tell me the funniest jokes you've ever heard

**thisismylogin** · 04-07-2008 12:29 AM

i agree...
all it did was fuck shit up! and OMG we had it all! BUT that wasn't enough... it was such a joke!

**DayDreamBeliever13** · 04-07-2008 12:39 AM

Knock Knock
..
Who's there??
..
Kill
..
Kill who??
..
Kill you!!!!!

^^credits to anjelica c.

**Pyrofan1** · 04-07-2008 02:13 AM

A polar bear and a seal were taking a bath together and the polar bear asks the seal for some soap and the seal says "No Soap, radio!"

**LimoZeen!** · 04-07-2008 02:31 AM

Originally Posted by Pyrofan1

A polar bear and a seal were taking a bath together and the polar bear asks the seal for some soap and the seal says "No Soap, radio!"

I don't get it...?

**kingofclutch** · 04-07-2008 02:34 AM

Originally Posted by Pyrofan1

A polar bear and a seal were taking a bath together and the polar bear asks the seal for some soap and the seal says "No Soap, radio!"

Originally Posted by LimoZeen!

I don't get it...?

Me neither.

**Lord Toaster** · 04-07-2008 02:36 AM

Originally Posted by LimoZeen!

I don't get it...?

Originally Posted by kingofclutch

Me neither.

Polar bears don't take baths!!

**kingofclutch** · 04-07-2008 02:39 AM

Originally Posted by LimoZeen!

I don't get it...?

Originally Posted by kingofclutch

Me neither.

Originally Posted by Lord Toaster

Polar bears don't take baths!!

What? I still don't get it.

**Dreamaholic** · 04-07-2008 04:05 AM

Two men walk into a bar.

The third one ducks. hahahahahahahahahaha I know its bad but funny.

**dragonoverlord** · 04-07-2008 05:29 AM

CHuck Norris went to the virgin islands now they are called just the Islands.

Like dreamaholic said i know its bad aswell but its funny!!!

**LimoZeen!** · 04-07-2008 05:34 AM

Originally Posted by dragonoverlord

CHuck Norris went to the virgin islands now they are called just the Islands.

Like dreamaholic said i know its bad aswell but its funny!!!

Lol Chuck Norris jokes are the best

Little miss Muppet sat on her tuppet
Eating her curds and whey
...Until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked her into a GLACIER!

**awoke** · 04-07-2008 07:19 PM

...the seal was trying to kill the polar bear...by tossing him a radio while he's in the bath.

**MrBeelzy** · 04-07-2008 07:46 PM

Originally Posted by awoke

...the seal was trying to kill the polar bear...by tossing him a radio while he's in the bath.

Some people's children.

**thisismylogin** · 04-07-2008 08:10 PM

Originally Posted by Dreamaholic

Two men walk into a bar.

The third one ducks. hahahahahahahahahaha I know its bad but funny.

PS... thats is actually like my favorite joke ever... i didn't want to post in on here... on account of how stupid it is so i am glad some one did!

**franki** · 04-10-2008 02:25 AM

a pirate and a sailor are chatting in a bar, swapping stories. the sailor asks the pirate about his wooden leg.
"arr" says the pirate, "i fell overboard in high seas, me crew pulled me aboard but not before a shark bit me leg clean off at the knee".
"gosh" says the sailor, "how did you get your hook?"
"sea battle with the merchant navy" replies the pirate, "i cut ten of 'em down meself before one of 'em took me hand off with his sword"
"impressive" says the sailor. "so how come you've got the eyepatch?"
"i was looking up at the rigging" says the pirate "when a seagull craps in me eye"
"how come you lost your eye to that?" asks the sailor
"arr, 'twas me first day with the hook"

**Universal Mind** · 04-10-2008 03:38 AM

Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?

He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

**Venomblood** · 04-10-2008 05:05 AM

Originally Posted by Universal Mind

Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac?

He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a dog.

Ah good one!

I wish I knew some good jokes other that were actually worthwhile and not so easily altered.

**LimoZeen!** · 04-10-2008 05:09 AM

Did you hear about the paranoid dyslexic? He always thought he was following someone.

**Pyrofan1** · 04-11-2008 12:10 AM

Why do Halloween and Christmas fall on the same day?
Because 31 oct=25 dec

**LimoZeen!** · 04-11-2008 01:05 AM

Lol who figured that one out?

**dragonoverlord** · 04-11-2008 04:14 AM

Originally Posted by Pyrofan1

Why do Halloween and Christmas fall on the same day?
Because 31 oct=25 dec

I don't get it

**theyearthreethousand** · 04-11-2008 04:16 AM

Originally Posted by Omnius Deus

How do you make a two year old cry twice?

By wiping your bloody penis on his teddy bear.

WTF!?

**The Tao** · 04-11-2008 04:28 AM

^ Theres alot of them types of jokes that are for Shock Value, such as this one!

Whats the best part about having sex with twenty two year olds?

Theres twenty of them.