 Originally Posted by apurtell
Blackbirdrising: That sounds like a very positive experience for you. Since it was 12 years ago, did things pan out the way that she said it would? It would be good to hear you're in that better place now 
YES I got out of that marriage in 2011! (After 17 years, not unscathed but alive and well). I've since regained a lot of my self confidence back, lost some weight, but most importantly, recovered my health. I feel so strong now, now that I'm able to take care of myself - my health problems were brushed under the rug for almost two decades. And I'm very happy - I was reunited in 2011 with my high school best friend/lover Adam after two decades of not being able to be in contact with each other, due to my ex-husband being a control freak of the worst order - Adam is someone no one ever expected for me to fall in love with, because he was the "bad boy" of the neighborhood 25 years ago, when we were growing up. And yet my mother always saw the good in him, she trusted him with me when she didn't even trust the sweetest neighborhood boy - she knew his heart even back then, and saw him with non-judgmental eyes. I remember when I told my mother that Adam and me had found each other again, two years ago, she got on her knees and thanked God, and cried because she knew I would be safe. He grew up to be the truest, bravest man I've ever known, and he treats me like a queen, he's very hard working, honest, reliable, and would give the shirt off of his back to help anyone he loves. We take good care of each other, and we cherish every day, because our days are limited. We feel the autumn chill of aging....
I'm a Country/Blues/Rock/Folk singer/songwriter now, half of a duet, with Adam on guitar/harmonica/banjo/lead tenor vocals - a far stretch from being forced to be the quiet Muslim wife who had to wear no jewelry, long conservative clothing, no open toed shoes, walk a step behind with my eyes cast down, and remain silent when we went out or when people came over. No more shame, no more bruises, thank God - and I do every waking moment. I had to relearn how to be independent, smile, bust out laughing, walk proudly, and not be afraid of being noticed. Adam is the love of my whole life.... we just had to be apart, for a very long time - 20 years.
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