dream fragment

Dream - Lucid

I was walking down a dark, desolate road alone at night. I was going slightly uphill. The only building in sight was a well-lit house to my right. I then was talking to Ryan, though he wasn't there with me. We were either on the phone, or communicating telepathically. He was saying we could walk and meet up somewhere and go on a trip. I think I just wanted to drive. Plus, Ryan is married, and you would think that would be kinda weird...

I then saw Ryan and a bar chart of all the vacations he'd been on. It measured how much fun he had on each trip. The first one had the highest bar, and it was marked "Universal". He and I, in waking life, went to Universal Studios last year. Apparently, in the dream, it was the most fun vacation he'd ever had.

Then, I was at Ryan's house, though it looked a bit different from how it looked in waking life. I was sitting in the living room on the floor next to the couch Ryan was sitting on; there were two couches, the one he was sitting on, and the one his wife brought when she moved in with him. Across the room in a chair sat Ryan's wife. She was wearing an orange shirt. Well of course she's gonna be here, I thought to myself, Ryan is married now. I avoided looking her directly in the eye. We all sat around and talked. The whole thing was kind of weird for me. I kept thinking about how they were married now. I wondered about their relationship, about whether or not they've had a good marriage so far.

Someone then came to the door and knocked. Ryan's wife got up to get it. It was one of her friends. I then looked behind me, and could see upstairs (he doesn't have an upstairs in waking life). The door to their room was shut, but you could see a light on through the cracks. I guess they were hanging out alone. There was this almost awkwardness between Ryan and I, like he wanted to be with me, but he was married. I didn't really want to be with him per say, we just had a nice relationship at one point. I imagined myself snuggled underneath the covers of his bed.

Then, I was no longer at Ryan's, but I was checking on this device I had made to detect certain kinds of waves from different planets; I was trying to see if other planets were trying to communicate with us. The device I had was made out of Proactiv bottles? It was weird. But I got something from Neptune, though I wasn't sure exactly what it was. I figured it was probably just interference or something, but I kept my hopes up.

At some point, I remember writing on a piece of paper with different colored permanent markers. I picked up the paper, and saw that the ink had bled through onto the table.

Dream - Lucid

I felt myself falling asleep. I sat up out of my body, and went over to the other side of the bed. I looked around my dark bedroom, and then, decided to look at myself. My body was there, on its back (I fell asleep on my back), peacefully asleep, much different from the last time I had one of these experiences (last time my body was tense and afraid, eyes wide open and terrified). My body wasn't under the covers.

I went up to my body and stroked its hair, and said
"You are beautiful."

Then, I was in a room with Brett, my first long-term boyfriend that I dated in high school. I wanted to fly with him, since he was there with me. I grabbed his hand, and he said something, though I can't remember what; something along the lines of "what's going on?" or "where are we going?" I said back to him, trying to carefully choose my words,
"This is a lucid dream!"
He responded
"Oh right, a lucid dream," like he was agreeing with me that it was, indeed, a lucid dream.
I thought about whether or not he was a DC or an entity, since most of my DCs give me a blank, stupid stare or just outright deny that it's a dream when I call attention to the fact that I'm dreaming.

We then flew up into the sky, where either the sun was setting or the sky just had those sunsetty colors in it. I remember vividly feeling Brett's hand inside mine. We talked as we flew, but I can't remember what about. I then looked up and saw a starlit night sky and a beautiful, vivid red galaxy. I pointed it out to Brett. I thought about how this was the first time I had been able to fly with anyone hand-in-hand. I've tried before, but the person "weighed" me down, or someone else took me up to fly, and while we were ascending, I'd wake up.

~

I was in some mountain river or stream or something. This dream occurred during both the night and the day. This guy I went to high school with, Jason L., kept pushing me down into the flowing body of water, onto the rocks, etc., saying things to me as he did so. I don't remember what it had to do with, but it had some sort of purpose. I then remember seeing a body, not sure if it was mine, his, or someone else's altogether, but he/she busted their head on a rock, and bright red blood started to pour out. I started to freak out.

I remember talking to Jason L. civilly in this dream, and I remember trying to get out from under some rock and my vision kept shaking, like I was trying to get out from being stuck underneath a block in Minecraft.

There was a point where I became lucid again during this dream, but I quickly lost it.

There was more to this dream, but that's all I can really recall.

Dream - Lucid

I was at my house. It was like I was in a video game, and I was lucid. I don't remember at what point I became lucid, I just remember that I was.

I went into the piano room. It was very dark. I walked up to the piano, and faintly saw my mom sitting there, playing, though I didn't hear any music. I sat down on the piano bench next to her. She stopped playing. For some reason, I thought she was going to be upset with me. Instead, she put her left arm around me and hugged me. We pulled away, and in her mouth, I saw a light blue pacifier.

~

I was, again, in a video game. I was with my mom, dad, and my cat, though I'm not sure if my brother was there or not. We were outside in a field with trees, like a more realistic, less blocky-looking Minecraft. The sky was blue, but it didn't look sunny. My dad was holding something the whole time, I think it was my cat.

Also with us was JP. I didn't know how we got into this situation with him, I didn't know why he was there. He was being his sly, charming, shady self, and for some reason, we were following him around. I kept wanting to tell my dad that JP was bad news, but I didn't want to do it in front of JP, in fear that he would hurt me or my family. I was surprised my dad couldn't tell something was wrong with him, since he's a psychiatrist. Maybe he did, but had the same fear as I.

At some point, we met JP's dad, whom I've never actually met IWL (I don't think he ever met him either, actually). He had the shaggy brown hair and mustache, but he looked a bit different than my guide, I think. I only ever saw him at a distance. I want to say he was in some other "dimension" of the world.

We were then underneath some white stone pavilion. JP wanted access to the "rainbow realm", and my dad had the means to get there. I knew it was bad, bad news if JP had access to that world for some reason. But my dad gave him what he needed anyway. All I had wanted my dad to do was pull his gun and kill him, but I knew JP had a gun too, and I didn't want anyone else to get hurt who didn't have to. I then watched as JP put together the rest of his portal or whatever it was, and he was surrounded by a rainbow glow. I think it made him more powerful.

We were then in what was supposed to be the "rainbow realm", but it looked the same as the original dimension, save for JP's dad was there too. The next thing I knew, we were running from them. My mom and I were both holding a different Belle (my cat). The one mom was holding was white, like IWL Belle is, and the one I was holding was a smoky grey with some brown speckles mixed in. As we ran, JP and his dad threw knives at us. One hit the Belle that mom was holding. My mom tossed her dead body aside. As she did, I saw the body as it came by me. I saw the stab wound, and the cat was no longer white, but looked like the one I was holding.

I was getting tired; my legs felt like they were going to give out. JP's dad, the one pursuing me the most, threw a knife at me that narrowly missed. I then tripped and fell, exhausted. As I fell, to save the cat, I tossed her aside and hoped she ran away. JP's dad closed in on me, though I kept trying to crawl away.

I woke up before he caught me.

~

I was in my house in my brother and I's bathroom. There was something inside the shower behind the half-closed curtain, but I wasn't sure what it was. I took a brown Kroger shopping bag with some objects in it, and hit it, whatever it was; I never saw what I was hitting. I then saw Belle, my cat, come out of the shower. She looked like she had a little nick in her fur on her neck, but there was no blood or anything. She was just fine. I pet her a bit.

I then walked into some gym-type room with lots of exercise machines. Not where I needed to be, and as I was leaving, I saw a ton of machines on the wall, as in suspended on the higher parts of the wall. On one of them, an exercise bike I believe, I saw someone I went to high school with named Jason.

I was then back at my house. I went into my parents' bedroom. None of the lights were on, but it wasn't pitch dark, just kind of dim. I started to go into the bathroom, when I saw two white cats that looked like Belle right outside of it, one pouring blood from a wound in her head/neck area, and the other dead, her eyes lifeless and cloudy. I touched the dead one, who looked more like a kitten than a full-grown cat, and her body was cold. I looked to the other, a more grown up cat, and she was trying to keep walking on, trying to keep going despite the bloody gash in her head. I started to get very upset, because not only was a cat dead and the other critically wounded, I knew I had done it when I hit the thing in the shower. I knew it, and I knew that the Belle that I pet in shower did not get hit. It was weird. I started yelling for my brother to call someone so we could get this cat to the animal ER. I didn't have very high hopes of her making it.

~

I was at some house party with a bunch of people I didn't know. It was nighttime. I had been talking with some guy right outside the house, and apparently, I was being a smartass. In fact, I was an asshole apparently, according to everyone at the party. I don't think I was trying to be, really, I was just coming off that way.

They all started to kind of gang up on me, calling me a jerk and stuff, telling everyone who didn't know that I was a jerk. I took it by being a smartass back to them. Then, I decided to be nice and polite to everyone instead.
"I can be nice too," I said.
The main guy whom I had been talking to before said something like "Oh yeah?" back.
I then started to reintroduce myself to everyone with a huge, genuine smile on my face.
"Hi, I'm Krista, it's nice to meet you!" I said to the people around me, each individually, shaking their hands. That seemed to be working!

I then remember being inside the house for a little bit.

Then, outside again, I introduced myself to a guy that looked like Jonah Hill. I think someone brought him up to me so he could meet me. We chatted for awhile, and started to kind of like one another. I knew he was kind of getting a crush on me.

We then were on a brown, wooden boat on this very big lake. Things started to get Minecraft-y here (so who can guess what game I've been playing lately? ). The boat kept almost overturning, and then, I fell out of the boat. The water was very, very cold. So cold, my legs were going numb, and I could barely move them. The guy who looked like Jonah Hill (I'm just gonna call him Jonah from now on) helped me out of the freezing water and back into the boat.

The boat then overturned, and we both fell out. I remember being underwater and seeing him. I was trying to reach him before he went over a waterfall that was not far from us. The current would take us there if we weren't careful.

I then pulled out a dirt block (Minecraft) so I would float, and while underwater, picked up another dirt block, and swam more quickly to Jonah, who was heading straight for the waterfall. I gave him the dirt block so he'd float too, and pulled him to safety.

Then, we were back at the house where the party was, and he cutely asked me if he could have my number. I smiled and said
"Yeah! Hold on, let me go get my phone."
I went back in to get my phone.

Then, I woke up.

Dream - Lucid

I was watching something happen at a volcano. It was supposed to be some show. The host, a man, was using the volcano to help people. But the last person he helped, another man, had gotten killed by the eruption. There was a girl, the man's daughter, whom was about my age, telling me about it all, wanting someone to get him to stop before he killed someone else. That dad wasn't completely naive to the deaths, but he felt like it was doing more good than bad.

I remember being in Jake's apartment. I think that's where the girl lived.

~

I was looking at Facebook, scrolling through my timeline, and saw back to where I had a friend request from one of my old professors (we are Facebook friends IWL). I didn't know who he was at first, so I posted his profile picture, the back of what was supposed to be his head, covered in brown hair and looking in a mirror, but the mirror reflected the back of his head again. Next to the picture, I put his name, and wrote "Who is CH?". It didn't have any responses. Then, I saw that I figured it out and accepted his friend request.

At some point, I remember having to go on a trip somewhere. I was excited, but I couldn't figure out what clothes to pack, since all my white camisoles were dirty, and most of the clean shirts I had required I wear a white cami underneath.

There was more to these dreams, but I didn't really sleep a whole lot. My insomnia is back in full-swing (stressful week ahead -_-).

Dream - Lucid

I was in my house in the kitchen with someone, I want to say kind of a butch-looking girl. I went to the fridge and opened it to find some wine. I pulled out the bottle, and there was only about a glass left. I said something to the girl about there barely being any left, so I was just going to drink it from the bottle. I pulled the cork and put it to my lips.

Dream skip. Things get interesting here.

Someone, I think this girl I know in waking life named Jane, had lost her parents (not so in waking life) when she was younger. I was watching the scenario of how how she lost her mom. Apparently, she had lost her parents at different points, first her dad, then her mom.

The story was that they were at a beach when she was very young, probably about 6 or 7, and her version of the story was that her mother was killed by being swept out in powerful currents or something. I watched the beach come into view from above. I saw it was a sunny day. The beach was secluded and rocky, and lots of areas formed huge, strong currents between the rocks.

Then, it was like I was playing some weird version of Sim Earth, and I started trying to get rid of the currents by placing waves between the grey rocks where the current got strong. This just pushed the current outwards. I kept trying, and it kept doing the same thing, so I just deleted my wave placements to make it go back to normal.

Then, I was watching the young Jane and her mother, both very beautiful. Her mother seemed like a very, very kind woman. They were standing in very shallow water close to the shore by a huge rock formation at the very left side of the beach. Something happened to where Jane killed her mother, though it was not on purpose, but an accident. She was stabbed through the middle. I saw the wound, and it was bloody, but not too bloody. The present Jane then had this horrible realization that she had killed her mother, after thinking for years it had been the currents.

Then, I was getting out of my parked car on a sunny day at this Catholic church in my town. I was going to meet either Jane or Jake, I'm not quite sure anymore. I think it was Jake. I had to walk somewhere though, so I got out of the car, and started to walk away from the church. I got to the corner of the sidewalk, and to my right, I saw a little ways from me, two HUGE grey dogs. No collars, no leashes. They looked like Great Danes. As bad as I want a Great Dane (I do want one in waking life), I did not want a run-in with these dogs. I turned to my left, and again, a ways away from me were two more gigantic grey dogs.

I started back towards the church, trying to step cautiously as to not startle the dogs. Well, apparently, I wasn't taking enough care in my steps, because first two, then the other two, started to bound towards me. Not out of aggression, but they wanted to greet me. I am very small, even in waking life, compared to Great Danes, but these were even more massive and muscular than their waking life counterparts. I was walking by the parked cars in the parking lot as they started to jump on me excitedly. One bit me on the arm he was so excited, but not hard enough to make me bleed, though I did still feel the pain of the bite.
"Down! Sit! Stay" I started to say forcefully over and over.
They backed off a little, but not much. Then, right as I feel like I was getting to my car (I don't think I was going to leave, but I needed shelter), a Golden Retriever started to join in on the fun.

At some point during all this, I remember calling Jake. He asked if I wanted to meet him somewhere else or something, and I said yes.

I also remember seeing a photograph of Jake as a child, I think it was Jake anyway, in front of a building with some other children. Jake was not smiling. He looked angry and sad. He had lost his parents (it was bleeding in with the Jane story at that point).

I know I'm leaving some things out of here, especially in the part where Jane's mother is killed. But the most vivid part of the dream was the dog part, seeing them and being jumped all over by them. Odd.

Dream - Lucid

I was outside, I want to say I had been on some kind of mission. I was at the end of it, and the last thing I had to do was make a cut on some thin film of skin that was supposedly covering the bottom of my belly button...? I saw an example play out in front of me, and of course, there was blood. There were two ways you could do this, I don't remember the first, but the second was just simply using the scalpel to make the cut. They were illustrated by these icons in my vision, kind of like a video game screen. I didn't want to do it. I was too much of a chicken for the pain and the blood. I had gotten all the way there, and now, I was too afraid of a little cut.

~

This one is kind of jumbled...let's see if I can make sense out of it.

I feel like I was living in an apartment. I remember it being nighttime outside. I was supposed to be meeting with my friend Samira (whom in waking life I only know via the internet) for some reason. Apparently, we hung out a lot.

Then, I was going to get in the shower. I turned it on, and the shower head was messed up, so if the curtain wasn't all the way closed, water would get all over the floor. Well, water got all over the floor, semi-flooding the bathroom and soaking the small, white Mickey Mouse towel placed by the tub for one's feet when they got out of the shower. I think the towel was supposed to be Samira's. I started trying to clean it up with another towel. I picked up Samira's Mickey Mouse towel, and it was absolutely sopping wet. I remember talking to Samira about the towel, but she wasn't there. I guess it was kind of telepathically? I'm not sure. She laughed and said not to worry about it. We talked about other things as I got in the shower, but I can't remember what.

One of my neighbors was someone I know from the internet as well, but it was someone I don't talk to at all anymore, someone I'm not particularly fond of. Let's call him Sam.

I remember all the talks and stuff with Samira, who in the dream I called something else, something that started with a K, like Kera or or something like that, being very pleasant.

Dream - Lucid

I was in the bonus room at my house, and noticed that all the blinds were swarming with spiders. I couldn't believe I had actually ever touched or messed with those blinds. Something about a little girl and the blinds, I think someone was filming her for a movie or something.

I also remember being in the shower, and seeing the water being stained red with blood, and I was falling in and out of sleep as some guy told me he was worried about me because of how much blood was in the water. I felt very tired and out of it, and didn't really care too much about the blood.

Did not get much sleep last night, feeling pretty rough this morning. Bleh. -_-

Dream - Lucid

I was with my mom and brother outside a weird, cartoony house somewhere, though I'm not sure where. For some reason, I was really mad at both of them. It had something to do with the job I had in the dream, though I can't remember what the job was. I was crying and screaming at them irrationally with my mouth full of beans and mashed potatoes. I remember spewing some little crumbs out as I did so.

~

Something about watching these sex acts between guys and girls and also girls and girls. It was like it was happening to someone else as I watched, but it was indirectly happening to me? Like someone else and I were "getting away" with it. I remember we getting in my car in the parking lot at this outdoor mall we have, and getting stopped by cops. They talked to us through my open windows as we sat in the parking lot. We somehow were doing something illegal, though I'm not sure what. We talked our way out of it, and apparently had many times before, but I knew they were probably on to us.

~

I was with Jake (maybe?) at my house. We were collecting items...some of the sex dream from before somehow had something to do with this dream. Collecting the items had something to do with the sex acts. I remember running and jumping to get this brown paper three-pointed hat from atop a very tall shelf. Apparently, no one else could get this.
"Did you get it?" Jake asked.
I uncurled my fingers, and the hat was all crumbled in my hand, but would be just fine if I uncrumpled it. It wasn't ruined or anything.
"Yup!" I responded.

Not a very restful night of sleep last night, sadly. -_-

Dream - Lucid

I was in marching band again. We were having some sort of sleepover. It was nighttime, and we were in a house. Next to me was this girl that looked like someone who was in band with me in waking life, Nancy. She was a freshman and I was an upperclassman. For whatever reason, I had taken her under my wing, so to speak.

She asked me to pull a wedgie for her? I said ok, and she leaned forward, exposing the top of her panties. I noticed she was wearing two pairs of underwear, one peachy/skin-toned, and the other a bluish-green.
"This one?" I asked as I tugged the peachy one.
"Yes."
I pulled on it.

More happened in this dream, but I can't recall what right now.

~

I was in bed with JP. It was nighttime. We were in what looked like a hotel, but it was supposed to be at a school. We were both students. I'm not sure why we were in the same bed, there was another bed in the room but it was occupied I believe. I suppose it was like a dorm or something. The bed was next to a big window, with J being on the window side and I on the other. The window showed that we were on a higher floor, I think, and you could see trees and lights from buildings.

As we were laying in bed, he was saying something about my birthday being the next night, and how he was going to give me "birthday sex". I don't remember what I said. I wasn't really thrilled at the prospect, but this guy was scary (and is in waking life as well).

The next night, on my birthday apparently, I stayed in another part of the dorm/hotel. I was worried that JP would get upset because of this, but I didn't want to stay there with him. I then had this huge "flashback" of the college years ago, when a dead woman was found in an indoor pool, stabbed to death. They had to remove the body before they had a funeral service. I then made the terrible connection: JP was the killer from years ago. He was assuming a fake name at the college, the name James Holmes (the Batman movie killer from Colorado).

I knew I couldn't stay. I was in him and I's room, and the light was dim; nighttime again, but there was a lamp that was on on the nightstand. Someone called him and angered him. When he got off the phone, we were then in the living area, and a man appeared from a doorway, looking panicked and concerned. JP went and stabbed a man in the chest. I was sitting on the couch, watching in horror. He came to me then, and carefully chose a short, fat knife from the many knives that he had, all the while talking to me in a cool, calculated, heartless manner. I tried to back away, but he had me. He stabbed me in the lower left chest, but not too deeply, since I was resisting. I felt the pain as he cut me.

Then, it was like the scene was being replayed, only differently. We were in the room again, and his phone started to ring. I spotted a brown spider crawling on the floor with spindly, long legs. I got up to leave the room, and JP said
"You better not leave, this phone call may make me angry." I left anyway as he got on the phone.

I went to the living area and across the room to another door. I barged in and my parents were asleep in the bed there. My mom's head was facing the head of the bed, but my dad was sleeping opposite of her, with his head at the foot of the bed. I shook my dad first saying "Wake up! Wake up!" as I moved on to shake my mother. My mom woke up, and I frantically explained the situation. In the back of my mind, though, I knew we were doomed. She got out of bed, I'm not sure if she said anything. My dad was the only one of us there with the means to defend, and I could not wake him up. I kept trying, but to no avail. I then left the room and ran out the front door as fast as I could. I could run to the lights of the city, or the sparse, dim lights of some homes to my left. I went towards the homes, figuring he wouldn't be able to see me with the dim light. I tried to frantically think of what to do. Should I head to a house and try to knock until someone answered? Or should I run out to the woods? Either way, I felt doomed.

I awoke this morning being quite afraid still, the feelings carrying over from the dream to my waking self. I'm still calming down, and it's been over an hour since I woke up.

Dream - Lucid

I was with my friend Leigh, though I don't remember where, it was somewhere weird. We were looking at these colorful patterns on the wall. We had to choose from them for something. I kept thinking they reminded me of spirographs, but they weren't spirally at all; most were, in fact, star patterns. I told Leigh the ones I liked, which included some light blue shooting stars, some circle with a rainbow on the top, and I can't remember the last one. She didn't like the first one I picked, and so she told me the ones she liked. We both liked the one with the rainbow, and I think she said she liked the last one I picked as well.

~

I was in my room, and MK was there. She went into my closet to look for something, I'm not sure what, but she sounded upset about it; she said something in a whiny, sad voice. She knelt down at this old wooden toy box I have in there where I used to keep my pipe. I didn't want her to smell it, though it didn't really matter because she knows I occasionally smoke, but I rushed over and sat on the toy box anyway, and said something to her about whatever she was upset about.

I guess I must have left the closet at some point, because the next thing I knew, I was standing in my room again, and I figured out I was dreaming. I wondered if MK was still there. I went over to the closet, and before I opened it, I said I wanted Ray to be in there. I concentrated on that for a minute, then opened the closet door.
"Ray?", I said. Nothing. He wasn't there. Neither was MK.
But my closet had all these pretty dresses that weren't there before. I remember a poofy, prom-ish looking, sparkly light blue dress, and a small white halter dress with a big sparkly black belt around the waist. I really liked that one!

False awakening. I couldn't sleep, so I just decided to get up. I went to the computer, and my friend from Ireland, Ray, had messaged me on Skype.

Or had he? I thought I could see I had a couple of messages from him when I had been laying in bed, like maybe "Good morning" or something, but there wasn't really a message there. Maybe I should just go back to bed.

Laying in bed again, and I hear what sounds like a phone ringing (from the caller's end), and I rushed over to the computer. When I had went to lay down again, I had accidentally hit something to video chat with Ray. His face popped up in a thumbnail by his messages.
"Oh shit!" I said as I covered my mouth, "I accidentally video called you! I look awful!"
He didn't say anything, and I was trying to avoid looking right at the camera or his face.
"I'll be right back, I'm going to go make a cup of coffee."
I catch a glimpse of his face. The camera showed a side view of him at the computer. He was smiling. He looked kinda like another guy I know in waking life named Levi. I thought that as I walked off to go downstairs and make coffee.

When I got downstairs, I went to the Keurig carousel for some coffee. It was full; I guess my mom had gone to the store before she left for Wisconsin. I looked at all the different coffees, and noticed she had accidentally gotten decaf. It was some kind of decaf vanilla coffee I had never seen before. I looked at the other coffees. I picked one and put it in the machine.

I then looked at the refrigerator, and had a feeling I was dreaming again. I looked at some advertisement that was magnetted to the fridge, looked away, and looked back again, and the words had changed. I can't remember what they said. I kept doing that and the words kept changing. I was so amused, I was reading the new phrases aloud as they changed, kind of narrating what was going on.

I then went back upstairs and decided I needed to go fly. I walked into the bonus room and to the two big windows at the far end. The couch was still there (we got rid of it recently in waking life), so I climbed it and started to try to break the window by ramming my body into it. I was met with very realistic resistance. So I tried it again and again. I had a vague feeling of being trapped, and that it was my subconscious telling me something. I kept ramming the window until it finally gave. Parts of it broke, but the window itself tumbled to the concrete below. I watched it fall and shatter.

I then stepped outside. It was a nice, sunny day. In the dream, there was some roof there for me to stand on (not so in waking life). I started to wonder if I was really dreaming, or if this was real and I was losing my mind. I thought about people who confuse dreams with reality. So I decided to try to hover a little before I flew. I kept jumping up and down with less-than-promising results. I did know that I was dreaming, though. I didn't worry too much about all that after the initial "Holy shit I'm going to have to pay for that window and get locked up in the loony bin" moment.

I then had another false awakening. I was laying in my bed, staring at the ceiling, but I knew I was dreaming immediately this time. I actually had a ton of FAs, a lot more than I can really remember other than me waking up and losing the dream again. This seems to happen to me quite often in LDs--if I have one FA, you can bet I'll probably have more.

I then was at the bottom of the stairs, trying to think of how I could properly spend this LD. I wanted to have a deep, spiritual experience, but I didn't know how to induce it. I kept thinking I had to slow my breathing down and really calm my mind, but I felt my waking body breathing, and it didn't feel like I was able to take in enough oxygen, even though I was breathing through my mouth. I tried to concentrate on getting in touch with my inner self (or "higher self", whichever you prefer), which is one of my lucid goals, one that I think will be very beneficial if I can properly implement it.

Then, I felt the buzzing of SP, and my vision turned to some hypnogogia. I then was having yet another FA in my bed.

I didn't know what to do with all this lucid time. So I decided to get down and dirty and have sex with Ray. If you want to read the explicit details,

Spoiler for explicit content:

He was then there, and we were getting naked. I kept kind of losing the dream, but kept concentrating on keeping it. I was surprised at how well this was working out. Usually, in these kinds of situations, I get too excited and wake up...it is actually something I've been working on in my LDs .

I do feel like I lost it once, but it wasn't for long enough for me to wake up. I was then on the dresser, mostly naked, and he was on top of me. For a second, I was looking at the ceiling, and it looked like a chalkboard with words written on it that kept changing. I touched it, and it felt like...well, a chalkboard. I then shifted my attention again. I noticed his pants were still on, and they started to slide down as he got on top of me. There's a mirror on my dresser, and I watched as he entered me. I kept almost losing the dream, but I never did. In fact, it was very vivid...and sexy. I finally came, and it was ridiculously good. Like...ridiculously good.

Then I finally woke up.

And all I have to say now is hot damn. Probably the best sex dream I've ever had.

Dream - Lucid

I was somewhere with my mom. We were inside, and I remember the colors being bright tones of purple, blue, and there was some darker red in there. She was showing me how to cut things with a machete. I don't like knives or things like that, it's kind of an irrational fear I posses in waking life, and apparently in my dreams too. I wasn't really too scared though, more just worried that she would slip up and hurt me. I kept thinking that a machete blade was so sharp, it would slice at the slightest contact.

My mom was showing me some way to cut where you threw it in the air and it would come back down. When she did that, it grazed my left thumb. It didn't hurt, and I looked at my thumb and didn't notice anything immediately weird, but then I saw a slight line that went all around the pad of my thumb. I told my mom I needed to go to the hospital right away. I touched the cut part of my thumb, and it was barely attached. It then started to ooze some blood out the sides of the cut. Then I noticed the pain. I held the piece of my thumb to the rest of it, worried it would fall off and I wouldn't be able to save it. I knew there was a time limit on reattaching digits and limbs, and I wasn't about to let that piece of my thumb go.

We were then at the hospital, which had the same color scheme as wherever we were before, and we went up to the counter. I was holding my thumb, and telling the ER nurse that we needed to get in quick. I hoped she thought it was enough of an emergency to send us back right away.

Thankfully, she did. We were sent back, and my mom told me that they would put this clear gel stuff around the cut that would "dissolve part of the nerve". I thought they were going to kill my thumb, but I think it was designed to seal the wound quickly, kinda like a heavy-duty liquid band-aid.

I sat down, and a man with messy brown hair that was a bit shorter than mine and a mustache sat across from me and started to doctor my thumb. I couldn't watch as he lined the cut with the gel. My mom was sitting to my right getting the same thing done by a woman doctor I think. She didn't have a cut though, so I wasn't sure why she was doing it. Oh well.

When the doctors were done, we got up. My mom showed me the veins in her wrist, and how the medicine was causing some of them to look a white-ish clear color. I then put my wrist out and noticed the same thing. Apparently, that was a normal reaction to the medicine.

I looked at my thumb, and it looked like it was healing well enough. No blood, and I could barely see the cut anymore. Then, I saw my cat underneath a kitchen table and some chairs, and she was messing with something that apparently was supposed to be my thumb, but looked nothing like it. It was this small white thing, maybe it was the cat's paw or something. At any rate, part of it came off, and some string thing extended from it, like that's what was holding it together. I then saw that the pad of my thumb has fallen off, leaving an indention where it had been before. Well crap, that sucks. I accepted it, however, since there really wasn't anything else I could do about it. I examined the thumb, and it looked like someone had just scooped a bit from the middle. It still had the lines and creases of a fingerprint. I felt alright about it, I knew it was something I just had to get used to.

~

I was in my room, and my mom came in and started to look through my stuff since the people painting our house had to do something in my room (IWL we are having the house painted). I went into my closet and watched her do it, hoping she wouldn't get into my top dresser drawer where my pipe was. She then headed over there and asked something about the dresser. My POV then switched to me being behind the dresser. She started to open the drawer, and I ran out and shut it, saying
"You don't want to look in there. Please don't look in there."
She didn't argue or anything, she just opened another drawer instead.

Then, I remember walking out of Peck Hall, a building at my old college, and I was with some other people, my friend JT being one of them. He had his arm around me. In front of me, I saw the back of a girl in a cute black sun dress with grayish flowers on it. She was wearing a headband in her straight blonde hair. It looked just like my good friend Kacey, whom in waking life moved away to another town last year. I asked JT if it was Kacey, and he said no. I knew it couldn't have been anyway. We kept walking.

~

I remember a brief fragment about Gabriel texting me saying he was busy or something.

~

I was in my room again, looking at some painting that The Sandman apparently did, of an Indian girl getting fucked by a white dude on my bed by the closet...I could hear him explaining it to me. It wasn't his original plan to paint that, he had just started to paint a hand on the closet door, and he was inspired to paint two people fucking. Lolwut.

Then, there was some weird black contraption in my room. It was a dolly that the painters were using to carry packages or heavy loads, but at first I thought it was a weird sex toy. I touched something that protruded from the center, which I assumed was used for, well, sexual purposes. Hmm...interesting. I then saw the wheels and realized what it really was.

I then saw this guy laying on the floor next to this girl I had some classes with in waking life named Natalie. At least I think it was her. Anyway, she was giving this guy shot after shot in the leg, right where it bends, a little below the side of the knee. They were supposed to be steroid shots or something. Natalie was giving the shots like a professional nurse would. They were talking as she gave him the shots. I said something about my mom getting steroid shots in her shoulders for her pain. He would occasionally say it hurt, but they would keep talking.

She finally finished giving him shots. I have no idea how many he gave her; it was quite a few. I saw the part of his leg that was getting the shots was slightly swollen in the spots the needles had gone in.

I finally got to sleep last night after struggling for hours to do so. I take ambien to sleep now, and I guess I've built up a tolerance, or this batch just sucks. Either way, it's not helping me sleep right now. I had to take an allergy pill to even have any hope I would fall asleep, which I obviously finally did after sitting up half the night watching documentaries on Netflix. Hoping that a visit to the doctor will straighten out the sleeping meds problem. I do eventually need to get off the Ambien, and I will once my life slows down a bit.

Dream - Lucid

All I can recall is walking through a parking lot outside of what reminded me of this Mexican restaurant I frequented in high school.

I barely slept at all last night...damn you, insomnia! Screwing up my dreaming endeavors.

Dream - Lucid

Finally, some good recall again!

I was with Jake. I can't quite remember where.

Then, I was sitting at my desk putting a baggie with a tiny piece of a marijuana bud in it in an envelope for my friend, Grace (who doesn't smoke in waking life). I was going to mail it to her. I felt like I had mailed marijuana before and it wasn't a big problem (yeah, I'm not dumb enough to do this in waking life).

I then was walking through what was supposed to be a high school or something. I was still with Jake. I then saw my reflection in something we walked past, not a mirror but a very reflective surface, and I looked quite a bit different. My hair was short and straight and styled in a bouffant fashion. I was wearing a short skirt, red I think, but I don't remember what kind of top I was wearing. I looked at it for a second as we walked by.

I again saw my reflection, and it looked the same as before, bouffant hairdo and all.

Then, we were walking through a garage, still at the school apparently, and I was smoking a cigarette. As we walked up the stairs to the door to exit the garage, I flicked the butt behind me, not watching where it landed. My dad was then walking with me, and commented on the stink of the cigarettes (apparently lots of people smoked here).

~

I was going to Jake's. I went into his apartment, and immediately thought that the locks had been changed for the new roommates moving in, and I didn't have the new key. Oh well.

I walked through the apartment, which looked much different than in waking life. I remember walking past a cabinet with these two new, gold locks on it. On the living room couch were his two new roommates, two college guys. I remember one having a very short black mohawk and being shirtless. I don't remember what they were doing, I think they were just drinking soda or something. They didn't even seem to notice as I walked in.

I then went to Jake's room. It was super messy, and he was sleeping on what looked like a cot in the middle of the mess, kind of close to the door. I woke him up and said something about his new roommates.

~

There are some fragments that I can't really place.

One, I was watching something on TV in my room with my mom, when the bouffant girl that was supposed to be me in the last dream came on TV. I got excited and told her about the dream. She smiled and got excited too (lol she wouldn't get excited in waking life).

Another was of me driving topless. I felt exposed. Why the hell was I driving topless?

I then remember something about seeing my old cat, Pounce, or at least a cat that looked just like her. This triggered lucidity, and I looked at my hands to stabalize, but I immediately lost it and went into a non-lucid dream.

~

I got a text from my pen pal, Gabriel, whom in waking life I've never met in person, and who lives in another state. It said
"Wanna get a drink?"
I hadn't realized he had texted me; it had been about 30-45 minutes since he had asked me. I got really excited and I told him yes, but he didn't answer right away. It was kinda late too, like 8:30pm or so.

So I got online and ordered some ticket to some bar in Franklin, the town he lived in in the dream. I then somehow had the small white ticket. It looked like a ticket to a movie.

I was then in the kitchen at my house, My mom was then telling me how she wanted me to help her with something. I told her I wasn't going to be coming home that night. She asked why, and I said I was going to go get a drink.

I realized that he never answered my text. I then called him, and he picked up on the first ring. I was a little nervous about talking to him.
"Hello?" he said.
"Hey."
"Hey."
"I do want to get a drink."
That's about all I remember of the conversation, though I'm sure there was more. I felt more at ease as we talked. His voice was soft and deep; comforting.
I think he texted me his address.

I then left. It was dark, obviously, since it was late. I only had about an hour and a half to drive (only 30 min. away in waking life).

I was then at his place. We went into his room, and he was talking to me as he went through some stuff on his bed. He had already bought this six pack of hard lemonade-type drinks. So I guess we were drinking at his place. His apartment seemed a little messy, but it wasn't bad. He had short black hair, looked youthful, and was a little shorter than the average guy. He actually would later in the dream remind me of someone I'm acquainted with in waking life, Tony.

I sat down at a desk chair, and we started on our hard lemonades. We were talking, having a good time, feeling each other out since we'd never actually met in person. I was a little skeptical just because I felt like I kinda rushed into getting drinks with him, but he seemed gentle, nice, and genuine.

At one point we were talking about the lemonades. He was already on his second, and I was still on my first, though it was almost gone.

I then fell asleep. I woke up, and didn't see Gabriel. I went to the bag the six pack was in, but all the lemonades were gone. I guess I had been out long enough for Gabriel to drink the rest.

My mom then came in and did or said something, I can't remember, but I thought it was insane that she even knew where I was, that she even knew his address. Weird.

Then, Gabriel came back in with a bunch more booze. He pulled out amber liquor and beer, which was the same color. I started to open one up, but realized it was liquor, so I started to open up another, smaller bottle instead. I actually wasn't sure if it was liquor or beer or something else altogether, but I poured it into a glass and started to drink it. The flavor wasn't bad, though it tasted muted for some reason. I could taste the slight bitterness, but it was fine.

Then, we were talking again, I think I mentioned something about my mom coming over. I was a little tipsy, but mostly I think I was just tired. Gabriel started talking to some of his friends, whom I think were supposed to be his band. They were looking at instruments that were in what now seemed to be a mixture of Gabriel's place and a music store. This is the part where I really thought he looked like Tony. He made hand gesture to his mouth to tell the guys we were drinking. The next thing I remember, they were gone.

At some point, I noticed his bed. It was a queen with old, dusty, worn-looking white bedding. I thought it would be perfect to share with him.

I then took too big a sip of my alcohol. I let it sit in my mouth for a second, afraid to swallow cause I didn't want to puke, but sucked it up and did it anyway. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, it was just fine.

I feel like my mom was there again. Someone was, anyway, and I was laying on my stomach on a bed or something. Gabriel then put his hand on my back. A big smile painted my face. His touch was so gentle and soft. I trusted him a lot more then.

Finally, Gabriel said he was going to go to bed. I asked him if he wanted me to stay or go.
"Ummm..." He was thinking.

I then was woken up to hearing my neighbor call their dog.
"Sawyer!!!"

Oddly, in the last dream, I think part of me knew it was a dream. I didn't want to wake up, and I remember looking at my hands trying to keep the dream, but I wasn't actively lucid. It was just "in the back of my head" or something. I dunno. Either way, I'm not going to classify it as lucid.

Dream - Lucid

I was in my car, looking at my gas gauge. Close to empty, even though I just got gas. I pulled into the gas station. I thought about my dwindling funds.

I then remember seeing an above view of two old men sitting in chairs across from one another. One passed a magnifying glass to the other. I think they were reading with it.

Then, I remember panic, and seeing a white cat clock with the arms going haywire. Something was going on with this, some kind of torture or something. I put my hand on the arms of the clock to stop them.

~

I was trying to fall back asleep this morning after being awake for an hour or so.

I slipped into a dream, and I was concentrating on staring at my laptop screen. I thought I was still trying to fall asleep. As I concentrated on the background, I could see "behind" the current picture that's there, and there was a picture of my cat sitting in my messy room. I felt like that meant I was falling asleep. I then started to feel the SP buzz in my head, but I got to excited, and lost the sensation.

Then, I was standing on an overhang overlooking the top of a staircase. I heard a conversation between a man and a woman, the man I think was the woman's son. They were fighting. The man, who reminded me of Jake's dad and one of my old friends, Alan, said
"Well what do you think I'm doing up there all the time? Smoking?" I could feel his anger, but that's precisely what he had been doing. He was going up the stairs as he said this. I was worried he would lose his temper and someone would get hurt.
I don't remember the woman's answer, or if she even did answer.

I then looked at the wall beside the staircase, and there were these small square patches cut out with white and green cloth inside of them. I then felt like it was Austin's grandparents' house, and I knew why the wall was like that: They had been trying to fix the wall, or tile it, but they had just never gotten around to finishing the project.

Dream - Lucid

I was with my mom, brother, and MK at a house that definitely didn't look like any I've lived in. I'm not even sure where we were, it felt like a mixture of my town now, a place in Oregon, and a desert.

Outside, the clouds were starting to get dark. I saw a particularly dark patch of clouds behind the house. I then saw something on the weather channel about how the storms that were coming had a history of producing tornadoes. And by having a history, they meant that the storms produced tornadoes years ago, at least that's how it felt in the dream. The storms had been around for a long time, just not in the area I was in.

I looked out the window at the sky, and couldn't tell if the darkest of the clouds was moving towards us or away from us. I thought they looked like they were moving mostly towards us, but not dead on. While trying to gauge this, an old man that had been standing beside me said that the clouds were moving towards us.

Then, off in the distance, I saw a pretty good sized tornado. It was pretty much staying in place as it twisted. I looked at it for a second to take it in, and briefly I saw it on a basketball court in someone's driveway with a basketball player? Anyway, I said to my mom and brother (MK wasn't there anymore)
"Tornado! We need to get in the shelter!"
So we started to go outside to the shelter. My mom and brother were in front of me as we walked out the door. I then remembered that my cat, Belle, was still in there.
"Wait! I have to get Belle!" I said.
I turned around and went back in the house to get Belle. The room I entered had all the lights turned off, and the carpet was navy blue. Belle was laying on the floor all stretched out as cats like to do. I scooped her up and went back out the door.

My mom and brother had left, and I had no idea where the shelter was. I started to walk up this very steep, grassy slope into a wooded area. I then noticed that Belle was no longer in my arms. I turned around, and she was a few feet in front of me. I started to go towards her, but she ran. I was calling after her, so scared I was going to lose her, when she ran into a black man and he bent down to pick her up.

Then, right before I woke up I had this weird image of a bunch of Middle Eastern people in a movie. As they spoke, (mostly) black glyphs appaeared over them, kind of like weird subtitles I suppose. I remember one glyph looking like an emblem of some sort; it was a circle with a big "S" in the middle, and it was embellished with wings and intricacies with some spots of red and blue in it. It was the beginning of a word.

Then, I was seeing a Middle Eastern news cast with the anchor at a desk outside with a horse mascot head on. Otherwise, he was wearing a suit, or something nice.

During/right after that last part, I was trying to remember the dream I had just had. It was really weird, like I was still kinda dreaming but I was still consciously trying to remember the tornado dream. Not sure how else to explain it...it was odd.

~

I was in a dorm looking for an outfit to wear. Jake was with me. I was going through my closet, looking at what I had.