Hi everyone, i just need some advise on attaining lucidity and need to know if i understand the concept completely

From what I've read so far is that lucidity is when you are "awake" in your dream, that you can control your actions completely.
I also want to know how real the dreams have to be? like does the dream have to be as real as you see things in person?

I have had maybe 2 dreams when i was in about grade 2 that everything looked as real as it can get and i did have control in my dreams but i haven't had anything like that for years..
I have been trying to gain control of my dreams for about 4 days now but as soon as i realize i am dreaming the dream immediately becomes vivid and ends.

I've started keeping a journal of all my dreams because I've read it improves your memory, i haven't been doing reality checks cause i am still not sure exactly what i'm supposed to do and i don't understand how reality checks can help cause if you are in a dream doesn't everything just feel the same and all of that? but i do notice i'm dreaming.

So what do all of you think could be the best thing for me to do??