stevendoig

Oh dear...

(non lucid)

So I'm sitting on a potty in a public toilet in a wee village called Edzell. I do a number two (or jobby) but there is an issue (don't know what now) I wait for the attendant. He comes in. He's a wee man in his fifties, is wearing a blue boiler suit and is a bit rough looking. He tells me he'll get round to me soon. He moves to the left of me, I turn and see him mucking aboot with some purple hand cleaner and a bunch of flowers. Theres a gap and then I'm carrying my jobby laden potty through a churchyard. There is what is apparently a toilet in the corner. However, it was a skip. It had wee letterbox holes around the top of it. Theres a bench to the right. A lad I know from years ago is sitting there with a pair of comedy glasses. I start singing -
'I'm going to put my jobby in the toilet'...
My friend looks at me, he's not happy, this is not the place for fun. I attempt to pour the jobby from the potty into the wee holes. However (I'm very sorry...) its very viscous and it takes many attempts to get it to slide out. However, eventually I succeed and my hands are clean.....

Also a fragment about sticking my hand in my ear and pulling out a huge solid piece of earwax. It was about two inches long. I showed it to someone, they seemed vaguely interested.