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    1. #1
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      What is happiness?

      ive been depressed recently, which usually gets me thinking about stupid crap nobody cares about, and one such topic that crossed my mind was 'what exactly is happiness?'

      is it a state in which you find yourself in, uncontrollable by yourself, much like 'its daytime right now' or 'im happy right now'

      is it like a sideffect (or possibly just an effect) of an action...like you are doing something that makes you happy, therefore you are happy...like flipping a lightswitch, which then in turn makes the lights go on...but then what if the wiring in the wall is broken, and flipping the lightswitch deosnt make the light go on one day?

      is it a state of mind? i choose to be happy, therefore i am happy...much like 'i choose to stand up' and then you find yourself standing up...

      ...and then there is the question of do we have the right to be happy? how far are we allowed to go to attain this? for example, if i decide that happiness is a sideffect (as many do), and my lightswitch is drinking, is that ok? what of my job, my kids, my school, my parents? and then if you say that drinking is not a good lightswitch to use, what is? anything can be detrimental...if i play videogames too much, my school or job or lovelife could suffer, or if i play a sport, like football, is it not possible to play it too much and neglect other things? so then how far are we allowed to pursue a lightswitch...how far are we allowed to go to be happy? or should we always put others happiness before ourselves? but if we do this, and so deos everyone else, would anyone be happy?



      ...i have my own answers, however i want to hear what you guys have to say first

    2. #2
      Member A Lost Soul's Avatar
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      The thing about drinking is this: it may make you happy, but it's only a temporary sort of happy. No matter how much you drink, you will never really be happy. Sure it flicks that switch, but again, only for a few moments. Besides, there's a good chance you can wake up next to some hairy dirtbag with no memory of what happened the night before.

      Happiness is aloof. I don't know that you can control it, per se. I wish I could tell you what it is, but it's like love. You can't explain it, and a lot of people believe that it doesn't really exist. I've been depressed for pretty much my whole life. The doctors say that somthing is chemically fucked-up in my head and my body just isn't working right. So I've been on medication for a while now. While I admit, it has helped considerably, I wonder if I'll have to take it for the rest of my life to be 'happy', or even 'normal'. I think there are different levels of happiness. When I listen to a cool song, I'm happy. When I hug my dog, or play with my cat, I'm happy. But when I lay beside someone I love deeply, it's a different sort of happiness. More profound, more inward and silent. It's the epitome of contentment... like I could stay that way forever and not even blink an eye.

      I suppose some people feel that all the time, that they're content with the world and their lives. Other people don't. You pose a hard question for these times because we have to take into consideration our means of survival. We need money to survive. Therefore, do we need money to be happy? Is the richest man on earth also the happiest? Is the man who has found the love of his life and children the happiest? Or is a child the happiest, too innocent to know the harsh realities of this world?

      You really pose a hard question. It's a thinker.

      “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”
      - Kurt Cobain (1967 – 1994)

    3. #3
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      bleh, i always think about difficult things when im depressed ...but what i mean is this, if being with that certain special person makes you happy, why not ignore everything else in your life and simply be with them...what i mean is, how do you go about balancing responsibility with the things that make you happy? deos responsibility really matter at all, if you're happy? etc.

    4. #4
      moderator emeritus jacobo's Avatar
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      happiness is in a moment. no happiness can last, all you can do is try to attain as many as these happy moments as possible and just live down all the crappy ones. -- find someone to share some happy moments with. find something, maybe an object or a job that gives you a sense of accomplishment. but nothing lasts forever, it just lasts as long as your interested in it.
      clear eyes. strong hands.

    5. #5
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      do you really believe that adidas? im sorry you feel that way

    6. #6
      無駄だ~! GestaltAlteration's Avatar
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      listen.... To be technical happiness is a single chimical in which activates whenever you feel the need to be happy (its simply a persons desire or Mind set that makes this chimical activate at certain things.)

      Drugs like extacy can Distroy the gland that produces these chimicals and renders you... Unhappy..

      Oh and I've been in the depression scene before... Exercise regularly eat right get up and active more are a few thigns that will get you better in no time.

    7. #7
      moderator emeritus jacobo's Avatar
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      Originally posted by WerBurN
      do you really believe that adidas? im sorry you feel that way
      yip, and im not sorry. i find a lot of happiness in the world.
      clear eyes. strong hands.

    8. #8
      Member phantasy's Avatar
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      I think happiness is what you make it, although happines can be found in common things such as the love of others, accomplishment, and so on.

      If you let little things get to you, you won't be happy. So only worry about the things that matter. Certain things make certain people happy. Everything depends on everything else.

      Don't worry about things that are unanswerable and you could never know. Such as your question, "What is happiness?"
      You could make yourself sick with some answers. As long as you are happy and what you do is in line with your beliefs, just be happy. As the song, goes, "Don't worry, be happy."

      BTW, what's wrong with saying happiness doesn't last forever? It doesn't, you have to constantly find diffferent things to make you content. But I don't think you should only think of happiness, or as I call it, the 'fun always syndrome'. Not everything brings happiness and you shouldn't try to make it so. Life is life, life is not happiness. There will be ups and downs, and you shouldn't think that you don't deserve either one of them.
      My new friend: Lucy D. Tea

    9. #9
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      but nobody has really said how much is too much...by the way, on a side note i believe that trying to be happy 100% of the time, even if you are successful, is bad, as the only reason that being happy feels good, is because you are sad sometimes...this is the main reason i say that i like to get depressed every now and again...makes you appreciate it when you arent...so again the real question isnt so much 'what is happiness' as we could get a million different definitions, since it really is whatever you make it out to be, but rather, do we have the right to pursue our own happiness, and if so, to what degree is this right allowed to be taken? its one thing to be happy, its another to be happy at your own, or worse yet, anothers expense...how far are we allowed to go to be happy in the now, and on the flip side, how far should we invest in future happiness? ie going to college could (for some) make the rest of your life generally better/more happy, since you will have more money (which for some equates some degree of happiness)...but perhaps you are miserable for the 5 years you go to college? well there are some people that spend their whole lives making their future better, without ever 'stopping to smell the roses' ....so, how to we balance the happiness in the now with the happiness in the future, and to what expenses are we allowed to pursue this happiness, either in the now or the future?

    10. #10
      Member icedawg's Avatar
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      Originally posted by adidas
      but nothing lasts forever
      "nothing lasts forever"

      that statement itself is a contradiction, since it implies that there is some sort of force that forever exists preventing things from forever existing. or, if you'd rather, that there is a law that indefinitely exists stating that nothing can exist forever. regardless, if either of those can exist forever, then clearly it is proven that something can exist forever. this proves that statement cannot be logically proven true, thus, it is flawed and inaccurate. this simply means it is, indeed, possible for things to exist forever. holy crap, I'M AWESOME!


      good day.

      p.s. pessimistic people suck.
      Each new day is a chance to turn it all around.

    11. #11
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      roflmao...tho icedawg, if you really want to get philosophical or technical like that, nothing can be proven to be true or exist with the exception of oneself as a thinking entity...sooo, ermm ya

    12. #12
      Member icedawg's Avatar
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      Originally posted by WerBurN
      roflmao...tho icedawg, if you really want to get philosophical or technical like that, nothing can be proven to be true or exist with the exception of oneself as a thinking entity...sooo, ermm ya
      logic is neither technical nor philosophical; logic is a boundary that encompasses all things (except, of course, for illogical things).

      p.s. (just to keep things on topic) happiness is...umm... well, it's...you know. hrm. i know! happiness is a field of sunflowers stretching on as far as the eye can see. there, i think that about accurately sums that up.
      Each new day is a chance to turn it all around.

    13. #13
      Guardian Serinanth's Avatar
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      Freedom.

      The wind in my hair,
      The ocean before my eyes,
      The grass under my feet
      The trickle of a river unseen to the eye, cascading underground, to the ocean below.
      The feel of my sword as I slice the air, and the sound that accompanies it.

      Drinking beers and hanging out with those that you would give up your life to keep safe, but if it ever came to that... fighting and staying for them. True Friends, and Family.

      Alone cold and soaked, no idea where I am, scaling a cliff covered in brambles just because I want to see whats on the other side.

      The stinging cold air of a winter morning filling my lungs, the mists of the lake still heavy, floating in my kayak bobbing on the quiet water, listening to the tinkle like glass of the iceflows around me as the little swells move them about.

      Waking up, your eyes still closed, feeling the familiar warmth beside you and hearing the slow and steady breathing, of peaceful sleep.

      Making some one else happy

      Showing someone a picture, their breath is taken away and the look of awe is on their face. Just as it was mine as I saw the place with my own eyes.

      Flight, under the clouds and through them, the cold thin air biting at your skin as you ascend through a cloud, water rolling off your wings as the cloud condenses around your body heat. Emerging into the pure light of the sun the clouds below you, the radiance of the light filling your being with a warmth and energy you have no words for, the feeling of the air pulling you upwards above your wings and the quiet rush of it over your ears. Bound by nothing observed by none but yourself.
      "A knight is sworn to valor.
      His heart knows only virtue.
      His blade defends the helpless.
      His might upholds the weak.
      His word speaks only truth.
      His wrath undoes the wicked."

      Impossible is only that which has yet to be imagined

    14. #14
      He will have his revenge Aphius's Avatar
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      Those things are subjective though Serinanth.

      To you that is what happiness may be, but to others Freedom and such might not be the key. What if an individual fears freedom. What if to be told what to do and not have to make choices for oneself make them feel safe, comfortable and happy? Others are afraid of flight and heights. Staying with their feet firmly on the ground may be what makes them happy.

      One cannot define happiness as a certain thing because everyone has different things that makes them happy.

      I'm not saying any of it is bad. it all sounds quite good actually, but what defines happiness for one person may not for another.
      These are the tears that I dream about...

    15. #15
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      but still nobody has tried to answer the true question i am posing...read above

    16. #16
      He will have his revenge Aphius's Avatar
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      The reason i haven't answered it is really because there is no real answer. You were asking how far we should be allowed to pursue our happiness, but no one can really tell you that. I guess you just have to rely on your better judgement to let you know when enough is enough. Some people would pursue someone who made them happy to the ends of the earth others think thats too extreme, though just an example its kind of relevant.

      I guess the only answer fitting to what you want is another question

      "How far are you willing to go and how much is enough?"

      We cant tell you how far you should go to be happy, its something you probably need to discover on your own.
      These are the tears that I dream about...

    17. #17
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      but i mean, what if i choose that, i want to go to any expense to make myself happy...well what if in doing so i am hurting others? emotionally or physically for whatever reason..is that right? is that ok? ...again i have my own answers, i just like to hear what others have to say...another perception is always welcome

    18. #18
      Guardian Serinanth's Avatar
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      I did not say it was happiness for you.. of course its subjective who else would I be answering for..... I figured that was kind of assumed that I would be answering for myself, happiness is an inward feeling I dont know what makes you happy I am not you..

      It is a state of mind, I cannot choose what makes me happy, but I can choose to do things that do make me happy. It seems to be the byproduct of doing something that elicits a certain response within yourself.

      Like what I said earlier, the experience of going out in my kayak makes me happy. As does the experience (that does not exist physically in this world) Flying through the clouds in my dragon form.

      When am I depressed? or un happy? when I am bored and not doing anything when am I happy? when I am exploring the world, or making other people happy or keeping them safe...

      You should not have to go to extrodinary lengths to make yourself happy and if you are hurting others in the process no it is not all right, its fucked up because how would you like for me to come along and do something to you that hurts you but makes me happy? You would feel like crap and that would make you NOT happy.

      I dont want to get into a whats right discussion but I firmly beleive this. And It will come around and bite you in your ass one day. Going to lengths to be happy is ok, if you need to do it but like I said its not that hard a thing to do, you just need to go find what it is that makes you happy and if doing something that hurts others honestly makes you happy then I dont know... you are very different than myself and I do not understand you.

      (*mutters* right now I am not happy as you can see =/ dont mind me I hope I didnt sound too much like an asshole)
      "A knight is sworn to valor.
      His heart knows only virtue.
      His blade defends the helpless.
      His might upholds the weak.
      His word speaks only truth.
      His wrath undoes the wicked."

      Impossible is only that which has yet to be imagined

    19. #19
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      lol...do remember i never said that this sort of destructive behaviour makes me happy...it was only a question lol...


      tho i noticed one day...why is it that other people are willing to go to great lengths to make someone's future happy, but it isnt as important to make their now happy...ie a poor family scrapes and scrounges, and in turn suffers to some extent, so their child can afford to go to college...however that family would never think about buying that same child a computer game that cost a fraction of the cost, even if said computer game would keep him happy and preoccupied until he left the house...i know this is a poor example but i think you can see what i mean...why is it everyone is always soo concerned with making their future happy? why not be happy now? what is wrong with today? 'tomarrow will be better' ...howsabout today becomes better? eh? ...oh sry...started to rant there

    20. #20
      Guardian Serinanth's Avatar
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      Oh no werburN, i didnt mean you personally! sorry bout that..
      You said to what lengths would one go and if it was bad for others would it be right and stuff... I guess I feel strongly about it thats all.


      Hmmm good question about the future...

      Being that now only exists and the future is just hope and dream.

      A parent wants the best of their child... wants them to succeed, to surpas even them. If they beleive that saving up so a child can go to college will make that child sucessfull and able to earn more money sucess and money are supposed to make you happy...

      And THAT is what is so very wrong with our society...

      Money and sucess in the business world more often than not does NOT make you happy, the Uppercrust has the highest suicide rate of any financial demographic and the poor have the lowest..

      Family needs to focus on now as well.. it should be the MAIN focus! if the parents are only focusing on the future than they are missing out on their lifes! we do not exist in the future!
      "A knight is sworn to valor.
      His heart knows only virtue.
      His blade defends the helpless.
      His might upholds the weak.
      His word speaks only truth.
      His wrath undoes the wicked."

      Impossible is only that which has yet to be imagined

    21. #21
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      ...i feely strong about this now and later (hehe) business...see my parents always looked at the future...it was always 'you need to do this so you'll grow up and be happy' or 'work now, payoff later' ...they too worked and worked and worked, always looking at a brighter future...i live verymuch in the now...if i die tomarrow, what would all that planning for the future have gotten for me? however, you mustn ignore the future either...my personal belief is that, i will strive for the now, so long as it isnt detrimental to my future, however, i will also strive for the future, so long as it isnt detrimental to the now...see? people forget that second part...tho i have known people who live by the second part, and have forgotten the first part...it is these two rules in conjunction, that are my guidelines...as for how far i am allowed to go to make myself happy...these are only rules for the self...obviously i do not believe you should hurt others to make yourself happy, however i will not go out of my way to hurt myself to make another happy...this may sound selfish, but stop and think...when you make someone you love happy, deos that not, in turn, make you happy? in this way, in accordance with that rule, i would still help those i love to become happy, and to a lesser extent even strangers, as that too makes us happy, to a lesser extent...you see? ...mmmmm...ya

    22. #22
      He will have his revenge Aphius's Avatar
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      Originally posted by Serinanth
      I did not say it was happiness for you..
      I didn't think you meant my happiness, i really dont think my happiness has anything to do with this. We were talking about WerBurN's happiness and the outlook thereof, i would not be so selfish as to turn this conversation to my own.

      I just said that as it read more like a things that could make people happy thing to me. I just made a mistake, i gave my opinion on what i believed i read, but my previous statement still stands. They are your beliefs yes, and i respect that. I just commented on how others may have different perspectives on the matter.



      Anyway, I agree totally that everyone puts too much thought into the future and neglects the present. It really isn't any fun to work like a dog now so that later you can have some money and regret not doing some things later on. As you said WerBurN "What if i died tomorrow?" nobody considers that in the great scheme of things.

      You could work your ass off to get into university and die in a tragic train crash somewhere in between. Now how much fun would that be!? Not very much. I can tell you that.
      These are the tears that I dream about...

    23. #23
      Member A Lost Soul's Avatar
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      Interesting. I think I have to change my response a bit.

      If happiness is anything like love, I no longer believe in it. Thus, that would make my world a very, very dark place and there should be no reason why I am alive right now, writing this to all of you. I have tried to end my miserable life many times. But I'm still fucking here, and I don't know why. Just when I think I've discovered some speck of happiness that could be for me, the happiness bites me in the ass and says, 'Ha, fooled you! I'm not for you after all.' Serinanth has a point, your happiness should not come at the expense of another's. But that's the story of my fucking life. Everything in my life that makes me happy, even in the least, comes with such a high price that I either be the asshole and pay it, or live the rest of this shithole life unhappy. And therein lies a whole other problem. You only ever have yourself. I don't care how many friends you have, or how close your family is, they will NEVER BE THERE FOR YOU IN THE END! You are alone, a singular soul in this cosmic fuckup of a universe. That in mind, do you pay the high price and attain happiness? Would you truly be happy having paid that price?

      My eyes are opening now. Put into perspective with the whole of my life, happiness does not exist. Love does not exists. Those are the truths that have been proven to me time and time again in this life, yet still I bang my head against that brick wall trying to attain both of them. I run on emotion, not logic, which is a very chaotic place to be and a lot of people don't understand my inner workings because of it. Frankly, I hate it, and i would giveup all my emotion for logic. But that's a whole other bag of chips. Someone once referred to me as 'a fiery turbulent inner emotional landscape.' I try to see the balance of existence: the light and dark, the eternal opposing forces that make up the All. Speaking of happiness and staying on subject, I am slowly beginning to lean toward the darkness again, because at least there I had something solid that I could grasp--power and control over a life that I didn't ask for yet remain stuck in until the gods see fit to take me from this body. And that is as close to happiness as some people will ever come.

      Metaphorically speaking (for those of you who've read my riddle), I am giving up on that goddamn mystic apple forever. Let the other apples all fall to me as they should, for with my power I can shake them from their trees. This is my life, goddamn it, and I resolve to be happy with what I can get.

      Woo. Little darkly poetic tonight, aren't I?

      “Wanting to be someone else is a waste of the person you are.”
      - Kurt Cobain (1967 – 1994)

    24. #24
      He will have his revenge Aphius's Avatar
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      Happiness and Love do not exist in the conventional sense. They are words. Something simple to mask that which has a deeper more profound meaning, you may not know it but someone out there will always care for you. It sounds like you have been through a lot of rough shit in your life. I respect you for being the kind caring person you are today. Dont give up your search for that talking apple! We could search for it together! With the help of true friends I'll give you a boost. and we WONT drop you. You are a friend to me and everyone on this board!

      Yes, in the end we might very well be alone when it comes down to it. I suppose what it could come down to is, Do you have the courage to face it alone? We all have to face this choice at some point, but do you know what? I'll keep fighting and i know i can take some comfort in the fact that i have somebody who cares for me on this board and otherwise that may not be able to be beside me for whatever reason but i know that the my true friends are there egging me on in spirit.

      Well, I know it seems hopeless sometimes but just remember Aphius cares for you and he sends you his love and strength. So no matter how dark the night becomes or how hopeless things may seem, the sun will always rise. Tomorrow is another day. You just have to wait out the night and good things will come to you.

      Be happy and remember i care for you and i know others give you their undying support too.
      These are the tears that I dream about...

    25. #25
      Member WerBurN's Avatar
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      yeesh...thats a very dark outlook LS...your life perspective is very different from mine...love not exist? i can see how you could see that, but happiness? how can happiness not exist? or rather you do not believe in it...but isnt that the same? hmm...you said that no matter how close your family or friends are, that they wont be there for you in the end...well perhaps it isnt a matter of closeness, but rather a matter of loyalty or character of your family/friends...i have three people that i can turn to, and have on many occasions, regardless of my circumstance or what it is that i need...maybe you simply havent met the right people...dreaming makes you happy, deos it not? that comes at no price...thats where i usually go when i cant find happiness in anything else...other than this (which deosnt really help), im not sure what to say...sorry i cant really offer better advice or help for you LS... ...im sorry that happiness deos not exist in your world...in my world, happiness is a decision, i choose to be happy, thinking about happy things, doing happy things...sometimes my world becomes overwhelmed by sad things or stress...but there are always places i can go, things i can do, that make me forget the sadness, not think about the stress...this forum is one of those places for me...or I can put my sadness into a song or a drawing, or I can relieve my stress in a videogame...for somewhere around 5 or 6 years, i had nothing to be happy about, nobody to be happy with, nowhere to be happy in, but i remained happy nonetheless...looking back, i honestly dont know how i was able to stay so happy, and i know that if i wasnt so happy about apparently nothing, i would not be alive right now...really the only answer i have as to why i was happy, is that i decided i was going to be happy, and nothing was going to stop me from doing so, and so i was happy...to this day, i choose to be happy, and it is very rare that i am even slightly saddened or disheartened...i'll usually get depressed for a few hours, before i remind myself that im happy...


      oh and Aphius, this thread wasnt about my happiness, just happiness in general

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