I have heard from some, that they get a lucid the moment they stop trying.

This is my opinion about it.

1. Trying means practicing RCs, mantras, awareness, memory training, visualizing, writing in DJ, and anything else people do to set the intent. If we do all this, and we try too hard, meaning, we wish for it too hard, then it may not work well. Like when we get anxious or upset when it doesn't work. Then wrong emotions and mindset are projected.

So in this case, when we stop trying, we drop the anxiety and unhapiness. All there is left is the residue from practice. So if someone gets a LD when not trying, I think it's because of the residue of training is still there, but the anxiety is not.

2. Proper way of trying is to be practicing, but not really trying. Just knowing, that it will happen. Having confidence. Replacing wish with intent.

Wish is something not certain. Something we only hope for. Like "oh, I wish I was an astronaut".
Intent, is something that we know will happen. Something we know we are going to do. Like going to work/school in the morning. We don't wish for it, but we know it's going to happen.

So this intent and knowing shold be the mindset for lucid dreaming. Without anxiety, disappointment, stress... Just knowing, that we are doing everything right and we are going to have a LD, because we are lucid dreamers.

It's almost like "I don't care attitude". But not that we don't care if we have them, because we do, ofc. But we don't care, if we don't have them. If we just get an attmpt, we appreciate it as a learning experience.