Thread: Having sadist dreams. Just need some sort of possible clarification

Shadowofwind, After reading what you wrote, I thought about it, and came up with a better explanation for my case anyway - I do not know whether it applies for mental stasis, but maybe also?

No, I do not have a hidden desire for sadism, what I have a desire for is to overcome emotional masochism. I get depressed, and while in a sense maybe I am sadistic but toward myself, and just emotionally. I tell myself that I am worthless, and insecure, and too tired, and sick, and too stressed to function. I take anything that occurs then personally, whenever anyone is annoyed I interpret it as my fault.

So for me my sadist dream of pleasure killing others with machine gun was empowering because it was a letting go dream, a dream without guilt, a dream where I was not attacking myself for a change. I was in a position of liberated power not weakness.

And similarly my enjoyment of serial killer mysteries is part of my victim mentality. And sometimes I enjoy trying to free myself from that and so sometimes I may look at the other extreme, not because I am comfortable there, but because it liberates me from the extreme I naturally gravitate toward.

Thought about it some more, and alas other dream characters in dreams often represent aspects of dreamer's personality, so even when I attack others in dreams I am still attacking myself, in self destructive manner, so any sense of empowerment gained from that is an illusion - when I win, I also loose; I am both perpetrator and victim.