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    Xanous' Dream Journal

    The Variable-Sword

    5 Comments
    by
    Xanous
    , 12-22-2014 at 05:53 AM (705 Views)
    #392 - WILD - 3:44AM

    Almost an hour WBTB with some meditation and the usual Galantamine dose.

    I focus on body awareness and quickly enter into a very long transition in vibrations and SP. I use every trick I can think of to get the dream going but it's being very stubborn. I forget most of the sensations, but it was all very typical for me and only mildly interesting. Eventually, I find myself floating listlessly above the foot of the bed. I look up and see the floor. I am upside down so I reach for the floor landing on all fours. I crawl out of the bedroom into the living room, heading for the front door. I feel very weak and gravity is extra heavy. The dream is very unstable and non-vivid but it's all I've got right now. I continue to crawl, making very little progress. I know I need to stand, but the thought of it seems impossible. I tell myself, "Don't be a pussy." as I use all my will to stand up.

    As I stagger to the front door I see a line of dead bolts spin to the unlocked position. I was grateful for this, because the thought of manually unlocking all them seems like an impossible task at the moment. I feel hopeful as I reach outside but the dream is still really unstable. I float to the grass in the yard and feel with my hands as I revert back to crawling. I note the texture and feel as my legs drag across long blades. I recall Jenkees' dare to have theatrical music and try to conjure up something. The Indiana Jones Theme song begins to play in my ears. This is all wrong for the moment so I shake the sound out my mind. At this point the dream decides to crash.

    I wake up feeling mentally exhausted and decide to hope for DILD later. I mantra "Remember mindfulness" as I fall back to sleep.

    #393 - DILD - 4:07AM

    Quote Originally Posted by From Ringworld, by Larry Niven.
    "I have a variable-sword," said Speaker-to-Animals. "I urge calm." The kzin stood against a curved wall. In one clawed fist he held something like an oversized jump rope handle. Ten feet from the handle, held expertly at the level of the kzin's eyes, was a small, glowing red ball. The wire which joined ball to handle was too thin to be visible, but Louis didn't doubt it was there. Protected and made rigid by a Slaver stasis field, the wire would cut through most materials including the back of Louis's crash couch.
    I am at an old slave house back in the 1800's. The door is boarded up but I manage to breakthrough. I feel compassion and want to free them all. I load everyone up into covered wagon and try to think of a way to get them to the underground railroad.

    I have a mini wake-up but fall right back to sleep. I am now in a mixture of my basement and the old dirt floor garage from a house I lived in as a child. I am mindlessly digging up the dirt floor wanting to make a tunnel. As I do this I recall the previous dream. I notice how odd it is that the dirt just vanishes as I dig. It's very minecraft-life. After a moment I pause and stare out a window in a door. Something feels off. I remember to be mindful and quickly recognize this as a dream.

    I step outside now unconcerned with digging. I quickly recall one of my goals. I want to revisit the lightsaber play from a non-lucid dream that I had last week while taking another stab at the theatrical music. Recalling the visuals, I blind summon a red lightsaber and give it a few spins. It looks good at first but the light quickly fades out as I walk around the house. I come around the side and see a very strange and distorted version of my Dodge with all sorts of attachments jutting out from the sides.

    I look at my lightsaber, but it only look like a laser pointer as I stare at a red dot on the driveway. I decide this is ok because it is now a variable-sword like the one in Ringworld. I flick my wrist and make a cut at one of the chrome appendages on the car. I see it slice a very thin line but it doesn't fall off. I go ahead and give a tap making the thing drop away. I make another slash at the side-view mirror with the same effect. Ok that's kind of cool. Now I need my music. I try to summon something, but all I get is random humming in my head that sounds pretty weak and ridiculous. I let it go for now and wonder around with my sword.

    To my left, I see smoke from a something like a brush pile, and to my right, I see a tree covered with Christmas lights. I am torn between the two; looking back-and-forth. This seems to do something strange with my eyes causing my eyelids to flit open, waking me up.
    NyxCC and CanisLucidus like this.

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    Comments

    1. NyxCC's Avatar
      Congrats on the lds and the lightsaber fun!

      Hmm, I wonder if your post first ld mentally exhausted feeling might have been translated into extra gravity in the dream. Something similar happened to me after a super exhausting wbtb once.

      Your mantra seems to be quite effective, do you use it during the day too?
      Xanous and CanisLucidus like this.
    2. Xanous's Avatar
      Congrats on the lds and the lightsaber fun!

      Hmm, I wonder if your post first ld mentally exhausted feeling might have been translated into extra gravity in the dream. Something similar happened to me after a super exhausting wbtb once.
      Thanks.

      I'm sure there is something to that.

      Your mantra seems to be quite effective, do you use it during the day too?
      Quote Originally Posted by CanisLucidus
      What I do is try to internalize the attitude that I'll have many dreams every night and that they'll feel very much as waking life does now, but that if I look for them at the right time, I can find them. And furthermore, I keep it firmly in my mind that there's great joy both in the process of seeking and finding the dream.

      Whenever it occurs to me to do so, I think of lucid dreaming and spend a moment reflecting on how happy lucid dreaming makes me while I look for the dream in what I see around me. Is it here? No? Well, it will be soon, and it'll be awesome.

      I especially do this when I find myself experiencing any slight negative feelings like stress or social anxiety. As a nice side effect, it forces me outside of my head to examine this world that I'm a part of and see whether it's all my own creation.

      I think that the joy of these moments is a big part of what's made it work for me. It feels easy, peaceful, relaxed, but with this sense of happy anticipation. Like dreams are coming very soon, and it's good to be ready. I hope that helps give some idea of what I do!
      It's kind of based off CanisLucidus' idea above except, it's less about the emotion of getting lucid, but more about meditation and mindfulness during the day while mentally linking it to lucid dreaming. I figured I should be able to try to remind myself to do it 'later' as I fall asleep. Of course, these things are much easier with galantamine.

      BTW much like CL mentioned, mindfulness and meditation is a great way to relieve negative emotions and thoughts that arise during the day. I simply allow them to play themselves out without taking any action. It's like when you meditate, you watch thoughts arise but don't engage yourself with them. It's not a suppression of thought or emotion, but an opening and yielding so that it flows freely without taking effect. Well, most of the time; I am still learning. As for linking it to dreaming, it just raises awareness and quiets the mind, making you more aware and observant.
      NyxCC and CanisLucidus like this.
    3. NyxCC's Avatar
      I really like how you guys have personalized your mantras and that they can apply to both the dream and the real world.

      BTW much like CL mentioned, mindfulness and meditation is a great way to relieve negative emotions and thoughts that arise during the day. I simply allow them to play themselves out without taking any action. It's like when you meditate, you watch thoughts arise but don't engage yourself with them. It's not a suppression of thought or emotion, but an opening and yielding so that it flows freely without taking effect. Well, most of the time; I am still learning. As for linking it to dreaming, it just raises awareness and quiets the mind, making you more aware and observant.
      This is great stuff. I think we can all benefit a lot from such an attitude. Thanks for the reminder!

      And Merry Xmas!
      Xanous and CanisLucidus like this.
    4. CanisLucidus's Avatar
      Nice man, congratulations on the successful G night! It's great getting caught back up on your DJ... you've been having some good successes! Nice job remembering the epic soundtrack dare from Jenkees. That's a great one!

      Great lightsaber play, and your mindfulness/mantra is working great! Thank you very much for this timely reminder... I've been so caught up in waking life lately that I've really let the daytime work that you quoted slip quite a lot. This is good inspiration to get it back... thank you!

      And LOL... when NyxCC said:

      Quote Originally Posted by NyxCC
      Your mantra seems to be quite effective, do you use it during the day too?
      I at first thought she was referring to:

      I tell myself, "Don't be a pussy."
      Xanous likes this.
    5. Xanous's Avatar
      Oh boy, I have really let this slip myself. It's not easy stay so focused all the time. My mind gets really restless and tired. And yes, I could probably use the other daytime mantra as well
      CanisLucidus likes this.