to do. I decide to pet them both, the dog gets really friendly and follows me to the living room. While not really taking part in the conversation, I pet the dog even more, he seems really satisfied. After a while we lock the dog and the bear in the bathroom. AS has gone to the library, I am afraid that she will hunt me down and force me to read the book.

When approaching big and dangerous animals like big dogs I always remind me that I have to be and feel friendly towards them, because animals can feel this.

I arrive at what seems like a battlefield, or Counter-Strike-Map. We are in a building. It looks like a paintball game or something similar is taking place. The people around me encourage me to help them, so I ask a guy above me to give me some weapons. He asks me which ones I want, I say "duals and a big one". He throws down 2 revolvers and a big things which looks like a gatling. All the weapons look futuristic and ancient at the same time. I can hardly manage to carry the gatling, but after trying to find out how it works without success, I drop it stick to one revolver. I see an enemy movement which indicates a rush attack, and yell "They are coming!" Everyone gets alarmed, they ask "Which direction?", I reply "From below" and run there first. CM appears, I shoot his left leg. No real bullets are coming out of the revolver, it is like a bullet made of air. CM admits defeat, MK appears and I hit him in the stomach.

It is night, I am at my old neighborhood, with another person. The person does not seem real, or not like an individual, more like a form. I get lucid and start running towards the street. The person follows me, we talk while running. I tell him that this is a dream, and ask him if he remembers the last dream we were in. He nodds. We arrive at the street and I attempt a really big jump, and while in the air, I feel like flying, so I begin to hover. I look back at the person, he remained at the ground, looking at me. I find it hard to manage staying in the air, I fold my hands and suddenly it is really easy, and I get higher and higher.

I wake up in front of a computer, which is still running. I am wearing a bathrobe. I am wondering what that dream right now was all about, but get distracted by the computer. I try to look at a cinema site, but there is nothing interesting on it. I leave the computer and head for the exit. I am at place I never was before, looks like an apartment. I am here with my cousin and her father. I go outside to catch some fresh air, my cousin follows me. It feels like we should talk about something, but neither me or her start to speak. We head back to our rooms.

I really wake up, cursing false awakenings. But I manage to sleep again.

I am part of the TV-Show "Boston Legal", me and Alan are preparing for a showdown in the courtroom. Alan informs me that the other side is quite tough and hard to handle. We enter the room, it looks nothing like a courtroom. We take a seat at a table, many people are sitting around desks and waiting for something. Finally, someone stands up and says "May the chess championship finals begin!". Many people gather at the middle of the room, spectating the game. But at other tables there are people too, playing chess or Go. I am excited because Go is being played too, and look for an opponent. I even recognize players from my hometown, I greet TN, my old teacher. The first one I approach doesn't want to play with me. But I take a seat at a free desk, and soon another player arrives. I know him too. We start to play, and after a while, strange things happen. Stones are at positions where neither of us played, so I accuse him of cheating. Then, the Go-board is too large, and little figurines move around.

I can't reconstruct the game I played in the dream, but it seems to me that one sequence we played in a corner was accurate.