Hi Imapdxpunk. Great story!
Right - down to business. Coincidences are a fascinating area in multiple ways. One of those ways is coincidence awareness manipulation or 'false responsibility'. This is a technique used in some cults and cultish groups, as well as many traditional 'spiritual' systems in many different ways. It has some interesting, positive versions - such as omen diviniation, where that's used to create a sense of connection and significance with the world and things around you; and it has some quite disturbing uses, mostly in manipulating and controlling people.
First of all, we are very selective in the information we notice about the world. And we're so good at doing that that we can take on board a set of ideas, such as Marxism or Fundamentalist Christianity, and then set in place conscious and unconscious percpetual filters which then control our awareness of the world around us, making our beliefs seem self evidently true and reflected in the world. A Marxist sees evidence of Marxist ideas everywhere. A Fundamentalist Christian likewise 'experiences' the truth of their beliefs all around them. This phenomena is so strong that it creates something which I'm sure you're aware of, as we all are - the person who doesn't just think you're wrong, they think you're stupid, mad, evil, etc. for not accepting what they say. That happens because to them, what they believe isn't just a belief, it's a self evident truth, right in front of them, all around them, and anyone would have to be mad or evilnot to see it/acknowledge it to!
'Coincidence sensitivity' is a related phenomenon. First off, coincidences are actually statistically necessary and predicted in any chaotic system. It couldn't be chaotice without them. Imagine throwing up a hundred coins and not being able to draw a straight line between three or four coins - that would be an unbelievable coincidence. Far from being evidence of external influence on our chaotic world, coincidences are a mathematically essential aspect of it. NO coincidences would, ironically, be far more of an indicator that we live in some kind of controlled or designed world subject to external controls.
What this is getting at is that coincidences happen all around us, all the time. But we can become much more sensitive to noticing them. Especially when people begin thinking about things - say, coincidences - they'll notice them more and more. But even when people just begin thinking more deeply anyway, about anything, we, as amazing cognitive beings, tend to 'bounce' off things we see, read, hear etc. For example, you see something on Star Trek and that connects with something you're pondering, and we see that as a deep coincidence, and apply significance to it, when in fact, it's part of how our minds work - sometimes called 'ambient relevance' - just bouncing ideas off whatever is around.
Sometimes that is manipulated. If someone joins a group which involves pondering their ideas, then just the fact that we are pondering statistically causes more incidents of 'ambient relevance'. I've seen myself unscrupulous people use this phenomenon to make the person it's happening to believe that it's not just a psychological phenomenon, but due to the 'power of the group's belief' - for example, a Marxist might say you are acheiving revolutionary consciousness, or spiritual cults might say you are becoming more aware of the truth, and the power of their teaching is such that it 'does mad things to your awareness'. And that'spart of a wider range of techniques used to make a recruit think that these ''spiritual'' guides have some kind of power over events in your life. And it does feelvery real when it happens to you like that.
And we can also do it to ourselves. We can make ourselves coincidence sensitive, and we can make ourselves think that it is due to something else, such as magic of some kind. I don't dismiss that - I just say that there are other ways of looking at it, such as the fact that coincidences, even amazing coincidences are happening all the time as statistical essentials in chaotic systems, but we're not always sensitive to them for various reasons.
Having said that, some coincidences are astonishing - and even some series of coincidences can be astonishing coincidences! So it comes down to what significance you ascribe to them. But significant coincidences, mathematically, HAVE to happen - and they have to happen to someone. And if that someone is you, it's the observer paradox - if it happens to you, it seems abillion to one against, even though it was actually a trillion to one that that WOULD happen - to someone.
With dreams, there's other dimensions in that we can 'deep read' them - that is, see significance which isn't necessarily there until we pair it up with something else that happens. Again, we can be very selective in how we do that, 'managing' coincidnece occurence quite neatly and effectively. And our dreams can also process a lot fo subconscious predictions about the world, like a computer- mnay of which weren't necessarily all that hard to predict, actually, given a computer as powerful as the human brain.
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