sedrick

Allan Rickman played a vampire on a television show.

I was at my friends house at night, scaring little kids by telling the stories about Slender Man and locking them up in cages.

I was at a tech conference. Apple was revealing a new computer that could talk interactively with you. Just for fun, they decided to let the computer give a speech that it had come up with on its own. They set it up on a podium. It talked about how much better it was than other competing brands' computers. Afterwards, the crowd went wild, gave it a standing ovation and voted it the best computer of the year.

There was a boarding house in Paris, France. It was a very cute apartment and was very nicely decorated. And it was like right next to the Eiffel Tower. My mother was the owner of the boarding house, and I was part of the housekeeping team. My job was to go into all the different rooms and spray some chemical on the beds. Then in my spare time I went out and took photos of the Eiffel Tower.

I was cleaning the beds one day when I went into a room and found my mother talking to this young french lady. As I sprayed the bed, I listened in on their conversation. The french girl was telling my mother about a new exercise technique that she had invented. It involved taking the fat on your belly between two fingers and pinching it really hard for about half an hour. My mother was quite taken with this technique, and said she would give it a try. Then the girl told my mother that she had once had a record high of 520 dreams in a single night. Obviously my mind was blown and I thought to myself, "Wow, she must be an amazingly talented lucid dreamer! I wish I could do that!" I failed to do a reality check.

Then there was something about Jake the dog from Adventure Time going to an antique store. I was also for sale in the antique store, standing behind glass. This girl I like was looking at me, and coming up really close to the glass. Then I saw this huge monster walking around the store. It looked like an enormous hairy lemon with legs. These little girls thought it was funny, and ran around between his legs. Their hair tickled his underside and it angered him, so he grew these twig-like, flaky hairs out of the top of his head. They curved around over his body, and punctured his underside and grew back into his skin. So he was surrounded by this thick, woody shield that leaved only his two legs exposed. The girls couldn't tickle him anymore.

Then I was Oliver Twist, and I was being chased by Fagin through London. He eventually got worn out and laid down on a park bench and fell asleep. I went up slowly to him. He had a pet monkey that was sitting on his shoulder. I fed it some bubble gum.

Then I got back to my house. It was very late. My mother came up to me and said, "Hey, I let Fagin into the house". And I was obviously utterly shocked and outraged. But she assured me he wouldn't do anything, and that he was fast asleep. Then I asked my mom, "Why aren't you in bed?" And she said, "What? Good grief, I never sleep. I thought you knew that."

I saw myself in a mirror. My face looked basically the same, but the skin of my face was really really dry and peelly, and the skin of my face was flaking off and blowing away.

I was walking around downtown Chicago. There was this huge canvas tent that took up an entire city block. It was several stories tall and had different floors inside it. I stepped inside.

It was like this huge antique store with lots of fancy, expensive stuff. One dealer came up to me, and he was like, "Check out this awesome telescope I've got for sale!" I checked it out. "Look at how easy it is to fold up! I mean, look at how smoothly all the little wheels work!" He showed me all the bells and whistles, but I was unimpressed, so I moved on.

I went up to like the middle story of the tent. There were lots of naked women sitting around. I was totally unprepared for that, and it made me really embarrassed. (You bet.) They were apparently dancers in a musical that was happening in a playhouse across the street, and they were getting into their costumes. One lady with nothing on below the waist came up to me and took me by the arm. Apparently, part of her outfit were these flesh-toned pantyhose with pubic hair glued to the genital area, and it had gone missing. (Supposedly it was to make her appear to be naked without actually having to BE naked.) She wanted me to find them for her, but I couldn't.

Then all the performers cleared out, except for about three people. One in particular I noticed. She was sitting on the floor, listening to one of the other two tell a story. It was apparently a funny story, and she laughed a lot and seemed to enjoy herself.

I was standing out in this big nature reserve by myself. There were lots pine trees and tall grass. Suddenly, this red car pulled up and a lady got out. She went over to a little hole in the ground, and she motioned for me to come nearer. She stuck her arm down into the hole and pulled out this huge angry venomous snake. She handed it to me and told me to put it in the back seat of her car. As I carried it over to her car, it kept trying to bite my thumb. I just tossed it into the back seat through the window. She continued to hand me snakes. We did this for a long time.

Then she put me in her car and drove me to my friend's house. In their sun room, she had a huge metal tank filled with snakes. Some had fur and were matted with blood. They were all alive and squirming around. There were hundreds of them. It was gross. She would hand me a snake's head, then she would grab its body and pull as hard as she could. The snake would stretch and its back would break and finally its head would rip off. She would then use their skins to make shoe leather.

I was in this huge auditorium attending a speech. An illusionist was onstage giving instructions on how to make a liquid that would turn the person who drunk it into a zombie. All the ingredients an utensils were laid out on a table in front of me, and I was following his instructions. Not many people were attending the class, and after a while, mostly everyone left. Eventually, so did I.