• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views

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    Non-Lucid Dreams

    1. Thoughts on what lucid dreaming means to me

      by , 05-17-2024 at 09:01 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Before bed I was reading a novel and when I went to sleep the story just continued on throughout the night in my dreams. I kept waking up with the characters and plot going through my head and I could hear the characters voices. There were no visuals, it felt like I just never stopped reading and the experience continued.

      I haven't been carrying on any dream related practices in quite a while now. It just takes so much effort for so little results for me. I'm just thinking about my motives for lucid dreaming in general right now.

      I've always been fascinated by various ways of exploring altered experiences. Gaming being a big one that dominated my life early on. I touched on some psychedelics a bit but never went too deep because I would rather have control over having an intense experience.

      I guess freedom and control are things I've been chasing in my life, two things I didn't have much of early on. Escaping the status quo has always been my default means of viewing my life. I couldn't accept things most people take as totally normal. Like spending 8 hours of my day working, couldn't stand it.

      Ever since my first accidental lucid dream at around ~8 or so years old, I've looked at the phenomenon as a sort of anchor point in a way. That there is a potential world inside of me that offers complete freedom and creativity, even if it is brief and difficult to achieve.

      Not sure where I'm going with this, I think it's just that I haven't been happy with the way this experience of life has been. It's just felt restrictive and plain and the potentials for it to be otherwise are just so high. With how technology is going the future generations may be having the kinds of experiences I wish I had in this time. I mean, even in the next 40 years things should get pretty interesting, so barring anything crazy happening I'll probably be able to experience that.

      I guess I'm just bored.
      non-lucid , side notes
    2. Awoken from dream sleep

      by , 04-16-2024 at 04:49 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      I recently found an older SSILD tutorial on reddit that answered some questions I had about some aspects of it, so I’ve been trying it out the past few nights and felt like I was getting somewhere with it.

      Around 6 or 7am a plant light turned on in another room too early, so I got up and turned it off. When I went back to sleep I went through 5 or 6 quick SSILD cycles, then began the slow ones. I feel like when I’m focusing on my tactile sensations I’m making progress, I think I fell asleep during one of those cycles.

      One thing to note is that I had a benadryl around 6PM or so, my seasonal allergies were going crazy yesterday for some reason.

      Awoken from dream sleep

      On the side of a large smooth sloping hill/mountain there are many large nests attached to it with human sized eggs in them. I'm sleeping in one with two eggs around me. Something strikes the nest and I hear voices calling to me. I'm very tired and I look over the edge of the nest down the hill, there's a walking path down there that hugs the side of the mountain. P and a man are there looking up at me waving.

      P looks very excited and shouts up to me that I should wake up and join them. I go back into the fetal position and shut my eyes, I just want to sleep. They continue calling for me so I get up and find myself walking with them on the path.

      The situation is that P is looking for a new boyfriend and she had spent her time with this guy and now she wants to spend some time with me.

      P is now showing me a motherboard that she's building. She's talking about how she plans to put a chip in a specific spot that will translate the audio of a game she's playing into German. I feel like she's just saying that because I'm learning German and she's probably not actually interested in learning it.

      As she's talking I look at her, she's still looking at the circuitry talking away, the thoughts in my head drown out her words. I think to myself how beautiful she looks but also that I need to be with someone that I truly resonate with, I remind myself that I don't think that she and I would ever work out together.

      Suddenly we're in my kitchen and I'm completely lucid. I turn to her and say "... I'm lucid?" She's holding a bag of popcorn, she puts a piece in her mouth nodding and says "Yup!". I walk over to her and ask her if I can borrow the bag of popcorn, she hands it to me and I take it.

      I put the bag up to my nose and smell the hot air coming out, which of course smells like popcorn. I walk around my kitchen while smelling the popcorn, I'm very aware of the tactile senses of my body.

      I turn to P and say "It's so stable, like, it's SO stable!" She just smiles and says "Yeah I know!" She adds "Can I have the popcorn back?” I say sure and hand it off to her. I go over to various counters and look at labels on different packaging that I find. I find myself slightly less grounded since I don't have the hot popcorn wafting into my face anymore so I shift my attention back to the sensations of my body. I'm so caught off guard that I'm lucid, I just take in what's around me.

      As I turn around I find myself in a dark place that feels like an underground parking lot with hardly any lights on. There's a group of maybe 8 or so people huddled very closely together faced inward. It reminds me of that scene in 'I am Legend' when he finds those zombie like people in a dark building huddled together.

      I imagine a spotlight is shining down on them and it happens. The people are looking at me squinting, shielding their eyes with their hands. One guy says "Could you not?" My recall ends around here.
      lucid , non-lucid , side notes
    3. The Assassin - Spring competition night 6

      by , 04-04-2024 at 05:37 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Since my last 'no caffeine' test I've resumed with going back to drinking coffee/etc but I've been wondering if it has been messing with my recall because it's just been terrible recently. So as of yesterday I'm again off the caff.

      The Assassin

      Inside of a dimly lit apartment I find someone knocking on the door. An asian woman comes in and a time lapse begins, showing the progression of several hours. It ends with us in the bedroom sleeping together.

      She wakes and is looking for something through two boxes. I go over to her side and think to myself that these are some boxes she must've brought here with her tonight. It's still very dark and difficult to see but I notice one of the boxes were full of yogurt containers. It looks like they are all bloated and leaking. "You know these should be refrigerated right?" I mention, but she seems to have other priorities right now.

      There's knocking on the front door, I head over and open it up. There's a group of ten to fifteen asian boys in a semi-circle around the deck, all around 15-ish in age. They're all saying the same word over and over again but it's hard to tell what it is over their accents. Then I notice something on the ground by the rightmost teen. At first I thought it was a Furby but I recognize that it's Gizmo from those old Gremlin movies.

      I point at it and say "Gizmo!" as I simultaneously realize that's exactly what they've been chanting the whole time. I get a kind of foreboding and ominous vibe from the situation, I shut the door and go back to my room.

      The woman reveals to me that she's an assassin and that she's doing some work in the area. I ask her if that's why there's a bunch of guys at the door. This puts her on high alert, she hands me a gun and says something about being found out and takes off.

      I suddenly find myself outside looking up at a walkway that wraps around a building, it could be a motel. The assassin woman is struggling to get away from a man that is behind her with one arm around her waist and another over her mouth.

      I still have the gun she gave me earlier, I take sight at the man but they're so close to each other, I don't want to risk shooting her. She shoved him away at one point and I pull the trigger, but an airsoft bullet comes out and it weakly arches downward. I wait for another opportunity to shoot and this time the gun fires violently loud, my recall ends here.

      The slaughter house

      As a floating perspective I view the inside of someone’s house that is being checked out by two police officers. The officers are saying there were reports of pigs being raised in this house and they wanted to see if that was the case. The owner is walking along with them with his ~5-ish year old son following the action. The cops only check a few rooms and then leave the house, satisfied that there were no pigs here.

      Then from one of the rooms they didn’t check a small piglet comes running around the corner the father grabs it and says to the son that he’ll have to kill it now. The child protests and asks why? The father says if he kills whichever pigs venture out this far into the house it will encourage the other pigs not to do so, as he lifts the piglets head and brings out a blade.

      My perspective leaves the house before I see/hear what happens next. I’m now semi-lucid and really disgusted at this man. I fly above the house and focus on the roof, I begin crushing it with my mind. The shingles and wood start splitting and bunching up towards a central point in the middle of the house. I think that this isn’t a productive way to teach the guy how fucked up his actions were as my semi-lucidity fades.

      Updated 04-04-2024 at 06:31 PM by 106

      non-lucid , side notes
    4. Parachuting into Mexico - Spring competition night 3

      by , 04-02-2024 at 05:43 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      I performed about 5 decent reality checks today and meditated for about 10 minutes before bed.

      Parachuting into Mexico

      I’m parachuting in over a landscape that appears to be Mexico. As I’m falling I’m looking at the roads and I get the dream knowledge that the wind here only blows in one direction. When the dirt and dust collects on the roads on the highway so that half of the roads are covered, instead of clearing the dirt off they build and extend the thickness of the roads so that they are the correct width again. I was wondering if all of the dirt was cleared off the one side of the road from all the times this happened, how thick would it be? I imagined the highways thickness extending like a massive parking lot.
      Is it possible to kill an annoying dog without doing it?-1.jpg

      I land near a military outpost and I walk over to the side of the road and start kicking away the dirt and dust. Sure enough it uncovered more paved road. I kicked back maybe two feet of dirt before I was finished testing this.*

      Going back to the outpost, it seemed like there was only one guy here. I mentioned how strange the road thing was here but he wasn’t familiar with the concept. He had a nice car parked by us and I was gauging in my head how much he must earn working here because of it.

      Card game

      A group of guys got together and designed a card game. Each card had stats like health and attack. There was a board with many pieces as well. Then they randomly dealt out the cards and decided that this initial dealing is how the game is required to be played every time a new game is started. They preserved the cards and the board the way it was set up so that future games can reference its current setup as how to start the game.
      Is it possible to kill an annoying dog without doing it?-2.jpg

      *This dream is one of those themes where I'm completely absorbed in some strange dream detail. Going to make an effort IWL to be more aware when problem solving novelties.

      Updated 04-02-2024 at 05:59 AM by 106

    5. PA Again - Spring competition night 2

      by , 03-31-2024 at 05:36 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      PA Again

      It was dark out and ominous feeling, I was in the front of the PA house. I'm not sure what happened here but I feel like cars were being moved around, reparking.

      I'm now inside of the PA house and there's a sports car in the living room. V is in the driver seat and I'm in the passenger seat. L is in the living room and he begins playing some music. V turns on the radio in the car and it immediately drowns out what L is playing. L kind of looks over unhappily but leaves it at that.

      The car has a very long rectangular screen that stretches from the driver side all the way across the passenger side. V is now playing some game on that screen, using the car's steering wheel and other controls to play the game - it involves aircrafts shooting at eachother.
      New Avatar/Sig-1.jpg

      I feel like I have mainly two types of dream themes. One being that I'm sort of just watching things happen in my dreams, often silently observing and just going along with it with minimal interactions - or mainly acting reactively. I don't feel like I'm in the driver seat often (or in this particular dream, literally).

      And the other theme is where I’m very engaged trying to figure out something novel or puzzle-like and I’m really absorbed in understanding the oddities that are in front of me.

      Looking at my day to day life I can see why my dreams are like this and I can pinpoint some changes I can make that would help with increasing my awareness with these scenarios.

      Updated 03-31-2024 at 07:24 PM by 106

    6. Sunny ranch

      by , 03-28-2024 at 05:51 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      I haven't been focusing on dreaming as much recently from being pretty busy. I also have some work projects starting next week so I feel like I'll be drifting out of this phase of my attempts to re-connect with lucid dreaming, but I'm still going to try to maintain my practices as best I can anyways.

      I woke up in the middle of the night with a lot of dreams in mind, but I didn't want to write them down since I haven't been able to get back to sleep as well after doing so recently - so I skipped those ones.

      Sunny ranch

      I'm at a ranch and it's very sunny and bright out. There are a lot of people I know here, but I'm mainly with James, Tami and Elisabeth. The wife and husband of this ranch were showing us around, they bring us into a barn - I can't recall what was in there but I feel like it was empty. As we were leaving it they pointed out a very low electric fence to make sure we stepped over it.

      Then the husband and wife were shooting a music video around a truck. There was a camera man and music playing. On the ground were rolls of cash that members of the production would pick up and toss above the camera to have flutter down on the husband and wife. I looked at one of these rolls of cash and noticed it wasn't prop money but real USD cash. I picked it up, took off the band which was keeping it together and tossed it above the singing couple.

      I'm walking away from the shoot and notice Tami and Elisabeth on a tall fence in the distance waving at me. I meet up with them and James finds us as well. We go into the main house building and there's a large party going on here. Akiko comes in and says something to me but it's so loud I can't hear her. James nodded at whatever she said, I asked "What did she say?" he leaned over and spoke but the party was so loud I also couldn't catch what he said as well.
    7. Rotary banquet and unlimited loot

      by , 03-18-2024 at 08:04 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      These dreams took place between 11:21pm and 5:11am

      Rotary banquet

      I’m at a sort of banquet dinner event, it’s a similar dining room to the PA house one but it’s very elongated. Instead of one long table stretching down the middle of the room it’s roughly ten shorter oblong tables in sequence down the room. People seem to be walking in circles around their tables, it was reminiscent of chainsaw teeth going around the metal part of a chainsaw.

      My role is to put butter on things*, I’m standing there with a plate that has a stick of butter on it and also holding a butter knife. I’m at the end of one of these tables and am not walking around in circles like the others. As people rotated past me I would put butter on random plates, they were going too fast for me to even consider what I was applying it to.

      I run out of butter pretty quickly and I go searching for more. I find Linda near a washing machine downstairs**. She seems to be in charge here so I ask her where I can find some more. She takes half a stick of butter out of the washing machine and is hesitant to give it to me as it’s the very last of it. We were wondering if it was going to last until the end of the event, I said there were five hours left and chances were that we would run out.

      Unlimited loot

      James and I are inside of a Diablo-esque universe. We’re fighting a boss and after we kill it I gather my loot. I get some sort of legendary item, and then another, and another. I keep getting these amazing items over and over again, James and I look at eachother like the game is bugged. This keeps going on until my entire inventory is full. Floating text appeared in front of us that said “Hmm.. That’s odd, best keep your eye on those items..” We both agree that a large portion of the items were probably cursed or something to that extent.

      Now we’re in a city that feels like a cross between Agrabah from Aladdin and Lut Gholein from Diablo II. We’re fighting alien bugs that are swarming us and we’re armed with guns on the top of a building. When shot they explode into vibrant green goo.

      I notice near the side of the building are a bunch of glittering jewels embedded into it. I have to lean over the edge to grab one, I take hold of a ruby and pried it out. Since my inventory was full it immediately replaced a legendary item, which popped out in front of me and fell down onto the streets below. I realized the ruby was a bad trade for the item I lost so I climbed down to retrieve it.

      James is now leaning over the roof asking what’s up and I explain what happened. He’s trying to spot where my fallen item is from above but can’t see it. There are leaves on the ground, suddenly I hear a faint humming sound. I feel through the leaves and crawl around until the sound gets louder and louder. I pick up the item from underneath some of the leaves and it’s glowing gold and humming loudly.

      It’s a golden ring with a skull that has fangs on it, with tiny rubies for eyes. I inspect it and it’s a vampiric ring, it has a life steal on attack function and is part of a set. The other set item is also a ring and I notice it’s in my inventory as well.

      James and I get moving and more bugs are swarming, now with a huge one that is spawning spawning the smaller bugs and keeping its distance from us. I threw some grenades at it which caused a lot of damage but didn’t kill it. This part felt like Helldivers 2/Starship Troopers.

      Death Roiland

      Jeff Roiland is on what appears to be a very tiny island with a massive tree growing on it. He’s got a rope wrapped around his entire body which is then connected to the trunk of the tree. Apparently he wanted to be in this position and he’s bossing around some guy on a speedboat.

      I get the dream knowledge that Jeff had wronged the speedboat guy many times and this was the last straw, his boat is tethered to the trunk of the tree and he begins to speed off very quickly. Jeff falls off of the tree-island and is now being dragged through the water. The speedboat guy intentionally keeps going near rocks and tries to swing the tree-island into other dangerous objects. Jeff apparently has the ability to levitate slightly but it requires concentration which he doesn't have in this scenario. He begins to get really messed up as he smashes into various objects.

      The scene is kind of disturbing me so I ‘turn it off’ like it was a screen or something. I am only experiencing blackness now but I can hear people talking about the aftermath. “Yeah he survived, but he will have to live in an iron lung for the rest of his life”

      * Probably from the Rick and Morty episode where the robots only purpose is to serve butter which I saw recently.
      ** My last dreams involved Linda and a washing machine as well but I can't find an IWL link for this.

      Updated 03-18-2024 at 08:06 PM by 106

      non-lucid , side notes
    8. The unbalanced soldier

      by , 03-18-2024 at 03:51 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      I've been pretty busy the past few days and lost some focus, recall hasn't been great! These dreams were from two days ago.

      The unbalanced soldier

      I’m on a large stage playing the role of a soldier for a movie. There is some sort of ceremony going on. There are soldiers on either side of me in a long row, we all take a seat at the same time into chairs that are right behind us. I rock back on my chair and am balancing on the back legs, I lose balance and fall backwards.

      The lead actor Tom Cruise comes over and helps me up. The movie then goes through a timelapse cutscene of Tom showing me how to be a better soldier. There’s short shots of me saluting incorrectly, then him showing me the proper salute, then both of us doing it right - etc. It felt like a comedy.

      Now I find myself seated in an audience, facing the same theater stage that I was on earlier. I push backwards to find that my chair isn’t bolted down and I again begin to balance on the back legs of the chair. I lose balance again and fall backwards. The man seated behind me begins helping me up, I notice it’s Arnold Schwarzenegger. I say to him “You know what, when I fall over it’s either you or Tom Cruise who seems to be helping me up.”

      Dead battery

      Tami and I are in a parking lot sitting in a car. Someone to the right of us is getting into their car and we notice it’s Linda. When we notice we call to her “Hey, Linda!” She nonchalantly pushes a large pizza box through our passenger window. She’s not saying much but we learn that her car battery is dead and needs a jump.

      Linda begins pushing her car which is in neutral so it lines up with the front of my car. I head to my trunk and grab some jumper cables out of the back, Linda already took the jumper cables out of her car and approaches me. We measure both of the cables, mine are thicker but slightly shorter than hers - I grab hers and put mine away.

      I notice that the rear of her car is lined up with the front of mine and that I would have to reposition my car so we were hood to hood. I also notice that we’re now parked on a large golf course. I head back over to my car but when I sit in the driver seat it almost feels like I sat into the side of a washing machine with my legs sticking out. It was nearly impossible to bring my feet in because the opening was too small, it felt so cramped.
    9. World of Weirdcraft

      by , 03-14-2024 at 04:00 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Yesterday I did some awareness meditations three times throughout the day at 15 minutes per session. I didn’t take enough notes down about my dreams last night this morning and now it’s way later in the day now so I’m missing a lot of details :\

      World of Weirdcraft

      There was some sort of stand up comedy show going on. The audience was a bunch of politicians dressed very formally. There aren’t any tables or seats, instead the audience is just gathered around talking to one another in a large room - not many people are even facing the guy performing his standup routine.

      I head out into the streets and I’m in a very World of Warcraft-like city. It feels like Stormwind but more peasant-centric.The experience and visuals are reality based but the style of everything is very much WoW.

      I’m now sitting cross-legged on the cobblestone streets, I am cutting up some sort of chemical/drug pill, the white crystalline inner contents are rapidly yellowing when exposed to the air. I think of what I should ask ChatGPT about the best way of preserving it would be.

      A mail-main-like figure is walking by* and asked “What time is it? I’m going to guess it’s about 11pm?” I respond that it’s only about 7 or 8pm. He was surprised and mumbled something about daylight savings as he continued on his route.

      Now I see an overview of the city I’m in, it’s on an ancient looking scroll. An old wrinkled, long nailed hand of a wizard is pointing over various locations on this map. He goes past the location I was on the street to the end of the city and says that “This is The Order of the Catalytic Converter”. I think to myself ‘that’s’ not very WoW-ish.. Then I re-consider my opinion when thinking that the dwarves or the gnomes could have easily come up with something like that.
      (IDK why I’ve been having these car related dreams lately)

      Then the hand goes way up north on the map-scroll showing a new zone for this ‘expansion’. He points to a night elf looking woman riding on a large black dragon which has glowing ember cracks all over its body revealing its heated interior.

      The wizard proclaims “This is the fat non-binary Dragon Queen!!” as the night-elf-looking character hops off the dragon to reveal a much larger midsection than is typical of WoW character models. I think to myself how blatantly pandering/insincere and virtue signaling Blizzard has become. He goes on about this character is the final boss for this expansion.

      Cans for Hawaii

      Tami and I are dropping off some cans at a recycling depot with the aim of going to Hawaii with the proceeds. We’re making an effort to grab four cans at a time with each hand for some reason. From our cans to the drop off point we make 10 trips back and forth, then celebrate that we dropped off 80 cans (It would've been 160 cans I realized after the dream). Surely enough for our trip to Hawaii!

      *He gave me very strong vibes of the "My man!" mail guy from Rick and Morty, an episode I saw again recently.

      Updated 03-14-2024 at 06:25 AM by 106

      non-lucid , side notes
    10. The tire warehouse

      by , 03-13-2024 at 04:03 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Last night I messed around with the EEG system I've been working on. I made some improvements in the software that I was excited to see the results of, but the electrodes on the Muse S are prone to noise and the signal was way off from ideal. It was overall a waste of a night, and since I was distracted on the EEG system my sleep suffered and my recall was zero.

      There's a lot of potential here and I've only just started, but I've been experimenting with so many different things recently that I'm going to take a break from it all and just focus on the basics for a bit. I think I'm going to limit myself to finishing ETWOLD and doing some of the practices there. Below are some dreams from two nights ago that I didn't get around to journaling.

      Elon’s tire warehouse

      I’m in a large warehouse that seems to be predominantly filled with tires, I’m feeling almost as if I work here. I ask a man if they have two tires for my car and affirms that they do. I wander around and find myself accidentally locked out of the warehouse. Beside the door that is locked is a very long and tall garage-like door, most of it is transparent. I look through and see that there is another identical garage door about 20 feet into the building and through the window on that one I can see many people walking around working, it’s where I was standing previously.

      I knock on the garage door to try to get someone’s attention, but nobody can hear me through both of the doors. Suddenly to the left of the door by a fence in a small garden-plot of dirt, a tire comes bouncing out and rolls right past me. I pivot around and watch it go away from the warehouse, which is the entire front yard of the PA house. It bounces down the steps and through the driveway and then I notice it’s heading towards an old man. I shout “Hey, look out!” and he notices it in time and hops out of the way.

      It ends up striking a tree that was behind him and rolls back to stop gently by his feet. I hop down the steps and grab it and bring it back to put it where it came from. When I approach the small garden by the warehouse I see that it’s just dirt with a bunch of tires in it. The tires that are laying down flat are unmoving, but all of the other tires that were in any other position were slowly moving to an upright position and seemingly ‘sprouting’ out of the earth. I guess this one was 'ripe' and popped out. I laid it down on its side to prevent it from jumping out again.

      I somehow managed to get back into the warehouse, I want to ask about the tires again. A woman passes me and I gain the dream knowledge that she’s a new employee here and that she’s a gamer, I want to get to know her more.

      Now I find myself in a back room in this warehouse, it’s kind of like the manager's office or something. I’m sitting in a chair with a large desk in front of me with Elon Musk (bleh) on the other side. Behind that is a long desk against a large window - the gamer girl is there, she’s doing some work for some college project. Maybe everyone is on a break right now in this warehouse.

      I ask Elon if a Tesla is worth getting. He responds with “No, I think you should take that money and instead split it with me and we can run off and be GamerLords together” (lol). We talk about some other topics.

      I then ask him what games he's currently playing, he says “I don’t play games, gaming is for pussies” The girl whips around to say something but I’m already mid sentence with “How are we supposed to run away and be GamerLords together if you aren’t even a gamer?”

      Freezing cat

      I find myself in a living room sitting on a couch with another couch across from me and one to the left as well, there’s maybe 5 or so people sitting around here. I look over to my left and see a very generic white looking refrigerator. I immediately know that my old cat S is in the freezer. I run over and open it and take him out instantly. He almost looks inflated, like his ears and head and body are just too large which I attribute to him being in the freezer. He’s extremely cold but he’s moving slowly and I feel sick just imagining how long he must’ve been in there, so many thoughts are going through my head - is it too late? Can he come back from this? I feel his nose and it’s just about frozen. I turn to everyone and say “S was in the freezer!?”, nobody even looked up from what they were doing.

      Updated 03-13-2024 at 04:07 AM by 106

      non-lucid , side notes
    11. Strange call in a new place

      by , 03-09-2024 at 06:12 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Last night I was testing out a wireless EEG headband and some REM detection software I made for it. I have it connected to my PC which then sends a sound to be played on my phone once REM is detected, unfortunately it unpaired with my PC before I got to REM sleep. My sleep was pretty poor since I was semi-aware of that process going on in the background.

      Dreams - 11:10pm - 10:09am (I can’t believe how long I slept)

      I’m in a house with Tami, it feels like it’s a new place we had just recently moved into. My phone rings, I pick it up and I can recognize it was DF by his voice. I wasn’t really interested in talking to him so when he said “Hello? Is this (my name)” I awkwardly responded “Uh.. No it’s not, you must have the wrong number!” We awkwardly end the call.

      A man enters the front door with five other guys. I assume this is the landlord with some guys to work on the house in some capacity. Tami is in the kitchen. I’m suddenly back on the phone with DF and we’re having an awkward conversation. He seemingly wants to get to know me better or to be friends outside of a professional setting but it’s just awkward. I can tell he’s watching tv in the background as we speak.

      A lull in the conversation comes up, we’re both silent. I’m suddenly wracking my brain for something to talk about, as if this was a really important meeting or interview or something. I let my mind go blank and tell myself if there’s something I want to talk about with him then it will come up, otherwise it won’t.

      I’m pacing as this is going on, I see Tami in the kitchen grabbing something out of the sink and one of the repair guys is standing right beside her, reaching to the top shelf for something in the cabinet. It dawned on me that these people came into the house without any notice, and the fact that this guy was going about what he was doing and seemingly crowding in on Tami's personal space really bothered me. I put the phone down for a sec and shouted across to the guy “Hey you, get out of here!” Tami turned and said “Oh, no it’s okay I’ve got him helping me! ” As the guy handed some spice he was grabbing from the top shelf to Tami. Now I feel kind of silly but also happy that he wasn’t bothering her, so I return to the call and resume pacing around.

      I admit to DF that earlier when he called that it was me. He says “Well, I did think it was you. It was your number, and it was your voice” (lol). I realize that there is some sort of bent up wire going around from the back of my head and close to my mouth - encircling my head. It was like electrical wire but the part right in front of my mouth the insulation was stripped showing bare copper. I felt like it may have been a mic.

      This whole dream felt like a gross fever dream, I woke up with an awful headache.

      Updated 03-09-2024 at 08:11 PM by 106

      side notes , non-lucid
    12. Calling off sick and twisted

      by , 03-07-2024 at 08:49 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Dreams - 10:54pm - 3:00am

      Calling off sick and twisted

      In this dream I have a forklift warehouse job and I really don’t want to go to work, I just feel tired and uninspired. I call off saying I’m taking a mental health day, I’m speaking with a lady. Suddenly I’m transported to her in person and we continue our conversation. I’m in an underground subway area that reminds me of the one in one of the Matrix movies, where the ‘conductor’ traffics rogue programs around or something. I have the feeling the train hasn’t shown up here in a long time. There are some office cubicles set up in the waiting area.

      The lady says she’s going to send me to a doctor that will give me some Reactine (An allergy medicine). She says “He’s good, because he won’t peel the glans in half”. I recoil from this statement and say something to the extent of “WTF are you talking about?” She shrugs it off and says that it’s just what some places do, some guys even request it and that even she’s done it for a patient before.

      She goes on to ask me if I’ve ever heard of some really extreme body modification topics before, and I tell her that I have but I’m not interested in it. (This was influenced by the dream I had the other day I’m sure.)

      During this conversation my surroundings are morphing from the subway-office to the PA living room with the call continuing again over the phone, I’m laying down on the couch. Katie is pacing around, excitedly and impatiently waiting for me to finish my conversation to get my input on something. Between her pacing and checking in on me and the weird conversation I’m having on the phone I get annoyed with the situation.

      Sole survivor

      I’m stranded on a distant planet, it’s a space mission gone wrong and I’m the sole survivor. It’s very dark and I’m enveloped by very fine black sand that is blowing against me constantly. The only illumination is from what might be my nearby spaceship and some other nearby equipment. The blowing sand against the dim lights could be mistaken as swarms of insects. There is a powerful laser-based machine beside me that can build things, it’s shaped like a cube. I don’t know how it works. I try turning it on and it shoots hundreds of lasers downwards from a grid on the top of the cube to the ground. I grab a piece of rusty metal on the ground and test out swinging it through the lasers, all of the rust is cleaned off by the lasers revealing chrome metal underneath.

      Lego world

      I end up on a planet where everything is shaped sort of like lego or minecraft, everything is very cube-y and pixelated. There are grassy areas with a light dusting of pixelated snow. Against a dirt wall I see a samurai looking statue which has a mempo mask on. I gain the dream knowledge that Jensen Huang, the CEO of NVIDIA owns and runs this planet. I find myself in a cavernous cube shaped room. There is a waist height two foot by two foot section of dirt removed from the whole perimeter of the room, it could be used as a dirt desk perhaps. There are symbols etched into the deeper part of this carved part of the wall and I have to touch them one by one sequentially around the room. As I do this the section is slowly closing downard, I realize my arm may eventually be crushed while trying to press one of the symbols if I’m not fast enough. An image of Jensen watching this event maniacally from above the scene appears in my mind.

      Dreams - 3:30am-6:32am

      Again at the PA house

      I feel like I’m in the H-Town area. I’m in a disgusting basement, it’s damp and moldy. There are people here troubleshooting something. There’s a water heater in front of me on it’s side, leaking onto the floor. Sue is there, RacheL is too and she appears similar to around the time I first met her.

      Going upstairs takes me to the livingroom of the PA house. It’s dark out and raining. I stare out the front window for a bit, nothing is happening. I’m alone and bored. I think to myself “I wish I could just jump forward past this boring part”.

      I notice “I MONSTER - Daydream In Blue” is playing. I have a conductors baton and I begin pretending I’m orchestrating the song. I stand by the fireplace facing both staircases and continue ‘conducting’. My dad comes in from the front door, makes his way to a seat near me and sits down. I carry on conducting.

      I’m not where this fits in but there was a man making chrome dental grills that spelled out “CHROOOOME”

      Updated 03-07-2024 at 08:55 PM by 106

    13. Fast food faux pas and penthouse drama

      by , 03-04-2024 at 08:17 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Dream 1: 12:00am - 4:30am

      Going through the drive-thru

      I’m going through a McDonalds drive-thru with some unknown friends. The driver pulls up enough that my window is lined up with the drive-thru window. I open the door and take the bags that are handed to me by a woman. I don’t know what I say to her but she misconstrues it as me asking for a free espresso which is part of some event going on. She looks at me like ‘really?’ and begins pouring an espresso, and then added whip cream to the top of it - all without taking her eyes off me or changing her expression.

      I feel bad about this for some reason and clumsily ask her “Uh, would you like anything?” (lol). She says she doesn’t drink coffee.

      To the party

      Some time passes and my friends and I arrive at our destination which is a fancy penthouse party. Everyone is dressed nicely and there are celebrities here. I get the vibe it’s some sort of award show after party, the atmosphere is relaxed and upbeat.

      I look at a man and I’m instantly transported to when he took his video that he submitted to compete in the event that led up to this party.

      It’s just him and one man filming him out in the wilderness, the ground and trees are covered in snow, it feels like it could be in Alaska. The man being filmed is a rapper, he has no shirt on and is only wearing shorts, his body is covered in tattoo’s and scarification tattoos. He has dark sclera contact lenses in and has heavy body modifications, his nostrils are removed and his upper lip is scarred and unusual. (This guy was influenced from a similar guy I’ve seen online recently)

      He’s rapping and the more I hear the more I don’t like him. The camera view changes - the view is now of the camera resting slightly sideways on the ground so that the snow on the ground takes up a lot of the view, and laying on the ground in front of it is the rapper's face. His eyes are wide open staring off to the sky as if he’s dead - his rapping continues over this shot. Very close to the camera are several rectangular pieces of his tattoo’d flesh that were removed, the blood lightly soaking into the top layer of the snow. The track title to the current song appeared in the bottom left hand corner of the screen, “redacted in on the loser”

      My presence is transported back into the party and now I see this man in a new light, he looks so different now in his dark suit. I turn my view and I see a Scottish looking man and again my presence goes to the video he produced. He was being recorded in a gymnasium, he was a top athlete in a rugby style game. Right before he began speaking I got the dream knowledge that he was the world's fastest speaker. Along with his accent and speed, I had no clue what he was saying. I think he had really long hair on the back of his calves too.

      I’m transported back to the event and there’s a commotion going on by the front door so I head over. Apparently an uninvited woman is trying to persuade her way in, the guy that was at the door asked me to watch it as he left to get someone. I begin having a conversation with the woman, she has black hair and vivid blue eyes and she’s absolutely beautiful. She’s saying that all I have to do is find a man named Eric here and he will vouch for her. I’m not really sure what the situation is and I know the other guy will come back soon so I just say let’s wait for him to come back and we’ll sort this out. We ended up joking around, laughing and flirting a lot.

      The suspension bridge

      I’m now hiking and crossing a suspension bridge up in some PNW mountains, as I cross it the vibrations dislodge some baseball sized rocks on the other side of the bridge which fall a great way down and just barely miss a man’s head. This really unsettles me.

      I performed several cycles of SSILD before drifting off to sleep again.

      Dream 2 5:00am - 8:00am

      To the cupcake place

      I'm out with some friends, we enter a 'cupcake restaurant' we're seated at a round table very close to the front door which I’m not too happy about. I head towards the side that is furthest from the door which has a bench but the seats are taken. I take the last seat which has my back right by the door. The tables and chairs are so low that it's really awkward to sit with my long limbs. The register is directly to my left and the hostess there sees me struggling. She apologizes for the awkward setup they have.

      While looking around at the place I absentmindedly grab some sort of cupcake off of my dish and take a bite. I look at my plate and it's full of partially eaten things by whoever was eating here last. The hostess notices this and apologizes profusely but also tries to blame me for sitting where I sat or something. All of these nuisances added up to too much, I stand up and say “you know what, I'm out” - I’m unusually aggravated.

      Hide and seek

      I leave the building and it's raining outside, I'm thinking about where I can go to get something to eat. I'm going back and forth on the ideas of fast food or somewhere nice.

      I'm now walking through a mall, the main walkway passes through a video game sort of store/section. A thin 17-ish year old guy screams at me "YOU!", I look at him and think that he may be autistic or something by the way his voice sounded and the way he looked. His eyes were bloodshot and his veins were standing out on his head.

      He quickly walked towards me and said something like "You took the last one!" And sort of punch/shoved me with both arms. He had so much more strength than he should have had for his size and I stumbled backwards.

      Behind him was what I considered to be his guardian, but he's also young - maybe 19. He's wearing a dark long sleeved shirt with his arms crossed, with a smirk on his face. This guy seems to make sure it’s at a distance but close enough to keep tabs on what’s going on.

      The angry one starts to come at me again and I try to calm him down, I slightly put my arms up with my palms facing him and quickly say "No no no, I didn't take anything!" in a friendly tone. He stops for a moment and looks at me wide-eyed like maybe he made a mistake, but then goes right back at it.

      I decided that the person he's with is possibly setting him on people like this and think it best to avoid the situation. So I start leaving this part of the mall and begin going down winding corridors. I know he's still following me so I sprint for a bit before resuming at a brisk walk.

      A woman is walking in my direction, when I try to walk to one side of the corridor she does the same thing. She's staring at me intently and unblinking - making sure that we're on a collision course. Similar to my last encounter, she has a man trailing her. Right before we collide I side- step to the right and get around her. Once we pass each other she’s immediately out of my mind, as if she was a car on the other side of a highway and now that we’ve left each other's vision we’re on our separate courses.

      I come up to a closed elevator door with someone standing facing it. I notice it's the kid I've been avoiding! I sneak up behind him and pull my fist back before becoming partially lucid. I think to myself 'what am I doing!?' I quietly back up and go around another corner, I end up in a store that must be unoccupied or something, the lights are all off and it's very dark.

      I go in to the right and back up against a small indented part in the wall and sit on the ground, suddenly exhausted. I see a long shadow of a figure from the light pouring in from the entrance on my left. The figure walks over directly to me and it's the kid again, it almost feels like playing a horror game and the killer found me. He’s cracking his knuckles.

      I slowly open my eyes a bit IWL and I'm in a very pleasant sleep paralysis. My whole body is really comfortable and nearly impossible to move, besides my eyes which are also very heavy. I had to choose between waking up and recording my dreams or potentially lucidly return to my dream. I decided on the former.

      Updated 03-04-2024 at 09:30 PM by 106

      non-lucid , memorable
    14. MICROWEED, mind and body merging

      by , 03-03-2024 at 11:09 PM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      I've had a cold the last several days which put a pause on my dream journaling. I’m still not 100% but I made a point to focus on recalling my dreams last night.

      Dream 1

      This was a long dream but I only remember fragments from it that are out of order. I’m sitting in some sort of lobby with a friend seated to my right. There is a door in front of me that goes to a restaurant. In front of the door is a table, there are two identical containers on this table. Their labels are bright and punchy with very large labels that say “MICROWEED”, the letters are made out of very tiny marijuana leaves.

      I announce “MICROWEED!” in a deep voice like I’m a movie voice over guy or something right as two ladies come through the door and block my view of the containers, they look right at me bewildered and confused why I’m saying this to them and then burst out laughing. I laugh too over the absurdity of the whole situation.

      Fragment 1

      I have some sort of metal rod like weapon or something in my right hand and a flint stone in my left. I’m sitting in a van in a seat that is facing the side sliding door which is open. In front of me is a curb and a walkway that goes to the front door of a house. There’s a ‘bodyguard’ at the door, he approaches me as I strike the tip of my metal rod a few times, sharpening it. He hastily approaches me and I approach him, we are simultaneously fighting and having a friendly conversation.

      I jab the rod for his throat which he dodges and grabs the rod and asks “Is that a piece of flint you’ve got there?” I confirm that it is as I struggle to get the rod out of his hands. We talk about the flint and he’s really interested in seeing it as we continue to have this ‘friendly fight’.

      Fragment 2

      I’m talking with either Tami or RacheL at my place. It’s nighttime and someone is approaching the house which is Tami or RacheL, whichever one I’m not speaking with.

      Fragment 3

      I’m in an upscale restaurant speaking with some friends. One of the people we were with stepped out and I grabbed his napkin, something about germs.

      Fragment 4

      I think I’m in the Pennsylvania house, in the end of the hall left room. There is a woman with me and I possess her, my body vanishes and I am controlling her body. I can feel her inside of my mind and she’s excited to see how I react to being in a different person’s body. I go over to the bathroom and look at myself in the mirror.

      I was in awe that it worked and how different I was. The body I’m in has strawberry blonde hair and my skin is very fair. It’s so weird looking into my eyes, it was looking into someone else’s eyes yet I was moving them, they were more of a pale blue compared to my own. I pulled my bangs back looking at a forehead that was unfamiliar. The whole experience was just mind blowing and I could feel the woman that I was sharing the body with laughing in our shared mind over feeling how crazy the experience was for me. I leaned forward and kissed the mirror, which I could feel caught my mind companion off guard.

      Fragment 5

      I see my head from a third person perspective. My hair seems to have been shaved off. I notice a small but deep scar on my right temple very close to my eye brow. I lightly massage it to feel if the bone underneath the skin had been deformed from whatever incident caused the scar. As I did this my right eye began twitching uncontrollably. I think ‘so that’s why my eye twitches all of the time!’ - even though it doesn’t IWL.
    15. FPS Gaming

      by , 02-29-2024 at 05:30 AM (Lucid-Wannabe's Dream Journal)
      Notable substances: 1g Glycine

      I didn't get to try the biphasic/segmented sleep schedule I was going to experiment with, going to save that for another time. In the past two days I tried taking the amino acid Glycine after reading up on how it helps with sleep and increases dreaming for some people. Yesterday I tried 3 grams before bed. I kept waking up in the night with long dreams in mind, but it made me so groggy I didn't have the energy to write them down and forgot them in the morning. It appears to make sleep deeper for me and makes my body heavier feeling than usual after waking up.

      So tonight I tried 1g. This dream was unusually cohesive/tied together for me and vivid, though I had to interrupt my sleep and wake up for the day after only 5 hours of sleep. I'm going to experiment with it more after seeing how kava kava does tonight.

      Dream 1

      I’m using a computer that has two video cards. They’re extended from USB risers from the motherboard and are sitting on my desk to the right and in front of my keyboard. I mess around with finding the best place to put them, their fans are loud and they’re so clunky.

      There’s a guy in the room with me and he recommends that I remove the power supply unit off my desk, which also was extended to fit there by the left of my keyboard. I lower the PSU onto the ground and put the video card in its place which is a better setup, but not ideal.

      The guy with me wants me to play a game that he’s really into, it’s sort of like CS:GO. I try it out, in the first round I spawn with my team of about five people. I don’t like my assault gun out of the gate so I look around on the grassy ground for another one. The guy with me says just go, don’t worry about it. But I spot a bolt action sniper rifle, I go to pick it up but the usual hotkey isn’t working so I try others until one works.

      As I travel onward I see a great valley with my teammates far ahead of me, already almost across to the other side where the enemy is. I climb up a hill near me and begin sniping at the enemies that are engaged with teammates on the other side of the map. I think about the netcode as I lead my shots.
      The polls are now closed-1.jpg

      I injured a few enemies and right as I took one down I’m being fired on from my right side at a very close range. I turn and take out my assault rifle and begin pre-firing as I lock onto the enemy. We both die at the exact same time. The camera pulls out to third person and slowly rotates around our bodies.

      Our team ended up losing, on the scoreboard I played 3rd for my team.

      Round 2 began and now we spawn in a smaller building. I go ahead and just barely see an enemy run into the room in front of me, he hides beside the door. I toss a grenade into the room right as he begins to set up a claymore by the door. The grenade goes off and I get a hit-marker, but no kill. I go into the room and finish that guy off.

      In quick succession I run into a few of the other enemies and take them out. The last one runs by me, he has no shirt on and has a really hairy back. He’s armed with nothing but a crowbar, I think to myself that he’s probably trolling this match. He hides in a locker and shuts the door behind himself.
      The polls are now closed-2.jpg
      Okay so he wasn't quite this hairy!

      After chasing him around a bit I eventually take him down and the match is over. The score screen shows me in first place with 5 kills and all of my teammates have 0. The person that was in the room with me must’ve ran out for a sec as they’re not there, I wait for a moment and they show back up. I show them the score screen and he says “daaaamn!”

      He proceeds to show me that the better you do the better of a reward you get at the end of each day. You’re rewarded with a different color hospital bracelet, depending on how well you do. He then explains that they allow you to enter certain e-sport areas in the game. Most of them are sort of training videos with tips and tricks from famous e-sport players.
      non-lucid , memorable , side notes
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