Brainy Vapours

Some Fragments:

My ex keeps putting my bed covers over top of his BBQ, covering the meat he is cooking there. I keep telling him to stop, but he doesn't, saying that he likes the smokey flavour he gets when he uses my bed covers as a lid

Owen is visiting and we're trying to figure out what would be the best job for him. I am looking in his online profile to get some ideas, but I feel like I'm trespassing or snooping.

My son is sat at a large table with all kinds of fruit and veg on it. We are testing each to find out which he likes.

Flies in my Nose!

I have a sickness of the eyes and I can't seem to focus properly. Blurry, I go up to the doctor and they tell me it will be expelled soon. I sit down in a dentist like chair, or rather, I lay back, as they turn on a big overhead light. I ask them what it means that 'it will be expelled soon' and they tell me that 'it' is an insect that is in my nasal cavity. Sure enough, one tiny fly like creature comes out of my nose in a stream of liquid, then another. I am told that this happened because of the cubed tobacco I have been eating. I think of where I got it, and I see Teddy from Gray's anatomy eating it too. I picked up the habit from being around her, I rationalize.
The doctors collect the flies to send to pathology.

There's a party at my Grandparent's house, and I'm sat at a table with a few other girls out on the lawn, facing the ocean. One of the girls is getting married soon (shock and surprise, this dream sign did not shake me), and I tell her I have some advice for her as I got married recently (I didn't). I go looking in the house for my notebook (actually the one I was looking for looks just like my dream journal). I find my cousin in the kitchen, she's really drunk and irrate. I see that she's trying to make a small plate of nacho chips for the ladies, but for some reason she's put a dollop of whipped cream on the top. In her drunken state, she's accidently squished that dollop under her chin. The remnants of the whipped cream are still hanging there, off her chin. She's ranting about something, now she seems more upset and sad. I tell her she should slow her drinking down as we will be going all night, and she needs to pace herself.
I go back to the table to impart my wisdom upon the girls and the dream ends.

There is a chance that I am pregnant, so my Mom brings out a bunch of tests for me to take. I look at the tests and I'm a bit doubtful, because the tests are so old looking. I take one and it's negative, but I really question it's effectiveness after I notice it expired in 1966. I look at the other ones, and notice another one expired in the 80s. I point this out to my Mom and she looks frustrated. I guess she decides to take me to a doctor or something because we're in the car and driving down a very familiar highway past an old building I used to always look at as a child.

As we are zooming past, I see someone I think my Mom knows, hitchhiking along the side of the road. He is dressed kind of funny, but I couldn't get a close enough look. I tell my Mom to maybe stop and go back, as her friend was looking for a ride. She looks surprised and says she didn't see anyone. We go back and pick him up, and it turns out to be Jack Sparrow from the Pirates of The Caribbean. He is very grateful for the lift, and starts spreading out all different forms of illegal drugs in front of me to pick from in a form of payment for the ride. I explain to him that I can't take any because of the possible pregnancy and the dream ends with him looking at me rather confused.

The last two nights have both brought dreams of cheaters and cheating again. I can definitely chalk up "Cheating" as a dream sign, though I really wish it wasn't. I don't like having these dreams at all.

Dream 1

I find out that my Man is with some other woman, and that he is spending most of his free time with her. He refuses to take proper precautions in his "dealings" with her, and is overall being really hurtful and selfish, proclaiming that he will continue on doing just whatever the hell he wants with her, neglecting me and the kids in the process. I am overwhelmed and find it hard to cope with taking care of the kids. My 4 year old son ends up playing in a muddy field while I am forced to listen to my Man's groupies, who are all clustered on a bright red fire engine, go and on about how hot he is. He makes me watch a short trailer type movie about him and his new girl. I just ache with the hurt. I tell him how he's heartless and put me at risk.
I am then scolded by some social services type of woman for the lack of care I am giving my son.

Dream 2

An old instructor of mine has come into town after many years (Actually this is based in reality, this person from my past recently contacted me on facebook). He taught me when I was much younger. He is still married to the same woman, whom I don't know so well a part from knowing she is shy and quiet. I'm at my Mom's house, upstairs in her old bedroom before the renovations she did a few years back. I'm just laying around reading a book. He comes into the bedroom and flops on the bed beside me, spewing his usual witty and entertaining banter. After a long time talking, he suddenly makes a pass at me, grabbing me really inappropriately. I am totally confused, but somehow not surprised.

Flash forward to another woman, who, in my dream, looks exactly like Kim Raver from Gray's Anatomy, that he used to teach as well. I know that she used to have a huge crush on him, and I become aware that she feels very competitive towards me, vying for his attentions. She is acting very slutty and suggestive around him. She is sitting with her legs spread eagle, drawing attention to the "damage" to her jeans that apparently my instructor and I were responsible for "all those years ago". She is pleased with herself that she can still fit into the jeans, but I wonder how the hell she can be seen in public with them and not be thrown in jail for indecent exposure. All the areas that are supposed to be covered are very visible through big gaping holes. I notice my instructor is enjoying the show, and I wonder about his wife and where she is.

Some questionable stuff happens against the outside of an old shack, then the dream ends.

I am in some sort of camp cabin type house, on some endowment kind of lands. I get the feeling it’s a college or university, and it’s definitely in Canada. There are a lot of trees. It’s night time, and with me are a gathering of about 4 other people. We’re discussing religion, a certain type of Wicca/Pagan belief that involves a deity that appears masked and shrouded in many layers of draped cloth. She is said to come to certain devotees late in the night. After discussing this for a little while, we move on to talking about prophets. As the others are talking about some random prophet, “THE Prophet” comes to me. The others don’t seem to notice, they kind of fade into the scene, still there, but not as noticeable. The Prophet is a man, dressed in draped cloth, smiling down at me in an absolutely radiant way. The feeling that he exudes is pure love and joy. He reaches out and takes my hands, holds them gently, Even though there is a sense that he has no hands. He tells me how happy he is to have me join them. This moment seems to stretch out for a time, then it fades and the scene with the others comes back into focus. I tell them about my experience and they are all in awe. The meeting ends and we all leave. I hope that someone will walk home with me, as it’s dark and I don’t feel safe, but they all scatter in different directions before I can ask anyone.

Flash forward a bit into the future to a completely different climate, one that is warm and somewhat tropical in feeling. There are huts scattered around the landscape. They look like a futuristic version of a teepee. Someone has left the daily food ration outside the hut in a special hammock kind of thing. I go to collect it. They are gourds, and I am familiar enough with them to know that they are spiced and very tasty. I notice a woman slips by the hammock and steals some of the gourds, then hurries away. This upsets me, but I know there is nothing I can do about it, so I take the rest into the hut.

There are seating places on the floor of the hut where the residents can sit around in a circle facing each other. In my place there is a gift box, very organic looking. I pick it up and unwrap it very carefully, taking my time and enjoying the process. I can’t remember all of the items that were in there, but there was a roll of cloth with detailed instructions on how and why to wear it. It said something like “Drape this cloth over your body to cover as much flesh as you can, as your body is precious, and should be protected”. There were also a few ornate ear rings and some semi precious stones.

We’re eating the spiced gourds now, and suddenly we’re interrupted by a visit from the prophet and his “Speaker”. The Speaker is draped in so many layers (including all around the face) that it’s very difficult to tell if it’s a male or a female. S/he begins to speak and I look at her/him as s/he does. I am scolded and told to look either at the Prophet, or at the ground. We are instructed in quite a few things which I don’t remember, but I do remember something to the effect of being told we should not eat meat for some critical reason. We are allowed to eat grains (such as rice) and vegetables like the gourds we are eating now.
I realize that all the others in the hut with me are also new to this way of life, and the dream ends.

Dream
Non Dream

I'm in a checkout line, trying to pay for my purchases, which consist of a bottle of expensive perfume, 3 packages of menthol cigarettes that I impulsively pick up, - Strange as I don't smoke, in fact I am very anti smoking - and something else of importance that I can't remember - I wish I could remember what this item was, I have a feeling it was important -. I have to split the tender, some cash and some on debit card. The man behind me is obviously irritated that it's taking so long for me to get it over with. After I am through the check out, the cashier pulls me aside and tells me in hushed tones that I should be wary of that man who was waiting to pay. She says that he was looking at my purchases in a certain way and she's fairly sure he will try to steal them.

My man is waiting for me at the other side of the checkout and we leave, walking out of the store into this kind of desolate landscape. The only thing visible is an old barn up ahead. We look back and that man is following us. We try to hurry without looking like we're afraid. The man reaches the barn before us and comes out armed with some sort of weapon, a pitch fork I think. He demands we give him the items I bought. I hand them over, feeling very irritated.

My friend Marianne and I are in a tiny bathroom trying to get ready to go out. The bathroom is very crowded and steamy, cramped with all kinds of products crowding all the surfaces, and clothes hanging all over the place. Marianne has come into the bathroom rather suddenly, which makes me sort of panic because I was in the process of stealing her shampoo to use on my hair, as I have countless times before, hoping she wouldn't notice. I fake that I was "just looking at it" and look at the other products. She helps me chose one from the other products that best suits my hair type, from the products in the cabinet mirror. After I put the shampoo in my wet hair, she gives me a tight hug from behind, and I notice she smells my hair. I think this is sweet, but a bit strange.

We are just about ready to go when she disappears for a second to call down to the pub to see what the drink and dinner specials are, she comes back and seems pleased with what she found out. She tells me to hurry and finish up so we can beat the crowd. I hurriedly climb back into the shower with my robe on, and the water is running, so my robe gets soaked. It's heavy and cumbersome so I struggle with it to get it off. I start dancing around in the shower, singing to myself, then Marianne comes back in again and is talking to me. She's talking about gas explosions and how scary they are while she tries to free the toilet area of its clutter. There are stacks of magazines under it and stuff all around it. She says that when the heater starts to shoot steam it's your warning to run like hell, because the gas explosion is imminent at that point. While she is de-cluttering she accidently rips the toilet off the wall. I notice that it's olive green, 70's style. We both watch in horror as she notices she's ended up putting her hands in the nasty part of the toilet, under the rim.

Dream
Non Dream


Dream 1 - Grey's Anatomy Cast Moving my Furniture

Some guys are moving some furniture for me. Included are my Partner, my Brother In Law, and Alex Karev from Grey's Anatomy. The house we are in in a two level version of an old beach house my Grandparents used to live in. After a while, they come downstairs looking exhausted and frustrated. Apparently there was a problem. Lexie from Grey's appears and gives me the low down on the situation. While they were moving furniture around my baby son's bedroom, a window was broken. They are all very concerned that my son will suffer from too many cold drafts of air.

Too much time in Germany is to blame for that brainwave I think! LOL

Work stops and there is pizza for all the hard working helpers, but I realize I must bring a table down from upstairs so that people can eat it. I can't do it alone, but no one offers to help because they are all so tired. My Brother In Law seems to be especially tired - he begins to snore loudly on the couch next to me. I chide him for it and he smiles at me before quickly passing out again. Suddenly I feel really tired too, like I can't move, even though I did nothing. I know that the others all want me to go get the table, but we all pass out instead.

Dream 2 - Cheater Theatre

I think it's rather strange that "cheating" seems to be a reoccurring thread through out my dreams. Perhaps it is a dream sign, reflecting in inner fear.

A group of people are watching my closely to see what I will do, if I will cheat on my man with this random guy that looks a bit like Tom Cruise. I feel pressured. I am not interested in cheating, but for some reason I agree to. There is a room separated by a curtain that we go into. Flash forward to after the "event", there is a large African American man telling me that I've got game, and he has respect for me. I barely acknowledge the comment. Flash forward to me putting on some makeup with the same people watching me intently. The onlookers are waiting with baited breath, and when I put on a certain shade of eyeshadow they go mental, telling me that the colour is perfect for me. It's really odd as they are all shouting and cheering over it. They offer me a really over the top curly blond wig to complete the look.

dream
nondream

I'm in a flat with my cousin. We live there together with my son. It's fairly small but bright and open plan. I come up with a plan to redecorate it, removing some cheesy stickers that are on the wall. The stickers are very 80s looking, music notes and bars in a wave sort of pattern that goes up and along the wall. My plan in to paint the wall with the design I've seen on one of the tee shirts that my cousin wears, a brown one with yellow script writing that says "Retro". My cousin agrees but wonders how we will do it, concerned that it will be a difficult project.

Flash forward to the bathroom, I am giving my son a quick shower. He is playing around with the water, then gets a hold of the shower hose and then lets it go. Suddenly the water is on full blast and the hose is going mental, spraying everywhere. At first my son laughs hysterically, but not for long. The water has turned hot (I get the horrible impression that I turned it up???) and now it's burning him and he's screaming. I can't get to him at first and there is panic as all I can do is watch in horror.

After I get the hose to stop spraying I poor some cool water on my poor kid's skin, which is red and angry. There is an imprint of the bathmat from the bottom of the tub burnt into his skin. I wrap him in cool towels and plan to go to the hospital.

We end up at this strange cafeteria kind of place full of those fold out tables and chairs. I get the impression that there will be a wedding or something going on here (wedding is a dream sign of mine, I wish it triggered a RC, but nope) sometime soon. There are some nervous parents of the bride or groom milling around, one woman approaches me while I am trying to put my poor kid to bed (under a table!). She asks me if she can help me. I suddenly get a glimpse of some laundry hanging on a wire in a field and the dream ends.

This week has been pretty boring for dreams. Nothing but a mess of fragments.

- A body out lined in chalk
- My sister wanted me to send money on paypal to some random place because her payment failed
- Big girl sitting on a glacier
- Houses built on stilts in a kind of swamp area, a feeling that it was somewhere in the southeast region on Asia
- Me about 8 months pregnant (with a girl - I have boys) sitting in a jacuzzi talking about the baby, immediately followed by images of a steaming (bubbly from the oven) cherry pie. Looking over I notice a girl that was there without her boyfriend, which I find odd.

I woke up today at 4:30am and took my G+C combo - 8mg+235mg respectively at around 5am. Went back to bed after eating a slice of cheese.

I have to consider this attempt a failure because though it felt somewhat promising, my punk kids woke up at around 5:30ish and disturbed the whole thing, so I couldn't continue (shakes a fist at said kids). I had to wake up then, and man was it a strange feeling to be awake on that stuff.

Exhausted, at around 11:30am I managed to steal a 2 hour nap while the kids slept. I tried a sort of WILD thing, trying to remain conscious with "1 I am dreaming.. 2 I am dreaming" as sleep came, but I found I was going in and out of remembering which number I was at. That happened about 3 times.
Then, in my dream, which was very very sexual in feeling, I gained some slight lucidity just before and during a really intense climax. I felt I had the choice to be lucid or go along with the dream at the time. I chose to be lucid, but go along with it. Thinking back on it now it was really strange as it wasn't a sexual scene, nor sexual things happening, but just the feeling was there.

After the climax I sort of lost my lucidity and dreamed a little while longer before waking up. So I guess it was a half success, with a pretty nice side benefit included!

Last night's dream was filled with feelings of guilt and exasperation

I was at some random guy's house, helping him host a house party because he was sick. It should be mentioned that 'I' was not me - I was female but in another body it seemed.

The whole party consisted of me fetching and carrying for the host, cleaning up all of the bottles and dirty clothes (?) left around by guests, and feeling incredibly guilty knowing that I was helping this guy cheat on his girlfriend, who came home early in the end of the dream.

A bit of a masochistic dream, me thinks

I tried some Choline last night to see if it would help with vividness and recall

I had a crazy night of dreams, but unfortunately I can't remember much. What I do remember are two incredibly vivid images/experiences; the first was Nelsan Ellis as his character (Lafayette Reynolds) on Trueblood fitting me with some false eyelashes... ()

The second image was very real and very strange. I remember seeing a brown lounge chair to my right. It was covered in a kind of microfraser fabric and it had no arm rests. I notice that it's starting to move in a very unusual way, almost like it's alive. It quickly ramps up to very frightening movements similar to what an alligator would do with it's jaws. It's so real and violent, and I think I am on the edge of becoming lucid because I just know this can't be real, and then the emotion of all of it wakes me up.

... *sigh* ... So close

Me and the husband, (which happens to be The Rock)
... are in a large hotel that looks like one I stayed in in Miami once. We're in a room on the second floor. For what feels like hours, we run around the hotel, through stairwells and elevators, up and down hallways... All in an effort to escape the "bad men" that are chasing us. It's difficult because The Rock seems to have injured his leg somehow.

I really hate those kind of dreams... they are so boring and exhausting

Fragment 1 - Scrooge

I'm working for a very grouchy old man, rather like Scrooge I guess you could say, in some sort of office. He has two female assistants, one of them thinks she's completely indispensable to him. I happen to know that he could care less about the work she does. I don't know much about the other assistant, she seems to keep to herself.
I am busy and stressed, trying to get the important copying and paperwork done.

Flooding Farmland and the Cooking Contest

I was on what I knew to be our farm land, although it looked more like a beautiful park, with a lake that covered 2 sides of it. We, my family and I, were sitting eating a picnic lunch at the water's edge. I remember asking my Mother what she thought of the "farm" land and what she thought I should farm. I don't remember her response.

Upon turning to watching the water and daydream, I noticed it was actually rising fairly fast. I warned my family and we all had to scramble to pack up the picnic.

Flash forward to some sort of strange televised cooking contest that has now become visible further down my land. I realize I am involved in the contest and I become angry with my husband that he didn't order me the bright orange shirt and baseball cap that the others are wearing in the contest. It seems I need these items to compete. After searching around a bit, I find a hat in a pile of random stuffs near some random guys whom are loitering there. They look at me suspiciously. I snatch it up and head to my station. I try to begin cooking at my station and then realize that I have no food items to cook with! I guess I have a house on the farm land, because I run to it to see what I can scrounge together. I manage to find some frozen schnitzels that I can fry, and some broccoli and potato flakes which can be made into mashed potatoes.

Flash forward to the result - a judge telling me that it was just average and not at all inspiring. I don't really care - I am just very relieved it's over.