FallenAwake

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID
BOLD IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT

Slipping a Picture Out

A younger man and a man who seemed to be something like his mentor. Doing some organizing or redecorating of some sort. Cleaning? Inside an old, historic feeling building. Many large windows around one end.

The younger man (was it me? I seemed to switch back and forth from third person to somewhat identified with him) had accomplished something, some landmark. He seemed like a learned novice. He had a picture of himself to mark the occasion.

The older man took a frame off the wall. The frame and its anchoring to the wall was complex, attached to a simple wood rod decoration with a few soft undulances and shallow, smooth, symmetrical crevices. It was dusty. Some old, shriveled cobwebs huddled against it. The frame somehow slid onto this bar to connect to the wall. He told the younger man that he was going to replace the older picture of another of his (students?) with this one. The younger man felt uncomfortable with this, knew it would upset the person who was being replaced. The older man didn’t open the frame, just slowly slipped the other picture out of the bottom, surprising the young man, who was me, and then slid the new picture in.

The new picture looked casual and somewhat professional, but not strong, solid, and fitting like the old picture. It looked too new, too much of a body shot, too bright, not authentic and serious and traditional enough, with muted colors, like the picture that used to be there. But it did look happier and younger.

The man whose picture had been replaced came over from the dim back of the building, which felt like an old bar. He was somewhat angry and jealous, disappointed, about his picture being removed. He didn’t feel positively toward the young man.

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID BOLD IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT


Dinner and “Centipede” Lizards Licking Legs

At dinner with 3 people. I felt younger, perhaps college age or just graduating. It was some kind of planned event, like a celebration. I thought we were there with others who were at different tables.

Three other people with me. Empty (used?) glasses already on the table, shoved to the side. Cluttered with, were they layers of old menus as “placemats”? Dirty, dusty, old.

They brought us drinks. Mine was a warm margarita-type drink. I wondered again about the service considering the warm drink. I drank it, flourishing it a bit like I was an old hand. I thought how I was trying to be something I wasn’t. Projecting a persona, and that wasn’t subtle enough. It didn't feel like me.

Me and the others didn’t seem too connected, but there was a comfort.

It took a loooong time for the food to come, if it did (I don’t recall).

A foot long creature came through the wall and walked under the table, turned right, and kept going. I followed. I called it a centipede in my mind but realized it was more like a lizard with 4 stumpy legs, like a long, unshelled turtle. Another one came, following the same path.

I sat back down, next to the girl (who had been a part of the 4 of us before?).

Yet another creature walked that path, and I wondered about them being young and is their mom about to come? Another young one. Then the mom, larger, with a more rounded mouth. She noticed us (unlike the children) and slowly opened her mouth near my leg. I thought she was going to lick me but maybe bite me.

I pulled my bare legs up onto the booth. She put her stumpy front legs up on the side of the booth but couldn’t reach me. She turned toward the other girl’s legs and slowly opened her mouth. The girl didn’t seem concerned and I cautioned her about the saliva, that it might be poisonous. The creature had a very large, wide almost human-like tongue. It seemed friendly. The girl let her lick her legs. The creature licked slowly and in wide strokes. I inspected the girl from a distance. She seemed fine, no reaction to a toxin if there even was a toxin in the saliva.

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID BOLD IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT


Progress

I woke up a few times throughout the night and realized I was dreaming, just barely waking and telling myself I was dreaming, hoping I was still in the dream (seemed about 2 seconds out of the dream), then tried to go back in lucid. Didn’t work that I recall, though I was happy that I was so quickly thinking that thought and focusing on being at the least aware of my dreams, if not lucid.


Restaurant Fragment

I saw a previous employer [who I’d had a blow-up with and left in waking life]. I was at his restaurant, it wasn’t significantly unpleasant that I recall. Was there dark water and the sidewalks were square “docks” that resembled rafts and warehouse pallets or was that another dream? If it was then I’ve dreamed about those docks/sidewalks at least three times.

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID UNDERLINED IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT

Walking with someone in a town I where I used to live.. I realized I needed to go back to my old house. I told them and walked the opposite way. The parting was kind of difficult.

I realized I was walking the round-about way to the house, picturing the map.

I started to approach a place I had worked (had to walk by it) I didn’t want them to know I was back, to think I’d stay. An old coworker walked out of the building. She looked beautiful in an unconventional way. I turned my head, wondered how to avoid her recognizing me. I thought about just walking past. I dropped my files [on purpose?]. I squatted to pick them up. She came over and we talked about me coming back to work. She said I should make sure to let “her”, the director, know that I wouldn’t be staying indefinitely. She stressed it.

I saw her words as written text, up close like they were the only thing in the world. I zoomed in further. A word or two related to what she was stressing were highlighted and bold and underlined [green or red or purple? Maybe all, seemed it changed color] I came back [or was it parallel?] to picking up the folders. There was one that was particularly important and the way it was stacked relative to the rest was of importance. I wasn’t sure how I should hold them again.

I felt trapped into the job, but also like I wanted to work there. I felt confused about what I was doing, why I was in this town again, where I was going after.