Thread: Obsessive Daydreaming

Do you daydream a lot? I mean, like, A LOT? Then you might just be a maladaptive daydreamer. Here are some inserts from some web sights I know:
http://http://wildminds.ning.com
http://http://www.socialanxietysuppo...r-head-456169/

Symptoms Of MD

There are not any conclusive symptoms of MD, since it's not an official diagnosis, but in view of the research available, there are a few signs that be related to MD:

1. Daydreaming excessively in a way that is often compared to an addiction.

2. This excessive daydreaming often begins in childhood.

3. Books, movies, music, video games, and other media may be a daydreaming trigger.

4. The daydreaming itself is often detailed and elaborate, sometimes compared to a movie or novel.

5. Repetitive movements while daydreaming are common (but not always present in sufferers) — pacing, rocking, spinning, shaking something in their hand, etc.

6. They may sometimes talk, laugh, cry, gesture, or make facial expressions as they daydream. People suffering from this know the difference between daydreaming and reality, and do not confuse the two; this makes them distinctly different from psychotics or schizophrenics.

7. Some people will lie in bed for hours daydreaming, and may either have difficulty going to sleep because of this, or have difficulty getting out of bed once awake. They may also neglect basic functions such as regular meals, showering, and other daily activities because of their daydreaming.

Maladaptive Daydreaming is not an officially recognized condition yet. We’re still learning a lot about it. Here are some of the main symptoms that seem to be emerging:
• You daydream more often than you think is normal.
• You’ve built up a character(s) that’s an idealized version of yourself
• You feel more empowered in your daydreams.
• You’re starting to enjoy daydreaming better than the real world.
• Daydreaming is starting to interfere with your day-to-day activities.
• You might enact some movement, like pacing or moving your hands, (though not everyone does this).

Maladaptive Daydreamers have many gifts along with struggles.
Pros:
-extreme creativity
-the ability to think through complex issues on our own
-the ability to see issues from many perspectives (we can have intense dialogs in our own minds)
-the ability to think quickly
-strength. (It takes a lot of strength to live in two worlds at once.)
-insightful and empathetic
-loving (Even when no one's around, we still have people to love in our minds.)

Cons:
-extreme difficulty concentrating
-forgetful
-sluggish. It's hard to be productive when you just want to daydream
-clumsy and awkward
-difficulty cultivating or maintaining relationships (This may not apply to everyone, but if your MD starts to progress, you may prefer daydreaming to real interactions)
-difficulty completing tasks due to desire to constantly stop and daydreaming
-difficulty reaching certain milestones because of constant desire to stop and daydream.

Well now that you mention it I have had a few of those signs and symptoms... I just thought I was borderline schizo
Seriously though I never really thought of what I do as "daydreaming" but I guess it could be considered the same thing. I often talk to (and answer) myself... In my head or out loud. Tell myself stories from the past, go through odd "what if this happened", "what if I had handled x situation a different way" scenarios, or make detailed plans that I will forget or never follow through on. I have been known to stare off into space, change facial expressions or laugh, but I don't think I do any of the other physical signs. It's not generally a visual thing, more of a line of thought or dialog in my head. Helps me through times of boredom and doing repetitive tasks. I don't consider myself sluggish or clumsy although I can be a bit forgetful at times. I do have a bit of difficulty concentrating / completing tasks because my mind will go to something else that's "more important" or at least more interesting to me like personal projects, video games, random topics to ponder, etc... But I think that only applies to especially boring things I'm doing like homework when I was in school or sometimes paperwork at my job (which I don't do a lot of). As a child I was diagnosed with ADHD.

Oh crap, I'm pretty sure I sound just like what you described.

I am a maladaptive day-daydreamer, and for me I have a very complex story with intricate locations, characters, and events that I seem to build on most of my time. Basically, what I'm saying is that to me, this world is boring, so I created my own...

I've had this ever since I was a little kid, creating detailed characters and building ongoing stories about them in my head. It used to bother me but I've come to terms with it now.

One of my lucid dream goals is meeting my current story's main character. I'm curious if any of you MD-ers have accomplished this!

Yup, that's me. Read the user title.
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When I was a kid every now and then I would slip into OBEs from daydreaming, it's what really made me so interested in dreams and hallucinations. That stopped happening so much as I got older but I still daydream all the frickin' time. It's far from my only addictive habit though, so I think it's just a part of my personality, but I guess they're all kind of connected too. I have a really oversexed mindset so all of my daydreams center around pushing sensual pleasures to the breaking point, with lots of extreme emotions, psychedelic architecture, magical themes, and so on.... I actually really loved using hallucinogens because it brings that inner world into my outer reality, but lucid dreaming really is the best thing for it.

But yeah, every single thing you've listed describes me exactly. Especially with various media being triggers and having them be detailed and elaborate. The repetitive movements I'm not entirely sure about... maybe sometimes but not severely, I think anyway. >.> (Edit: Scratch that, the pacing does it. I pace while daydreaming ALL the time.) But the thing about laughing, gesturing, making faces, and so on is something I do a lot. My dad thinks I'm crazy for it. There are a lot of things about it that I like but also some that I don't, but it's definitely influenced my life in a major way.

When I was a kid, I told my mom that I live in three worlds: the world of my own imagination, other people's imaginations (books and movies), and reality, and of the three reality is my least favorite. But no, I don't believe I have this disorder because it does not interfere with my real life - or alternatively, I am so far gone that I am in denial.

Oh, the pacing. I pace around all the time while I'm daydreaming; it's the main thing I wish I could stop because it's what makes me feel the most like I'm crazy. I'm always terrified that someone might catch me. Come to think of it, my mom told me she was always terrified I'd turn out schizophrenic... I wonder if this is why.

I once beat up a DC for tricking me into thinking she was one of my story characters in a lucid dream. I felt horrible about it afterward and it made me realize that I probably have some healing to do here.

I know exactly what you mean! I myself thought I would turn out schizophrenic because of it. My dad also says I walk around the house like a caged animal, but he just doesn't get it lol. Honestly, I've just sort of accepted that it is how I am, and I openly tell people about it. I like being quirky. It's better than holding back who you are from fear of disapproval! If someone can't deal with who you are then it's their problem. That's what I've been thinking lately, anyway. >.>

I'm super violent in my dreams too. I think it's just a release of all that stored up energy, and they're just dreams so I don't let them get to me. Even when you're lucid you're not in the same state of mind as when you're awake, and you know when you're lucid that there are no consequences to any of your actions and no damages done to anyone. So I just use those times as a way to let go, it's therapeutic.

This is interesting. It never crossed my mind that people other than me (and the real crazies) do these things, but it makes sense. I don't have the story characters that some of you talk about though. Scenarios usually involve me and/or real people I know, or if it doesn't involve me then it's just some random nameless person purely used as a hypothetical example. Like I said it's not usually a very visual process for me... I'm not that good at visualization, it kind of flashes in and out, so anything really detailed is pretty much pointless and I'd have better luck writing down a description. Any dialog I have is kind of just directed at "the other side of my brain" which will then come back with agreement or a different perspective. Sounds so weird to write this out, lol. I honestly never put that much thought into it all. It doesn't seem to negatively affect my life in any way, if anything it's a product or corollary of me being kind of a loner.

Amiana, I think I'll trade your pacing for my talking to and answering myself. Talk about awkward when someone catches you. And it's never understandable things like "okay and this wire goes here, now flip the switch..." No, it'll be some completely random discussion about world history or religion or something. I mean I get why I talk out loud, it's because my internal monolog is screwed up and sometimes I get lost (or talk over myself? lol) and have to start over if I can't actually hear what's being said.

Originally Posted by duke396

This is interesting. It never crossed my mind that people other than me (and the real crazies) do these things, but it makes sense. I don't have the story characters that some of you talk about though. Scenarios usually involve me and/or real people I know, or if it doesn't involve me then it's just some random nameless person purely used as a hypothetical example. Like I said it's not usually a very visual process for me... I'm not that good at visualization, it kind of flashes in and out, so anything really detailed is pretty much pointless and I'd have better luck writing down a description. Any dialog I have is kind of just directed at "the other side of my brain" which will then come back with agreement or a different perspective. Sounds so weird to write this out, lol. I honestly never put that much thought into it all. It doesn't seem to negatively affect my life in any way, if anything it's a product or corollary of me being kind of a loner.

Amiana, I think I'll trade your pacing for my talking to and answering myself. Talk about awkward when someone catches you. And it's never understandable things like "okay and this wire goes here, now flip the switch..." No, it'll be some completely random discussion about world history or religion or something. I mean I get why I talk out loud, it's because my internal monolog is screwed up and sometimes I get lost (or talk over myself? lol) and have to start over if I can't actually hear what's being said.

I can relate to everything you said in this post and your first one, except not having good visualization. My visualization is detailed enough to drive me a little nuts sometimes. I talk to myself ALL the time, and yes, it's also to the other side of my brain. I actually had a friend in high school who I told about it and who was always interested in seeing which part of me I was at any given time; we're still really close friends today. My two sides are extreme polar opposites of each other, though they work together well. (>_>) I also do that thing where you go back over a social situation or whatever and think about how it could have been done differently, over and over.... I just talk to myself all the time, and have an odd tendency to refer to myself with words like "we" and "us", or to call myself "you" when giving myself advice. And I couldn't even tell you the number of crazy life plans I came up with and didn't follow through... though many of them I did as well, and it's pretty great when you do.

I also don't have story characters really MOST of the time... it's just like you said, me and people I know, or people who I'm attracted to at least. But there are times when I really get into story mode and start developing some crazy magical fantasies obsessively for weeks or months every now and then, it's kind of on and off depending on what else is going on in my life. At those times I really get it, because the stories become my life, to the point that I usually can't even orgasm without thinking about them. Like I said though, it comes and goes.

But yeah, you're not alone lol.

I have found that most people are even more likely to think I am weird and crazy and silly when they find out I day dream than about lucid dreaming. My grandmother called my day dreams my "sillies" though I loved her dearly and the daydreams were precious to me but she did not understand; the few times I made the mistake to tell my husband about them usually he kind of made fun of my daydreams - except once I remember he really got into one theme with me and that was awesome for me. When I was a kid I would tell other kids at times and usually that was a mistake because kids can be cruel. Nowadays I almost never mention to anyone that I am a daydreamer. There are weeks when I have not day dreamed, but there are others where the daydreams have filled many a precious free moment whenever I could.

Quirky, I like it!

Duke: It is definitely nice to know there are others out there that do this. I do talk to myself when I'm alone, or rather whisper or mouth words to myself while I gesture and pace around the room. I'm actually doing so as I type this; it tends to take me way longer than it should to write things. I don't always have fictional characters in my head, they've come and gone throughout my life.

Joanna: I understand about the kids being cruel thing. I did have a friend in 4th grade that I told one of my daydreams to, she loved it and added her own character and we'd act it out at recess, that was really nice. Then I made the mistake of telling my best friend. The story had a lot of adult/violent themes to it, and she decided to bring it up to both our parents at the dinner table one night. That didn't go over well. I was horrified and haven't told anyone my stories ever since. I've never talked to my husband about this and only recently became aware that it has a name, but I suppose I should at some point.

Originally Posted by amiana

I'm actually doing so as I type this; it tends to take me way longer than it should to write things.

This, so much this.

Wow.. I thought this was normal behavior. This makes a very surprising amount of sense.

I show all of these symptoms but I don't do the stories very often. I kind of just put myself in my own little world and just explore. I only talk to myself when I get really into my daydreams, like when I dream up stories. I have a very obsessive personality in reality. All of my daydreams are very realistic. I haven't ever told anyone about my daydreams, just thinking it was normal behavior. I literally have every one of these tendencies. I have diagnosed ADD as well, never used any medicines for it. Huh, another thing that's weird about me. Great

I'll give greater examples when I get out of school.

Also, do you guys ever just get songs (multiple) stuck in your head like always? I always have music in my head. Whether it be in the background or roaring in my ears, its always playing.

Originally Posted by Brizzl

Also, do you guys ever just get songs (multiple) stuck in your head like always? I always have music in my head. Whether it be in the background or roaring in my ears, its always playing.

Yes, constantly. I actually get up and dance almost as much as I just pace. Some of my friends actually love seeing peoples' reactions when they find out about it lol. I don't attempt to hide it from anyone, I just openly bob my head or break into dance at almost any social gathering.

Yup, this is me... I can make whole movies in seconds in my mind an live through them... I have uber imagination and I can even daydream as I am typing this... I spend all day long in my own world.

My wife is extremely attached to the media (tv, phone, etc) and I am much in my own world... so it is good there. I work as a Psychic Medium, so that even aggravates the situation, as I am spending "more than up there that down here on Earth" as my wife said... but it is actually positive for me.

Alyzarin: I really wish I was better at visualization. It's so irritating sometimes when I try and lose track of it. But I know exactly what you mean about having polar opposites in your head and referring to yourself as "you" or "we", I do the same thing. I always thought of the two differing thoughts in my head as an advantage and the reason why I don't generally have "extreme" points of view. One side may have an extreme view then the other side will tell the first side it's an idiot and there's no logical basis for it, then back it up with facts and hypotheticals. Sometimes it can get kind of intense Also helps to work out problems with other people when you can see both sides of the argument regardless of which side you're actually on. One thing that kind of relates to the idea of going over social situations is I will get lost sometimes in thought going years back, saying what if (for example) I had stayed with my ex girlfriend, then going on a huge detailed trip through an alternate reality on how my life would have been different and where I would be today.

Amiana: When I write for myself I usually just throw it all out and then if needed I'll add more to it. I read my posts out loud though, it takes me forever.. One of the reasons I don't post "that much" is because sometimes it takes me an entire hour or more to write a post because I'll type it up then read it 3 times and change half of it, then preview it and reread it and change half of it again. Then post it and reread it and go back and edit it because I left something out or don't like my wording. I'm working on not doing that so much because it's really time consuming and usually there was nothing wrong with my original thoughts.

IInSSyNc, I wanted to thank you for this thread, this is a great discussion. It also makes me wonder how these traits tie in with our interest in dreams and ability or desire to LD.

Yes, great thread. It's eye opening to read about others who have this!

Meditation has been helping me tremendously with my maladaptive daydreaming. I'm slowly learning how to control my thoughts, allowing myself to indulge in my fantasy world when I choose and to shut it off when I need to focus on something else.

In tandem, daydreaming has provided me with an unconventional way to improve my meditation and lucid dreaming skills. I've created a character in my head who is a master yogi and lucid dreamer and she teaches me. I desperately want to meet her in a lucid dream, I think it will be an immensely transformative experience when I finally accomplish it.

The only symptom that seems to hit home for me is the one that states "-the ability to see issues from many perspectives (we can have intense dialogs in our own minds)". I very often have entire "conversations" with myself. Usually in these conversations I'll represent two or 3 sides of a controversial issue and then debate it out. I've never confused those voices for anyone's but my own and have known full well I had been talking to myself the whole time. This is what lead me to conclude that I was not insane. After many years of doing this, I had assumed everyone thought like this. I still do.
P.S. During these debates, I very often pace around my kitchen. Not sure that's important though.

I don't think I've ever had a day dream, I always figured it was just something that happened to cartoon characters. My dreams are usually stuck to the night time. I don't really consider myself to be very creative either, which is annoying because I've always wanted to do art as a hobby, but I just end up staring at the paper and giving up :/

Originally Posted by duke396

Alyzarin: I really wish I was better at visualization. It's so irritating sometimes when I try and lose track of it. But I know exactly what you mean about having polar opposites in your head and referring to yourself as "you" or "we", I do the same thing. I always thought of the two differing thoughts in my head as an advantage and the reason why I don't generally have "extreme" points of view. One side may have an extreme view then the other side will tell the first side it's an idiot and there's no logical basis for it, then back it up with facts and hypotheticals. Sometimes it can get kind of intense Also helps to work out problems with other people when you can see both sides of the argument regardless of which side you're actually on. One thing that kind of relates to the idea of going over social situations is I will get lost sometimes in thought going years back, saying what if (for example) I had stayed with my ex girlfriend, then going on a huge detailed trip through an alternate reality on how my life would have been different and where I would be today.

Yeah, you just described me like exactly too. Like perfectly. I used to tell people that my mind was like a warzone. Eventually though I managed to get over it and integrate a lot of those feelings... so now there's just a harmony lol. It's nice. The rest of the stuff I still deal with though. >.>

Originally Posted by ProudasaPeacock

I don't think I've ever had a day dream, I always figured it was just something that happened to cartoon characters. My dreams are usually stuck to the night time. I don't really consider myself to be very creative either, which is annoying because I've always wanted to do art as a hobby, but I just end up staring at the paper and giving up :/

My friend told me something like that once. Day dreams are definitely real, it's like a whole other world inside your head. I had been talking to my friend about the different ways that people think back in high school and I told him basically everything this thread is about, and he told me that he just thought in words. I can't imagine it. He eventually got a visual imagination though, he and I were smoking weed with another friends of ours and listening to techno and he was saying "It's like there's a movie in my mind!!" haha. Maybe you should try reading over visualization guides if you want to be more creative. Who knows what you could unlock if you developed your imagination?

Originally Posted by Alyzarin

My friend told me something like that once. Day dreams are definitely real, it's like a whole other world inside your head. I had been talking to my friend about the different ways that people think back in high school and I told him basically everything this thread is about, and he told me that he just thought in words. I can't imagine it. He eventually got a visual imagination though, he and I were smoking weed with another friends of ours and listening to techno and he was saying "It's like there's a movie in my mind!!" haha. Maybe you should try reading over visualization guides if you want to be more creative. Who knows what you could unlock if you developed your imagination?

My thoughts are usually just in words as well, if I try to imagine pictures they usually flicker a bit and I have to concentrate quite hard. That and my lack of creativity are kind of the main drivers towards getting a lucid dream for me. To run around in my imagination would be awesome, and it might help with my imagination in real life I'll definitely check out the visualisation guides. Thanks Alyzarin! (or is it Fantasizer?)

No problem, I hope they help you! And Alyzarin is fine. Lucid dreams should definitely help you with it, but it's a two-way street too. The better you get at navigating your imagination the easier it will be for you to recognize and control your dreams. It will really help you a lot!

Yes, flickering is a better way to describe my experience with visualization too. I think I'll try that same advice and work on that. Even if it doesn't help with LD directly, I've always wanted to have better visualization just so I could get more immersed in my head when desired and also for help with meditation and such. Just never really tried to work on it.

I think that it's crazy that some people can only think in words and not images. I would imagine my life would be rather bland without my imagination and visual memory. I experience the flickering a lot. Mostly because I don't stay on one thought for very long lol