Lmao. Sero, that's probably the closest possible substitute. 
I also love the counter-argument the Washington Post put out, attacking the (obviously satirical) claim that 'pizza is being made a vegetable', by saying 'it's just the sauce, and it's not unhealthy!' Note that they say nothing about how tomatoes are fruits, and that there is very little to suggest that these processed pizzas are doing anything to provide kids with their recommended servings of vegetables - ontop of giving them all that other crap that isn't healthy. They are just like "what, pizzas aren't been declared vegetables! People who can't see this are stupid, 'nanny-state' advocates!"
No, Congress did not declare pizza a vegetable - The Washington Post
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