I just can't stay detached - Dis-Identifiying from the thinking mind

[Kuhnada29]

I try and focus on the present moment as much as I can now, especially when I'm going out. And I know I'm getting better at paying attention to the present moment. But it just seems like no matter how much I try and meditate, I constantly slip back into that egoic mind of living in the past or thinking about the future, or being involved in some mind-chatter ( almost like I'm talking to myself ). I think it's the worse at night when I try and go to sleep, which I can't because I'm constantly getting caught up in mind-chatter. Even when I try to meditate and I can maintain that inner stillness, it just doesn't last for so long, i end up right back at square one. The thoughts come back when i drop my guard. And I don't even notice when I do get reattached to the thoughts. It's just frustrating. Why is this so hard? Why is it so hard to stay in the present moment. I really do want my mind to be free. Maybe I should try and meditate more, or set a schedule for meditation, like everydat. I haven't been meditating as much as I used to, maybe that's why. To all you spiritual gurus here on dreamviews, how do you maintain your present moment awareness, and keep it.

[Dthoughts]

What does it mean to be in the present moment anyway? It's almost impossible not to think about future/past. Or things you need to do. Like for example if somebody needs some help i plan how i help her and i execute my plan. Or i set my alarm before i go to bed so i get up before/after REM . Or for whatever reason people might set alarm clocks. I'm aware of the misinformation i have in my mind and how i've been manipulated in the past by mass media and stuff like that. But yesterday i was so aware of that when i had an opinion of something and listened to my mind i actually had auditory memories of things i heared on TV or somewhere when i was younger and it was always related to the thing i was thinking about, so i guess having a free mind is being aware how ur mind can be manipulated and having a shield for that sort of stuff.

[Kuhnada29]

I believe having a free mind ( or being present ) is when you are the one controlling your mind, not your mind controlling you. There is a difference when your mind/attention is pulled constantly in different directions ( problems, worries, etc. ) without your consent ( or without your noticing for that matter ) and you keeping your mind in the present moment thinking of the past/future only when you want to. I feel like most people are a slave to their mind, a slave to their emotions. Their emotions control them when it's supposed to be the other way around. Those who can stay in the present moment have a serious advantage. If I've offended anybody, I apologize. You can delete this post if necessary.

[StonedApe]

If anyone was offended by your post then they can fuck off. Why is this so hard? Why is it so hard to stay in the present moment. I really do want my mind to be free. Maybe I should try and meditate more, or set a schedule for meditation, like everydat. I haven't been meditating as much as I used to, maybe that's why. To all you spiritual gurus here on dreamviews, how do you maintain your present moment awareness, and keep it. It is hard because the ego says that it is hard and makes spirituality into a game that it will win one day and then it will be so mighty and powerful and free, not free now, but when i figure it out. Do you procrasinate? This is my main problem, and chickening out around girls I really like and somehow not around girls I kinda sorta might do it with if I was drunk. It is only hard because some part of you still does not want to stay here now, in non-dualistic, non-preferential awareness. Meditating everyday is absolutely essential if you want to develop a smadhi or really stay awake, at least it seems that way to me. I haven't really done that yet, but by meditating daily I've made significant progress, but calling it that feels wrong. It's more like I've undone past violent tendencies and am more free to just live. EDIT: but my main point is don't try to de-tach, meet each thought completely then return to what you are focusing on now. Detaching creates conflit and aversion and basically is taking bad karma and making more with it.

[nina]

Have you seen The Peaceful Warrior? If not, you MUST.

[StonedApe]

Have you seenread The Peaceful Warrior? If not, you MUST. Fixed. The book is better and more instructional.

[Kuhnada29]

Aquanina, I actually just seen Peaceful Warrior last night. It was amazing, especially how the coach at the end looked like he had a tear in his eye. Powerful movie. Stonedape, your right. It is the ego, it's a sneaky bastard too. But I guess it takes practice and dedication to stay in the moment. So i'll keep at it.

[LucidFlanders]

Just curious but what is so special about being free of the ego?

[DrunkenArse]

I believe having a free mind ( or being present ) is when you are the one controlling your mind, not your mind controlling you. False dichotomy. You are indistinguishable from your mind. The perception of "you" being distinct from anything is an illusion. Everything that you perceive is a part of your mind.

[nina]

Fixed. The book is better and more instructional. Meh, I didn't get much from the book actually. I couldn't even finish it.

[stormcrow]

Sometimes when I have trouble focusing while meditating I look up(with eyes closed) and focus on on the middle of my forehead. This creates a strange almost pleasurable straining feeling and always helps me clear my mind again. @Stonedape- Can you recommend any books or thinkers that talk about some of the stuff you were talking about?

[Alric]

What you want, is to set aside some time to think about all the stuff that pops into your mind. Perhaps even doing it right before you meditate. You need time to just sit quietly and think about all the issues that are in your life. If you try to ignore all of it, none of the issues will ever get resolved, and you will just make it get worse. So you really do need time to think on issues.

[stormcrow]

What you want, is to set aside some time to think about all the stuff that pops into your mind. Perhaps even doing it right before you meditate. You need time to just sit quietly and think about all the issues that are in your life. If you try to ignore all of it, none of the issues will ever get resolved, and you will just make it get worse. So you really do need time to think on issues. Actually this is a great method. Me and my ex used to do this before we tripped together and it always turned into a fun confess your sins game.

[saltyseedog]

focus on the feeling in your heart. If your having hard time with that. Try focusing on your heart beat, the feeling of your heart beat. Now only focus on the feeling you get from that area.

[saltyseedog]

Do you procrasinate? This is my main problem, and chickening out around girls I really like and somehow not around girls I kinda sorta might do it with if I was drunk. You procrasinate because you don't feel like doing it. and your nervous around girls because your soul fears they will not like you.

[StonedApe]

Just curious but what is so special about being free of the ego? Being free of the ego is a misleading way to put it. What it actually is is understanding the ego and not letting it pull you out of the moment, not letting your concept of who you are cover up who you really are. The ego as it is talked about here is not the ego as it is talked about in psychology either. It's more of a collection of thoughts of what should be, what you should be. What you are as well, and what you were. You get in mind this thought of what you should be, this violates what is, in a sense it is an act of violence against yourself and is the root of all suffering. Ego is an assumption and assumptions can hide reality.

[StonedApe]

@Stonedape- Can you recommend any books or thinkers that talk about some of the stuff you were talking about? J Krishnamurti

[nina]

Have you tried dissociatives?

[Xaqaria]

Are you attached to being detached?