Xanous' Dream Journal

#1 Rainn Wilson's Comedy Act
I am in some darkened theater and Rainn Wilson (Dwight Schrute)is on stage doing stand-up comedy. My wife is next to me and her sister is next to her. Rainn has some sort of drum that look like a metal coffee can in a square box on a stand. He stands in front of it and says something about how he's Jewish. We all laugh at lot a his jokes. Somehow I am able to reach out and pat the drum a few times.

Then he randomly starts playing violin with a full orchestra behind him. People take this as the end of his act and start leaving in mass numbers. My wife, her sister and I decide to stay. I think the music sounds amazing and relaxing. My wife and her sister get up to get a closer seat since there are some open now. My wife wants me to follow but I realize that for some crazy reason I have and erection. I wave her on and tell her I'll be there in a minute. I visually follow her with my eyes and get a good idea where they are sitting. I try to understand why I have an erection but am in now way aroused. Then I think this happens a lot during dreaming.

I briefly wake up notice that yes I do have an erection and renter the dream non lucid. I have some thoughts about the music. Maybe that's his way of getting everyone to randomly get bored and thus ending the show in some strange dryly humors way. Or maybe he doesn't want people to linger and greet him backstage. That must be it.

I am back in the same seat and every is as if I had not woke up at all. (Perhaps I didn't really wake up?)Now I have some sort of blanket or cloak that I hold in front of me. As I walk it wraps around me and I feel secure and cozy. I find my wife and her sister almost up to the front and I sit next to them still enjoying the music. At the point more and more people start leaving. The music ends and Rainn says something. Then, "If you linger that means you a close pals with Dwight. You'll be just like him." I look over and my wife and her sister are gone. Some blonde is walking past looking displeased. Not wanting to be like Dwight, I say to her, "That's it I'm out."

I follow massive amounts of people out of the exits. The line just to get out seems impossibly long. For some reason, perhaps out of habit, I pat my pockets noticing my wallet, keys, and cellphone are missing. I begin to panic thinking it must have fallen out some place. There is some small table next to wall with my stuff. I snatch it up and check the contents of my wallet. My cards are missing along with my driver's license and Social Security card. I panic. My dad passes by and asks what's wrong. I tell him and he walks away uninterested. I want call my wife now to get the numbers off her cards to alert the bank and credit card company. I fiddle with the phone and place find it very difficult to place a call. One I finally hit send it disconnects immediately.

I realize I had wondered into the parking lot. I just wonder around looking for my wife or the car while trying to place a call. I feel helpless and actually begin to cry of the whole situation. I feel tears rolls down my cheeks as I become aware of other pedestrians and vehicles passing by me. I try to hide the fact that I am crying but eventual decide I don't care. I keep trying to call my wife and I become very pissed that my phone just wont work right. I begin to remember something and think, "This happens a lot in dreams." For some reason I think about how easy it is for my father in law to use his phone. Then, That's it I just need a new phone.

I put the phone away and now I am in some Christmas shop full of Dr. Sues looking stuff. I think this must be some sort of "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" replica. I figure this would be a likely place to find my wife. I look around some narrow zigzag hallway decorated with lights and garland but only see strange faces. They are all women and I get the feeling like I should not be in there. Like maybe I wondered into the women's restroom. I wake up.

I use MILD and visualize an OBE with mantra

#2 Spiderman?
I wake from some NLD that I can't recall and am able to DEILD. Maybe I am just waking to REMatonia or SP. I feel tingles in my arms and legs but no vibrations. This time I really expected vibrations. I incorrectly visualized my OBE. I'll have to keep that in mind. I wake for awhile and become very bored. I don't think to induce the vibrations and I start visualizing wondering the house hoping to exit my body that way. I start with walking along the bedroom wall noticing the fell of it with both hand. I press my body to it almost hugging it.

Suddenly I am crawling up a wall that looks like the semi-gloss green of the bathroom and become lucid but on a lower level than usual. Now I slide down the wall as I think about gravity. I shift my thinking and think that gravity is wherever I choose. I tell myself that gravity is in the wall. I now get a grip and crawl to the ceiling. Again I chose gravity to be on the ceiling and I crawl to that. I begin to enjoy my control of gravity and crawl all over the small empty room that I am in without much effort.

Now I realize I have an erection again and...I'm embarrassed to say... I start humping the wall in various places. My lucidity begins to slip and I lose all self control. I wake up before too much happens.

#3 Xanous Knows Baseball
I am on a professional baseball field. I see my name on some batting roster and I head to the dugout. I laugh that my name actually reads "Xanous". I do a double take and notice that the spelling has morphed into a type of l33t speak but still clearly says "Xanous". I don't catch this and think, They must have got confused somehow and used my online name. I actually like it and decide to just go with it.

I see Tonya from work in the dugout and I ask her name. She says her name is Coraline and she is from Guatemala.
For whatever reason I blurt out, "GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAL!"
I laugh at my mistake. "Oops. No that's soccer. We are playing baseball... HOOOOOOOOMERUN!"
She laughs and tells me how to say home-run in Spanish. I slowly repeat the word several times and she corrects me until i get it right. I can't remember what it was now but it was some long complicated word. I wake up.

#4 Off-Roading
I am sitting on a large 4-wheeler waiting of some black truck with huge off road tires to pass me. The sky is over cast and there is a large mud puddle on the trail. Somehow the driver of the truck communicates to me that they are waiting for me to lead them. I smile and motion them to follow. I say something like, "Try to keep up." with a cocky grin on my face.

I drive thru the mud and down the trail then I take a turn up an impossibly steep hill. I feel the 4-Wheeler struggle and throw mud as I open the throttle but I make it. At the top there is a shear grassy drop off. Beyond looks like something out of Skyrim but less rocky. I follow the narrow ridge but now I am being pulled along by a push mower. A long line of pine sapling get mowed down then I reach a steep muddy hill going down and ride down. At the bottom I think I should have done that on the 4-wheeler. Now I am on the 4-wheeler instead.

There is a camp site near some building that is basically a wall on the side of a dirt cliff. I gather up my stuff and load the 4-wheeler to leave. There are two guys coming out of the building. I think they must be the ones that were in the truck. They ask if this is how I go mountain climbing. I say, "No there's no rocks. I like to rock climb like that." I point to a poster tacked to a tree of a man rock climbing. the two men start talking to a 3rd unknown person. I get the feeling that they two guys are a gay couple. I look them over and they look too... pretty to be out in the woods. The more feminine man on the right says something about going to "The Wretched Festival." Is that a gay thing? Now they have their arms around each other. I begin to feel perturbed by it so I drive off without a word. I wake up.