Tell Me About Sex

[Oneironaught]

I think if two people are in love it doesn't matter whether they have official documentation or official vows themselves. All the vows they need they have made together, in their hearts. If - to go through this yet again - marriage means nothing to you then you don't deserve marriage. It's not really all that difficult to understand. And when did I say that love can't occur without a ring, a piece of paper and a public ceremony? Never, actually. What I did say is that you (anyone) shouldn't lie to someone else and pretend that it does matter to you if it doesn't. If marriage is such a "oh, no, my life is ruined; I think I'll keep on doing the same selfish stuff I always do" event then why the hell should those with that opinion be allowed to water it down and ruin its importance for the rest of us? That said I don't believe true love exists. But you get what I'm saying. You get what you give. If you don't believe in love then you are destined to be loveless. Enjoy your wallow in self pity. And enjoy lying to others (and yourself). Not to be nasty but, Actually yeah, I need more nasty. How the hell can you talk about its greatness having failed twice and never experienced it!? Oh, imagine that: another wise guy So, because I've been cheated on and fucked over I'm not allowed have a sense of value. I can't appreciate the institution of marriage simply because I've never been married? You people are making less and less sense. And that's a real accomplishment, even for this group. Frankly, I'm sick of discussing grown-up stuff with a bunch of selfish brats children with little to no sense of perspective and what's really important in life. Like I said, if you feel that you aren't willing or suited to make a real commitment to someone else then don't. But don't go trashing marriage because you're too immature to understand what REAL love is really all about. Or, more specifically, what marriage is all about.

[GestaltAlteration]

Frankly, I'm sick of discussing grown-up stuff with a bunch of selfish brats children with little to no sense of perspective and what's really important in life. Not that I'm one to talk but... I'm glad to hear someone say that.

[Carôusoul]

You get what you give. If you don't believe in love then you are destined to be loveless. Enjoy your wallow in self pity. And enjoy lying to others (and yourself). Oh noes. If you don't believe in Middle Earth you are destined to be without it your whole life. Sucks. I'm not very self-pitying at all. In fact, from every post you've made on here, I think I'm probably more happy than you in life. Enjoy your wallow in self pity. And enjoy lying to others (and yourself). So, because I've been cheated on and fucked over I'm not allowed have a sense of value. I can't appreciate the institution of marriage simply because I've never been married? You people are making less and less sense. And that's a real accomplishment, even for this group. Ugh. I'm just saying you can't rave about soemthings greatness having never done it. Stick to "admiring from afar". Frankly, I'm sick of discussing grown-up stuff with a bunch of selfish brats children with little to no sense of perspective and what's really important in life. What's important in life? Failed marriages? Like I said, if you feel that you aren't willing or suited to make a real commitment to someone else then don't. But don't go trashing marriage because you're too immature to understand what REAL love is really all about. Or, more specifically, what marriage is all about. Haha.

[Carôusoul]

Not that I'm one to talk but... I'm glad to hear someone say that. You tell em straight.

[GestaltAlteration]

Oh noes. If you don't believe in Middle Earth you are destined to be without it your whole life. Sucks. I'm not very self-pitying at all. In fact, from every post you've made on here, I think I'm probably more happy than you in life. Enjoy your wallow in self pity. And enjoy lying to others (and yourself). People write down what bothers them. Its a therapeutic, so its no surprise to see woes online. The support from strangers is one of a kind. Ugh. I'm just saying you can't rave about soemthings greatness having never done it. Stick to "admiring from afar". Have you been married? (assuming you got your parents consent for obvious reasons). Some insights come with age even without the full experience. What's important in life? Failed marriages? Haha. You like rubbing shit in peoples faces, don't you? I'm sure you'll get your fair share of shit in the future.

[Carôusoul]

People write down what bothers them. Its a therapeutic, so its no surprise to see woes online. The support from strangers is one of a kind. Indeed. Have you been married? (assuming you got your parents consent for obvious reasons). Some insights come with age even without the full experience. No consent needed in my country from parents. Apart from that; "Indeed" You like rubbing shit in peoples faces, don't you? Yes. I'm sure you'll get your fair share of shit in the future. Indeed.

[GestaltAlteration]

You've been married? Well, you win this time.

[Carôusoul]

Multi-kill.

[grasshoppa]

And when did I say that love can't occur without a ring, a piece of paper and a public ceremony? Never, actually. What I did say is that you (anyone) shouldn't lie to someone else and pretend that it does matter to you if it doesn't. If marriage is such a "oh, no, my life is ruined; I think I'll keep on doing the same selfish stuff I always do" event then why the hell should those with that opinion be allowed to water it down and ruin its importance for the rest of us? Can I get your opinion on gay marriage? Since you seem to think it's so imporatnt and sacred. Frankly, I'm sick of discussing grown-up stuff with a bunch of selfish brats children with little to no sense of perspective and what's really important in life. Grown-ups...lol havent used that term since I was 5. Like I said, if you feel that you aren't willing or suited to make a real commitment to someone else then don't. But don't go trashing marriage because you're too immature to understand what REAL love is really all about. Or, more specifically, what marriage is all about. Why do you need to be married in order to feel like you are commiting yourself? You should be commited to that person before marriage if you ever want to have a chance of it lasting.

[Carôusoul]

Grasshoppa knows. I sense a disturbance in the GH.

[cuddleyperson]

hmm Oneironaught i guess i'll speak my mind, however i am only 16, so disregard what my opinions from lack of life experience if you will... Obviously marriage is very important to you, may i ask if this is related to any religious beliefs/upbringing? Anyway like some have said, marriage is a large commitment and yes i suppose it solidifies your feelings toward each other and is surely an amazing experience. However i don't think you have the right to portray all those who do not agree marriage is necessary for commitment as people who cannot love or have commitment themselves. Although it's obvious you disagree with this opinion i will say it anyway. I believe that if a couple are even thinking of marriage, then in their hearts they should already have an ever lasting love and commitment to one another. So personally i don't see, apart from to prove it others if you need to do that for reinforcement, what a piece of paper and some vows really add to your commitment. Also unfortunately, although you may think you wish to live forever, things can change, there are so many variables. We like to think as humans we are such compassionate creatures and so loyal, we can be yes, but we are not above animals in our basic instincts. After 20 years a couple can plane, loss their sense of love, why? Because naturally we are not necessarily a monogamous(ist?) species, in fact not to long ago a man had many wifes. Now i;m not saying that's good or right. But i just think marriage can make a relationship seem forced, especially with time if there are troubles. I can;t exactly word my feelings and the previous paragraph probably makes me seem shallow, which is not true. I guess i'm just trying to explain that: 1) Marriage is not needed for full commitment or love 2) Things don't always last forever, as sad as it is, when people need to move on, marriage can be a depressing obstacle in any cases. I don't want to fight about it though, your entitled to your opinion also, it is a very noble one.

[Oneironaught]

Not that I'm one to talk but... I'm glad to hear someone say that. Thank you. I feel like I'm the only one around here who ever stands up for what's right and just and who speaks out openly against what's wrong with the world. Even though I know for a fact that quite a few members actually stand by me in private (PMs and such), it's a rarity that some one actually has the guts (or freedom, in some people's cases) to publicly side with what's right rather than to put upon a pedestal all the bull crap that permeates today's world. Oh noes. If you don't believe in Middle Earth you are destined to be without it your whole life. Sucks. I'm once again pelted by the immature ramblings of some one who has no idea what he's talking about. You know, with everything I see of you I like you just a little bit less (alright, that's an exageration for my own sick amusement). Coincidence? I think not. Nothing personal, of course. Ugh. I'm just saying you can't rave about soemthings greatness having never done it. Stick to "admiring from afar". That's another prime example of the fact that you are far too immature to make such a decision. Come speak to me in about 10 years and we'll see how much your opinion has grown. My guess is that you'll have a much better perspective on the world and a far greater ability to make an intelligent stance on the marriage issue. Until then, you're just speaking from your rectum. Rectum? Hell, damn near killed 'em. What's important in life? Failed marriages? When you're done smoking that crack may I have a word with you? Dude, your eyes are so glazed over. You might want to lay down for a little while. Feeling better? Good... From what in my posting history have you derived "failed marriage = good"? I'm guessing it's the part you just retrieved from your ass because my stance is in rather remarkable contrast to your implications. Can I get your opinion on gay marriage? Since you seem to think it's so imporatnt and sacred. No, you may not. I'm not opening another door for children to bash a mature view of the world. I will refer only to marriage in the traditional sense. Nothing else is relevant to this conversation. Grown-ups...lol havent used that term since I was 5. So what has changed for you in the past year? Besides the whole turning 6 thing? Why do you need to be married in order to feel like you are commiting yourself? You should be commited to that person before marriage if you ever want to have a chance of it lasting. One of these days some one here will actually read before they comment. I know, don't hold my breath. Exactly when did I claim that love comes only with a marriage vow? Answer: NEVER. In fact, I believe that love MUST come before marriage in order for it to have even a glimmer of hope. Whoaaa! Deja-vu... It seems like I've already stated all of this. Could it be my mind playing tricks on me? Nope, I'll be damned. I DID say this already. Oh you silly kids these days. Always putting your foot in your mouth. hmm Oneironaught i guess i'll speak my mind, however i am only 16, so disregard what my opinions from lack of life experience if you will... I respect your opinion. What I don't respect is the way others find joy in bashing marriage simply because they lack the ability to appreciate what it means and stands for. More importantly: what it CAN mean to those involved. Obviously marriage is very important to you, may i ask if this is related to any religious beliefs/upbringing? To be honest, I don't draw my views from a religious standpoint at all. I just believe that marriage is a contract that should only be entered into if both parties are serious about it. I'm tired of seeing everything that makes life great being systematically destroyed by those who couldn't give a shit. I'm tired of seeing the trends gravitate towards "serve thyself and fuck everybody else". I'm tired of people who think they have to cater to bullshit and bow to idiocy trying to fuck up what's worked for so long. I'm tired of seeing people fuck over others because they feel entitled to do so. I believe that your word is all your really have, as far as your interaction with others goes. Like I've said, if some one doesn't feel marriage is right for them: FINE. I have no problem with some one not wanting to become involved and give their all to some one else for the greater good of each. But don't think I'm going to stand by while a bunch of people who have just sprouted the first pubes on their nuts try to bash what's good and right with the world. If you've never been in love - I mean truly in love, not some playground crush - then to say that marriage is a pile of bullshit is, well, a pile of bullshit. All it proves is how short-sighted and shallow people can be. However i don't think you have the right to portray all those who do not agree marriage is necessary for commitment as people who cannot love or have commitment themselves. Not another word until you READ WHAT I SAID. I'm sick of being taken out of context and I'm sick of people trying to put words into my mouth. Especially when I've plainly stated my view and have left no room for misinterpretation. Although it's obvious you disagree with this opinion i will say it anyway. I believe that if a couple are even thinking of marriage, then in their hearts they should already have an ever lasting love and commitment to one another. I agree with that (the bolded part) 100%. So personally i don't see, apart from to prove it others if you need to do that for reinforcement, what a piece of paper and some vows really add to your commitment. Wait until you find "The one". Hopefully you will have a change of heart. Even if you don't, I can respect that. But don't be fooled into thinking that marriage is nothing more than a piece of paper. That paper is only what the government sees. It's the underlying intention and commitment that gives the paper its value. It's the willingness to make that step into the ultimate relationship situation that gives it its value. You folks are searching for the forest when you're standing here completely surrounded by trees. Don't look at the legal crap. That's only formality and posturing. Look at what it means if you want to understand what marriage is. Look at the implications. Look at the enormous promise to love and cherish you make. It can be the ultimate in expression, the ultimate in commitment: as long as it's done for the right reasons. But i just think marriage can make a relationship seem forced, especially with time if there are troubles. ONLY if it's done for the wrong reasons. Remember, marriage is to be a binding heart-to-heart contract for only those who VALUE its message and significance. Not every relationship is marriage material. Hell, most are not. 1) Marriage is not needed for full commitment or love I think I've already hammered that one to death*. Verdict: agreed. Next... 2) Things don't always last forever, as sad as it is, when people need to move on, marriage can be a depressing obstacle in any cases. That's why it's of utmost importance that the vows be taken seriously. I can't stress enough that it's all about what you put into it. If one or both parties enter marriage with a half-assed attitude of "Well, the odds are against us but, what the hell. I'm up for a fun frolic" then it's doomed before it begins. Another part of marriage is the courage to not bail just because you're going through a rocky patch. Every relationship has its ups and downs. If you love some one enough to marry them don't you think they deserve for you two to try to work past the rough patches? When you are with the right person, those are just speed bumps, not Earth shakers. And sure, not all marriages are going to be a success. But you can increase your odds of a happy marriage by cooking with the right ingredients. If it's all based in lies, cheating and half-hearted superficial promises then, yes, your chances are pretty darned poor. That's why it's so vital to realise that marriage must be taken seriously, not thrown around like so many cliches. The underlying problem is that we've developed a culture wherein marriage has become a joke. Too many people get married for all the wrong reasons: convenience, babies out of wedlock, "something to do for the weekend", etc... with little regard for what they are really doing and for the promise they are making to someone who expects that promise to be honored. I don't want to fight about it though, your entitled to your opinion also, it is a very noble one. As are you and yours. Hopefully you (and I) will one day find some one who fills your heart with so much love that you can't imagine life without them. THAT'S what marriage is about. You dont have to have been married yourself to understand the significance it can have in your life. But it has to be with the right person and it has to be for the right reasons. Just because so many fools today enter marriage on a shallow whim doesn't discredit the entire institution. It only strengthens the notion that you have to mean what you say and say what you mean. "I do" doesn't mean "I do whomever and whatever I please." Save that shit for Jerry Springer. Better tidy up the green room. You're about to be called on stage. * That's what she said :-)

[Xox]

Thank you. I feel like I'm the only one around here who ever stands up for what's right and just and who speaks out openly against what's wrong with the world. Even though I know for a fact that quite a few members actually stand by me in private (PMs and such), it's a rarity that some one actually has the guts (or freedom, in some people's cases) to publicly side with what's right rather than to put upon a pedestal all the bull crap that permeates today's world. I just want to come here and say that I totally agree with GH on this one. It's responses like these : Oh noes. If you don't believe in Middle Earth you are destined to be without it your whole life. Sucks. I'm not very self-pitying at all. In fact, from every post you've made on here, I think I'm probably more happy than you in life. Enjoy your wallow in self pity. And enjoy lying to others (and yourself). What's important in life? Failed marriages? I sense a disturbance in the GH. That make this accurate: I'm once again pelted by the immature ramblings of some one who has no idea what he's talking about. You know, with everything I see of you I like you just a little bit less (alright, that's an exageration for my own sick amusement). Coincidence? I think not. Nothing personal, of course. Just wanted to put my two cents in.

[ClouD]

Dear Oneironaught, your lack of tolerance is a murky reflection of behaviour. I wouldn't mind discussing love and marriage, yet it's always up to the interpretation of the reader to filter out unwanted noise. If you can't be bothered, that is entirely your choice. Though do understand it is a choice. Life is just a game. I think it is a hinderance to someone who doesn't understand what commitments truly are... an illusion. Right and wrong, only interpretations of difference. Again, choice seems to be the factor of avidity here. Preference seems decided by choice, not vice versa.

[Ruhe1986]

Dear Oneironaught, your lack of tolerance is a murky reflection of behaviour. I wouldn't mind discussing love and marriage, yet it's always up to the interpretation of the reader to filter out unwanted noise. If you can't be bothered, that is entirely your choice. Though do understand it is a choice. Life is just a game. I think it is a hinderance to someone who doesn't understand what commitments truly are... an illusion. Right and wrong, only interpretations of difference. Again, choice seems to be the factor of avidity here. Preference seems decided by choice, not vice versa. Poetry sheer poetry my friend.

[Siиdяed]

I'm sick of being taken out of context and I'm sick of people trying to put words cocks into my mouth. Especially when I've plainly stated my view and have left no room for misinterpretation. Gay!

[Oneironaught]

Dear Oneironaught, your lack of tolerance is a murky reflection of behaviour. Another bonehead that refuses to hear WHAT I SAID. What, pray tell, is even the slightest bit intolerant about "if you decide to get married you should honor your commitments and if you aren't interested in marriage then keep your mouth shut and quite trying to bash it"? Apparently you just thought you'd be another cute wise-ass trying to twist my words into your own little version of stupidity. Life is just a game. More meaningless cliches from more meaningless posters. I think it is a hinderance to someone who doesn't understand what commitments truly are... an illusion. There you go proving my point again. Here, let me spell it out for you since you seem to be so blinded by your own ignorance: If you don't "understand what commitments truly" then marriage IS NOT for you. And if you really think that commitments are "an illusion" then you have A LOT to learn: about love, about life and, obviously, about commitment. And we wonder why today's world is so screwed up Poetry sheer poetry my friend. Uh, your taste in "poetry" leaves a lot to be desired. Gay! Wow, now Sindred has manged to be a total prick. Welcome to my list of assholes. Why don't you sit and spin.

[Carôusoul]

Another bonehead that refuses to hear WHAT I SAID. What, pray tell, is even the slightest bit intolerant about "if you decide to get married you should honor your commitments and if you aren't interested in marriage then keep your mouth shut and quite trying to bash it"? Apparently you just thought you'd be another cute wise-ass trying to twist my words into your own little version of stupidity. More meaningless cliches from more meaningless posters. There you go proving my point again. Here, let me spell it out for you since you seem to be so blinded by your own ignorance: If you don't "understand what commitments truly" then marriage IS NOT for you. And if you really think that commitments are "an illusion" then you have A LOT to learn: about love, about life and, obviously, about commitment. And we wonder why today's world is so screwed up Uh, your taste in "poetry" leaves a lot to be desired. Wow, now Sindred has manged to be a total prick. Welcome to my list of assholes. Why don't you sit and spin. I think Sindred was joking.. You're fummmingg. Lulz.

[Oneironaught]

I think Sindred was joking.. No, I think he was being a fucking dick. Much like yourself. You're fummmingg. Lulz. Dickhead much? LULZ <--- the favorite expression of said penile cranium. I'm an asshole. Finally, something we can all agree on.

[Siиdяed]

Haha. GH just went coco-loco.

[PatienceMarie]

...I wonder if you get this. I feel... so... stupid.... I had to look at that for like 15 minutes to get it. -patience

[Siиdяed]

I'm sexually frustrated, took me 0.1 seconds.

[Oneironaught]

Haha. GH just went coco-loco. Just? No, that happened a long time ago. But thanks for being a jerk to me. I really appreciate that. No really, I do. Maybe you guys need to put some "words" into your own mouths. It might help keep the thoughtless shit from leaking out.

[Siиdяed]

Just? No, that happened a long time ago. But thanks for being a jerk to me. I really appreciate that. No really, I do. No problem.

[PatienceMarie]

I'm sexually frustrated, took me 0.1 seconds. I'm just blonde.... Point period dot dot dot. -patience