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    1. #1
      Legend Jeff777's Avatar
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      Post Editing/Revisions/Proof-Reading Department

      This forum is for the writers to post things that may need editing, revised and/or proof-read. If you don't want to wait for them to post in here, you are more than welcome to automatically take their work and edit it to your liking and post the revised version in here. Just be sure to let them know what you did so they may see the finished snippings.
      Department Leader: Department leader's are supervisors of a certain department. They make sure work is being done and they have the authority to tweak, organize, call meetings etc. Staff may consult their department leader and department leader's may consult the Project Leader. Department leader's can hire additional staff members for their department at their discretion. Department leader's, if a staff member is not staying on task or doing what you are asking him/her for the benefit of the department (and ultimately the project) you can recommend them for termination to the Project Leader. Once again, I encourage Department leader's to hire more staff for their departments. To personally hire a new staff member, have them fill out an application and within that application in the additional comments section, have they say that you personally hired them.


      The author of this post wrote this cognizant of the fact that staff members work in more than one department.

      -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


      Editing/Revisions/Proof-Reading Department Staff

      Department Leader: CoLd BlooDed

      Naiya, Jeff, CoLd BlooDed, Beeyahoi
      Last edited by Jeff777; 09-26-2009 at 11:20 AM.
      Things are not as they seem

    2. #2
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      I can't wait to get started on this. It looks like Chapter 1,3 & 4 have the most progress (links in brianstorming thread)

      I'll get started on going through what we have and post any revisions here. For those involved in this department please do the same and highlight any corrections in red. As stated above, let the orginal writer know that thier work as been revised.
      Last edited by dreamingofdreaming; 07-01-2009 at 09:23 PM.

    3. #3
      Member CoLd BlooDed's Avatar
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      Reporting for duty!


      Starry starry night, paint your pallet blue and gray,
      Look out on a summers day,
      with eyes that know the darkness of my soul.


    4. #4
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by CoLd BlooDed View Post
      Reporting for duty!
      Thanks soildier! Your presence is appreciated!

    5. #5
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      Hey, pops.
      Bollocks.

    6. #6
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      i need this edited/read through

      Tell me if there is anything i might need to add or change.

      Spoiler for -:

    7. #7
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      Quote Originally Posted by Banana View Post
      i need this edited/read through

      Tell me if there is anything i might need to add or change.

      Spoiler for -:
      Close Banana, close. There were just a couple of spelling mistakes, nothing serious. Here is the edited result that you can use:

      Spoiler for -:

    8. #8
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      edit:



      Here it is

      Spoiler for The Dream World:
      Last edited by Banana; 07-04-2009 at 02:42 AM.

    9. #9
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      Quote Originally Posted by Banana View Post
      edit:



      Here it is

      Spoiler for The Dream World:
      Again, close. There were as before just a few spelling errors.

      Spoiler for The Dream World:

    10. #10
      Member CoLd BlooDed's Avatar
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      Quote Originally Posted by Banana View Post
      i need this edited/read through

      Tell me if there is anything i might need to add or change.

      Spoiler for -:
      I think you might want to reword the 'Good placebo/Bad placebo' bit... I was going to rewrite it but I don't even know what you're trying to say there. You basically said they're the exact same thing even though you divided them into good and bad.


      Starry starry night, paint your pallet blue and gray,
      Look out on a summers day,
      with eyes that know the darkness of my soul.


    11. #11
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      This better?

      Spoiler for -:

    12. #12
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      Great information and examples; just a few thoughts...

      It seems very choppy and the one line sentences don't fit in; they could probably all be in one paragraph. If the history paragraph goes after the definition one then the examples can go at the bottom and it would all flow a little better...

      I also took out some sentences that I felt were redundant. Please feel free to edit again and make any comments or questions...

      Spoiler for -:

    13. #13
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      The Dream World

      Great start Banana! And thanks for editing shades

      I think having a brilliant description of a "dream world" would be a great intro to this. Including all the common dream elements in a creative way i.e. non functioning technology, anti gravity, scary mirrors, abstract images/colors etc... If anyone has any ideas go ahead. I'll conjure up something this week...

      CB thanks for editing the placebo effect post also

    14. #14
      Member CoLd BlooDed's Avatar
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      No problem.

      Also, I should mention, the [[-wordswordswordsexample]] means that sentence has been taken out. I think you should also quote the edited version?


      Starry starry night, paint your pallet blue and gray,
      Look out on a summers day,
      with eyes that know the darkness of my soul.


    15. #15
      !DIREKTOR! Adam's Avatar
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      This is going to get messy having everything in one thread, however can I make a couple of suggestions to help you keep some order.

      Track all changes: So if you make an emend, use strikethrough to show what you've deleted. Use red to show what text you've added.
      Control the versions of your chapters, for example, your initial version will be v0.1 this will make it easier if more than one person are reviewing. So if you post up v0.1 I will review it, make changes and if accepted this then becomes v0.2 - so everyone works from the right version.

      [edit: actually I notice CB did that, can I suggest everyone does the same, maybe using strike out for deleted though]

      For example:

      Spoiler for Placebos : Version 0.1:


      Spoiler for Placebos : Version 0.2:

    16. #16
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      Yeah, I was thinking yesterday (after CB's post), that we definitely need a better system to track changes. Lets use Adam's suggestion above, it may take a little longer to do but will save time in the end.

      Thanks Adam and CB

    17. #17
      Legend Jeff777's Avatar
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      Great post Adam, and I agree with you and dreaming. Regarding the room we have...the rest of the forum is for all of us to use however we like. Feel free to create new topics to log your personal progress and what not.
      Things are not as they seem

    18. #18
      Legend Jeff777's Avatar
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      Editors and Proof-readers! Please do both to the following intro. Ammend anything you deem necessary.

      dreamingofdreaming, if you would like someone in particular to work on this, please PM them.



      http://docs.google.com/View?id=ddm75ss6_29d5r3n7d4
      Things are not as they seem

    19. #19
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      Spoiler for original: Version #1:



      Spoiler for Edited: Version #2:


      Great start!! I basically corrected spelling errors and minor grammatical issues. I also changed most if not all contractions, others may feel differently. I also found tense to be an issue, I tried keeping it consistent. To all others in this department please make any further changes or suggestions. Thanks!
      Last edited by dreamingofdreaming; 07-13-2009 at 05:44 AM.

    20. #20
      hm. . marcc's Avatar
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      Spoiler for edited (nice work, dude):
      The question is What is the question?
      Thanks, Jeff777, for adopting me.

      [Flavour of Night] 10:06 pm: Banana, DV is not a dating site.

    21. #21
      of dreaming dreamingofdreaming's Avatar
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      Thanks Marcc, however, to keep this neat we need to keep a chronological order of the versions edited. So the original that Jeff posted is #1, the Version I edited is #2 (I apologize for not numbering it; fixed) and then the next version (from #2) would be #3 and so forth. My version has the same edits yours had (minus a few) anyways. So add in any differences that you find from mine or make suggestions on my edits.

      Thank you!!!

    22. #22
      Legend Jeff777's Avatar
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      Marcc, great. However, - Jess is right. Feel free to tweak and/or revise already revised versions of original drafts. Doing this forces the editors to catch and chip away at errors the first editor(s) may have skipped.
      Last edited by Jeff777; 07-13-2009 at 05:59 AM.
      Things are not as they seem

    23. #23
      Ehh..Well..Uhm...HUGS!
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      Hi, just to let you know, I'm pasting this in google docs. I'll be sure to post back here. It's just that google docs is a little easier than posting here all the time.

      http://www.dreamviews.com/community/...ad.php?t=80523
      ^Please use that topic for the intro from now on
      Last edited by ThreeLetterSyndrom; 07-13-2009 at 11:42 AM.
      http://i96.photobucket.com/albums/l199/ablativus/spidermansig2.png

    24. #24
      hm. . marcc's Avatar
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      yay!

      I was quivering at the idea of editing an editor's work, but it seems like it's what the cool kids (us) should do
      The question is What is the question?
      Thanks, Jeff777, for adopting me.

      [Flavour of Night] 10:06 pm: Banana, DV is not a dating site.

    25. #25
      Member CoLd BlooDed's Avatar
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      Hey, sorry guys, I was gone for the weekend. Ready to get on this again.


      Starry starry night, paint your pallet blue and gray,
      Look out on a summers day,
      with eyes that know the darkness of my soul.


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