Xanous' Dream Journal

#239 - SSILD/DEILD

I am walking outside with someone. This is something about my shoes and some concern or worry. I realise I was doing SSILD cycles and decide this is a dream but at that moment the scene collapses and I have a false awakening.

I am uncovered and cold and I try to make myself move but I feel really weak and tired. I grab for my DJ but I can't summon the energy to type. My wife wakes up and tells me not to worry and she will do it for me. She takes my device and gets ready. She waits for me to tell her but I can't seem to understand why she doesn't just know. It's all me after all. I become lucid again but fell like I am waking up for real this time.

I lay still and wait for some visuals to come but realize my body feels really odd. My DEILDs and WILDs usually go one of two ways. Visual or physical. This time is seems all physical. Small vibrations start and I focus in on it. This time the vibrations went to a whole new level. Instead of buzzing and tingling it really felt like a powerful wind blowing at me from my right side. I tried moving but really couldn't yet. I noted the sensation was only on my face and upper body and I felt like I could move my feet but I wasn't sure if it was real or dream. The sound and feel of the wind was completely realistic and a little frightening. I wondered if some entity was beside doing something crazy. I forced myself to stay calm and relaxed as possible but my body felt like it was going to roll over on my wife. After a moment I let it happen. I felt my face rest on her bosom and as much as I enjoyed that I decided that's not what this dream was going to be about. I push up with my arms and feel myself standing up.

I am standing in my living room and bright daylight. I am pleased there is no darkness this time but I feel a little unstable. I rub my hands and stoop to feel the hardwood every few steps on my way outside. Once I reach the front porch the dream is stable and mostly vivid. I remember my goal to somehow board the USS Enterprise and take command as Captain.

I look around and see that my house is nestled in the middle of a cluster of beautiful pines trees. I enjoy the view of it for a second but it's ruined when I realize there's other houses and buildings nearby. Time to move on. I tap my communicator badge on my shirt and it lets out the correct corresponding chime. I say, "Kirk here..." I pause because my voice is not my own. It sounds really artificial and funny; close to Shatner but in a goofy sort of way. I speak again tapping my badge, "My voice if funny... Kirk here." I try several times but never get any response. I think, "OK secondary goal" and begin walking down a street.

I reach at my waist to pull out a light saber. The feel and sound of oblige my intention by there is nothing in my hand. I try again really expecting to see a long blade of light but the effect is the same. I look around thinking maybe I could find one. I see a metal trash can next to a tree with a toy lightsaber in it. I start to reach for it but on closer inspection it looks fat and clunky. I suppose in hindsight it would have worked but at the moment I think its all wrong. I think maybe if I could find a rock that is close to the shape of the hilt I could transform it. I quickly pick something up. The shape and wieght of it feels about right. I begin to think about transforming this but something makes want to me turn around.

I realize I am standing in the street and a large bus is speeding toward me. Feeling invincible, I center myself in the street and stand facing it defiantly with both hands on my hips. After a moment I realize the bus isn't going to stop or even slow down. I laugh a little to myself wondering if I will phase through or if I will get stuck on the front like a bug. I feel a hard but painless impact. When I noticed my face stuck the grill I decided I was the bug. I roll over to see the traffic in front of me but the dream is starting to collapse. I focus to visualize and dimly see a traffic like and a few vehicles in front of me but it doesn't want to hold together. I decide to bail. When my feet hit the ground I realize that I the buss was moving pretty fast and my inertia causes me to fall. I roll over on my back and feel the gross but painless feeling of road rash. I let myself flip over a few times and as I am rolling I see a dark blue sky with white steaks almost like some sort of warp speed.

After a moment I gather my senses and stand up. I see that I am on some side street with several cars parallel parked next to me. There are tall buildings and parking meters. The scene reminds me of downtown Kansas City. Then I see the bus at the end the street slowly passing by. I feel pissed at when had happened and want to stop that bus somehow. I see brown truck parked next to me. It's small like a S10 or Ranger. I grab it at the tail gate, lift it over my head and hurl it toward the bus. The distance must have be 50 yards and I thought it was going to miss. Luckily it smacks the rear end of the bus and the driver freaks out. Somehow he swerves back my direction but manages to roll the buss before he reaches me. I see a break in the metal and actually see people inside. There is a man suspended upside down in his seat by a seatbelt. It must have been the driver but I wasn't sure. He looked panicky and in a lot of pain but I could only see minor scraps and bruises. I walk up to him and say, "Don't be such a pussy." I reach forward and push the button to release his seat belt. The dream goes black at that point and I wake up.

I have several other dreams where I became lucid but I woke up right away. One of those dreams I was able to DEILD again. I atempted another physical transtion and began spinning with my arms out. The feeling was exhilarating but lasted only a few seconds.I became distracted by a distorted sound and focus in on it until the sound became clear and less distorted. It took several seconds before I realise its my box fan. I am wide awke.