side notes

I am a small duck dressed in a trench coat and sunglasses. I am a bounty hunter, and am after some guys hanging out inside a night club. It is daytime outside My awareness is positioned outside of my body. I enter the club, and exit carrying some stuff I stole from them. I then get into the car I own in WL, where my awareness now enters my body. I am trying to back up, when one of the thugs moves his car to box me in. I turn the wheel hard, ride up and over the car beside me (not possible at all in WL) and in the process, tear the head off of a thug who was trying to climb in through the back window.

I become lucid, as this is ridiculous and could never happen in real life. I continue driving my car down the street. I am now driving down some hallways (almost like I am in the back of a kitchen or something) and I realize the car is gone. I think to myself, Oh, I'm running now but then have a flash of insight--I'm not doing anything--I'm lying in bed. I also realize I have no body and really haven't had one for quite some time. Furthermore, as I am dreaming, there is really no reason to get a body anyway.

At this point, I decide to test my bodiless-ness and pass through a set of push doors. I bang my forehead against the door, and then just raise my hand and open it! I remember my discussion with dutchraptor and Sensei about pain in dreams, and realize that--as usual--I do not feel any pain from knocking myself in a dream.

I reach an open area, where I am looking down at a helipad. The helipad is about forty or fifty feet below me, and there are numerous helicopters on the ground, propellers spinning. I think that I might jump down into one of the propellors, but then change my mind, as I really have no wish to test being chopped up (dang it!). Instead, I decide to use this high point as a jump off for flying. I leap into the air, but just fall (very swiftly) to the ground. I hit the ground and then fall down on my butt.

I now stand up, look around, and just lift into the air. I fly higher and higher, really not even trying now to do anything, and travel perhaps several hundred feet into the air (that's advanced, right!? ). I then look around, and my body begins to fall. I am momentarily scared, but then remember that I'm not really doing anything, nothing is happening, and there is nothing at all to worry about. I relax, and just hang in mid-air. I then accelerate upwards again. As I am thinking these things, I realize my body is moving of its own accord, flying this way and that. I think this is kind of neat and just observe my body flying. I then relax again, and I this must trigger something with my WL body because I wake up.

On a side note, this dream has caused me to think more about meditation in dream, and has prompted me to concentrate more on my daily practice of sitting, as well as begin to integrate sitting more into my dream practice.

Haven't been around much due to work--it's a 60 hrs plus gig, so not much time for the good stuff. However, here are some of my offerings from last week

(??): I am in a car, flying high above the street. I realize immediately that I am dreaming, and that this is a dreamlet. Despite this knowledge, I nosepinch anyway and lose the dream.

From now on, if I know (and I mean really know) that I am dreaming, the hell with those reality checks. That's the devil tryin' to get in my head!

This morning I visited the doctor to get some blood taken. During the drawing process, I lost consciousness. The time in between was basically lost--I do not have any real solid feeling of "being" anywhere, except some flitting images or colors that my mind was attempting to process. I couldn't even really claim to have had a "self" at this point--basically just a feeling of confusion and bewilderment. In retrospect, I imagine this is what animals must feel like at times, and it was highly . . . disconcerting.

As I began to come out of it, in darkness, I had the distinct feeling of being in both a sitting position and a lying position, and it became crucial to me to understand which of these my body was currently in. Once I was revived (eyes open and conscious) I still did not recognize any of the people there (my doctor and two nurses) or where I was until my doctor explained what had happened. I tried to explain my confusion: "I didn't know where I was!" My doctor very compassionately nodded, as though he understood. Maybe he did. Very unpleasant experience--basically fatigued for the rest of the day with a mild headache.

So here was what came to me: was what I experienced coming out of the state (or within the state? hard to say) an example of what death will "feel" like? If so, I can only say I expect it will be terrible--at least the dying part.

Quick note: I think I have been using MILD as a dream incubation technique, and that using it actually causes my dreams to be weirder, as well as inserting elements that are meant to be incongruent. For instance, focused on the statement, "I want to be lucid in my next dream" and fell asleep. First thing, a friend of mine approaches with a book on "How to be lucid in your next dream." I promptly ignore this information and proceed along my non-lucid path to delusion.