OMG Let's rap battle!

[Universal Mind]

Jeff777. Sorry, but his skillz were vastly superior (but not as good as mine ). Jeff is really good, but we already knew that. I was very impressed with the skill Amaze showed. Somehow I don't think that was his first time to do this stuff. Cold Blooded, nice work. I'm going to go round up a few barrels of whip ass and return later today to pick up my crown. Make sure you have it looking the way I demanded. Don't procrastinate.

[Identity X]

Jeff is really good If Jeff777 thinks he's really good, He should pay a visit to my neighborhood. Compared to me Jeff is just driftwood. I could rhyme a thousand times than he ever could. And is rapping my only talent? No, my genius will never relent. From New Jersey to Kansas; from Moscow to Tashkent; I am the master, I am the godsent. At chatting up girls, there is none cooler; I know more numbers than Leonhard Euler. * You repluse a girl, you cannot fool her; 'Cos she knows that at loving, I am the ruler. My Blackjack skills, I know when to hold; Origami? Just count my folds! At Risk I am decisive and bold. Monopoly? What can I say, I'm sold. And I'm not just talking about toy money. I'm so filthy rich it isn't funny. Living in the land of milk and honey, Where the sky is blue and the days are sunny. And Jeff777 is so poor he don't eat; Living rough, in the pavements and streets. As for me, I'm the highway elite, Got so many cars, I don't use my feet. And another loser, Universal Mind; His talents will be lost in time. Forever my talents, my skills are divine, Your pathetic words pale to mine. I am the master, I am the best; Stronger than a Kevlar vest. I am the one, you are the rest, Left to die in a dreary mess. Damn I'm good. *This one raised a self-satisfied smirk or two

[Quiver]

Sorry to interupt amateur night, I been sent here to deliver Closest y'all come to spotlight is standing next to Quiver. Its true y'all actually brought me outta lurking Cause half of your half-baked rhymes got me smirking Take a seat, relax. Sit back. Try to shrug it off My rhymes send you to Clarity's thread, tryin to hug it off Some of you rhyme warm, rhyme weak, flow like river I flow like storm (Katrina was my baby sister) Sinister, what I do with this mic, they call me enchanter Its a crime my rhymes reside in the realms of senseless banter. Who's gonna step it up? I know none can handle this Topping the top 10 list cause Bin Laden call me terrorist Ridiculous. Why am I even standing here? Y'all doing it for lulz while I'm seeking record deals. I'll make it clear I'll keep it short, i'll keep it fair How you gonna pit these dreamers against the nightmare?

[Oneironaut Zero]

Oh, now you're getting hotter, getting your back up, But you just make me chuckle, chortle, then crack up. You spit a good rap, I'll give you that for sure, But when you're up against me you best be sure that your shit is pure. I've seen you around the States, kickin' ass and takin' names, You seem invincible, inapprehensible, a master of the War games. Thing is, I got you beat. I'm bigger, stronger, and faster to boot, And I'll not hesitate to bring the heat, just representing the resolute. So bring out the big guns, break out your chains, whatever you like, 'Cause after tonight your ass is mine, you freak in black and white. First I'll rip K7-Leetha right out of your burnt-out pores, Shred it to bits and use the pieces to keep track of the score. Then we'll see who's the man beneath the mask, And go toe-to-toe with a thunderous clash. In the light of the sun, my hand is stronger than any, In the dark of the night, your burnt mess of a face would scare your granny. Necroplasm is gonna fly tonight till the break of dawn 'Cause I know something you seem to have missed, Spawn; This here, this site, this thread... This is The Deadzone. Yo, Clark, or whatever you're disguising your name as, you should bow for having wasted my time with your lame ass attempts at taking me down - a feat that's unheard of, And just look at little Steel, now. Kid got lyrically murda'd. It's time to put the nail up in the kryptonite coffin, humanize the hero and remind this bitch who is boss is. I really hate to do it to you, Steel, I must say, but you're as Doomed as Truth, Justice, and the American Way. Yeah, I know that in the Sun your power is at its greatest, but I'm 'bout to scorch your sky just like they did in the Matrix. I know you're partial to your pretty-boy features, but my face has placed me 'mong your top nightmare creatures. And that's all good with me, since I'm so stuck in your head, that every time you think of me, you're fuckin' pissing the bed. If I had to combat rhymes like mine, I'd hide out in Smallville, too. Cause sticks and stones can't break your bones, but bitch my words just killed you!

[Jeff777]

Identity, you're not bad man, not bad at all But you asked for it.. If Jeff777 thinks he's really good, He should pay a visit to my neighborhood. Compared to me Jeff is just driftwood. I could rhyme a thousand times than he ever could. And is rapping my only talent? No, my genius will never relent. From New Jersey to Kansas; from Moscow to Tashkent; I am the master, I am the godsent. At chatting up girls, there is none cooler; I know more numbers than Leonhard Euler. * You repluse a girl, you cannot fool her; 'Cos she knows that at loving, I am the ruler. My Blackjack skills, I know when to hold; Origami? Just count my folds! At Risk I am decisive and bold. Monopoly? What can I say, I'm sold. And I'm not just talking about toy money. I'm so filthy rich it isn't funny. Living in the land of milk and honey, Where the sky is blue and the days are sunny. And Jeff777 is so poor he don't eat; Living rough, in the pavements and streets. As for me, I'm the highway elite, Got so many cars, I don't use my feet. And another loser, Universal Mind; His talents will be lost in time. Forever my talents, my skills are divine, Your pathetic words pale to mine. I am the master, I am the best; Stronger than a Kevlar vest. I am the one, you are the rest, Left to die in a dreary mess. Damn I'm good. *This one raised a self-satisfied smirk or two -smiles and looks at the fresh meat challenging me- Battling you Identity, is an insult to my rep To spit those last rhymes? It's clear you asked Ranma for help What the hell is up your name anyway? If you're confused about your "identity" Rest assured kid, you're gay Believe me or not, I'll give you a suggestion son Run a blacklight over your lips Your sure to find a lot of cum To sum up the plot of why you're poor and why I'm not You suck dick for 5 bucks in the wal-mart parking lot You let your customers cum in your mouth If they got some extra cash And also if they pull it out Before cumming in your ass Now let's flip the script see and show you why I'm paid alot It's no mystery I fired your mom, then hired her as a maid to suck my cock I own the job she works at, I own her car and home too I own the income the furnishings..hell kid I even own you But unlike Spart and CB, nah kid I'm not your father I'm just her "friday" fuck buddy, and when I'm done with you I'll call her Don't bother, trying to save mommy or her job Cause she's making more money on friday's by slobbing on my knob A bit of a slob it's true, did I tell you she gives great head too? Infact, she told me she learned her dick sucking skills from you If that rhyme that you said made you to raise a "smirk or two" I'm sure THIS ONE wiped it off, no applause, I do what I do. Don't worry though kid, I went easy on your ass But if you hit me back... I'll put harsh rhymes through your chest so fast It'll shatter that "kevlar" like paper thin glass And if that happens you know you'll get you 7 years of bad luck No worries though, life can't get any worse for a fuck up It's time to end this round, but before I let you go? That last guy you sucked off was a cop, so you should know... that your final hell is a jail cell you faggot so... Be happy though, Indentity seriously, the tears have got to stop Here I'll tell you one last thing sure to make you drop Remember that last guy you sucked which happened to be a cop? The DNA tests came back positive...the guy you blew was your pop. Edit: 16 bars I know I know! but I felt I could go over because my "competitor" went over 16 bars

[Grod]

Man Jeff you just keep getting better

[suttsman]

Sorry to interupt amateur night, I been sent here to deliver Closest y'all come to spotlight is standing next to Quiver. Its true y'all actually brought me outta lurking Cause half of your half-baked rhymes got me smirking Take a seat, relax. Sit back. Try to shrug it off My rhymes send you to Clarity's thread, tryin to hug it off Some of you rhyme warm, rhyme weak, flow like river I flow like storm (Katrina was my baby sister) Sinister, what I do with this mic, they call me enchanter Its a crime my rhymes reside in the realms of senseless banter. Who's gonna step it up? I know none can handle this Topping the top 10 list cause Bin Laden call me terrorist Ridiculous. Why am I even standing here? Y'all doing it for lulz while I'm seeking record deals. I'll make it clear I'll keep it short, i'll keep it fair How you gonna pit these dreamers against the nightmare? Ah, a new challenger. I've been away from this thread as of late, so, sure, I'll battle. 3 rounds, 16 bar maximum, and for God's sake, please be better than Ramna. Here it goes... *ahem* Hey, look everyone, it's a new face in town I just stepped up, son, I'm here to bring you down Your words don't even rhyme, they barely even flow You think you bring the heat? I'll bury you in snow! They call you Enchanter, right, well that's a total heap Your bunch of boring rhymes put us real rappers to sleep You flow like a storm? Well your storm is a disaster, You say I flow "warm", while I'm really your master All I see is ego, pouring out like hot steam You beating Me? HAH! That's only a dream You ain't really anywhere as good as you seem Cause by the second round, I'll have you effin' creamed! Ha!

[CallMeManFlesh]

Fucking amatuers.

[Jeff777]

Oneironaut: Wow dude, I loved that last rhyme! Quiver, you're like pizza, you deliver...good job man sutts, dude that flow against quiver was sweet! Man Jeff you just keep getting better Thanks man haha, you should step in and flex your muscles...it's inevitable that people get better when battling, ranma's improved, sutts, me, xox etc...you should step in!

[Xox]

Fucking amatuers. Ok Mr. Last off the bench, why don't you show us what you got instead of sayin that?

[Oneironaut Zero]

Fucking amatuers. Ooh. A "professional." Wanna go a few rounds?

[Xox]

Ooh. A "professional." And you'll NEVER guess who it is!

[Oneironaut Zero]

And you'll NEVER guess who it is! By his overuse of "Street," I don't really have to guess. But if it's who I think it is, I've seen his rhymes before, and he's about to make an ass of himself. So, come on challenger. Hit me so we can get this over with before your re-banning. If you hurry we can get round one out of the way before I head out to the movies. [Edit: Too late. Re-banned.]

[Xox]

If you hurry we can get round one out of the way before I head out to the movies. [Edit: Too late. Re-banned.] Damn I wanted to see him get owned.

[Identity X]

bla bla bla Jeff, I admit, I understated your wealth; You're paid to advertise sexual health. A hundred infections literally under your belt. 'Cos you're a common whore, out sellin' yourself. You got those diseases when sleeping around, To the men in the street, you're just an ass to pound. They sodomise you then turn you around, You suck their dick as they hold you down. Sorry if these rhymes are incredible crude; But I heard you like it dirty, you like it rude; You'd have sex for money, you'd suck dick for food. But as well as your ass, your head is screwed. You think you can rhyme better than me? My albums go platinum, you can't sell yours for free; You bling yourself up, but it's a loser they see, Stick to your talents, yes that's sodomy.

[Jeff777]

Jeff, I admit, I understated your wealth; You're paid to advertise sexual health. A hundred infections literally under your belt. 'Cos you're a common whore, out sellin' yourself. You got those diseases when sleeping around, To the men in the street, you're just an ass to pound. They sodomise you then turn you around, You suck their dick as they hold you down. Sorry if these rhymes are incredible crude; But I heard you like it dirty, you like it rude; You'd have sex for money, you'd suck dick for food. But as well as your ass, your head is screwed. You think you can rhyme better than me? My albums go platinum, you can't sell yours for free; You bling yourself up, but it's a loser they see, Stick to your talents, yes that's sodomy. Since you're slow at perception I'll tell the readers about your life He turned to masturbation when he caught me screwing his wife He caught me doing it right, turned to her and then he said "Shit Rachel! I didn't know you took cocks that big!" Well she DID, cause I'm done with her, but wile I had my fun with her? I videotaped the sex, and sent a copy to your grandmother Now you know why grandma smiles when I'm around And why she takes her teeth out, whenver I'm in town If he wants another round I'm not down Unless you come with your casket, so I can put it in the ground But going back to your mom..I bet the readers wanna know What happened to the video of me and that bangable hoe Well here's the story, so don't get lost and keep up dude After I finished recording... I sent a copy to youtube You can check it out now readers, it received a million hits I gave you a shoutout Identity, while cumming on her tits Identity's wreckless readers, so it's best that he wise up And get a penis pump, like his muscles he needs to size up Come round 3? Nah it's best that you quit now Your spit is still shit but do your thing and take a bow You managed afterall to make it this long But where I'm going to send you? No "E.T. can help you phone home" Time to end round 2, I think I've made myself clear Quiver says he's your nightmare, bitch I'm YOUR nightmare here Nowhere to run and nowhere to hide, consider me your gravest fears I'll take you to your grave half alive Your hearts dying beat the reaper hears...

[Man of Steel]

Yo, Clark, or whatever you're disguising your name as, you should bow for having wasted my time with your lame ass attempts at taking me down - a feat that's unheard of, And just look at little Steel, now. Kid got lyrically murda'd. It's time to put the nail up in the kryptonite coffin, humanize the hero and remind this bitch who is boss is. I really hate to do it to you, Steel, I must say, but you're as Doomed as Truth, Justice, and the American Way. Yeah, I know that in the Sun your power is at its greatest, but I'm 'bout to scorch your sky just like they did in the Matrix. I know you're partial to your pretty-boy features, but my face has placed me 'mong your top nightmare creatures. And that's all good with me, since I'm so stuck in your head, that every time you think of me, you're fuckin' pissing the bed. If I had to combat rhymes like mine, I'd hide out in Smallville, too. Cause sticks and stones can't break your bones, but bitch my words just killed you! Good one, O! A'ight, that's three rounds and I'm pretty sure I got creamed. Somebody judge... Damn I wanted to see him get owned. Hehe, me too.

[AmazeO XD]

Ah, a new challenger. I've been away from this thread as of late, so, sure, I'll battle. 3 rounds, 16 bar maximum, and for God's sake, please be better than Ramna. Here it goes... *ahem* Hey, look everyone, it's a new face in town I just stepped up, son, I'm here to bring you down Your words don't even rhyme, they barely even flow You think you bring the heat? I'll bury you in snow! They call you Enchanter, right, well that's a total heap Your bunch of boring rhymes put us real rappers to sleep You flow like a storm? Well your storm is a disaster, You say I flow "warm", while I'm really your master All I see is ego, pouring out like hot steam You beating Me? HAH! That's only a dream You ain't really anywhere as good as you seem Cause by the second round, I'll have you effin' creamed! Ha! I can't wait to do it this one....... You talk about heat? You talk about snow? Well listen up bitch, you don't even know. I rhyme so fast, you rhyme so slow. i'm packin the heat, i'm burning on fire, your time is about up, you're about to expire. Anyone who wants to battle, i'll do it all day, Then at the end of it all, I'll smoke up a jay. I rap in my sleep, i sleep while I rap, the shit that you're saying, it's all the same crap, that the little noobies say, when they're startin out, and when they lose a rap battle, they scream and shout. They can't admit, that there rhymes are shit, and that they don't know, how to deal with it. Some people, they don't like my style, but they just afraid, cause if you look at their file, under parents, you don't even need to bother, because you'll see my name, listed under father. cause i fuck all these ladies, and i fuck em all right, I rock em till the dawn, till they pussies aint tight. They sweat and they twitch, cause my sex is torn, about nine months later, a baby is born. That baby is you, and your sister too. So what you gonna do? Do you even have a clue? So what if I talk dirty, I don't need to talk clean, cause when i talk shit, I'm extra mean. I got alot of lines, i can fucking see, but you know what bitch? You'll NEVER be me! WOOOOOT Haha.. all in good fun. Dont' take any of the shit I say litterally.

[AmazeO XD]

Anyone want to battlez me? ANYONE at all.

[Jeff777]

AmazeO, take someone by the horns and hit first...the challenge being issued is a rap AT them lol. And yes we do need someone to judge...someone unbiased, someone who probably hasn't participated...howabout Grod or Gestalt_Alteration? Someone whose active in this thread though so the judging process isn't slow and being waited on.

[CoLd BlooDed]

Whoever becomes the judge should judge all the prior battles too, and announce winners. Just saying. One of us should make a thread in the lounge and compile all the previous rap battles in order. I could try it when I'm not so baked. Sound good?

[Jeff777]

Whoever becomes the judge should judge all the prior battles too, and announce winners. Just saying. One of us should make a thread in the lounge and compile all the previous rap battles in order. I could try it when I'm not so baked. Sound good? Hells yeah! Make it look all fancy and whatnot EDIT: I ran across mark75 last night and he said you chickened out on him in your battle against him :p

[CoLd BlooDed]

I had bigger matters to attend to at that point. Once I read UMs final response I'll step to Mark. Should be target practice. And thanks UM, I worked hard on that one. I await your Canadian stereotype filled rap attack.

[Man of Shred]

No worries, O, you're good. I'll use the reprieve to deal with this little gnat that keeps coming back for more swattin'. What the hell do you call that? My grandmother could freestyle a better rap. Did you suddenly contract a mental disorder, Or are you this dumb from some court order? If you're going to steal my girlfriend, first make sure I've got one— That's your sister, you sick freak, who have you not done? Murder my rhymes? With what, your pathetic lyricry? Come on, son, you're like a horrific mimicry Of my insane mad skillz with impeccable flow and precision And smooth cool words like Lando Calrissian. I can't be beat, I know no equal and no defeat. You can try all day but you'll be left cold in the street. Need a real man to direct your stream, or are you just gay and want a treat? Better aim when you piss, you're dripping it on your feet. If you've got any smarts at all, you'll bow out now, Intelligence is to know you're the laughingstock of the show. I'm washing my hands of you now; I've beat you enough. I'll be generous, though, and let you rebuff. But if you want to come back yet one more time, You'd better bring a slopjar to hold your shitty rhyme. alright muther fucker this time it's personal. I'll kill you and your family that there won't be a funeral. first off you rap at me about a girfriend you don't even have. then you cuss me out for a sister that I don't even have. stop squirming dude and lay your head on that concrete slab. cause i'm gonna stomp your fucking teeth out so fucking bad now in the rules it's called 3 rounds can you even count? dude i'm on it. for your birthday i should buy you hooked on phonics. i think your brain is mush from smokin too much chronic. I kindly back away from calling you gay. then you break your own rules in your own way. sure i'm gay, i raped your ass with no condom when you passed out yesterday. and now your gonna die in in 6 months in the meanest way. oh boy you've fucked with the wrong angry ass rapper today. I know I'm the laughing stock. i can't even talk to a girl 'cause i fear i have a small cock. i have no friends, and everyone raps against me even if i get a little better, i get no credit you see I know i'm fucking different that i can't be normal. I've tried so hard to fit in but it's just too impossible. instead i gotta call all you mother fuckers out. who gang up on people who can't even win a round. i think you should pick on someone a little more challenging your bullying is shamefull no wonder there's people like marilyn manson I won't stop EVER no matter how hard you beat me Even from the grave there's no safe place from me

[Jeff777]

Ranma...dude...I needed that laugh...I literally...dropped tears from laughing so fucking hard...god I love you man, thank you so much for that!!!