Thread: Top Five Things Every Extrovert Should Know About Introverts.

Originally Posted by Hercuflea

gah

too much effort

i'll stick to lucid dream girls lol

Man, I would love to know what happens if you get a band going. A lot of good results from doing that. Just don't end up with too much money and free time and turn into a drug addict. Other than that, it's plus all the way.

problem is i dont know anyone who i can start a band with, dont have too many friends

Originally Posted by Hercuflea

problem is i dont know anyone who i can start a band with, dont have too many friends

You could ask around just a little bit and find out who plays guitar and who plays drums. You could also put something in the classified ads in the newspaper about what you are trying to do and look for other people's classified ads about looking for people to start a band.

Originally Posted by Hercuflea

can anyone else help

Dude, you should be thankful that UM is sharing these kinds of views with you. I realize the advice isn't "comforting" because it feels so different from the advice you've probably always gotten from your male friends who aren't getting any, and from all your female friends... "you're fine as you are, just be yourself, blah blah"...

Don't just be yourself. Find out how to be your best possible self and strive for it. The WORST advice you can possibly follow is, "if you wait long enough, you'll meet the right one"... Um... no you won't! Well, that's not true. You very well might. But you know what? Because of all the time you've wasted waiting, you won't have the knowledge and experience to keep her, and you'll just be even more miserable.

Bottom line is (and this is true for all your endeavors in life), if something you've been doing isn't working, then do it differently, or it will continue not working. Otherwise, you're just rehearsing failure, which isn't very useful.

Back to the awkward silences: If you're very self-aware and uncomfortable with yourself, she will know it, because it shows through your body language. She probably wouldn't be able to point out the specifics; she'll just feel that "vibe". So being secure in that situation is not about pretending to be secure. It's about really feeling secure. A big part of that seems to be just realizing that there is nothing wrong with silences. Pay attention the next time you're hanging out with a friend you're comfortable with, and take note of how many silences go by without you even thinking about it. So why must it be different when you're with a girl you like? I'll tell you why it feels different: Because you feel like a lot is at stake. Let go of this idea of "outcome" and there being something at stake. Instead, just have fun, because then, so will she, and she'll realize what a cool guy you are.

hmm somehow i am both although I'd say more introverted.

Basically in school I'd say I'm rather extrovert. I'm always talking, sometimes a bit noisy, everyone knows me, tons of hi's in the corridor etc. But by the end of the week i guess i just want some peace and quiet or something. I mean ok if some friends are going to the movies or something then yeah I'll go but I'm quite content just relaxing at home( although my best friend lives with me so I'm never alone technically i suppose). Also in some ways i don't like the party atmosphere. I like it when I'm with 5 or 6 people i know very well, we'll have a great time. However if it's some huge party with like 50+ people i really don't like it, i think sometimes i feel a bit claustrophobic( fear of crowds maybe, although i don't mind public speaking.)and it feels rather impersonal to me, people are just getting pissed. I'm not sure what i am going to do when i go to University in two years( taking a year out), since it seems you have to go out every day and get so hammered you don't remember the night before and i really don't like that. lol don't know what I'll do.

Another good, related article. (Pretty funny, too. )

This article is dead on. I'm more introverted. And I LOVE my own personal space. I also LOVE to be social. I jsut like to keep things separate. This is why I loathe having an LTR. I can't Stand it when a girl i go out with is always thinking i don't like them just because i don't phone or talk to them on MSN everyday.

Also, I hate small talk. I automatically assume when people make small talk with me: that they are just being polite and are not really interested in what I have to say.

I've heard of the terms extroverted and introverted before but I never really sought to find a definition for them. I am surprised how much of an introvert I am. It pretty much describes me perfectly.

Nice article, has some good points.

It's hard to believe the numbers in this article: 70-75% of people are extroverts? I'm thinking we're ignoring the middle of the bell curve here. We need another term for the middle: mesoverts? omniverts? ambiverts?

I would class most of my friends as 'social introverts,' as in they enjoy having and attending parties, going out to bars, restaurants and shows, but mostly skip the small talk, and spend more of their time in solitary activities. It might have to do with most of my friends being academically inclined: masters students in particular require strong solitary concentration, but often 'play hard' whenever they can.

I'm more introvert than most of my friends, yet I've staked my livelihood on being social, working sales and hospitality. It helps that I'm genuinely interested in the weather, and in varieties of human experience, so "Nice day isn't it?" and "How's it going?" aren't entirely idle inquiries

The description of the article fits me in many aspects, except that I LOVE socialising and parties and going out, even without any reason except to be with people. Also, when I'm with people I never feel tired and can always move on no matter what until I get home. The moment I sit on my bed, sometimes I don't move for an hour feeling extremely tired. And it's because it's so sudden I don't get it.

Originally Posted by velvet

If I have nothing to say, I ain't going to say anything.

Precisely how I am.

There are plenty of times when I'll talk talk talk, but it sure as heck isn't small talk when that happens, except when I'm goofing off with my friends (I love a good laugh even if the cause of the laugh is rather shallow, but other than that, when I talk, it's about something that means something to me.)

Kinda seems a bit like cold reading. But its certainly interesting.

Originally Posted by Dizko

Kinda seems a bit like cold reading. But its certainly interesting.

Your an extrovert I am guessing?


<-- complete introvert

The article seems to deal with pretty broad generalisations/extreme stereotypes.

I'm quite the introvert, and (now) I have no trouble at all in socialising with people. I find extroverts to be tedious, obnoxious, boring and dumb. Maybe that's a tad harsh, but there's nothing worse than having to put up with someone who cannot think without opening their mouths.

And yes, it certainly sounds like cold reading.