These Dreams Won't Stop

**Thatdreamr** · 05-26-2013 11:38 AM

Hey guys, new here.

So for th past 2 1/2 years I've been having dreams about one of my exes. He was my first love, first kiss. He was th sweetest guy ever, and was the only one that made me feel wanted. We were bestfriends before we dated, which was only for almost 2 months.

He said were better off as just friends and started talking to his ex and another girl. I don't know if that was going on at the end of our relationship or not. We never hung out because i was too shy and he didnt ask. I look back at that now and im not shy, so maybe that could've changed things.

On the other hand, I never think about him when im awake. I've been in a relationship for 2 years (broke it off in Feb) and even through that time i would have the dreams!

Usually the dreams are about him asking me to go somewhere, do something, get back together, etc. Then i get ready to go and were together then i just wake up. Or others times i don't get th chance to go and i wake up.

I don't know what these dreams could mean. They are getting very frustrating as i cant help but question them for whole day after i have them.

**RavenOfShadow** · 05-26-2013 04:19 PM

Interesting. I have had these dreams off and on about my first "love" as well, under the same exact scenarios. Usually it would start with us hanging out and doing something fun, then it would grow very serious and she would ask to get back together, which never ended well because I always gently denied it.

I believe you are suffering from a lack of closure, like I was. I'm sure you are still wondering things like; "why wasn't I good enough? What changed?". Those we percieve as our "first love" always stay with us.

After a few months of these dreams I decided to finally give closure to both of us. Our break up was sudden and ugly, and after a few months she moved back to England and Spain. So one night a few months ago a decided to write her a simple Facebook message with nothing but truth. Why I had ended things, that I still think about her constantly, but that its time for both of us to forgive, maybe be friends, and to move on.

After a few messages back and forth we parted ways, finally with closure. Haven't dreamed about her since really, and in the rare occasions I do she is just a dream character filling space.

You need to give yourself closure, by either contacting him or finding it in yourself to say "Oh well, it was 2 months."

Thats the other thing, you sound quite young. You will discover love that makes the "love" you two felt seem absolutely ridiculous. I'm convinced that I have found my soulmate, and you will know it when you do as well, and all of this will seem silly!

So good luck

Try to confront him, if you can muster enough bravery. But remember, fifteen minutes of talking could save you a lifetime of "what ifs".

~Raven

**Athylus** · 05-27-2013 12:06 AM

I've had a couple of dreams about my first love as well, probaly about 5 or so. Then I realised that it didn't work not because of me, and that the only one who can give me closure is I. In my case talking to my ex again would only make things worse, so I decided to remove and block her from everything completely. I still think about her, but I realise it wasn't real love. Then again, what IS real love? Attraction is not a choice. These dreams mean that you're still unconsciously thinking about him.

It will most likely go away over time, or once you engage in a more fulfilling relationship.

Good luck.

Also, only you know what will work for you. Just like Raven and I do. We can't decide for you, only share our experience.