being sweet.

[Waterknight]

well lots of girls always tell me that I am sweet or that something I say is really sweet or something. Ive come to this conclusion. the only problem with sweet is it gets a lot of girl friends but not always a girlfriend.

[Xei]

Have you considered becoming an absolute shit?

[dajo]

While there seems to be some validity to the 'jerk-attraction', there still are a lot of girls that look for the sweet type. And before you change who you are and pretend to be something you're not, I would suggest to keep looking until you find someone that is right for you. Plus you will have a much higher chance of ending up with true intimacy than just shallow attraction. By the way, confidence is more important and you can be confident without being a jerk.

[Spartiate]

You can show a little cockiness without being a jerk, most girls like that.

[Xei]

If you're looking for tips, how about becoming quiet and aloof? This comes naturally to me and it works like a dream.

[Irken]

I don't think it has anything to do with how sweet you are. Maybe you just don't come off manly enough, girls aren't going to ask you out or anything, not usually. So why don't you grow a pair and just ask them out.

[Waterknight]

Im not trying to get a girl right now. It was just a thought that came to my head after a few different girls telling me something I did or said was sweet. Im really not ready yet for another girlfriend after the last one. I was really trying to see if anyone agrees with that thought. Oh and xei im not sure exactly what you mean by aloof but I am quiet generally.

[Xei]

I mean the trick is to pull off quiet as an attribute of sophistication rather than stupidity.

[Waterknight]

Its really probably a shyness thing. I dont really like people. But with my friends I can be completely stupid and dont care.

[Puffin]

I'm guessing she just hasn't found you yet. Don't change yourself just so you can get one faster. This is coming from a girl - I hate it when people act differently just to create more relationships.

[Waterknight]

Im not trying to act differently or anything. Im not gonna change how I act. Is just something that seems true to me at least

[Marvo]

Im not trying to act differently or anything. Im not gonna change how I act. Is just something that seems true to me at least Yes, your lack of success with girls is you being too nice. You're just too good for them. Keep telling yourself that.

[Waterknight]

umm idk if that is sarcasm or not. Its not like i dont have any success at all with girls either. Im not looking for a girlfriend now anyways. I was ith my last gf for almost 2 years thought

[Luna]

Im sorry...... HUH? And @marvo Yu silly dude You made him confussled

[Invader]

What do you do that's "sweet"? Give us some specific examples. If you're just throwing out compliments you'll come off as more of a kiss-ass and a pushover than anything else. It'll also establish you as being lower on the social hierarchy. You want to be treated as an equal, not a subordinate.

[Waterknight]

Yeah compliments are part of it but its mostly the fact that I always listen to my friends and stuff. If they have any problems I try to help and i am always there if they just need someone to talk to. Also things that just make girls laugh and feel good. Anything that helps.

[Xei]

To be honest even your posts are making me feel a bit fuzzy inside.

[CryoDragoon]

Yeah.. Basically, if you act like just-a-friend, you will be just-a-friend. I have an analogy... Just from the top of my head, so I hope it'll work, a'ight ;p Imagine your life. Pretty neat, right? Now imagine your life where you could eat only sweets. That'd be boring, wouldn't it? You would long for something spicy and mmmmnomnomnom somewhere along the way, right, and after a while, it'd just become 'meh'? So what can we conclude from this? Sure, sweetness has its place in your life from time to time, but only sweetness would be stupid. So: don't be just-sweet.. Be sweet-and-spicy ;p And since you gotta be attractive to the opposite gender, I'd say the recepy you ought to follow is 2 parts spicy, 1 part sweet. In other words: for every sweet thing you do, do two spicy things (roughly speaking, of course ;p). So: Don't just pay compliments, also tease people for the weird things that they do, the weirdness that's embodied inside of them somewhere. For every compliment you give, tease 'em two times (do note that this doesn't have to mean they won't enjoy themselves either). Don't just listen to them, have a say in conversations yourself as well. Be passionate and talk! For every thing they say, you say two things of your own; for every topic they introduce into the conversation, you introduce two awsome topics (do note that this doesn't have to mean they won't enjoy themselves either). Don't just make them laugh. Every time you make them laugh, do or say two things that makes yourself laugh (do note that this doesn't have to mean they won't enjoy themselves either). See what I mean? So there you have it.. Out of the relatively few details you've given us, if I were to give you some sort of mantra that you could rely on for now, it'd be this: One part sweet, two parts spicy. Awsome! Now you go, tiger! And do keep us updated on what happens and how you're doing, a'ight? Have a great day! Tim

[Waterknight]

Haha Cryo good. Hows this? she sticks her tounge out "be careful I might bite it".

[Irken]

That's just awkward and creepy. My advise is just be yourself, say what you think would be normal and don't push yourself to be more than yourself.

[Snowboy]

Have you considered becoming an absolute shit? That gave me a good laugh! If you're looking for tips, how about becoming quiet and aloof? This comes naturally to me and it works like a dream. You can show a little cockiness without being a jerk, most girls like that. Ha, then I'm in luck for the future! I don't talk near as much IRL as on here. Haha Cryo good. Hows this? she sticks her tounge out "be careful I might bite it". That's just creepy. Don't try it. Especially if you say "I might bite it." Who the hell wants their tongue bitten? Anyway, to the... something (for lack of a better word) at hand. It's really good that you're being told that you're sweet! That should score you some good girlfriends in the future! Some things that should help you in this field: confidence and slight cockiness. I agree with Spartiate and Xei with what they said (except the being an absolute shit part ), but I have a few add-ons for them. When you try to act a bit confident and cocky, do it in a more joking manner than anything else. Try to make yourself look confident, but don't make it look like it's getting to your head. If you just exude some confidence but still treat people right, you are heading on a good path. Good luck!

[Waterknight]

well I said it cuz its happened to me lol. B ut I find it hard to be cocky because Im really not all that confident. I did tell this one girl that I should start working out and try to get some muscles and abs and tyhat if I did that there wouldnt be a girl around that wouldnt like me. She told me she wouldnt like me then because she wouldnt want the competetion lol.

[♥Mark]

Just be yourself, but not too much yourself. Also be better than yourself. You said you are not all that confident. Well you should pretend you are. Everyone likes actors. I think the most important part is to have "pizzazz." It's that unmistakable amorphous x-factor that is so vague you can never be sure if you have it. But if you assume that you have it, you will! If you find this advice causes you to behave in a conflicted fashion, then good. Conflict is the source of all interesting stories and you must be interesting. The less that what you are doing makes sense to you the more likely you are to be successful.

[Waterknight]

hmm so try to use my writing style in real life. I base my characyers in stories off of myself to a point. But they are all the best qualities of myself. and a few made up ones I wish I had. Im a writer and I can sit down and write something that can make someone feel any kind of feeling I want them to feel. But when i speak i have a very slight stutter and I can barely put a sentence together that makes sense. Like how my posts have been lol. The way my posts have been is kinda my speaking voice. But I can write and be the absolute best guy there is anywhere.

[no-Name]

But I can write and be the absolute best guy there is anywhere. Just be as confident as you are right here in this post Conflict is the source of all interesting stories also this is the greatest and truest thing